So yeah...we decided to throw our update schedule over board. We didn't want to keep you waiting any longer so we're updating right now

We hope you're gonna like it!

Two days had passed since Changbin’s and Felix’ breakup and the latter hadn’t spoken to anyone about it.

Sometimes he was really grateful to be the only Gryffindor left in his closer friend group. It spared him the invasive questions. Of course, he knew that he couldn’t hide out forever, but he needed some distance from everything.

He had gotten pretty good at avoiding Changbin – it was just too painful to see him after Felix had broken his heart. Even just thinking about him made a feeling of sadness mixed with his guilt bubble up in Felix’ chest.

Avoiding Hyunjin, however, was a different story.

~

“Felix!”

The Gryffindor froze at the sound of Hyunjin’s approaching voice. He was currently sitting next to the entrance of the library, trying to distract himself from his conflicting feelings by throwing himself into his favorite school subject – Charms.

He almost felt like he could apply as the new Charms professor because of how much he had studied over the last two days.

Hyunjin came to a halt next to him, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Care to explain yourself? I’ve been trying to talk to you for two days now!” Hyunjin told him, sounding very mad.

Felix sighed and got to his feet to at least be somewhat close to Hyunjin’s eye level.

“I’d rather not talk about this right now. Just punch me in the face and leave me alone,” Felix replied, trying to sound indifferent, even though he really wasn’t.

Hyunjin had become a friend to him and to see him looking at him with so much anger in his eyes wasn’t exactly the best feeling. He felt bad about making both Changbin and Hyunjin hurt like this.

“As much as I want to punch you, I’m not letting you off that easily! Last year you felt threatened by me and now that we finally got that out of the way, you go ahead and dump Changbin? What did he do to deserve that?” Hyunjin questioned, raising his voice in anger.

The librarian shot him a warning look even though they weren't even inside the library, but he really didn’t seem to care.

Felix had rarely ever seen Hyunjin look this intimidating.

“He didn’t do anything. It’s me...” Felix told him, causing the older boy’s eyes to widen.

“You didn’t cheat on him, did you?” he asked, his hands already balling into fists.

Felix quickly shook his head. “No! Of course not!” he assured him hastily and Hyunjin visibly relaxed. His features even softened the slightest bit and he let out a sigh.

“Felix... I’m mad at you for hurting Changbin. But you can still talk to me,” he replied.

Felix captured his lip between his teeth and paused, avoiding Hyunjin’s eyes.

“You wouldn’t get it... I had to break up with him...” he said.

Hyunjin’s brows furrowed. “Did someone make you? Because I’ve been there–”

“No... it was my decision...” Felix interrupted him, making Hyunjin sigh in frustration.

“You’re not making any sense right now!” he exclaimed, earning one more warning look from the librarian.

Felix had avoided this topic as best as he could for the past two days, but he figured that the only way to satisfy Hyunjin was to tell him the truth. He sighed one last time before finally looking at Hyunjin.

“It’s about Josh... you know that we dated a few years ago, right? Well, there’s a possibility I might still... like him. And I don’t want to do this to Changbin...”

Hyunjin looked at him blankly for a few seconds, needing a moment to process the situation.

“Oh, Felix...” he muttered, sounding resigned. “You better make up your mind because Changbin won’t be hung up on you forever. I won’t let him.”

Felix lowered his head. “I never meant to hurt him. I’m just confused, and I can’t be with Changbin if I might still have feelings for another guy... it wouldn’t be fair,” he tried to explain himself.

Hyunjin exhaled and a few seconds of silence passed before he spoke up again.

“Let’s just hope this is fixable... I have to go now...” Hyunjin told him, already turning to leave.

“Thanks for not punching me in the face...” the younger said and Hyunjin just shrugged.

“You have Changbin to thank for that,” he answered, before taking off.

~

“Come on, Binnie...” Hyunjin said, holding out a slice of toast to his best friend. He had to practically force some food into him, not wanting him to skip any meals. Changbin wished that Hyunjin would just leave him alone. But then again, he was glad that he didn’t.

He knew that he would be the same if Hyunjin were in his shoes.

Only that Seungmin would never break up with Hyunjin for another guy, Changbin thought bitterly. Of course, Hyunjin had told Changbin all about his encounter with Felix and his reason for dumping him.

Changbin felt stupid. He knew that this was about Josh. The way Felix had reacted to seeing him, the way he had practically forgotten all about Changbin’s existence when he was around.

It had only been a matter of time...

He just wished he would have realized sooner. He also couldn’t help but wonder... what if Changbin had just been a way for Felix to get over Josh in the first place?

They had only broken up because of Josh’s move after all. Just the thought of that caused a pain to spread in Changbin’s chest.

“Binnie, you need to stop overthinking. There’s nothing you could have done,” Hyunjin said, looking worried, almost as if he had read his mind.

Changbin took the slice of toast from Hyunjin and quickly ate it, without anything on it, just to get Hyunjin off his back for now.

“Whatever, I’m skipping today...” he said, getting up from the breakfast table and leaving his friend behind without further words.

On his way to the door, he saw Seungmin, who patted his shoulder in passing, before continuing to make his way to Hyunjin.

Changbin just headed to his dorm without looking at anyone.

~

“How’s he holding up?” Seungmin asked Hyunjin once he’d joined him at the Slytherin table.

Hyunjin still had a worried expression lingering on his face. “Not very well. He’s barely eating anything and he’s shutting everyone out,” he answered and Seungmin hummed in thought.

“I feel like this is partly my fault, too. I talked to Felix the other day, about how Josh clearly still liked him. I just wanted to help, because of what almost happened to us last year, but what if all I helped him with was making his decision to break up with Changbin?” he said, looking down to his hands, feeling incredibly guilty.

Hyunjin took one of his hands, making the younger look at him again.

“It’s not your fault, my love... this is all on Felix,” Hyunjin replied, mumbling the last part but Seungmin still heard him.

“Don’t be too hard on him. I’m sure this isn’t easy for him either,” he reasoned, squeezing Hyunjin’s hand.

The older grumbled a little bit, before leaning in to press a kiss onto his boyfriend’s cheek.

“You’re too good for this world, you know that?” he muttered, giving him a soft smile. “Don’t feel guilty about Changbin and Felix... none of us could have seen this coming...”

~

“I got mail from Jinwoo and Mina!” Jisung told Felix the next day, waving a letter around.

“Me too!” Felix answered with a small smile.

The news of Jinwoo’s and Mina’s baby and their engagement at least helped brighten up his mood a little bit. A part of him wished that he could be in London with them and Chan and Minho to figure out his feelings in peace.

“Are you alright?” Jisung asked carefully.

Felix sighed and rested his head on his friend's shoulder. He had finally told him the reason for the breakup after also explaining it to Hyunjin. Luckily, Jisung wasn’t one to judge.

“I guess we’re both single now, huh...” he stated and Jisung patted his back.

“Heh... yeah... it would appear so,” he muttered awkwardly. “But, Lix... you didn’t have to break up with Changbin right away, you know. If you’re unsure about Josh, you could have just talked to him about it,” he continued.

Felix sat up straight and looked at him.

“I couldn’t even tell him that it was because of my possible feelings for Josh,” he answered.

Jisung looked surprised. “Wait, you didn’t even tell him the reason?”

“Stop making me feel worse than I already do!” Felix whined.

“I don’t know what else to tell you,” Jisung said, putting up his hands in defense.

“Just be single with me for now, please... I feel like everybody else doesn’t understand, because they’re in a relationship. I mean, apart from Jeongin but it's not like he's got experience...”

Jisung looked a bit awkward again, but Felix figured that it was because he didn’t entirely agree with his decision. He still dropped the subject and just continued to be there for him, though, which Felix was eternally grateful for.

~

“Felix!”

Once again, Felix froze at the sound of his name, but this time it wasn’t Hyunjin who had called out to him, as he was leaving the Great Hall to head to his next class. He turned around.

“Joshua...” he said, glad that he wasn’t stuttering or anything. He didn’t exactly want Josh to know about his potential feelings for him.

Joshua Wen wasn’t an idiot, though.

“Did you break up with Changbin because of me?” he asked straightforwardly, causing

Felix’ eyes to widen. “U-um... I don’t know, I’m confused...” he admitted in a small voice.

Josh put a hand on the younger’s shoulder. “Listen, muffin, the last thing I wanted was to come between you and your boyfriend. I guess I wasn’t exactly subtle about still liking you, but this really wasn’t what I wanted...”

Felix averted his gaze, looking down at his feet. “It’s not your fault... I just need to sort things out,” he told Josh truthfully.

This felt weird. Here he was talking to Joshua, but he couldn’t even face Changbin. Well, to be fair, he hadn’t actually planned on running into Joshua.

“I-I should probably...” he trailed off, motioning in the direction of the stairs. Josh nodded and took a step back from him. “I’ll see you around,” Felix mumbled, before quickly storming off to his class, hating how flushed his cheeks were.

Joshua had always had that effect on him.

He once again thought back to the summer they met.

Joshua had been sweet, constantly making Felix blush with his charming words and cute actions. They had ended things on friendly terms, but in such a bittersweet way. Felix couldn’t help but keep wondering how things would have turned out if Josh had transferred here earlier.

But then he remembered, that despite his previous summer romances, he had always had this infatuation with Changbin. He’d felt drawn in by his mysterious, sometimes dark facade and even more so, when he had figured out that he was a soft ball of sunshine behind it.

He remembered their first date, their first misunderstanding that had ultimately led to them getting together. He remembered his first kiss with Changbin. He remembered how it had felt when he had first realized that he really loved him.

Drowning in his thoughts, Felix decided to ditch class after all and instead headed back to his dorm, figuring that he wouldn’t be able to focus anyway.

He took a seat on his bed and looked at the picture frame on his nightstand. He had turned it over after he had broken up with Changbin, but now he put it back up and looked at it again.

It was the drawing the older had made of him last year. Felix admired the detail he had put into the drawing. It was like he had counted the freckles on his face to make it look accurate.

Felix sighed and pulled out a box from under his bed. It was locked, but he quickly grabbed the key out of his nightstand drawer.

He was met with a bunch of letters; some from his family, some from his friend Stan... but he was only looking for one letter in particular...

Dear Felix

First of all, don't you dare laugh at me for writing this cheesy letter. I was forced to–

No... that's the wrong approach... I'm really not good at this...

The real reason why I'm writing this is because I've been thinking that I don't show you my emotions enough. You're always so open about your feelings for me and I love that, and I feel the same for you, but I just really at expressing it.

I... I want you to know how much I appreciate having you in my life and that I don't take you for granted and your affection for me makes my heart flutter like crazy and I just don't know what to do...

I look forward to seeing you every day and you're all I think about when I don't see you.

I've never felt about anyone like this before and I don't want you to feel like this is one sided or something because it really isn't.

I want to be close to you all the time because I'm the happiest when I'm with you. It's like I wasn't the real Changbin before I met you... like you completed me.

That's why I'm saying the least I can do for you is try to be more open and honest with you from now on because...

Because I love you... so much that I wrote this embarrassing letter...

I can't imagine being with anyone but you...

I will try harder for you, I promise...

I love you

Your Changbin

Your Binnie

Your Binniebunny

Tears were already running down Felix’ face by the time he had reached the end of the letter.

He remembered the day Changbin had given this letter to him, how he had nervously eyed Felix as he was reading the letter, anxiously waiting for his reaction.

Changbin really meant so much to him… and Felix realized just how much he’d hurt him.

He knew he didn’t deserve Changbin after what he had done, but he wasn’t sure if he could go on without him...

~

Changbin really wanted to hate Josh with every fiber of his being.

But he couldn’t, simply because the guy was so nice. Genuinely nice. He reminded Changbin of Hyunjin, too genuine and soft to even be in Slytherin, and they probably maybe would have been friends if they’d met under different circumstances.

“Hey… can I talk to you for a second?” Josh carefully questioned one evening, as Changbin was just getting ready for bed.

He had finally started regularly attending his classes again, after a week and a half. He didn’t exactly want to talk to Josh, but the pleading look, in the other Slytherin’s eyes made him sigh and motion for him to go on.

“I should have said this sooner, but I’m really sorry about stirring things up...” Josh told him, an apologetic look on his face.

Changbin didn’t really know what to say to that. He was aware that Josh hadn’t planned for this to happen either, but that didn’t change the fact that Felix had left him.

A few seconds of silence passed. Changbin wanted to say something but the words got stuck in his throat. He couldn’t help but get reminded of Felix breaking up with him whenever he looked at Josh.

So, instead, he just nodded and got into his bed without saying a word.

~

“Joshua”

Josh stopped in his tracks when Felix called out to him, looking surprised. The younger had made it his mission to sort things out as soon as he could the next morning.

Of course, he knew that Joshua had a Potions class that morning, so he decided to wait for him in front of the classroom.

“Oh, Felix, hi. Changbin isn’t here, he had to leave early to attend the prefect’s meeting,” Joshua explained with a smile.

“I know… I’m actually here to see you,”

Felix replied, trying not to look as awkward as he felt. “Oh? What is it?”

“You see, um… well, I…” Felix started before taking a deep breath, trying to organize his words. Joshua just gave him a patient smile. “What we had back in Australia was really special to me and it still is and… you’re still special to me…” he said and took another deep breath.

“But during this time off with Changbin I realized just how much I need him and… I can’t let go of him.”

“I understand, Felix,” Joshua replied as he put a hand on Felix’ shoulder.

“I’m sorry, Joshua… maybe I’m being way too dramatic about this whole thing, but I didn’t want to betray Changbin. I love him…” Felix added.

“Don’t apologize to me, Felix. You and Changbin were made for each other. I’ll be fine,” Joshua chuckled, earning a grateful smile from Felix before giving him a hug.

“Now go and apologize to Changbin. He really isn’t doing well without you. Plus, I’m scared that he’ll kill me in my sleep someday if this goes on any longer,” the older admitted, probably only half-jokingly.

Felix gave him another bright smile before heading to the dungeons.

Luck seemed to be on Felix’ side that day, since it only took him a few minutes to find Hyunjin exiting the Great Hall with Seungmin.

Hyunjin looked displeased at first but soon softened up when Felix told him about his decision and that he wanted to talk to Changbin as soon as possible. Hyunjin told him that he would handle this, and that Felix should wait in front of the Slytherin common room at 6 pm.

~

Felix was pacing back and forth in front of the Slytherin common room, feeling anxious.

What if Changbin wouldn't forgive him? Well, not that he could blame him for that... he had ed up big time.

Or what if he would forgive him but things wouldn't go back to the way they were?

What if he had ruined things between them for good?

Felix felt himself getting more and more anxious by the second. After what felt like an eternity, Felix finally heard the common room door open and turned around to see Changbin appear in front of the stone wall. He looked surprised to see Felix waiting for him instead of Hyunjin.

“This was a setup, wasn’t it,” was all he said after a pause. Felix opened his mouth to say something, but Changbin had already his heel, muttering, “I’m going back inside…”

“Wait!” Felix panicked, “Please... hear me out first,” he added hastily.

Luckily, Changbin stopped and turned back around, still looking rather weary. Felix took a deep breath.

“I’m so sorry... about everything,” Felix started as Changbin crossed his arms over his chest, scoffing.

“By everything, do you mean ripping my heart out after I finally had enough courage to give it to you, just because of an Australian beach boy you dated for six weeks?” he answered bitterly.

Ouch.

Felix nodded to himself, figuring that he did deserve that one.

“I know... I wasn’t sure if I still had lingering feelings for Joshua. I thought that if I did, it would be unfair to keep dating you. I thought that if I was going to date you, there should be no second guesses in my mind,” he explained and took a few steps closer to Changbin. The older avoided Felix’ eyes.

“I know now that I should’ve talked to you about it. I was just so overwhelmed and confused and frustrated with myself. I felt so guilty and I still do...” he added and noticed a tear running down Changbin’s face.

There was a pause until Changbin finally looked at Felix, more tears forming in his eyes.

“So, I’m supposed to just forget that you pushed me away the second your ex-boyfriend showed up? We could’ve found a way together, Felix...” Changbin said, trying to wipe away his tears, but new ones would just follow immediately.

Felix felt his eyes water as well, just from seeing Changbin like this.

“Of course not. I know I ed up, but I love you and I don’t deserve you, but... I need you to know that it’s always been you,” the younger replied, now crying as well.

Changbin looked at him for a few seconds before wordlessly shifting his gaze back to the ground. Felix took that as a sign that Changbin wasn’t going to forgive him and slowly turned to leave in defeat.

“Wait,” Changbin called out after a few painful seconds of Felix walking away. Felix immediately stopped in his tracks, almost stumbling over by how abruptly he’d stopped walking. “Never do like that again,” he heard Changbin say before he felt two arms wrap around him from behind.

“I’m still mad at you, but... I love you, so I forgive you,” the older added, letting his head rest against Felix’ back.

Felix turned around in Changbin’s arms and looked at him with widened eyes.

“Really?” he asked with his bright smile, making Changbin blush a bit.

“Yes...” he muttered.

Felix then leaned in to connect their lips, almost unable to contain his smile and pulling the other closer by the hips. After pulling away again, he let his forehead rest against Changbin’s, telling him that he was sorry and that he loved him about 10 times.

“Shut up,” Changbin replied eventually, trying hard to hide his own smile.

~

“I'm sorry, Changbin,” Felix pouted as he fed his boyfriend a grape, causing him to chuckle.

It was the next day at lunch in the Great Hall.

Hyunjin, Seungmin and Sunwoo had joined the two of them at the Slytherin table and everything seemed to have returned to normal.

“Stop apologizing, Felix, it's okay, really,” Changbin reassured him for what felt like the 20th time.

“No, I'm such an idiot,” Felix insisted, the pout still playing on his lips.

“I know, but I signed up for that,” Changbin smiled and booped Felix' nose. The younger smiled brightly before kissing him.

“Why do I feel like you two are even cheesier than before the whole breakup thing?” Hyunjin stated in a fake-disgusted tone, making Joshua, who had also joined them at the Slytherin table, laugh.

“Leave them be, I'm glad they worked it out,” he said.

Changbin pulled away from Felix and turned to Joshua. “By the way, I'm sorry for being rude to you. We had a rough start, but you're a cool guy,” he admitted.

“Don't even worry about it. Friends?” Joshua replied, holding out his hand for Changbin to shake.

“Sure, man,” he agreed and took Joshua's hand, earning them both a happy smile from Felix and a round of applause from Hyunjin.

“So, when are you gonna get yourself a boyfriend, Sunwoo?” Felix teased randomly and the group's attention shifted to Sunwoo, who almost choked on his pear juice in surprise.

Hyunjin gave Sunwoo, who'd completely stopped in his movements, an indecipherable look. He seemed more than flustered to be addressed so suddenly.

“I-I don't know, maybe when people in this school stop thinking that they'll get hurt if they get too close to me,” Sunwoo replied awkwardly.

“What, why would they think that? You seem very harmless to me,” Seungmin chuckled.

“Well, probably still because of that incident from five years ago...” Sunwoo sighed before shifting his attention back on his meal.

Seungmin furrowed his eyebrows. “Five years ago?” he asked but Hyunjin gave him a look and shook his head. Seungmin seemed confused but took the hint and didn't ask anything else.

“Well, I have to get going anyway, I still need to return this book,” Sunwoo announced, awkwardly showing them a book about the history of house elves.

“Go ahead, I’ll see you later,” Hyunjin smiled at him before Sunwoo turned to leave. Sunwoo had just made it out of the Great Hall when Jeongin came over to join the group.

“Oh, Sunwoo just left, didn’t he,” he stated as he took a seat next to Hyunjin, where Sunwoo had sat before.

“Yeah, you just missed him,” Seungmin confirmed, making Jeongin pout.

“Too bad, I wanted to say hi…” he sighed before grabbing some toast. “So, Changbin and Felix are back together, yay!” the young Hufflepuff cheered, making the couple smile at his cuteness.

“Indeed,” Changbin smiled at Felix.

“And we’re stronger than ever,” Felix replied, putting an arm around his boyfriend.

He couldn’t believe how lucky he was, but he sure as hell wasn’t complaining.