I woke up seeing a man sitting beside. Yeah, I know him. My hyung. Suddenly my eye sights became blurry and everything turned black again.

Jaein fainted for the second time in a day. He’s sweating profusely, not to mention his body temperature, he’s having high fever. Taecyeon had no choice but to call and inform Jaein’s grandmother. She needs to know about him. But the thing is Jaein had no idea about that. While Taecyeon went away to settle the things going on at the company and fetch grandmother, Jaein’s doctor in charge came in and talk with him.

“What happened actually?” With that one simple question he asked the man in white robe.

“Nothing much. Just a random head ache. But much more than the normal one. Let me simplify. You’re suffering from Brainstem glioma, a cancerous glioma tumor. I’ve diagnosed it for more than 5 times. The results doesn’t varies much. You have tumor in your brain sir. It start in the brain or spinal cord tissue and will spread throughout the nervous system. The cause is still unknown.”

“That’s why you’ve been having double vision, headache, nausea and balance problems, Mr. Sung.”

“But it is so sudden. I beg for another diagnose.”

“Symptoms can develop slowly and may go unnoticed for months. There’s cases where a sudden onset of symptoms arise abruptly. You’ve been suffering from it for quite sometimes, Mr. Sung.”

“I’ll arrange for upcoming treatment for you. Unlike most brain tumors, brainstem glioma is not often treated with neurosurgery due to complications in vital parts of the brain. More often, it is treated with chemotherapy or radiation therapy. One such trial is dendritic cell immunotherapy which uses the patient’s tumor cells and white blood cells to produce a chemotherapy that directly attacks the tumor.”

By then the man walked out of the room, but just before he walked out, Jaein threw him a question.

“How much time do I have?”

“A year. The longest. I’ll get going sir.”

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He felt like his world is ending. Crushed in a second. He took his head ache for these past years lightly. One year. What will he do in a year? What can he do in a year? That’s the question. What did he had done to deserve this kind of life? His life never went as he planned. He tried to not to blame others but himself every time things happened. ‘What can I do?’ That question kept lingering around in his mind. Tears running without him knowing. He’s breaking down alone, all by himself. He need supports the most. But, he never wanted to be weak in front of the one he loves. He still got a lot of things to do. This is not the end. This isn’t it.

Jaein walked out from his VVIP ward towards the information counter and asked about his doctor whereabouts. As soon as he knew, he went straight to his room.

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“I know that this is so sudden. I’m sorry.” The doctor said.

“No need to, doctor. You’ve done your part. I’ll survive with the meds, right? For the time being?”

“Yes, I’ll recommended the best medicines for you. But if anything happens, the side effects, please inform me right away. Although you consume the meds, I can’t sure you will recover. The tumor will spread if you do not undergo surgery as I told you before. You’re still young. I beg you, please take consideration from my advice.”

“The tumor, it still in early stage, right?”

“Yes, it is. But in a blink of an eye, it will be, they’re growing.”

“Can you schedule it this evening? I don’t want to die, doctor. I want to live. And please, don’t tell my family about me. Will you?”

“Sure! I’ll arrange the operation for you right away. But sir, if things turn bad, your family still need to know.”

“Until then, only you’ll tell them. I’m begging you.”

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VVIP Ward

Jaein was waiting for the nurses and his doctor to lead him to the operation theatre for his first ever surgery his whole life. Luckily Taecyeon still at Seoul with his grandma and Nayeon. They need to settle things before they fly to California. Jaein purposely asked his other people to delayed the flight and create problems at the airport. At least his brain still working perfectly. He hoped that the surgery went well as it’s without his grandmother acknowledgement. He apparently don’t want anyone to know about his sickness.

“I’m not ready to die yet.”

“However, these treatments do produce side effects; most often including nausea, the breakdown of the immune system, and fatigue. Hair loss can occur from both chemotherapy and radiation, but usually grows back after chemotherapy has ceased. Steroids such as Decadron may be required to treat swelling in the brain. Decadron can lead to weight gain and infection. Patients may also experience seizures, which need to be treated to avoid complications. For some patients there is a chance of a neurological break down, this can include, but is not limited to, confusion and memory loss.” He reminisce what his neurosurgeon had told him earlier.

“What if, what if I cannot remember anything after this? After all, we’ve been togethe