Satisfied. 
Have you ever feel satisfied ?

Have you ever feel satisfied enough, untill you stop running into something and say "Yes. I am satisfied.", then a smile appears honestly on your face and feel thankful over it.

Or instead,

You keep thinking that everything you've done is just an unperfect things, untill you forget the word satisfied.

I hope we can live like the first example.

you know...
We can feel satisfied over things we had or we did. 

Even the world say that we are not perfect, we are full of flaws, and we are just not worth it yet, but we still can smile and say 

'I am satisfied over myself.'

Can we ?

______________________________________

02 October 2018

She already waiting there, playing with her phone. The sunset makes the perfect silhouette of her perfect figure leaning on the pile. The wind blowing gently brushing through her messy tied hair. It must be a hard day they for her today, judging from her messy hair.

I don't see her smile either, she always paying attention into her surrounding to find anything that can make her smile. It is rare to see her plastering her eyes to the gadget.

My sense can strongly feel her bad mood. I think about something that could brighten up her rest of the day. I look to my back seat, if i still had the bag of chocolate my bro gave me yesterday. 

I threw some of things away from the seat and found the chocolate under my jacket. I took some pieces of it, then i made an envelope from my sketch book and put the chocolates in it. I drew her face and a 'Cheer up Minari !'.

"perfect !" i feel satisfied, and getting ready to get down from my car and pick her up.

I walk calmly, while my heart feeling so nervous towards her. 
What if i failed to cheer her up ?
What if she hates me instead giving me her gummy smile ?

I reach her after a short but feels like hell walk. She didn't notice me at all. Her gaze is still locked on her phone like she can't hear or see anything else 

I collect all my courage to ask her first.

"Something hot on the news ?"

She was shocked, and almost dropped her phone. I chuckled seeing her being so flustered like that.

"Relax... I wont tell aunty myoui." 

"Tell mom what ?" she raised her volume, and she look really pissed right now.

"I don't know. Maybe you were watching those 'hot videos' before i came ?"

" WHAT CHAENG ?!" 

She is angry, but she needs to be angry for her to let go all her burden. She is an introvert person, she wont tell anyone about her problem. But i learn her, for a long time, and the only way to make her share her problem to someone is to make her anger explodes first.

"Chill mina. I know you will never watch that kind of things. I just wont tell aunty that her favourite penguin was being upset because of something"

After i finish my sentence her pupils start to shrink and slowly back to the normal minari.

"I hate you." she said with a more calm tone.

"Chocolate ?" i hand her the envelope. She peek, and reaching out for the envelope.

"You know the password for this chocolate." i pull my hand away, and my eyebrow raised to make my sly expression.

"You are not intimidating chaeng. But here..." 

Then she smile her widest smile, showing her antique gummy smile that is prettier than the sunset behind us.

"See.. You look better with a smile."

"Whatever.. But thx chaeng." she rolled her eyes before thankingg me, her mood can be such a rollecrcoaster sometimes. 

"Anytime." 

We both keeping our silent, enjoying the sunset. I can hear her gentle chewing sound, she likes the chocolate, that is a relief to me.

Then i start a conversation to dig out about what is the problem that could make her mood down today.

"So... How was it ?" i ask.

"Just."

"Just what ?"

She sighed.

"Just what ?"

"Just don't ask me ab