“there’s no shame in running home” / lifetime

The setting sun leaves an orange haze on the neighborhood as Jennie walks quietly with her head bowed. She had decided to go to the reunion, after all. She opens the door to the restaurant, some fancy fusion place by the university. The door is heavy, as if she shouldn’t enter.

“Jennie!” Jeongyeon seems excited she made it, beaming like a teenager.

She makes eye contact with Nayeon as she sits at the table. They barely speak, but Nayeon gives her a reassuring squeeze of the hand.

“You didn’t bring your boyfriend?” Nayeon asks before taking a sip of wine.

“No, why would I?” Jennie laughs uncomfortably. But she misses this, she misses Nayeon.

“By the way, Jennie… I don’t know if it’s true or not, but I heard that…”

The bell above the door jingles, distracting Jennie and interrupting Nayeon.

Jennie watches as a woman enters the restaurant: Lee Hayi, but not Lee Hayi?

She’s older, she’s lost weight. She has longer hair… It’s Hayi, but not the Hayi she remembers.

“You’re here!” Nayeon smiles at Hayi as Jennie looks on in confusion. She feels like she’s been punched in the gut.

Hayi gives Jennie and Nayeon a small greeting before joining everyone else at the table. They eat and drink as the last of their classmates slowly show up with apologies and smiles.

“What happened after first year, Hayi?” A curious classmates finally asks, causing a stillness to take over the table. “No one could get in contact with you, it was like you just vanished into thin air.”

“The rumor was that you got pregnant and dropped out.” One of the guys adds with a laugh.

“I did.” Hayi answers solemnly. “I got married, I have two children now. But I’m already divorced.”

“Wow, no kidding!”

“Hayi, is that true?” Jennie asks in shock. No, it can’t be real.

Because that would mean…

“Yes, you ruined my life, Jennie.” Hayi points at her from across the table. Jennie feels the room start to spin, everyone is looking at her.

“No, Hayi, I didn’t mean to…”

“You did this me!” Hayi screams. “You ruined my life! You ruined everything!”

Jennie wakes up with a start, clutching her head. feels dry, had she been yelling her sleep?

She gets out of bed, moving slowly toward the bathroom. She pauses by the toilet before falling to her knees, retching suddenly. She stands back up, giving herself a miserable look in the mirror before getting ready for the day.

She feels like a zombie. She’s alive, and not alive.

It was just a dream, she tries to half-heartedly reassure herself, but the feeling doesn’t go away.

“Jennie!” She flinches at the sound of her name called out in anatomy lab. She turns her head to see Hanbin.

She can’t seem to find the strength to meet his eyes.

It was just a dream.

It was just a dream.

It was just a dream.

He slides into the seat next to her, his shoulders slumped. She raises a brow at him, to which he responds with a lopsided smile. He reminds her of a puppy. Cute and clueless.

“Jennie, about getting coffee…”

“Okay.” Jennie agrees before he can finish his sentence.

“Really?” He asks with a renewed vigor. “What about after lab today?”

“That’s fine, but how about we get drinks instead?”

“Drinks?” He tilts his head to the side. “But it’ll barely be passed lunch.”

She shoots him a look.

“Oh, okay, yeah. Day drinking is fine, too.”

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