i've had good times with some bad guys
i've told whole lies with a half smile / cheerleader

There’s a bird that has taken to sitting on her window sill. It doesn’t do much. Every so often it hops around around the stone siding. Sometimes it taps curiously at the glass. But mostly it just… sits there.

Even with a light rain tapping at the pane, the bird sits outside her window.

Jennie watches the bird peck at its feathers when the sound of high heels on tile redirects her attention. She wonders for a moment if it’s Dr. Park, but the young doctor had told her she’d be going out of town for a conference.

“So you weren’t pregnant, huh?” Hayi walks into the room holding a teddy bear bought from the store downstairs.

The bear’s constricted pupils stare into Jennie’s soul, lifeless and yet all-seeing. On his chubby stomach covered in fur he wears a crop top that reads get well bear-y soon. Jennie glances up at the person holding the bear, doubting the sincerity of the sentiment.

“Are you here to watch me die?”

“No, I just thought I’d drop in and say hi.” She looks at the assortment of bouquets and sympathy gifts Jennie has received. Gingerly, she props the bear up against a vase. “Hanbin said it would be nice.”

Jennie lets out a little laugh.

“Are you bragging you didn’t come here by your own choice?”

Hayi ignores the question and instead moves a chair closer to the bed, sitting down. She sets her purse on the ground before looking back up with long black lashes and glittery eyelids.

Jennie can’t help but notice her hair looks shinier, healthier. Her dark circles have also faded. She doesn’t look as tired.

“You know your boyfriend got me fired from the club in a drunken rage.” Hayi speaks finally, hands folded in her lap. Even her nails are done.

“Sorry about that. Not my boyfriend, though.” Jennie says, but otherwise is not surprised nor apologetic. “Jaewon and I broke up.”

“Really?” Hayi raises a brow. “What a shame. Nice guy.”

“You know you’ve always been so damn sarcastic.” Jennie hisses non-maliciously.

“You bring it out in me.” The other girl sighs. She crosses one leg over the other. “Wanna know why I’ve always hated you?”

“Enlighten me.” Jennie answers sincerely. She had read the diary, but she never truly understood what had started it all.

“We’re the same, you and me.” Hayi says, and Jennie gives her a strange look. “When Minho and I first started dating he told me I should be more considerate of you, that your parents were gone all the time so you acted out like a brat needing attention.”

Jennie bites her cheek. How kind of Minho to have shared her personal information. She can’t be mad at him after all of these years have passed but something doesn’t sit right knowing Hayi’s impression of her was formed through those words. But the Jennie whose first love was Minho still feels a slight tinge of betrayal.

A thought comes to Jennie. Her eyes soften, but her lips are downturned and mean.

“And you felt like th