You've read the books

You've watched the shows

What's the best way no one knows

Meditate, get hypnotized

Anything to take from your mind

But it won't go

She thought Chaeyoung was late, but after glancing at the time on her phone, she realized that she was just early. She should have known better; Chaeyoung was never late.

She was slowly winning the battle against jetlag, thanks to the help immense amount of black coffee and cigarettes, but she was still waking up earlier than usual even without the alarm clock. Which was probably why she was early today. She found herself awake in the balcony, snuffing a nicotine stick while her phone was buzzing alarm on her bed. 

The past week had been both busy and not busy for her. Busy because the rest of her things had arrived from London and silently screaming to be unpacked and sorted, everytime she passed at her things. And not busy because, well, she hadn’t done it yet. She blamed it on the fact that she did not have all her furniture yet, so she reasoned that it did not make sense to start unpacking if she did not have the right places to put her things.

So instead, she had spent the time exploring her new neighborhood, trying a new coffee shops every day, going to local markets, and reacquainting herself with life back in the Seoul (by eating Korean food, mostly bibimbap, malatang, and jokbal).

Today she was meeting with Chaeyoung to go buy furniture and fixtures. Dahyun told her best friend to meet her at this coffee shop, which was next on her list of places to try. It was only a walking distance from her apartment.

She ordered her black coffee and Chaeyoung’s strawberry frappe to go. When the cashier handed her the change, she glanced the sign on the wall above the jars read, “Which house will win the Hogwarts House Cup this week? Tips = House Points.”  she then noticed four jars for tips on the counter. She smiled after reading the House names and proceeded to drop all of her change into the Ravenclaw jar (It has the lowest amount of tips).

As she stood there waiting for the barista to finish making her drinks, she couldn’t help but to touch the ridiculously looking witch hat that had a face on it, it was called a 'sorting hat' and it was at the top of the jars. 

Chaeyoung walked through the door just as their drinks were called. Dahyun waved her over and handed her her strawberry drink when she reached her.

“Chaeyoung, look,” she said, pointing to the jars. “Isn’t that a clever way to get patrons to tip? I mean people don't usually give tips, but it's not illegal anyways.”

Chaeyoung glanced briefly to where she was pointing and shrugged. “I guess.”

“Which house do you think you belong to? I always thought I would like to be in Ravenclaw, because they are inquisitive and like to read. But I have also been called a Hufflepuff, which I can understand as well. I think I might also have traits of Gryffindor and Slytherin too. I do not think that is uncommon, though. I am sure many others feel like they embody some traits from each of the houses. But I like Ravenclaw the most because I would like to live in their tower and look at the stars whenever I want.”

Chaeyoung stood there, cup in hand, staring in bored disbelief as Dahyun continued to go on and on about . . . whatever she was talking about. 

“I have a little idea of what you're talking about and I also have a little interest about it.”

Dahyun looked mildly shocked. “Hogwarts? Harry Potter? Come on, it's a great fiction.”

Chaeyoung shook her head. “That doesn’t sound like something I would care about.” she groaned as they both made their way out of the coffee shop to her car. 

“Let me see the list of furnitures we are going to buy?”

3 Months (After Dahyun Left):

Chaeyoung sat on the couch in her living room, staring at her phone on the coffee table. She had to make a decision soon. Dahyun was going to call any second now. She closed her eyes and raised her fingers to press at her temples, lightly massaging it. Her unnies were giving her a major headache.

She had finally talked to Sana that day. For the first time since she slammed the door in her face that night. At the coffee shop where Dahyun used to work, where they met and where she had been waiting every Tuesday for the past three months, just like she said she would.

Chaeyoung had not believed her at first, her anger at Sana for driving her best friend out of the country still too fresh to think any kind thoughts of her. But about a month later, out of curiosity, she took a walk in the park on a Tuesday morning and passed by the coffee shop surreptitiously. She did indeed see the japanese there by herself, waiting patiently. That first time, she just chalked it up to the immediate guilt that the japanese must have been feeling and reasoned that once it passed, she would stop her foolish endeavor.

Chaeyoung went by again after two months, and she was there again. She knew it wouldn’t last too much longer.

Finally, when she saw her waiting there today, three months since Dahyun had left, she couldn’t help herself. She had to know what Sana was thinking. What game she was playing. She wouldn’t let her hurt Dahyun again. Not again. Not ever.

So she had walked right up to her table and sat down without an intro. The first words out of – You should stop this now, Sana. She’s not going to come – set the tone for the rest of the short, tense conversation.

Which consisted mainly of Sana apologizing and desperately asking and begging for information about Dahyun. But Chaeyoung was firm and staunch in her refusal to tell Sana anything. And when Sana realized that she wasn’t going to get anything out of Chaeyoung, she told her resolutely that she was going to continue to do this until Dahyun came.

But when Chaeyoung finally stood up to leave in anger at her stubbornness, Sana had reached out to grab her wrist to stop her. The fire inside Chaeyoung was all but extinguished when she turned back and saw the look in Sana’s eyes, pleading brown eyes. She had implored, in a soft whisper, “Please, Chaeyoung, just let her know that I’m here waiting. That’s all I ask.”

So here she was. About to talk to her best friend. And she had not decided whether or not she was going to do it. Whether or not she was going to tell her that her ex-girlfriend, the love of her life, the girl who she would do anything for, the girl she was going to propose to, the girl she was planning to spend the rest of her life with, the girl who abandoned her when life got rough and put her through so much pain and broke her heart so thoroughly that she had to move out of the country, all the way across the entire ing ocean, just so that she could heal and find herself again . . .  that very girl, was now waiting every week for her at the place they met to tell her that she still loved her.

You cannot make this up, Chaeyoung thought wryly.

Her phone rang before she could make up her mind. She picked it up and looked at it in her hand as she stalled. She had never seen her best friend as happy as she was when she was together with Sana, but she had also never seen her as lost and torn apart as when Sana left her.

But if there was a chance they could work it out ... She slided the request for facetime. 

“Hello, Dahyun?”

“Chaeyoung! Did I get you at a good time?”

“Yes, it’s fine. I was waiting for your call.”

“Great! I dyed my hair purple. Look, i think it looks great, right?”

Dahyun rotated the angle of her phone to let her best friend see her hair. “Yeah, it fits in you too, nice highlight, Dahyun.”

“So, did you do anything fun this morning?”

Chaeyoung paused for a second. It certainly wasn’t fun. “I took a walk in the park.”

“That's nice. I hope the weather is nicer there. It is still cold and rainy here, but I have learned to accept that I will never be truly dry here, ever.” She laughed. Chaeyoung thought it was the first real laugh she had heard from her best friend since she had left. It lifted some of the worry in her heart. Could Dahyun really be happy?

She heard Dahyun continue, “But one good thing to come from all this horrible weather is that I am making good progress on my lyric writing for that mix arrangement Jacskon gave me. So there’s that.”

“I'd really love it if you can let me listen sometimes.”

“Sure, I will send you once it's done. Jackson likes it so far.”

“You’re not just spending all of your time locked indoors working on your music stuffs, are you? I mean, you’re spending time outside and meeting people and all that, right? Have you made any friends?”

Dahyun laughed again. “Yes, Chaeyoung. Don’t worry. I am not a complete antisocial pycho here. Tzuyu has been rather kind and has shown me many of her favorite spots in London. She has also introduced me to her group of friends, who have all been very friendly. And by the way, they are also incredibly smart. Of course that’s not surprising, considering that they are all Ph.D. students in the sciences. It was a little intimidating at first, but after several dinners with them, they are all great friends. Some of them are good cooks too. ”

Chaeyoung listened attentively as Dahyun fondly recalled stories about her outings with her new friends. She sounded... lighter, as if a little more of the weight of her past with Sana had been lifted off of her shoulders with each passing night. She didn’t sound completely like her old self yet. Chaeyoung could still detect tinges of sadness in her voice, and could catch where her words would falter when she sometimes almost accidentally brought up her old life with Sana. No, she didn’t sound like her old self yet. But for the first time since she left, she sounded like she could get there someday.

Chaeyoung swallowed the lump in that had formed from that bittersweet realization. Dahyun was healing. She sounded happier..... better than she had been in over half a year.

Chayoung then made her decision . She didn’t want to undo all the progress Dahyun had made. Information about what Sana was doing would only cause her to doubt all the decisions she had made, and confuse her about what she should be doing. And when Chaeyoung remembered how devastated Dahyun had been, she knew that she could not do anything that even had a slight possibility of making her feel that way again.

No, she couldn’t do it.

“So, this Chou Tzuyu. She’s Jackson’s cousin, right?”

“Yes, that’s her. I met her when I first came here. She helped to set up my apartment. She’s around my age, and currently working on her Ph.D., so she also has a flexible work schedule. To be honest, I am quite thankful she is here. She showed me how to navigate the British way of doing things has been tremendously helpful.”

“Well, Don't go falling in love with London so much...... Remember, this is home.”

Chaeyoung saw her stare briefly at the unknown, (as if remembering that yes, Seoul....) as her words undoubtedly brought back memories of what home used to be and the reason she had to leave it.

When she still did not hear anything after several more seconds, Chaeyoung spoke again. “But I’m glad to hear that you’re doing better, Dahyun. You sound like you’re... really happy.”

Dahyun finally spoke. “I am, Chaeyoung. I’m doing better. I needed this. This distance thingy.” She sighed. “It’s not always easy. I still think about.... it.... sometimes.... about... what happened. But I find myself doing that less and less now. And it hurts less, those times I can’t stop myself from thinking about it. So I am glad I did this. I think I am on my way to learning how to be who I used to be, without... her.”

Her honest confession made Chaeyoung’s heart ache. She wanted more than anything to give her best friend a hug right now.

But of course, instead of expressing that, she deflected.

“Good. Because you better be your dorky self when I come to visit in five months. I already bought a ticket and you better get my room ready, Dahyun.”

It worked.

“Will do, captain! I am so excited you’re