Baekhyun POV

 

¶Happy Birthday to you

Happy Birthday to you

Happy Birthday Baekhyynnie

Happy Birthday to you!¶

 

A day before my real birthday, I arranged a birthday party where my fans could attend here at the SM Hall. My members are already in China to prepare for our concert but I'm still here celebrating my birthday before I go out of the country. I'll leave right after this mini-event.

 

I'm here with our manager to make sure I’ll get on my flight on time. I spent 2 hours bonding with the fans, trying to be happy in front of them. I really appreciate their presence during this day but I still feel terrible after hearing Taeyeon’s confession.

 

What she said was right. I hoped for too much and that left me with nothing but disappointment and regret. So here I am again, back to the “just don't think about it” and “just distract yourself” days.

 

“Hey Elliedeul!!! I'm so glad for being able to share this time you but unfortunately, I have a flight to catch”, I announced on the microphone making everyone heave a sigh. I heard a light creak by the side of the stage.

 

STAY!

 

Someone shouted amongst the crowd. I looked at my wounded fingers. I lifted my head and lightly smiled at that fan. Then a tear escaped my eyes. Everybody felt bad for me. They chanted as I fight back the tears.

 

“ULJIMA! ULJIMA! ULJIMA! ULJIMA! ULJIMA!” (don't cry)

 

These tears are genuine. Partly because I’ll leave these precious people behind and partly because… maybe my hand still hurts so much.

 

“I'm really sorry but I promise to meet you all again next time. Bye everyone!!! Saranghaeyo!!!”

 

As I was exiting the stage the beam of lights fell. I wasn't quick enough to reach the safe part of the stage.

 

CRASH!!!

 

That's the last memory I could remember after waking up on a hospital bed. My head still hurts so much. I yelped in pain. I touched my head and felt the thick bandage on my head. I hope they didn't shave my head.

 

My manager approached me and called the nurse in. The nurse walked in.

 

No way.

 

That's it. I’m totally convinced that I really broke my head. The nurse can't possibly look exactly like Taeyeon.

 

“Hyung! How long am I here? Did something serious happened to my brain?”, I desperately asked.

 

“No, Mr. Byun. Please calm down while I check your vitals”, she calmly said while I look at her in disbelief. I blinked more than twice.

 

Then she became a normal nurse. She's not Taeyeon anymore. My poor heart is trying it’s best to calm itself down.

 

“That's right. Breath deeply. Everything's just fine”, she assured me.

 

“Okay. His vitals are okay but you still can't leave now. The head injury isn't fully recovered. Let's wait for the doctor for further instructions. He’ll come by in an hour. You may rest for now”, she told us.

 

“Thank you so much nurse”, my manager said as she exited the room.

 

“What's wrong with you? The doctor never mentioned losing memories in your case”, my manager said.

 

“Really?”

“Yes, why did you panic earlier?”

“Nothing. I just woke up. That's all”

“Are you sure? Tell me if something’s up because you’re already here for two days--”

“TWO DAYS?! What happened? What about my flight? The concert?”

“You’re still in Korea. You can’t fly there now. At least not until the doctor gives us permission. Sooman already scolded the lights technicalities team. They didn’t secure it enough. The concert happened without you. Don’t worry.”

“Still…”

“Don’t sweat about it. All you should care about for now is recovering. Tell me if you need anything, okay?”

“Tae…”

 

My manager looked at me quizzically. I said the last part softly but it's loud enough for him to comprehend what I said. He heaved a loud sigh. Then he spoke.

 

“She's here”

 

I was confused for a second until someone opened the door.

 

“Oppa, I need to go out now. Just call when he wakes--”

 

There she is holding a plastic full of snacks. Before I could react properly. She ran to me and hugged me so tight I can't breath. I hugged her back with a huge smile on my face. But then I heard her choking up a sob.

 

“I'm gonna leave for a moment”, my manager left the room.

 

“Taeng…”, I thinly said.

 

She's still crying after breaking the literally breath-taking hug. She cupped my face and started asking me a flood of questions.

 

“Are you okay now? What were you doing? Why don't you have someone else around you? Why weren't you careful, you idiot? Does it still hurt?”, she said while weeping.

 

I was just staring at her. She looks so beautiful despite all the tears that's flowing down from her enticing eyes. She kissed my bandaged head twice, thrice, a lot of times. If this is what heaven feels like, I’d stay here forever.

 

“It hurts a little bit. But I think it's hurts for you more. How does an angel like you survive a fall from heaven?”

“Are you f---”

“Language”

“How could you joke about something like this? You have stitches for God’s sake! You really--- Ugh!”

 

She cried more as I hugged and patted her on the back.

“I'm sorry. Shhh. I'm okay now. Shhh”

When she calmed down, she spoke once more.

 

“I came here the moment I heard about you. Just because I said few bad words to you doesn't mean you could kill yourself or die even for natural circumstances”.

“The moment walked out your door, I felt like I could”.

 

“That's not funny”.

 

“It's true. The moment I heard you sobbing behind the door, I thought I could just kill myself. Why do I need your permission to die anyways?”, I asked.

 

She took a lot of time before answering my question. I hope she won’t avoid it anymore.

 

“Because you still have your family, friends and fans who are rooting for you. They're the ones you should think about as you live”, she answered

 

“That’s not the answer I’m looking for. Just tell me what you REALLY feel. I want to get an honest answer. This is not about anything else. Just you.”

 

“Fine! Okay, I'll admit it. I regret everything. I should be the one taking care of this relationship since 3 years ago because I'm the older one. I'm still recounting that day at Sooman’s office to this day. I'm always thinking about what I could've done or could've not done during our year. I shouldn't have driven my car carelessly. I should've driven somewhere else. I should've been more aware of the risks but here we are, broken as ever. I want it to stay that way at least until you get out of SM’s binds. But now that you're here lying on this bed, I thought that I would regret it more and more as time goes by. You can't leave this world, not until I made it up to you, not until I erased all my regrets and I can’t do all that without you.”

 

It took a moment for me to let all that sink in. I never thought of it that way. I never thought that she blames herself. That why I want to be by her side again… to remind her that she should stop blaming everything on herself. She’s been like this before and if she doesn’t stop, she forgets how to be happy.

 

I held her hand tight using my wounded hand and held it close to my lips.

 

“Hey, it’s not your fault, okay? I promise I won’t let you feel that way again, you hear me? I’m here. We’ll get through this. We’ll erase each others’ regrets together. Don’t cry anymore, okay?”, I told her sincerely as I wipe away her tears.

 

She looked straight at me. I took the chance to lean in and give her a kiss… on the forehead. She gave me the irresistable pout I longed for three 3 years. Then I laughed and gave her a real long kiss on the lips. I turned my head as I took it deeper. Though she responded quickly, she backed away to say something.

 

“We’re not gonna go far from kissing until you’re fully-healed, okay?”, she said with the seriousness in her eyes.

 

God, how I miss this lady so much.

 

 

A/N

I originally want this chapter to be longer but I hate sad moments. Subscribe for more Byuntae moments between Baek and Sehun. Comment for more Slayeon performances. You go girl!