By the time you read this, I'm probably gone, and I'm really sorry.
I know that saying sorry won't undo everything I've done, but what else can I do? Come back to life?

Life just doesn't work that way, Taehyun. But I wish it did.

Will you miss me? Will our band miss me? Will the fans miss me?
Probably, but I was dying, and I couldn't help it.

And here's for the truth you've wanted to know for some time.

I had leukemia, and I was slowly nearing my end. They say leukemia patients have between fifteen to twenty years life expectancy, and let's just say, I reached my twenty years.

If you do the math right, I've had it since I was three.

The bruises you found on my arms when I fainted? Leukemia. Me fainting? Leukemia. Me leaving in the middle of practice? Leukemia. And when I did, I went to see the doctor for chemotherapy sessions.

At one point, we had to stop because they no longer worked. And here we are now.

̷I̷ ̷l̷i̷k̷e̷ ̷y̷o̷u̷ I love you, and I'm sorry we couldn't say much more. But I didn't know if you had feelings for me, or if you even liked boys, so I kept to myself. When I asked you if you liked anybody, I wished it was me that you did, but it probably wasn't, right?

But that's okay, at least that someone will take care of you better than I ever will.

And now that you know the truth, the full story, let me say this one last time:

When a day comes where you miss me, remember