Jimin had a busy day. He felt tired after signing all the needed documents and taking all calls in the absence of his boss. He was sitting in the passenger seat, and Jungkook has been quiet since they had left the office building.

They were stuck in the traffic for a while and Jimin didn’t want to break the silence. He enjoyed it and because of it Jungkook was so concentrated on something in his mind, he could stare at him all he wanted. Jimin felt the butterflies in his belly as his eyes landed on the other’s lips. He bit his own lips till it bled and it away. It left a metallic taste behind and he regretted doing so. How he had imagined touching and kissing the younger male’s lips? He would die for it to be able to just do it once. He snapped out of his thoughts when Jungkook looked at him.

Jimin felt a blush creep on his cheeks and he looked away, snapping his neck to other side and looked out of the window. He regretted it as he felt a cramp in his neck.

“Hyung, are you alright?” Jimin heard Jungkook ask. He couldn’t face the younger and he didn’t really trust his voice so he just nodded.

“Are you sure? You sounded like you were in pain.” Jungkook asked and he was sure he had heard a whimper. He kind of was regretting spacing out, because the older could been hurt.

“No, no I’m fine.” Jimin replied quickly. He didn’t want Jungkook to worry about him unnecessarily, but he had managed to cause him worry anyway. He felt stupid for letting out a sound during his daydreaming. He just wanted to bury himself that moment.

“Okay.” Jungkook said, but it didn’t convince him, because he knew Jimin had a bad habit of suffering in silence. He couldn’t know what was going if he didn’t press further. But today he decided to let it slide because he had a big day coming up tomorrow. He had worked hard on his presentation and had analyzed the files. It had taken him three days. At first he was doing it because he could use it to convince his hyung to move back in with them, but the more he saw the pain in the older male’s eyes the more stupid he felt for using this reason.

Jungkook decided to not pressure the older about moving in again. He decided he should focus on the matter at hands while he took care of his hyung. Jungkook had found some flaws in their way of thinking and the products they had launched in the market. He had his files in the back seat of the car and his presentation was ready. Jimin had promised him to give feedback when they were back home and he hoped he wouldn’t be scolded.

The older still looked out of the window and his cheeks were still warm. He could feel the heat radiating off of the younger and it made more difficult for him to concentrate on what he was looking at. There were enough times he had imagined himself with Jungkook, going places and enjoying himself. He knew it all just his wishful thinking and the younger was out of his reach and his league. On the other side walking hand in hand with his beloved would never be possible in his country. A sigh left his lips and he could see from reflection that the younger was looking at him.

Jimin kept his head against the window and closed his eyes with a heavy heart. They were good 10 minutes away from home and he knew that Jungkook was planning on staying the night. He had to still cook them dinner. It had been a big surprise to know that the younger was quite a good cook as well. ‘Maybe he would like to cook together’ he wondered. Jimin was old enough to understand that his feelings for the younger weren’t healthy and he would never be able to have a piece of younger’s heart. At least not the way he wanted.

He had been deep into thoughts when he felt the car to halt and he opened his eyes. After looking around Jimin found them parked in front his apartment building. He was quite shocked that he had been sunken into thoughts so much and he hadn’t even realized they had been home.

//

Jungkook had taken shower and borrowed Jimin’s clothes. The older had the habit of wearing loose clothes which were perfect for him. The older had smaller frame and the clothes often hung off Jimin’s shoulders and his hands would be covered by long sleeves which made his hyung even more adorable. The older had smaller hands and fingers were chubby. It was as if Jimin’s hands had stopped growing after he had turned eight or something.

The younger male was busy in the kitchen with choosing ingredients. After having such packed day at the office their tummies needed to be filled. They had gone shopping the other day after he had made breakfast that morning. Jungkook had wondered how his hyung had survived and if he even cooked for himself the two years he was away. His worries about Jimin’s weight had now been pushed back for the moment. He wanted to believe that Jimin would try to get better and eat more. Jungkook also didn’t want push the older because he knew in how much pain Jimin was.

The raven-haired went ahead and put the rice in rice cooker after washing it. He cut the different vegetables and the meat started making his delicious stew. Jungkook was cheating because he had cooked the dish often when he was abroad. On top of it he wanted to impress the older that he could cook as well.

The younger was busy with stirring the stew when he heard a loud thud. Jungkook’s heart sunk when he realized that it could be his hyung and he quickly put the gas off, rushing to the bathroom.

Jimin had taken a shower and he had felt guilty that he had filthy images swimming in his mind. In the center of it all was his beloved Jungkook. He wanted to throw up again, but he had stopped himself when he remembered the look on Jungkook’s face when he had found him in the bathroom the other night. His shower had turned from lukewarm to ice-cold. Jimin had shivered when he stepped out the shower, but it had helped against the desire bubbling in his belly.

After putting fresh clothes Jimin felt the floor started to shake under his feet. He had to grip the all to keep his balance. The older had remained in the same spot and closed his eyes. He concentrated on his breathing and tried to relax. Jimin was sure no matter how much he tried the guilt would never go away. His thoughts and his imagination had taken the best of him, but he had put a halt to it on time. ‘But what about dreams every night?’ he asked himself.

Jimin knew it was stupid to ask himself this question because there was no way his love of years would go away just because he felt guilty or just because the others would find it wrong. He and Jungkook weren’t blood related, but they had grown up together. It was one of the reasons he started coping with his feelings the way he did. After waiting for good five minutes Jimin tried to make his way to living, but half way through he felt dizzy and he legs gave out.

He remained silent as he tried to focus on the floor and he felt his whole body tremble. It was a strange feeling. It had never happened before. Jungkook had gone abroad and some days he had fallen asleep without eating anything and sometimes it was even intentional, but he would never admit it to anyone. His most used excuse was that he was just too busy. He had all the freedom he had wanted after he had moved out of the Jeon’s house. There was nobody here to check on him and he could go without eating for longer time.

Jimin was still on the floor and spacing out when his body jolted after a warm hand on his shoulder. His eyes met the doe-eyes filled with worry and Jimin felt a pang in his chest.

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