BGM: 

Taemin ‘Day and Night’ 

Jonghyun “Only One You Need” 

This chapter is inspired by: Various events in 2017.

It will be separated into Part 1 and Part 2. 

Note: **The following chapter may be sensitive, please read at your own risk. 

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(Pt 1)

August 2017. 

Right after SHINee's Japan Tour in early 2017, Taemin had to prepare for his first solo concert. He was faced with extreme pressure — without s, he had to be in control of everything on stage - from vocals, dance, fashion, to stage presence, lighting and audio control. On top of that, he had to prepare for his new album release, film a new variety show, dramas… His schedules were packed. He had almost no time to rest. He loved his career, he loved being on stage, and he was fighting for his dreams and his passion. 

But he has forgotten that she needed his love and care. 

He was so busy to the point where texting became infrequent, daily video calls turned into weekly ones, gradually, he was so stressed that even when he had the time, he forgot about her. 

Naeun had her own dreams and passion too. 2017 was a year where Apink got more public recognition. Their sales dropped in their last comeback, but Apink’s comeback in May - with “FIVE” still got them to win a few trophies at music shows. Above this, Naeun has been asked to feature in Psy’s New Face music video. She was being recognised by the public — as the center, the visual of Apink. After Eunji, she is now the second most popular member in Apink. Advertisements, show invites… they all came to her at once. She was tired. She enjoyed it, but she wasn’t used to this much public exposure. 

Both of them had their own burden on their shoulders. They lost contact to the point where they could only be reminded of each other through the news. 

She first noticed the emptiness around her. He wasn’t there for her. 

She had her own worries, her job, her life. But he was never there to listen to her thoughts and feelings. They were always busy, so busy that they couldn’t connect to each other anymore, and that when she found something that she wanted to share to him, he wasn’t there.

When they started dating at the end of 2014, they promised to wait for each other, to wait until their careers mature. But at this point, Naeun realised that both of their careers has just started. It would take at least a few years for their careers to mature. She couldn’t just wait for him. She had her own life, and he had his too. 

Reality came and punched her in the face. She saw the dead-ends of their relationship, and couldn’t find any ways that they could work out anymore. 

Naeun decided to break up with him. 

She walked alone, along the Han River, with a mask and a cap on. The sea breeze grazed her cheek lightly, as she looked up at the sparkling night sky. She took a deep breath, then dialled his number. 

“Hello? Naeun-ah.” He answered. 

“Oppa, are you free at the moment?” She asked cautiously. 

“Yea, I am.” 

She remained silent for a while. It had been such a long time that they had contact each other. It was weird, hearing his voice on the phone again. 

She took a deep breath again. 

“Oppa. Let’s break up.” Her voice was as light as feather. 

He remained silent. 

She took a deep breath -- for the third time, as tears began to water her eyes. 

“We’ve been dating for a while, and those were the happiest moments of my life. I’m glad I met you through WGM, and I’m glad we’ve loved each other for so long. It’s just… oppa… we’re celebrities… you’re busy, and I’m busy. Whenever I need someone… you just wouldn’t be there. I won’t blame you, oppa. I really understand your stress and how busy you are, but I’m just tired of this. I’m tired of thinking so much, I’m tired of maintaining this relationship when we have so much on our shoulders.” Words flowed out from automatically. It has been a while since she has said so much to him at once. As she poured out her thoughts to him, she could feel her emotions rising up. Tears started swelling up her eyes. 

Her voice became hoarse. “Oppa. I’m sorry. I don’t think our relationship could work anymore.” She bit her lip as tears flowed down her cheeks. 

There was a moment where he wanted to run to her, to tell her that she’s wrong, to tell her that there’s still hope in this relationship. 

But he couldn’t. Because he was losing faith too. 

He blamed himself. He couldn’t protect their relationship. He realised how hard it was - for two people to stay together, especially when both of them had so much to do. He was the one who unintentionally left her alone. He still loves her, but that doesn’t mean that he can give up on his dreams and passion as well. He loved dancing, he loved singing, he loved being on stage. He couldn’t give up on his life-long passion. He felt tired too. This relationship was getting harder to maintain because they were always apart. 

He chose to let her go. 

He promised himself silently, that one day, when he had achieved all his dreams, he would come back for her. He would run, and cherish her, because she was the one that he loved, the only person that he has ever loved in his whole life.

But life, has proved him wrong.

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Dec 18. 2017

Breaking: SHINee's Jonghyun was found unconscio