“Ehem...” Suho cleared his throat after an awkwardly long time, but this time the awkwardness was all Kai‘s fault. He was still clinging to Suho like his life depended on it, because it actually did. He hugged him tighter than any being had ever hugged before, and refused to let go. Boa constrictors had nothing on him. He had missed Suho so deeply and desperately. It hit him the hardest that he had almost forgotten how Suho smelled, even though it was his favorite smell in the whole wide world. He longed to breathe him in with every breath he took, for the rest of his life. And hopefully longer.

"Kai... Kai! I can‘t breathe.“ Suho chuckled. He didn‘t sound angry at all. It gave Kai the courage to let go. Yet, the moment he released Suho from his clutches, he immediately regretted it. Suho‘s warmth dissipated all too soon, leaving his arms cold and lonely.

"Aren‘t you going to invite me out to dinner to celebrate?“ Kai said with overconfident sass. "It would be rude not to, I just graduated!!“ Kai added a pout for emphasis. He was not taking no for an answer.

"Uhh.. don‘t you need to get back to your friends... isn‘t there an after-party of some sorts? It seemed like you‘d be missed by a lot of people.“ Suho said dryly and pointed in the direction of the theater. Kai couldn‘t figure out whether Suho was actually trying to get rid of him or if he was just jealous. Either way, Kai had no intention of backing down.

"There‘s no place I‘d rather be than here with you.“ Kai said with soft sincerity, looking Suho right in the eyes to show him just how much he meant it.

Suho coughed.

"Well, come on then..“ he said, clearing his throat and avoiding eye contact at all costs. It was the cutest, most awkward thing Kai had ever seen.

It was almost as if they had never been apart. They talked about everything and nothing over an extravagant feast, laughing and giggling and being silly, having the best time. Kai hadn't realized how much he had missed Suho's dorky laugh. He didn't want the evening to end, so he nagged Suho into going to see a movie after dinner.

Like the perfect gentleman, Suho paid for both the tickets and the snacks and carried their drinks and popcorn into the theater. Kai's insides fluttered as they entered the dimly lit room. Their seats were in the back row, far from the other cinema goers who were scattered throughout the theater. The film had been playing for a while, so there weren't that many people. Kai had just selected a movie at random, the one that started the soonest, since it wasn't the movie he was after.

Kai had concocted the perfect scheme. He had made sure they got only one tub of popcorn to share, so when Suho's hand entered the popcorn box, Kai was going to dive in right after him, so their hands would inevitably touch. And then Kai was going to grab Suho's hand, so Suho would realize that it was no different from holding Kaya's hand, and they would live happily ever after. His plan was bulletproof, it couldn't fail.

Kai placed the popcorn on the armrest, and waited.

And waited.

But Suho wasn't eating any popcorn. Desperate, Kai pushed the box towards Suho, but he declined, saying he was way too full from dinner. Agh! All was ruined. Frustrated, Kai grabbed the box and drowned himself in popcorn, eating the whole thing before the movie even started.

Then he noticed that Suho had put his arm on the armrest between them. Kai's heart skipped a beat. He tried swallowing the lump that had suddenly appeared in his throat without success, mustering up enough courage to slowly, quietly place his hand on the armrest beside Suho's. He held his breath for only a second, and then Suho reclaimed his arm, subtly avoiding any contact with him. Kai sighed heavily, his heart sinking to the bottom of his gut, getting stuck in a pit of sticky tar.

Instead of giving in to the hopelessness, Kai persevered. He stubbornly kept his arm on the armrest, pretending to be watching the movie, while his thoughts were consumed by darkness. He tried to wash some of the black tar off his heart, but it was too sticky, refusing to release it from its clutches.

Then the most unexpected thing happened. Casually, as if it was no big deal, Suho put his arm on the armrest again. Kai froze. Was it just a coincidence or was it a sign? Was Suho reaching out, or was he just engrossed in the movie, unaware of his surroundings? Even though the armrests weren't that wide, there was a deliberate gap between their arms. Kai was determined to bridge that gap, if it was the last thing he did.

He knew he had to be smart about it. He couldn't afford to spook Suho again, causing him to run away. Kai bit his lip as he edged his hand closer and closer to Suho's, one nanometer at a time. To the eye, there was no detectable movement, but very slowly, the gap was disappearing. Kai's heart was beating so loudly, he was having a hard time concentrating. Still, he marched on. The slowest march in the history of the planet.

He didn't stop until the edge of his pinky finger softly grazed the edge of Suho's. Holding his breath, Kai anxiously waited for Suho to jerk his hand away, but nothing happened. Was Suho too engrossed in the movie to feel their pinkie connection? No, it couldn't be. Or could it? Kai remained frozen, not daring to move. Every muscle in his body was tense and on alert. All of his senses were heightened, ready to detect even the most minuscule change in Suho's demeanor.

Kai's lungs screamed for oxygen. He wasn't sure how long he had stayed motionless like this, but his overly tense muscles were starting to complain. Amidst a cloud of thoughts, a vague message from his pinkie cut through. It had detected something, the sensation sending a wave of goose bumps up his arm. Without warning, Suho's little finger had sprung up and locked itself around Kai's pinkie. Kai gasped, his lungs rejoicing as the long awaited oxygen came rushing in.

He tried to keep his cool, at least on the surface, he didn't want to scare Suho off. He looked out the corner of his eye, confirming that Suho's little finger was indeed wrapped around his. His heart started pounding a hole through his chest, probably wanting to personally confirm this out of the blue miracle for itself. Kai pretended to be intensely invested in what was happening in the movie, trying not to hyperventilate. Luckily, it was a fast action scene so he could pretend to be excited about the dramatic car chase while his insides melted into red hot lava, fueling the furnaces that had replaced his cheeks. He felt like he could erupt at any moment. The flammable mix of feelings that were swirling around inside of him were threatening to self combust.

The movie ended and Kai prepared himself for the disappointment when Suho would reclaim his pinky finger. Instead, as Suho stood up, his pinkie wound itself tighter around Kai's. He was definitely not letting go. Kai swooned, the tears eagerly lining up in the tear ducts. He held back. He didn't want to make Suho uncomfortable by bawling over something so insignificant. But it wasn't insignificant. Not to Kai. To Kai, this tiny little gesture was everything. It was his lifeline. It was his hope restored.

And their pinkies stayed linked until they got to the car, where they unavoidably went their separate ways, to the opposite sides of the vehicle. Kai entered the car quickly, wanting to lock their little fingers together once more as they got inside, and, luck permitting, perhaps the other fingers would be allowed to join the fun. But it was impossible. Suho's squareness was standing in the way, as he kept his hands on the steering wheel in the 10 and 2 position at all times. Such an annoyingly proper driver.

Suho's phone lit up as it vibrated on the dashboard. Suho had gotten a message. Kai stared at it. Or, not at the message, but at the phone's background photo. It was one of the pout selfies Kai had sent him when he was trying to convince him to come to the performance. Kai died right then and there. At least it was a happy death. Like a flash, Suho's hand left its precious 2 position to turn off the screen on the phone. Suho cleared his throat awkwardly. Kai couldn't keep it all in any longer, a huge smile burst out and took over his entire face.

The moment they came to a halt in front of Kai's apartment building, Suho jumped out of the car.

“My lady...” he said in an old-fashioned manner as he opened the door for Kai and reached out his hand.

“Oh!!” Suho suddenly exclaimed, grabbing his mouth. “Or.. uh... uhm... I don't know... I don't know what to call you now.” he added, his face turning into a tomato.

“Should I not do things like this anymore? I mean... you're not a girl...” he wrinkled his eyebrows, clearly having a hard time figuring out what was the appropriate thing to do in a situation like this.

“No!! No, no... I want you to!! I like it!” Kai sent him a warm smile. “You don't have to treat me any different, I'm still your princess.. it's just that your princess happens to be able to grow a beard... or ...not really, just a few strands.” he chuckled awkwardly.

Suho stretched his hand out again, helping Kai out of the car. But his hand didn't let go and held on to Kai's all the way to the entrance.

“You know, if you were going to me to my door... This is technically not my door.” Kai brattily pointed out, hoping Suho wouldn't let go of his hand just yet.

Suho chuckled, leading the way into the building.

The elevator ride was silent, but the silence was tangible. There was so much hiding inside that intense silence, so many things left unsaid.

As they arrived in front of Kai's actual door, and there were no more doors to use as an excuse, they just stood there for the longest time, silently looking into each other's eyes. Finally, after a very comprehensive internal search, Kai found the courage to slowly lean in. Suho seemed to realize what was happening and closed his eyes. Kai's stomach churned. Suho wasn't pulling back or avoiding him. He just stood there with his eyes closed, waiting for him to kiss him. In the brief moment that it took Kai's lips to reach Suho's, Kai marveled at how exceptionally handsome Suho was. He really was his real life prince charming.

Their lips locked together, millions of fluttering butterflies causing utter chaos inside Kai's gut. Not only did Suho not run away, but he actively participated in the kiss. He was kissing him back! Their first kiss, as Suho and Kai. A new beginning.

Before Suho opened his eyes, a nearly inaudible whisper escaped his lips.

“Kaya.”.

It was as if Suho had punched through Kai's ribcage, grabbed his bloody, raw heart in his hand and squished it, hard. Kai tried to ignore the pain. He had gotten Suho back. That was all that mattered.