now i feel like a hurricane,
and it’s so hard to stop the rain / fear

“We’ve gotta stop meeting like this.”

Jennie smiles despite herself when she sees Minho rolling toward her. Her grip on the paper bag in her hand tightens when she sees that he’s wearing a hospital gown.

“Did something happen?”

“I’ll carry that for you.” He ignores her, gesturing to the bag of food her aunt had sent along for Jinwoo when she saw him. She gives him a questioning look.

“It’s heavy, though.” She replies with a small frown. He waves her off.

“Just put it in my lap, it’s not like I could feel it anyway.” She doesn’t respond and only stares at him. “What?”

“Only if I can push your wheelchair.”

His brows knit together in confusion.

“I don’t need you to, I get around fine by myself.”  

“Can I try just once then?” She bargains.

“You know most people try to push my wheelchair because they don’t want to look me in the eye when they talk to me.” Minho muses, taking the bag from her hands and placing it on his thighs. “Ah, this is heavy. I’ll have to hold it with both hands.”

She lightly bites her lip before wrapping her fingers around the handles.

“This is harder than I thought.” She says out loud as they go through the corridor. The chair vibrates as he chuckles.

“Really? Maybe I should lose weight.”

They board the glass-walled elevator, watching as the people below get farther away. She rolls him off of the elevator, nearly bumping into a nurse. She apologizes sheepishly, but Minho only laughs and laughs and laughs. She wishes she could see his face, she wonders if his laughter reaches his eyes.

“I’ve always wanted to do that.” Jennie admits as they arrive to the lobby. Minho doesn’t leave, even though she’s sure he has no business in this part of the hospital.

“That’s kind of a weird dream, but it’s not like it took much to indulge.”

“I guess not, huh?” She gives him a tight-lipped smile. She doesn’t want to admit it was something she had only thought of since meeting him again. She wondered what it would be like to walk from behind him again, going on a walk and looking at the sun as it filtered through the trees.

“That’s gonna stink like hell when you take it off.” He changes the subject, nodded toward her cast.

“My boyfriend already thinks it smells terrible.”

“Jung Jaewon, right?”

“Mhm.”

“You know, he had a pretty terrible reputation when we were first years.” Minho says, his tone strange. Both concerned and detached at the same time.

“He has a pretty terrible reputation now.” Jennie sighs, wishing she’d never brought Jaewon up. Maybe she’d wanted to get a rise out of him.

“No, I mean, like, telling people he wanted to be a surgeon so he could slice into people’s bodies without getting arrested.”

“Yeah, that sounds like him.” Jennie laughs humorlessly. Minho gives her a disparaged look.

“, you’ve become self-destructive.”

She ignores him, a small smile still on her lips. She takes the bag from him as her name is called.

She looks over at the door, then pauses.

“Can I get your number?”

“Why would you want my number?”

“So I can call you. We’re old friends, right?”

“That sounds like a terrible idea, Jen.” He grimaces, rubbing his knee. It might be habit, she’s noticed him do it before. “Don’t you remember what I did to you? You’ll just get hurt again.”

“I know.” Jennie says without skipping a beat. “But I’m self-destructive so I’ll enjoy it.”

He relents, handing her his phone. She cheerfully programs in her number before walking away for her appointment.

She takes deep breaths as she passes through the hallway, barely holding back the tears.

Her chest hurts.

…

Jennie sits alone in a booth, keeping her hands in her pockets to keep them warm. The only available seat was by the door, which kept swinging open and letting in cold air. Her arm itches and feels strange, but it doesn’t hurt anymore.

Jinwoo had told her to be careful. He said he’d kill her if he had to heal any more broken bones. He said he didn’t know if he could stand fixing her up all of the time. She was starting to get sick of it, too.

“How may I help you?” Her waitress asks cheerily, then pausing when s