I don’t know what happened to my heart and mind when you walked into my life. I was never one to fall for someone; at least not this fast and definitely, not this deeply. I guess you could say it was love at first sight, well maybe for you it was. For me you weren’t want I had in mind. But, then again you can’t always pick the dog you find.

Our first meeting wasn’t anything spectacular. In fact, I quickly forgot your name by the time our company’s annual Christmas party ended. You with those puppy eyes and that lopsided smile always seemed to find me in the sea of endless people. It was sickening to say the least. If you hadn’t been a new employee I would have found you downright creepy.

Yes, falling for you wasn’t in any of my plans but who could say no to a person as sweet as you? It’s no secret that I come off as more or less a . But, if being a is what got me all the success I desired then, I don’t care if others saw me as that. Success was the only thing my heart beat for, at least up until the point where I needed someone and there was no one to help but you…

 I was working late one night trying to finish up a big project that was due by the end of the week. I was certain that the only people left in the building were myself and the security guard. She was fairly older woman and would always wave me off as I entered the parking lot. I guess you can say she was the only tolerable one in the whole company.

As I was walking to my car I noticed that it wasn’t the only one in the parking lot. It was odd because I’ve never seen it before. Maybe it belonged to the security guard I thought to myself. Whomever it belonged too wasn’t any of my business, my main concern was finally getting home to my bed and getting whatever little rest I could.

 I’m not a mechanic but I do know that a car was supposed to start when you turn the key in the ignition so why wasn’t mine starting? No matter how hard I tried it just wouldn’t start. I contemplated looking under the hood but quickly denounced the idea. I wouldn’t even know what I was looking for. I slumped down in my seat and thought about my options. I could either call a taxi or I could spend the night in my car. I didn’t trust anyone other than myself to get me home safety so I guess I was stuck with the other option.

I tired closing my eyes but there was a light tap on my window. I almost had a heart attack when I saw your shadow next to my car. “Are you having car trouble?” You softly spoke to me as I rolled my window down. “Well what does it look like to you?” I know I wasn’t in any position to be this rude to you, but that’s my defense mechanism whenever I’m scared. I think you sensed how frightened I was because you apologized for scaring me and gave me a small smile. “If you’d like I’d be more than willing to give you a lift home. My car is just over there and I can’t let you sit out here all night.” So, that was your car I noticed earlier. You seemed generally worried about my wellbeing and its true I didn’t want to spend all night here. So, I accepted your offer, but still my defenses were high.

“If you don’t mind me asking; what are you doing here so late?” We were on our way to my house. “I could ask you the same thing.” Again, I really didn’t mean to come off that rude. “Oh, I was working on the big project.” I must have given you a confused look because I never noticed you at any of the meetings before. “Oh, I forgot to mention they just put me on the project to help speed things along.” You laugh nervously. You’re an odd one, I said to myself. The rest of the ride home would have been silent if it hadn’t been for the radio softly playing music. I would have never guessed that you’d be into classical music.

“Well I think this your house if I’m not mistaken.” I looked out the window and sure enough you were right. “Do I owe you anything for the ride?” You slowly shook your head no. “It was my pleasure.” The same stupid smile I first saw you with tugged at your lips. “Umm…okay. Thank you for the ride.” I was about to step out your car when your voice stops me. “May I pick you up tomorrow morning?” I didn’t miss how big and bright your eyes became waiting for me to answer you.

I wanted to reject your offer but the logical part of my brain knew that wouldn’t be a very smart idea. After all it’s not as if I could call someone else for a ride. As you can assume getting to the top didn’t get me any friends and my closest family leave too far away. I had no choice but to take you up on your offer. Little did I know that would be the beginning of the end of my heart.

Over the next three months I saw more and more of your charming eyes and goofy smile, even when I clearly didn’t want too. You always managed to make your way to my side. Whether it was for a quick hello or at lunch. Others must be wondering why a sweet person as yourself would even waste your time with someone like me; I know because I find myself wondering the same thing. No matter how many times I rejected your invitations to meet outside work your smile never faulted nor did that cheerful demeanor of yours.

You would even text me good morning and good night, though I never once texted you back. I would say that giving you my number was a mistake but then again I would be lying to myself. How could I have known that your persistence was slowly wearing away at the walls I’ve built to protect not only myself but also my heart.

I find myself laughing at your corny jokes and smiling at the stories you would tell me about your childhood. I will never admit this but I kind of looked forward to spending lunch with you. So, when the day came for us have lunch again I find myself smiling uncontrollably once I see you walking towards me. “Hello pretty girl.” You greet me. You’ve said that every time we meet but as of lately I feel my heart start to race and no matter how hard I try, I can’t seem to slow it down. “So, any plans for this weekend?” I lower my head and sigh out a no. Unless my family asks I never really have any to do on the weekends.

“Will you accompany me to the movie theater tomorrow? … Please?” Any other time I would say no without hesitation but I couldn’t do that this time. It’s astounding how you’ve managed to twist my emotions without even noticing it. “If I say yes will stop asking me?” “Of course, not.” You giggled. Somehow, I’m not at all surprised by your answer. “Fine I’ll go.” I say in a strain voice. If I could I’d love to erase that goofy grin off your face. “Great, I’ll pick you up around four. Well I must go now.” “Go? Go where you just got here. Oops!” I clasp my hand over my mouth. I believe I may have said too much.

“Don’t worry pretty girl I promise I’ll make it up to you tomorrow.” You winked at me and I felt my face flush slightly with heat. “If I don’t see you anymore today, then I hope you have a great day and peaceful dreams. And don’t let the rain ruin that beautiful face of yours.” Before I could utter a single word, you were out of my sight. I started to worry about what I had gotten myself into and just exactly what this girl had in store tomorrow.

I can’t believe I’m letting myself get this worked up over something as simple as going to the movies. It’s not like I haven’t been before… I’ve just never been with a person as annoying as you. I do hope I look nice. I had a panic attack when I heard my doorbell ring. I don’t understand what’s happening to me. If I can stand in front of a crowd of people and give a speech with no problem, then why am I acting like this is my first date? I try to push the annoy thoughts away as I open the door.

“Wow pretty girl you look amazing, like always.” “I wish I could say the same about you but you look awful.” This time I wasn’t being rude, you really did look awful. Your eyes were puffy, your nose was red, you looked as if you hadn’t slept at all in the past days. By all accounts I would say you were catching a cold. “I’m sorry for my appearance. I got caught in the rain while I was trying to find a good place for us to eat after the movie. I’ve never had the strongest immune system.” You laugh awkwardly.

It was disheartening to know you went through all this trouble just to get sick, yet you never voice any complaints about it. “Why did you come if you weren’t feeling well?” “I would have text you but I wasn’t sure you’d read my text plus, I really wanted to see you today.” I couldn’t respond to that because no one has said that to me before. I locked eyes with you for what seemed like forever.

Despite my best efforts to find any trace of deception I just couldn’t find any. It wasn’t until you let out a tiny sneeze that I’m reminded that you’re still outside. “Please come in and have a seat and rest in the living room.” “But the movie will be starting soon.” “We aren’t going anywhere with you in that condition. Now please do as I say while I go make you some homemade chicken noodle soup.” You were hesitant so I lightly grab her hand and led her to the couch.

Your hands feel so soft and warm. I hid my face away from her so she wouldn’t see the blush beginning to form. “You can watch TV while I make your soup. Call me if you need anything.” “Anything?” I don’t like the way your eyes sparkle when I told you that. “Unless you feel you’re about to pass out don’t call me. “I correct myself. “I got you.” You threw me an okay sign with your hand. You’re irritating yet I find myself not really bothered by it.

It didn’t take me long to get the soup started. The chicken was boiling and I was in the middle of chopping the fresh vegetables. “Is there anything I can do?” Your voice jolted me out my thoughts. “Didn’t I say you should be resting?” you jumped back a little bit. “I know but I miss your company.” You remind me of a shy little girl standing there with your head down and your hands gripped tightly together. I felt horrible about rising my voice to you.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to yell at you, I just want you to rest and be comfortable. But if you want company then you can watch me cook.” “Will I be in your way?” You ask cutely. “Of course, you will but I won’t mind at all.” For the first time in my life I feel my smiles were actually genuine and not just for face value.

As I cooked we talked about various subjects. Though going to the movies would have been nice I find this to be better. “Thank you for cooking for me. It looks and smells delicious.” You say as you take your first bite. “So, how is it?” I’ve never been this nervous to have someone taste my cooking before. “It’s better than delicious.” I let out a sigh of relief. I’m glad you enjoy it. “Do you know what else I enjoy?” Cautiously I shake my head no. “I enjoy seeing you smile. It’s too beautiful for you not to show it off.” I look away from you in embarrassment.

“You shouldn’t say silly things like that.” “Oh really?” Your question made me turn and face you once more. “Would you prefer I say the things that I’ve heard about you?” In that moment, I felt my anger raise. I knew it you had to be up too no good just like all the others I’ve encountered through the years. I regret letting you get this close to me. I vow I’ll never let you or another do this to me again.

“Leave after you’re done.” My voice came out as dead as you made me feel inside. “Did what I just say upset you?” You actually had the nerve to sound shocked. I was near my breaking point and I was about to just throw out when your next words surprised me. “I’m glad it upset you because it upset me when they first told me about you. Everyone says I should stay away from you, that you’re noting but a cold-hearted woman whom cares nothing about herself and success. If I had taken their advice, then I wouldn’t be here now.  You know before my father died he always told me, that if you really want to get to know a person then you must spend as much time with them as you can. Then and only then can you really see a person for who they really are.”

“I’m sorry your father died but you know absolutely nothing about me now get out of my home now!” I’ve never been this mad at one person before. I’ll make sure this is the first and last time you ever come here. “I know enough about you to know you’re hurting!” I’m caught off guard. I didn’t know your voice was able of getting so loud. “You guard yourself so that you’ll never feel pain again.” This time your voice softens and I feel you caress my cheek with a soft touch. “You wear your armor so well that you don’t even realize how constricting it is.” My heart quivered for the first time in my life. I was unable to keep my eyes focused on you.

“I’m sorry if I upset you, truly I am but I couldn’t let you keep doing this to yourself, not when you finally let me take a glimpse at the true you. The one that’s kind and caring, with a beautiful laugh to match. I don’t know what in life caused you so much grief but if you ever want to talk about it then I’m always here to listen pretty girl.”

Once you removed your hand away I felt cold chill run down my back. “Well I better get going. I think I may have over stayed my welcome. I do wish you a pleasant night.” Why can’t I say anything to you? It’s like all the things I want to say are frozen on the tip of my tongue. You were about to walk out the kitchen but it felt as if you were walking out of my life.

“I was bullied as a little girl.” I whimpered. I told myself a thousand times that I wouldn’t let my past get in the way of anything but it seems you’re the only one that’s seen through my façade. I felt so pathetic that I didn’t even want to face you again. “That must have been a horrible experience for you.” “You have no idea how difficult it is to be constantly teased about your weight and having to see your mother cry herself to sleep because her good for nothing husband ran off with someone else. That’s why I…” I couldn’t continue because thinking about the past brings up terrible memories in me.

“That’s why you shut everyone out, isn’t it?” I look up to find you staring back at me as if you were looking into my soul. “We didn’t have much but my mom did her very best for me and my two younger brothers. We may not have had the best things in the world but she made sure that we were fed and had clothes on our backs.” I feel your hand attentively touch mine. “Your mother was an expectational strong woman. I see you get every bit of her strong work ethic. It pains me to know those terrible things happened to you.”  

“Yes, well it all made me the person I am today. I don’t need anyone to feel sorry for me. I’ve made a better life for me and my family, so I have no regrets in life.” You take your time to eye me up and down. I felt your hand caress my cheek again. “You may have no regrets but that still doesn’t change the fact that I can still see you’re in pain. I can’t let someone I care about go through that.” Hearing you say something like that felt like I was stabbed in the heart.

There’s no way you or anyone else for that matter could feel that way about me. Not after the way I’ve treated you. “If you’d allow me I’d like to do something that eases away all my negative thoughts.” On instinct I jerk myself away from you. “Just what are you thinking.” “Relax I’d ever hurt you.” Not yet I thought. “Just give me your hand. You trust me, right?” “Of course, not!” I sneer but you only giggled. “You’re so mean that it’s cute.” “Whatever.” I whisper under my breath.

We made our way to the living room where you pulled out your phone. “Whenever I’m upset I dance to classical music.” I could feel my face contort in a confused manner. “I don’t dance and if I did it certainly wouldn’t be to classical music.” “Try it first before you write it off. If you don’t know how to dance, then I’ll show you. I promise I won’t laugh at you.” You held out your hand for me once again. “Please may I hold your hand? I promise if you don’t like it we’ll stop.”

I so wanted to say no but it seems like I’ve lost the nerve when it comes to you. Plus, it gets very annoying to hear you keep begging, so against my better judgement I slowly took your hand. It was very awkward for me because I’m not used to hold anyone’s hands like this, but I must say your touch is very warm compared to my cold hands. “If you laugh I swear I’ll kick you out my house and isn’t it weird that we’re two girls dancing like this?” That big stupid grin of yours reared its ugly head again. “I already told you I wouldn’t laugh, so just believe me for once. As for us being two girls, I believe if you’re having fun it doesn’t matter who you dance with.” I never knew your eyes could get so big.

“I’ll teach you how to waltz. It’s a pretty easy dance that goes well with this type of music.” I stumbled a couple of times as you took your time to teach me the dance. I know I must have looked like a fool but true to your word you never made me feel like I wasn’t doing anything other than my best. “Now that you have the basic steps down how about we try dancing to some music now?” “Oh…oh okay.” I hate the way you make my voice stutters in front of you. As the song began you bowed to me and reached out your hand. I really didn’t think that was necessary but it was cute nonetheless.

Even with all the practice we did before I still managed to miss a few steps by the time the song ended. “Do you feel any better now?” “No.” I wanted to take my hand away from yours but your hold on my hand was stronger. “I’m not giving up on you. We’ll go on to the next song until I get a smile out you.”

We did this for god knows how long but you never lost your patience with me. There was another thing I noticed. I’m not sure if it was your doing or my own. Every time we started to dance to a new song our bodies drew closer to each other. It got to the point that your hands were no longer in mine but around my waist and mine around your neck. We weren’t exactly doing the waltz anymore but I didn’t care about that.

What I did care about was how you were gazing at me. It wasn’t in a bad way nor did I feel threated by it. If I had to describe it, I would say it would be one of longing. “I think we played every song in my playlist now.” You grin at me. Now that you mentioned it there wasn’t any music playing. The only sound that could be heard was the sound of our breaths mixing together. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to keep us dancing this long.” You shook your head in disagreement. “There’s nothing to be sorry about because I enjoyed every minute of it.”

 You would think that dancing in silence would be painfully embarrassing but it’s not. It’s comforting me and I do feel slightly better. “Well pretty girl I guess I should be going now. It’s getting pretty late.” I looked out my window and sure enough the sun had gone down. “Oh, you’re right. You should go. I don’t want you out at an unsafe hour especially since you might have a cold.” We’ve already said our goodbyes, so why weren’t neither of us moving apart from one another?

In fact, not only did we not part but you pulled me closer to you so that our foreheads were touching. “Have I told you how much I love the way your eyes shine?” “I … I umm.” I try to speak but my words are caught in my throat. Sensing this you reluctantly let go of my waist and I remove my arms away from your neck. “Umm… let me grab you some soup before you go.” “Thank you for cooking for me today.” Without my consent the corners of my lips pulled upwards. “I… I’ll be right back.” It didn’t take me long in the kitchen and I was back in no time.

“Thank you so much. I know with this I won’t get sick.” That smile of yours is getting less and less stupid. “Snice I ruined our evening would you allow me the honor of taking you out next Saturday? I promise I’ll have it better planned next time.” I see the same hopeful look you have every time you asked me to do something with you. The same one that I always seem to reject.

“No.” In an instant your smile faded and the light in your eyes dimmed. “Ahh I see.” Your voice was just as small as you were. I couldn’t help but let out a small giggle at your antics. “No, you didn’t ruin the evening. I had fun with you, as much as I hate to admit it.” That seemed to be an instant cure for you. “So, I can take you out next week then?” “If I say no you’ll only ask me again some other time am I, right?” You excitedly shook your head yes. I release another small giggle. “I’ll agree only if you promise not to get sick.” “Of course, I won’t. I’ll make sure to take all the medicine I need.” How the hell can one person look so cute.

“Good, now it’s time for you to leave but call me so I’ll know you made it home safely.” We stood there in silence for a while. “What’s that?” “What’s what?” I look just about everywhere trying to figure out what you meant. “Right here.” You point directly at my heart. “I do believe I see a small crack in that wall you’ve built around your heart.” Now I know you could see the bright pink tint in my cheeks. “I’ll go now pretty girl. Have a good night sleep and I’ll definitely call you tonight.” “Al…alright.” I’m certainly going to have to do something about my voice.

As I walk you to the door you suddenly turn to face me. I almost forgot something. You lightly take my hand and press a small kiss upon it. “My father always told me that a real lady deserves a kiss on the hand to show her how special she is.” “How do you know I’m a lady? I challenged you. “My heart told me that a long time ago.” I think I lost that little battle. “Goodnight was the last thing you spoke to me before you were out of my sight but undeniably not out of heart. This is going to be a long long week and I don’t know if my heart can take it.

would you all like a 2nd part to this?