Have you ever had a moment when everything just… stops?

The world freezes.

Then everything moves and you can do nothing but watch your world fall to pieces in front of your eyes.

That’s happened three times to me. When Mom died. When Hobi died.

The third time was when I saw that car driving towards Taehyung.

The saying that you don’t know you how much you love someone until you lose him is true. So, so true.

I never realized how much Taehyung meant to me until I saw him turn and face the car with confusion, then panic and fear in his eyes.

I didn’t fully realize that Taehyung was everything to me until I saw the car send him flying.

Until I saw the blood pooling under his head.

Until I saw his closed eyes.

Until my world shattered.

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

“Hobi!” I cry. Hoseok’s mother is standing to the side with tears in her eyes. She’s nursing a bruise on her cheek.

My father is drunk. Again. And so he went for Hobi.

My beloved little brother. The only light in my life. The sweetest, most innocent creature on the planet.

Hobi shrieks. “Yoongi!” he wails. “Yoongi, help me!” I look at him, then at my father. My father smiles at me. I snarl and dive for him. I’m not heavy, but I’m still able to push him away from Hobi. He snarls and pushes me into Hobi’s mother. Mandy grabs me. I shove her away and run to Hobi.

“Leave him alone!” I cry. My father smiles at me again.

“This is how I teach you a lesson,” he purrs, his voice slurred. “I just have to hurt your darling Hobi. That should teach you” I pale. He shoves me away again. Hobi looks at me with tears streaming down his face. I reach out for him. My father kicks me, and I groan in pain.

“Leave him alone,” I whisper. “Sir, leave him alone. I promise I’ll do better next time.” My father just shakes his head.

“It’s not enough. You always promise you’ll do better. And you never do. So now, I’ll make you suffer.” I start to cry.

“Daddy, stop!” Hobi cries. “Daddy, Yoongi knows! It’s hurting him!” I wince. My father looks at him. His face softens for a moment. I hold my breath. Then his face hardens and he flings a kick at innocent, defenseless Hobi.

Hobi’s cry of pain will haunt me for the rest of my life. I can do nothing but watch, helpless, as my father kicks Hobi.

Over.

And over.

And over.

Until Hobi doesn’t cry anymore.

Until Hobi stops breathing.

My father stops, looks at the body in front of him. I rush forward. I shake Hobi.

“Hobi! Hobi! Hobi, wake up!”

There’s no response.