Jeonghan is on his deep slumber while the train he's boarding on is on it's way to Busan.

He took the earliest ride as much as possible.. He's leaving..


 

No one knows he is.
 

Not Vernon, not Seungkwan, not Joshua..

He felt hot liquid stream down on his face again..

It's not for Seungcheol anymore..

It's for the the man who's voice is currently invading the train he is in rigjt now because his song is now playing on the radio.

He left without saying goodbye.

He left not leaving anything.. Not a letter not a word.

Remembering what happened last night is such a beautiful nightmare..

He don't want to end up using Joshua.. He don't want to hurt him.. Not when the guy love him.. Or so he say.

"Im sorry Jisoo.."

He mumbled as he reject the incoming call from the other and turned off his phone.

"Trust me Han.."

He remembered those words as it echoed on his mind.

"I do trust you Jisoo.. but I don't trust myself.."

 

FLASHBACK ****

He woke up feeling a heavy arm on his waist and extra weight on his legs.

As hot breaths is blown on his neck and warm body on his back.

He remembered what happened.
What they did.. Yes It felt right.

But it's wrong.  Base on what he did.. He felt guilt crept in because he feel like he's making Joshua a rebound

And he hate it..

He take look on the clock..

3:30 am.

Without hesitation he precautiously escape from Joshua's arms and warm.

Wear his own fabrics and grab all his things.. He also took the band Jisoo gave him.

"Im sorry Joshua.. I don't want to hurt you.. I need time. Im sorry."

He whispered as tears fell from his eyes again.

He went home catching a cab to take him back to his place..

Immediately pack some things he need and took the earliest ride.

He has no intention of telling him.. Not now that he need space.

--------------------------------------






 

"Jeonghan hyung?"

Seokmin asked as he open the door of their house after hearing knocks on his door.

"Hey.. How are --

"Hyung!!!"

He didn't finish his greeting because Seokmin and his brother dive into him and squeeze him in a longing hug.

He gave them giggles.. He missed them too.

"We miss you hyung.. So much."

Chan mumbled..

"Really? I don't miss you though.."

He answered teasing his cousins..

The two pulled back glaring at him while pouting.

"How could you?"

Seokmin said dramatically while having a crying baby face while clutching his chest.

"I miss you guys.. Im sorry for not visiting.. Im.. You know.. Busy."

"Yeah yeah whatever. Let's just get you inside before you catch cold here outside."

Seokmin said as Chan held him inside.

Drowsiness drive on his nerves so he choosed to lie down on the couch.

"Hyung.. You want some coffee?"

"No thanks Chan.. I need some rest.. Give me an hour then we'll have a talk.. Thanks."

Chan recognized the tiredness on his Hyung's voice so he smiled and walk to his room and lend some blanket for his older cousin.

The angel immediately fell on his deep slumber.



 

Seokmin prepared food while Chan settle the plates.

"He look so stressed out.. "

Chan started.

They both sighed. Guilty for not being there when Jeonghan needed them the most.

"I feel so useless as his cousin.."

The older said.

"We'll be here for him this time hyung.."

Seokmin smiled and ruffled his brother's hair.

"Wake him up.. Let's have our lunch before it cools down."







 

"Joshua hyung.. What a surprise? Why a sudden visit?"

Seungkwan with his enthusiastic voice asked when he opened the door for Joshua.

"Hey.. Uhm."

"Let's get inside.. VERNON! WE HAVE A VISITOR BRING SOME SNACKS!!"

"Coming babe!!"

Seungkwan offered a seat as he also seat from the opposite side of the couch.

"Uhm.. Seungkwan I want to ask you something.. That's why I came here."

"What is it?"

Vernon butted in placing the snacks on the desk.

"It's about Jeonghan---

"You know him? Oh my gosh.. How?"

Surprised. Seungkwan asked. Vernon is also curious on how he knew Jeonghan.

"A-actually we we're together the other day on Seungcheol's wedding.. Aren't you invited?"

"We were but we don't want to.. We hate him. It's not like we don't care about the situation he is in.. but he should have been honest to Jeonghan hyung.."

Vernon replied.

Joshua nodded agreeing.. They have a point.. but Joshua's uneasiness haven't subside yet.

"I.. I've been trying to contact him since yesterday but his phone is off.
I can't even track it."

The couple shared the same look.

"What happened?"

Seungkwan asked.

"It's my fault.. I shouldn't have rushed him.."

 

"Mind telling us what's happening between you two hyung?"

Vernon is getting eager to know.

"It's a long story.."

"We have a lot of time to listen.. "

Seungkwan replied as he sip down on his coffee.

So Joshua has no choice but to tell the couple all the things they want to know.


 

"You're whipped man.. "

Vernon casually said but sighed because of the present situation his friend and this man in front of him is in right now.

"And you fell so hard.."

Seungkwan add.

"He's scared.. He needs time.
Maybe you should give him some space for a while."

"We want to say Thank you though.. We weren't there when he really needs us.. We're too busy pursuing our dream not realizing we left him behind."

Guilt wrap their surrounding..

"I miss him already."

"Us too."



















 

"Hyung! Get up! Don't be so lazy.. Let's go down already.. Seokmin hyung is getting angry."

"Five minutes.. Please let me sleep."

Jeonghan answered half asleep.

"Hyung.. We already gave you an hour extention. It's Seokmin's birthday today and if you won't get up already.. He'll kick you back to soul I swear."


 

"Fine.. Get out of my room already. I'll go wash myself and tell Seokmin to wait patiently."

He said as he scratch his head.

Feeling foreign texture because of his new hairstyle which is bob cut and dyed it purely black.

"Yeah.. You always say that. For five months you're here with us there's not even once you wake up before us."

"I know.. Now get out before I doze off to sleep again."

"Hmp! Hyung.. Make sure to wear your best today or else I'll cut your bob cut hair to it's roots. Seokmin's Formal party is no joke. Our dear voice lesson instructor is excited."

Jeonghan smiled when Chan get out from his room.

It's Seokmin's birthday and for the first time he's there to attend the party his cousin's students prepared for them.

Five months..

More than enough.
 

He figured it out already.
His cousins gave him a lot of help overcoming his depression.

They played the most important role in his stressed life.

Doing everything to keep him smile.
Singing and dancing to destruct him whenever he's frowning.

Specially when he's watching Tv.
Every moment Joshua's face is on the screen he'll shed a tear of guilt.

He love the guy. He was just scared because he know his love for Seungcheol is still superior.

Joshua stopped messaging him.
It's been months since his last message saying 'I love you' on it.

He kept the black hair band Joshua gave him. Wearing it on his wrist as if it's a bracelet.

"HYUUUUUNG!!! WE'LL BE LATE IM TELLING YOUUU!!"

Jeonghan jolted and rushed as fast as he can. It's not good to activate his youngest cousin's beast mode.

















 

The party is the happiest party Jeonghan has ever attended.

The other instructors on the field are people with full of sense of humor that even a sentence with a weird meaning makes them laugh out the hell of them.

Drinks are everywhere.. Drowning theirselves on the happiness they are feeling at the moment.

Until all of them doze off.










 

They all end up on Seokmin's house.
Together with his crazy friends.

"Jihoon.. Please hand me the remote."

Hoshi said.. Jihoon glared at him.

"Hoshi.. Why don't you turn the Tv on yourself. You've been pestering me since yesterday."

"Aww.. Jihoon baby don't be mad. I was just trying to make you happy.."

"Yeah.. Let me kill you now and I'll throw a party for your funeral to prove my happiness."

"Bad baby. Bad-- Ouch!! That hurts!"

"Good to hear that."

Jihoon said smirking because he throw the remote on Hoshi's head.

The others just laugh at it and let them kill themselves.

On the other hand Chan turned the tv on.. Seokmin sat down beside him and Jeonghan was about to go to his room but stood frozen when he heard the news on the Tv.
 

"..the said Singer is on the hospital on the meantime after the said accident that happened yesterday. The witnesses of the car collision said that the singer Joshua Hong is showering on his own blood when they saw him.

Critical. People are still waiting for the latest health up----




 

"Hyung are you ok?"

He can't speak. All he can hear is his heartbeat palpitating, beating out like it's jumping out of his chest.

His tears betrayed him.

I don't want to lose him. Not now.

He was ready to go back but this happened.

"Hyung.. You're getting pale. Your hands are cold. What's happening--
 

"Hyung where are you going?!"

 

They all shouted as he ran to get his things and left without a word leaving his cousin and their friends clueless.














 

Running on the hallway of the said Hospital.. Ignoring all the stares people are giving him.

"Excuse me.. Where is Jisoo's room?"

He asked the nurse receptionist.

"Jisoo?-

"Oh.. I mean Joshua.. Joshua Hong."

"Are you a relative Miss?"

"Im.. --

"Jeonghan? Oh my.. Is that you?"

He heared Shin Ah's voice and turned around to face her.

"Hey.."

Shin Ah then came to embrace him when she see his lips quivering as it gets paler.

Seungcheol talked to the receptionist and that's when they proceed to Joshua's room.




 

"Mrs. Hong.. "

Seungcheol called the woman sitting outside the said room.

She looks exactly like Joshua..

Their eyes.. Nose.. Lips.

A carbon copy of his mother indeed.

"Honey? Who are they?"

A man came out from the room and came beside his crying wife.

"Good afternoon sir.. We're Joshua's friend.. How is he?"

Shin Ah introduced themselves.



 

Seungcheol on the other hand is supporting Jeonghan's weight the moment they saw the singer's state.


 

"C-can I talk to him?"

 

The two couple behind him look at each other and decided to give them privacy.

When he heard the door closed..
He then bend down on his knees.

Crying beside Joshua's unconscious body with casts on him.

With shaky breath he managed to say..
 

"H-hey.. J-jisoo.. How- how are you?"

He cried more..  Knowing his question only meant him pain.

"Im.. Im here now already. Don't worry.. I won't force you to wake up just make sure you will. Please."

"Jisoo don't leave me like what they did. I know it's selfish of me to ask something I already did to you. I was just scared.. but now Im more scared to lose you.."

"Not now please.. Not now. Not when I love you this much. I can't.. losing you will be the death of me. Remember when you stop me from escaping this world's cruelty? You've been my hope since then Jisoo.."

"You've been there when no one's left.
Call me selfish and all but I don't care.

I don't care how long I will wait just promise me you'll wake up."
 

Sobs filled the room.

Joshua's parents came in together with the couple behind them.

They came to aid the crying angel who's knees are on the floor.










 

But their world crumbled down the moment they heared the long beeping sound as the line indicating Joshua's life went flat.

It went flat..

Cries.. Shouts of grief are on the air.

Doctors and nurses came in running rumaging the room as they were sent out of the room.



 

Jeonghan who is lost in the moment is just sitting in the corner. Not hearing anything but the beeping sound that echoed repeatedly on his mind.

His breath is hitching on the thought of losing Joshua. He trembled and feel numb and dense..

"Jeonghan?"

He's losing it. He felt himself falling down hearing fading voices..

"Jeonghan!"

He fell down..





 

Jeonghan felt a stinging slap on his face.. And a shout to him so loud..


 

"YOON JEONGHAN!!!!! WAKE UP!!!"

 

Jihoon shouted.

They were all awake already still having a hang over but was startled the moment they saw Jeonghan trembling on the couch.
 

He's crying while eyes closed.

Uttering things and Joshua's name.

So they wake him up.

Ending up slapping his face because he won't budge.

"Now you're awake.. What the hyung.. We've been shaking the hell out of you yet you're still crying.."


 

Jeonghan was just quiet.
They are waiting for his response but it seems like he's running out of words.

"Your sweats are cold. You even shout someone's name.. If Im not mistaken.. It's Jisoo.."

Chan said.

That was when Jeonghan trembled again.. Remembering his dream or more like nightmare.


 

"I'll go back to Seoul tomorrow.."
 

They fell silent at the sudden statement.

"Why so sudden?"

Seokmin asked but only tears answered them and they didn't bother to speak again.



















 

Joshua is on his casual disguise wear while having a stroll around the city.

Still thinking about the same person that he's been waiting to come back.

He stopped sending him message but that doesn't mean he did gave up.

He just think that he might pressure the pretty male with his action.

He's still blaming himself why Jeonghan drift away from him.

He spent the whole day strolling around and end up on a very familiar place..

The bridge.





 

He was just standing at the same spot where he saved Jeonghan before.

Where everything started.

Sighing for the nth time.. He smiled painfully.

"Please come back Han.."





















 

Joshua decided to go home.

Feeling down as ever..

He's about to cross the pedestrian lane but the stop light caught him..

So he stayed there.. Waiting..

He's standing on the exact place where he pulled Jeonghan before.
 

Shaking his head as he cross the said lane. He notice someone is following him. So he slowed down and look behind him.

Sparing a glance from the girl behind him who's hair is pure black and short.

The girl stopped and was about to speak when he continued walking not sparing another seconds to look out again.


 

With the said girl following behind him.. He managed to get home..

Walking immediately to get inside his unit.. But then before he could have the chance to close the door a hand stopped it.




 

"Rude.."
 

The same girl behind him earlier said.

"What do you----

Joshua stopped as he recognize the person in front of him.

 

"Jeonghan?"


 

"I thought you don't know me anymore.. I was about to cry already."

About to cry.. but his tears are already flooding his eyes..

Joshua is still stiffed standing in front of his angel. He forgot to breath for a while but the moment he heard sobs from his angel..

He knew it's real. He is not dreaming and Jeonghan is in front of him right now..







 

"Jisoo Im so---

Just before Jeonghan can speak again Joshua didn't waste another second and lift him up and lock the door using his free hand..











 

No words are spoken. 

They let their body do the work to show their affection for each other...


 

"You're mine now.. "
 

"Are you asking me or what?"


 

"That's a statement Yoon Jeonghan..
You are mine as I am yours."


 

"Is that so?"






 

Joshua smiled. Kissed his muse until he's hovering above his Angel.

Pampering his face with sweet kisses.. From his forehead to his nose and to his plum lips.

"I love you Han.. More than anything."


 

"I can't disagree to that Mr. Hong.  I love you too.. I don't know how to thank you enough but I'll make sure to love you."


 

"You know what? I prefer kissing than talking.."
 

They giggled as they leaned closer for a more passionate kiss..

















 

Again.. They fly without wings towards heaven..












 

-------------------







 

RUUUUUUUUUUSSSSHHH!!!
 

IM SORRY AND THANK YOU!!!!