Long chapters coming up! Thank you for those who actually read my story!

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Jisoo went back to her dorm and found herself alone. Apparently, her members were all out eating dinner with their other manager because Jisoo received a text from Jennie asking if she wanted fried chicken for dinner. Of course I want it, it's chicken, Jennie-yah, she smiled when she texted her bestfriend back.

She went straight to take a shower, sweaty from the long hours of practice. After she practiced in JYP, she went back to YG studio to practice her individual part as well as the group dance. In the end, she was told to dance to Ariana Grande's song "Side to Side" and much to her dismay, the dance was really y. Jisoo was a bit worried if she couldn't pull it off, since she was not that comfortable in showing her y side to the audience. Ironically, being part of BlackPink meant she had to be confident expressing herself in a badass, elite way. Their choice of stage outfit tend to be fancy and y, almost experimental, rather than cute or casual. But to dance alone on stage...

No, Jisoo. You should stop thinking like this. You're BlackPink now. You can't let your members and fans down, she mentally scolded herself. She stepped in the bathroom and took off her clothes. When she was sure that the water temperature was just right, she stepped in under the shower. Humming her favorite song at that moment, she stayed under the warm water. Feeling the warm water as if it would heal her tired muscle, a comfort for working hard. The warm water drizzled on her shoulder, massaging her stiff muscle. She closed her eyes. As much as she liked having her members around, sometimes she wanted moments like this. A moment where she could be herself, a moment to stop smiling for the world. Now, the focus was all on her.

She thought about everything that had happened around her for the past few months. After her debut, things happened so fast that she almost couldn't catch up. Schedule after schedule, practice after practice. Not a single second went by without manager-unnie by her side, telling her to do this and that. It was almost controlling. She couldn't use her phone as freely as she wanted to, she couldn't use her phone so often in public. She had to keep her back straight everytime she walked or sat; she had to smile, or at least act elegant. She should never show how tired she was, or how sick she was on that day. The reality of being an idol.

It's funny. Look where I am right now. And I had always thought that I would debut as an actress, she reminisced the days when she practiced lines after lines, crying or laughing on camera. Or when she was chosen to film many CFs or appeared in MVs. She liked acting, she was really good at it. She could cry on cue, she could be mad or crazy in front of the camera. It was fun, it was thrilling.

But she stood here in a world of music and singing and dancing, in a field she was not that confident at. Of course she admitted that she could sing. In fact, her voice was stable and powerful. Dancing, though, was a whole different story. She was a foreigner in that world.

At least, there's still part in becoming an idol where I have to act happy all the time.

Jisoo admired Jennie for having a natural resting face because she honestly couldn't do it. Jennie's RBF was chic, it would not offend anybody. Hers, however, would make people think that she was mad. That's why she need to control her facial expression everywhere she go.

I don't regret this, though. Jisoo smiled to herself. Becoming an idol might not be her initial goal but it was definitely a wonderful thing. She met her new family now; bestfriends who became sisters. They went through difficulties together and they would miss each other when they were apart. Jisoo met new friends along the way, too, like Red Velvet's Seulgi. It was fun, and she got to act silly and fun, releasing all her stress, in variety shows.

"Yeah, there's nothing to regret," she said while scrubbing her arms with body soap.

She took another 20 minutes before she finally went out from the shower. She wiped her body with a towel and put on a warm sweater and a comfortable short pants. She let her hair dry on its own.

Now, what should I do. From afar, Dalgom came to her. She played with her dog for a while until she got bored. Then, Jisoo thought about going on V-Live so she took her phone but when she unlocked her phone, she saw some messages from KakaoTalk, coming from the Inkigayo MC group chat. She unconsciously smiled.

Kim Doyoung (3:34PM):
Thank you once again, hyung, noona!

P. Jinyoung (4:03PM):
Happy birthday once again, maknae-ah!

Kim Doyoung (4:20PM):
Thank you so much, hyung. I really like the cheesecake!

Jisoo (6:11PM):
Don't mention it, Doyoung-ie. I am changing your name on my phone to baby bunnie maknae~ ㅋㅋㅋ

Kim Doyoung (6:13PM):
Whatever you say, noona! ㅋㅋㅋ

Jisoo smiled, it seemed that Doyoung really like to play on his phone because he replied so fast. Jinyoung, on the other hand, gave the slowest response out of the three of them. Wait, no, I'm the slowest, but I was practicing so that didn't count.

Jisoo was typing something on the phone when suddenly her phone vibrated. Jinyoung replied.

P. Jinyoung (6:14PM):
In that case, I will change your name to 'our magnae-ing'. Kyeopta~ ㅋㅋㅋ. And you're welcome about the cake. I love sweet potato cake, btw.

Kim Doyoung (6:14PM):
Hyung, I sent the text 3 hours ago ㅋㅋ! Okay! I'll remember that when your birthday comes! ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

Jisoo laughed this time. Doyoung was the maknae, indeed. The way he texted was too cute. Jisoo typed and really sent a message this time.

Jisoo (6:15PM):
Doyoung-ie, how come you can play your phone anytime you want? Aren't you supposed to practice for our first debut as MC? ㅋㅋㅋ

Not to forget, she sent a sticker. Doyoung sent a sticker back.

Kim Doyoung (6:15PM):
I will practice the dance tomorrow! Today I just had a photoshoot woo-hoo! Jinjido fighting! See you on Sunday, hyung, noona! I will learn the dance well since I have Jinyoung-hyung video with me. ㅋㅋㅋ

P. Jinyoung (6:16PM):
ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ Make sure to delete it after we finish the broadcast!

Kim Doyoung (6:16PM):
Never!

Jisoo laughed out loud. They just met for one day but Jinyoung and Doyoung had been teasing each other comfortably. Finally, more idol friends! Jisoo held her phone in front of her chest as she threw herself onto the bed. She had to hold in the excitement inside her heart for she couldn't wait until Sunday.

~

Today was the broadcast day. It was only 6AM but Jinyoung was already at SBS Inkigayo studio to rehearse their Special MC Stage. He and Doyoung had just finished their makeup and hair done and now they were waiting for Jisoo since they had to rehearse the dance together. Both of them were in the waiting room, left alone by the staffs and managers.

"Hyung," Doyoung called Jinyoung, starting a conversation. His voice was still a bit raspy, and Jinyoung could tell that Doyoung was still a bit sleepy.

"Jisoo-noona is so pretty, isn't she?"

Jinyoung raised one eyebrow, confused at his question but he was somehow amused at the same time.

"Why so suddenly?"

Doyoung shrugged but he smiled, "I'm just asking for...well, how about I rephrase my question. Do you think Jisoo-noona is SM-style pretty? I saw many girls like her in my company. I'm a bit surprise that she is from YG."

Jinyoung tried to process Doyoung's statement. He was silent for a moment, trying to think how to reply until Doyoung started, "but something about her is different, right hyung?"

Jinyoung stared at his dongsaeng for a while. He didn't know what to say so he just nodded. Doyoung seemed a bit disappointed by his lack of reaction. Jinyoung yawned, signaling Doyoung that he was sleepy and he was not up for a conversation. As if he understood, Doyoung walked towards the sofa and laid down to snooze.

10 minutes went by, Doyoung was already deep into his nap and Jinyoung was reading a book when their managers came rushing in, telling them to go.

"What about Jisoo-ssi?" Jinyoung asked.

"She is already in the broadcast studio. Let's go, we are a little bit behind the schedule."

When he arrived, Jinyoung couldn't believe his eyes. Jisoo was there standing, her back facing Jinyoung. When she noticed him and Doyoung, she approached them with an apologetic smile.

"Sorry, it took so long for me to get ready."

Jinyoung managed to control his expression but deep down, his heart was beating so loud. Jisoo was truly beautiful. She wore a tight, pink long-sleeve top and black high-waisted skirt. Her makeup was done so beautifully and she curled her long black hair. Like Doyoung said, her visual was beyond beautiful, acknowledged even by SM standard.

Doyoung approached her first, exaggerately complimenting her appearance in which she continuously laughed it off. When the staff called Doyoung for his solo dance, Jisoo and Jinyoung were left alone on the side of the stage. There was an awkward silent for a minute or two, both of them didn't know what to say. Jinyoung kept his focus on Doyoung's solo part, but he noticed that Jisoo had been throwing glances at him for several times. He turned his head to check on her and Jinyoung was surprised that she was also looking at him. She realized she got caught and quickly looked away.

Jinyoung cleared his throat.

"Jisoo-ssi," he started. Jisoo turned her head, too quickly for her liking.

"Ne, Jinyoung-ssi?"

"You look really beautiful." Crap, Jinyoung mentally cursed himself. He wanted to compliment her but he realized he was being too direct just now. He looked away for a while but then checked on her reaction through the corner of his eyes.

Jisoo wasn't looking at him. But she smiled so gently.

"Kamsahamnida," she replied. By then, Jinyoung felt a bit relieved that he didn't get any bad reaction. However, her reaction brought an unfamiliar feeling inside of his stomach instead. Again, they went silent.

This time Jisoo started, "you don't look so bad, either, Jinyoung-ssi. Me on the other hand, I hope I don't look too awkward in this outfit. I feel like this outfit doesn't really suit me. The skirt is too short, I'm a bit worried." She unconsciously played with the hem of her skirt then turned to look at Jinyoung and both of them shared eye contact.

"No, I think you look great. But I do think that your skirt is a bit too short. You should be more careful when you dance."

"Ne, thank you, Jinyoung-ssi."

When Doyoung was finished with his rehearsal and briefing, he approached Jinyoung and Jisoo. He told Jisoo that it was her turn to rehearse. Jisoo rushed to find the PD and started her rehearsal.

"Hyung, I can't wait to see Jisoo-noona's dance!!" Doyoung nudged Jinyoung's arm. The older idol just laughed without even taking his eyes off from the girl in front of him. As soon as her song started, his eyes got wide and he had to clear his throat because damn.

The dance was y. He didn't expect that side from her.

Doyoung was already excitedly cheering for Jisoo, he was a bit too loud that even his manager told him not to disturb Jisoo. Jinyoung could only stare. There was no need for him or Doyoung to talk or converse because they were all too occupied with her dance.

Jinyoung recalled Doyoung's statement. There was something different about her. She suit SM's visual and JYP's outgoing personality, on top of that, she also fit YG's charismatic stage vibe. She's perfect, he thought. This is the first time he found someone like her. It's like she was different people in one body. Like an actress who could be anybody she wanted to be; life was her movie.

When she was finished, she run towards Jinyoung and Doyoung instead of the PD who was calling her for a briefing.

"I can't take this, I'm so nervous. Did I do well?" She wiped the sweat on her forehead. She glanced at Doyoung but stared at Jinyoung.

"Noona, are you crazy? That was awesome! I can't keep my mouth shut!" Doyoung cheered for her like there was no tomorrow.

"Isn't it too y? I'm not that confident." Jisoo frowned, her expression worried.

"No, noona, jinjja. Your stage is the best!" Doyoung gave her two thumbs up, while Jisoo just smiled. Then, she turned to Jinyoung, waiting for some reactions from him. Jinyoung noticed this and he looked up trying to think about some compliments.

Locking eyes with her, he said, "you were great, I think you shouldn't be too nervous. You don't need to. Your stage is mesmerizing."

Again, he was being too honest. But just like the moment before, she thanked him and smiled gently at him. From afar, the PD-nim called Jisoo again and so she went.

~

It was Jinyoung's turn to rehearse now. Jisoo and Doyoung were cheering for him, but Jinyoung remained unbothered. Jisoo admired that side of him. From the first time they met, Jinyoung always displayed a professional manner that intimidated her. Working with him made her feel the gap between rookie artist and senior even more obvious. And it was true. On the stage, Jinyoung was free, he didn't feel any burden and he was not nervous. He enjoyed it and he gave the best performance he could give. On top of that, he never really showed how tired or sleepy he was. She never really heard him utter any complains.

But that was what mysterious about him. His professionalism made him mysterious; Jisoo couldn't detect what he was thinking or feeling. She used to be able to detect other people's feeling because she was that sensitive. But Jinyoung was a different challenge. She couldn't help but be intrigued.

It was a bit weird actually. Jisoo had met many charming men from her company after her debut. She was close with Winner's Mino or Ikon members, and their visuals were amazing. But the feeling she got everytime she talked with Jinyoung was different from the men she had met.

And now here he was, dancing so passionately in front of her. She could feel the heat rushing through her cheeks and necks, she tried hard to hide it so Doyoung wouldn't catch her blushing. I don't want to get caught for the second time. Jinyoung saw me staring at him, I was busted.

When his part ended, Jisoo and Doyoung were called once more to the stage. Now was the time for them to rehearse their collaboration dance. The PD explained to them how it would go.

"After Jinyoung-ssi's performance, you don't have to go back to your door. Instead stand in front of Jisoo-ssi's door and wait for Doyoung-ssi to come. Both of you will knock on her door, but don't be too hard because the door is fake. You just need to act as if you knock. Then, Jisoo-ssi will come out. Both of you need to hold out your hands and she will take them. Walk three steps forward and dance." PD-nim talked without even stopping for breath.

The three of them went straight for their position. Jisoo stood nervously behind her door while Doyoung gave her a thumbs up from her right. She saw Doyoung went out and there was a slight knock, signaling her to come out.

And there it was. His hand. Jinyoung's hand.

Unlike Doyoung's hand, his hand was much bigger and he held her hand so gently. She understood that Doyoung was a bit awkward holding a noona's hand but Jinyoung, on the other hand, gave her a brave and gentle squeeze when she took his hand. Different from Doyoung who just let her hand stay on top of his hand, Jinyoung actually held hers.

"Okay, stop. Let's start again. Jisoo-ssi, you shouldn't look down and don't be too stiff. You have to smile, you're the princess here and the boys are your princes. Be more confident. Doyoung-ssi you are good, but Jinyoung-ssi, your facial expression is too serious. Try to act more like a prince charming. You have a beautiful smile, honey. Let it out!"

Jisoo blushed. Was she that obvious? While Doyoung and Jinyoung laughed at the PD, she was feeling even more nervous. Her embarassment didn't help her at all.

And the next scene was like a blur. Jinyoung patted her shoulder softly as if she was a porcelain doll. She turned around but stopped when she could feel Jinyoung's face was so close to her ear. She blushed like mad.

"Jisoo-ssi, was it okay if I hold your hand? Do I make you feel uncomfortable? Because your hand became stiff when I held it."

God, he knew that I was taken aback by his gesture. Curse you nerve, she scolded herself. She thought of some excuses.

"Ah, ani, Jinyoung-ssi, it's fine. I'm just a bit nervous that I might make mistake." Jisoo laughed nervously. Jinyoung smiled and nodded. They all went back to their positions.

This time everything went smoothly. The PD clapped his hand and complimented them. Once they finished with their rehearsal, the three of them were called back to retouch their makeups.

~

This is the time for their first broadcast and it turned out to be difficult than what Jinyoung thought. Not that he ever thought that MC-ing would be easy, in fact Jackson had told him beforehand that it was actually burdensome. Since he was hosting a famous music show with a strict time schedule, he could not afford to make many mistakes.

Doyoung was a natural, he was quick-witted and sometimes he didn't even need to look at the script because he could make it as if he came out with the joke himself. He added ad-libs here and there, and he moved so freely.

"We put on performance to show you how excited we are, but I have to say I'm still nervous," Doyoung said.

"Me, too. I was too nervous, so I tossed and turned all night. Jinyoung-ssi, in Inkigayo, Hard Carry Hey! Are you ready to hard carry us?" Jisoo added a part of "Hard Carry" song to her script.

The entire time they shot the live broadcast, they never got tired of smiling. Well, they couldn't get tired of smiling despite the fact that they had to always read the script on the camera and also checked on each other through a small screen in front of them. Jinyoung felt lucky that the script was closer to him and it was harder for Doyoung, but the maknae nailed the broadcast.

When they were finished with the show, the PD told their managers not to take them home immediately because he needed to give each of them a private evaluation. They stayed inside the waiting room, the place where they also practiced their script. Jinyoung went out first.

"Did I do well? Please give me a lot of suggestions," Jinyoung politely asked the PD. PD-nim smiled at his manner.

"I love your voice, you balance Jisoo-ssi and Doyoung-ssi's voice. And your calm countenance had helped them either because Jisoo tended to speak a bit too fast. You only had small tongue-twisted mistakes but I hope in the future you will lessen the mistake."

"Ne, algesumnida. Thank you for your advice."

"Alright, please call Doyoung-ssi."

Jinyoung went back to the waiting room and told Doyoung that it was his turn. Doyoung looked panic but Jinyoung assured him that he did the best out of them three. He patted his dongsaeng's back. Doyoung nodded and he went out.

Jinyoung and Jisoo was left alone. Again. He saw that she hadn't changed her clothes.

"Jisoo-ssi, aren't you going to change your clothes?" he asked.

"Ah, no. I'll just go home like this," she smiled but she could not fool him that she was really nervous.

They went silent. Again.

Jinyoung decided to comfort her. "It's fine, really. I think the producer will just compliment you and give you encouragement."

"Oh, geurokuna. But still..."

"Are you worried about something?" Jinyoung looked at her and she stared back at him.

"I missed a lot of cues, and I stuttered, and..."

"Aniya, you covered it perfectly. That was really admirable."

Jinyoung threw her a reassuring smile, hoping that he could at least make her at ease.

Doyoung came in with a bright smile. Jinyoung guessed he must have received a lot of compliments. He's actually the one who 'hard-carried' us, he thought.

"How was it, maknae-ah?" Jinyoung asked, hold up his hand giving the youngest a high five.

"So far so good, the producer was nice. Jisoo-noona, it's your turn!" Doyoung called Jisoo. Jisoo stood up, giving herself a 'fighting' before going out.

"Hyung, I have to rush for another schedule. Today was really fun, see you next week!" Doyoung took his stuffs and followed his manager.

"Be careful on your way, Doyoung-ah!"

Just when Doyoung left, Jinyoung's manager-hyung came in. He brought a comfortable white shirt and dark jeans, as well as his bag.

"You want to leave now?" his manager asked but Jinyoung shook his head.

"No, can we wait for a little longer? I want to rest for a while."

"Do you want some soda or tea? I can get you one from the vending machine."

"Ah, a green tea will be great. Thanks, hyung." Jinyoung smiled as he thanked his manager. And he smiled as he remembered that Jackson was the one who influenced him to like green tea. He liked green tea now.

He sunk into the sofa. Truth to be told, he didn't want to rest. He actually wanted to go back home as soon as possible but his gut feeling told him to stay.

Maybe because he wanted to know what happened to Jisoo, he wanted to be sure that she would be fine.

Today had been a roller coaster ride. It was his first nerve-wrecking Inkigayo broadcast, and he got even closer with Doyoung. He got closer with Jisoo, too, minus the uncomfortable feeling he felt everytime she was near. In a good way, though.

He thought back everytime he was left alone with her. Several times, in fact. He started to believe that it might be more than just a list of coincidences. It might be something bigger and stronger. It might be fate.

And everytime they were left alone, they couldn't talk normally. They couldn't chat or joke around like when Doyoung was around. Both of them would steal glances, and got embarassed when they got caught staring. And when they actually talked, the unfamiliar feeling was there, budding inside him. There was a tingling feeling inside his stomach, and he would unconsciously smile at her.

The Jisoo effect, he would call.

Then he remembered when he held her hand. Her hand was not really small. Her fingers were long and thin. He remembered when he accidentally squeezed her hand because he was nervous, and how surprised he was when she squeezed back. Both of them knew it was a reflex, but when they rehearsed the stage again, they would squeeze each other hand again.

This feeling..... Maybe because it's been so long since I actually be this close to a woman, he thought.

10 minutes had passed and Jinyoung began to get worried. His and Doyoung's briefing weren't this long. Apparently the PD had a lot to say to Jisoo. He was even more determined to wait for her but then his manager told him to go back home because he need rest as he woke up too early that day. He thought about a lot of excuses he could get but-

"Tomorrow you have practice and interviews all day long. You need all the rest you can get."

He couldn't fight it and go home.

~

"You were great, Jisoo. But you are too stiff, you should be more natural. I like that you're always smiling but smiling too much might make people think that it's fake."

Jisoo was shocked to hear that. Apparently she was getting a scold, not an encouragement.

"You missed a lot of cues but thanks to Doyoung, he covered you. You actually handled that professionally and you covered your own mistakes but it couldn't happen so often. Doyoung and Jinyoung couldn't always cover you, you should be aware of this." The PD paused for a bit and then he sighed.

"But overall, you were great. Don't be too nervous, you are a rookie and this is your first time so I fully understand. I just need to tell you this so you won't do the same mistake anymore. My suggestion for you is... just try to be Jisoo, just let it flow naturally. Don't be someone else. Don't be too intimidated by Jinyoung because I saw you glance at him a lot of times, trying to copy him. In time, you will find your character and you will get better." This time, the PD gave her a kind smile.

Jisoo nodded and she bowed. Tears were glistening on her eyes and she need to get out there as soon as possible. She looked for her manager-unnie and as soon as she found her, she cried.

"Unnie, can we get out of here as soon as possible, please?" Jisoo whispered. She wiped her tears and tried hard to stop another one from going down her face.

Manager-unnie gave her a tissue, "dry your tears first. You can tell me everything once we are inside the van but for now, try to hold back a little longer."

"Ne, unnie."

Once she was sure that she was no longer crying, Jisoo and her manager quickly walked out the building and got in the car. Inside, manager-unnie asked her about what happened.

"I screwed up, unnie. I made a lot of mistakes and I felt bad because Doyoung-ssi and Jinyoung-ssi had to help me. I never want to be a burden."

"Did the PD scold you? Because I honestly will-"

"Ah, no. He was kind to me, unnie. I just felt bad that's all. I had to apologize to Jinyoung-ssi and Doyoung-ssi. I am sorry for giving them too much trouble."

"You don't need to apologize. You made mistakes but it's fine. In the future, you will get better so just focus on improving yourself. I do believe that the other MCs wouldn't mind."

Jisoo nodded and she kept quiet the entire time.

"Good job today, Jisoo-ya."

"Kamsahamnida, unnie."

The rest of the trip back home was quiet and Jisoo almost fell asleep in the car because she was physically and emotionally tired. She was about to give in to sleepiness when she heard a notification from her phone.

She was shocked to see it. There was a KakaoTalk message.

P. Jinyoung (3:50PM):
Are you okay?

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Sorry for the long update. It's summer holiday here in where I live so I went traveling with my parents. But throughout the trip I can't stop thinking about this story. Hope you like it!

The plot was based on my fantasy so it wouldn't be based on the true story. But the scene when Jinji hold hands, it was real (at least to me). If you look at the photos of them during the MC Special Stage, you could see that Jinyoung held Jisoo's hand so tight unlike Doyoung. It made me all giddy!

Cheers! I hope someone can leave a review!