4. Let Go

Let Go is probably one of the hardest things to do.

Then...

Why is it hard for people to let go ?

There would be an enormous choices that could be the answer of this question but,

the root of all the choices would be... 

Worries.

The worries we had when we are in the position to let go of something important for us. The risk and all the bad possibility that can occured when we decide to let go of that something.

The thing is... 
We might forgot that beside all those worries and bad things that could happen there always be a good things that also can happen.

It could be an even better than we had now.

We should try to learn how to let go and believe that not just all the bad things could happen after it,

But maybe..

It is something even better than we never expect it would be.

_______________________________________
21 December 2018

"Here... Mina's special hot chocolate with lot of sweet wishes and magical ingredients just for you." 
Her slender arms with her hands cupping tight the white cup offering me the 'Mina's special hot chocolate'.

"What kind of magical ingredients that you add huh ?"

"Something that would turns me into a frog or something ?" i raised my eyebrow making a suspicious questioning face.

"No.. But even if you'll turn into a frog it would be the smallest and the cutest frog and i will keep you."
She answer it casually with her smile keeps being attached on her beautiful face.

"Whatever mina. But thanks for the chocolate. Let me try..."

I took a sip with all high expectation, 
And...

"How is it ? Isn't it the best hot chocolate you ever try ?" 

"Hmm... Should i say the truth or..."

"Whatever chaeng, it must be the best hot chocolate you ever had cuz i made that with a mind thinking about the most important person in my life currently." she pouts.

"Your mom must be proud of y..."

"Chaeng ! It is not funny ! You know it is not mom..." she yelled with her eyes rolled up.

We stare to each other eyes for a couple of second before we both burst out laughing over our sillines.

"But remember she will always be your mom, and she is the one who raised you untill now mina."

"Yeah.. Yeah.. Noted that miss son chaeyoung." 

"Good.. And.. Thanks by the way for the chocolate mina." i said sincerly.

"Your welcome, but i want to thank you first for always being there for me, chaeng." 

My heart skipped a beat when i heard it. I want to look at her eyes deeply after her words but it would be very awkward.

*flashback*

Back to the night where i found her crying alone under the lamp post. 

It was also the night that i almost ruin my friendship with mina, when i dare myself to speak all the words that were kept hidden in the deepest part of my heart.

"You are always the first thing i remember when i open my eyes each and every morning."

"And you are also the last thing i think about right before i close my eyes each and every night."

"You are important for me mina. Actually you are special for me."

She stop crying and land her sight to my eyes. I looked away cause i'm afraid that i went too far with my words.

"Really chaeng ?"

"Am i that special for you ?"

I nod my head cause i don't want her to wait for my answer again. 

I sigh, waiting her anger explode for the second time this night. I was also preparing myself to get beaten by her.

But...

All i get was just a thight hug from her.

She wrapped her arms around me and holding me with her head rested on my shoulder like i am the only thing that she has left in this world.

"Thank you, chaeng."

"Mina i..."

"Thank you my bestfriend."

And by that i stopped all my intention and shutted my mouth to say anything except..

"Your welcome, mina. You were and always be my bestest friend."

With a heart full of mixed feelings, a good and relief feelings when mina wasn't mad at me, but also a slight sad feelings that mina were always looked at me just as her bestfriend.

But afterall, i can't tell someone's heart what to feel. It is their choice and it is enough for me to always be by her side even though i only can be her bestfriend and not more.

*end of flashback*

"What movie should we watch ?" she asked me while digging to her movies collection.

I was sitting on the couch, looking at her back. She wears the sweater i gave her yesterday cause i told her to. She looks really cute in that fluffy white sweater. 

With her messy buns and her no make up face, she looks so pretty and innocent. 

"Titanic ? Wreck it ralph ? Harry potter maybe ?" 

I just smile looking at her enthusiasm on choosing the movie.

She squint her eyes, pouting her cute little lips potraying her annoyed mood after my silent smile.

"I'm asking, chaeng."

"How about...." i said.

"Come here first, just put down all the CDs and sit beside me. I had a story to tell you." i patted the empty space beside me. 

She sigh but doing all the things i