pairing: jihyo x all of Twice

summary: So many girls, so much heartbreak. Or, the many adventures of Jihyo's leather jacket.

Good Aim

"Nayeon, please! Why can't you listen?" she shouted from the ground, too agitated to care if the whole neighborhood was watching their last meltdown. Instead of answering, Nayeon threw a curious collection of Jihyo's underwear down from the balcony and didn't even look her way.

"Do you really care this much about gossip?" Jihyo pleaded to an empty balcony as Nayeon had walked in again. She hated this public humiliation, but she hated her girlfriend's absence even more.

The wind picked up momentarily and pushed dead leaves across the yard, but Jihyo didn't watch them as they rolled around. She kept her gaze fixed on the door, waiting for Nayeon to return and thinking about arguments that could still save her.

By the time, Nayeon came back, the only thing she could think of was: "I thought you loved me." As an answer, Nayeon threw a toothbrush, which hit Jihyo square in the head. Accidental or not, Jihyo had to give credit to Nayeon's good aim as she rubbed her forehead and stared at the lonely toothbrush in front of her. It looked strangely small between all the grass blades and leaves - this is not where I belong, it screamed without a voice.

"Nayeon-" she started once again, but this time the older girl cut her off.

"Don't come back!" she shouted and shot daggers with her eyes for the last time before she threw Jihyo's leather jacket down from the third floor, walked inside and closed the balcony door with a bang. Jihyo watched as the leather jacket fell like a dead bat and crushed the bones it didn't have as it hit the ground.

She looked up for the last time but saw no sign of her girlfriend - ex-girlfriend, she told herself. She walked to the spot where the jacket lay fallen, dusted it off and put it on. After that she picked all her things that Nayeon had thrown out and put them in to the apartment building's garbage bin.

She walked home, feeling heavy and light at the same time. It had always been Nayeon's show anyway.

XO

"This jacket needs something. It's not punk enough," Chaeyoung said seriously and turned the leather jacket around in her hands.

"What if I don't want it to be punk," Jihyo said, grinning as if was too full keep open. She watched the younger girl and ignored the boys who kept moving instruments on the stage behind them.

"Aren't you in a band?" Chaeyoung said and lifted her gaze momentarily, frowning like an old man who has made up his mind thirty years ago and won't change it again.

"Our band isn't like that," she said and looked down on her own short nails, pushing the inside of her cheek with her tongue. In fact, there was nothing "punk" about the band and she was aware of it. They were too embarrassed to even get out of the practice room most of the time. The boys were worse than she was and she had always had expertise in shyness.

"Every good band has it, even if they're playing folk. Punk is what I call the soul of the band. It’s the thing that keeps the band going."

"You think we are good?" Jihyo said and tried pull her stomach in so that it wouldn't jump from excitement.

"Of course," Chaeyoung said and provided a pouch out of her bag. It was black with a white lion in the middle and looked expensive - but the thing about Chaeyoung was that you could never know - everything she owned looked expensive even if she had just pulled it out of a garbage bin. "Why else would I be here?"

Because you like me like I like you, Jihyo thought wistfully and stared at the younger girl's hands as they dropped glue on the left shoulder of the jacket. She was too stunned, at the fact that Chaeyoung was carrying glue with her, to comment on what she was doing. The girl hadn't asked for a permission to do anything, but Jihyo couldn't bring herself to mind.

"You're so good at everything," she said quietly, afraid that the boys might hear her little confession.

"Thanks," Chaeyoung said and smiled, but did not lift her gaze. Jihyo felt slightly disappointed but tried not to feel discouraged.

"You should teach me," she whispered, looking from under her eyelashes. As she felt especially bold, she lifted her hand and pushed the girl's short hair behind her ear so that it wouldn't be on the way as she worked on the jacket.

"Teach you what?" Chaeyoung said and looked up, blinking at her cluelessly.

"Uhm... I- ...drawing," Jihyo stammered and looked away, embarrassed. Either the girl was acting like she didn't understand or she really didn't understand.

"Oh, drawing is pretty straight forward. I started by..." Chaeyoung began and went on a speech about different styles that she liked and anatomy books that she had found helpful, while Jihyo swallowed her hopes. At least, in the end, her jacket got the letters "xo" on the left shoulder. They had been written with tiny plastic rocks that looked like diamonds – which Chaeyoung had also been carrying around. Finally, the jacket looked "punk" enough.

Lingering

The bell rang loudly in the quiet apartment. Jihyo put down her coffee mug and walked to the door, wondering who it could be. She hadn't planned anything, she was sure of it, but lately work, school and band practice had been so taxing that she couldn't even be sure about being sure. She was too tired to remember everything.

Jihyo tip-toed so that she could look out of the peephole and when she did, palms pushed against the door frame, she froze.

"You forgot this," Momo said as Jihyo opened the door. The Japanese girl was carrying something black and Jihyo recognized her jacket immediately.

"Thanks, I hadn't noticed yet," she said as she reached out to take the piece of clothing from the other girl. They both smiled, but the smiles didn't reach their eyes.

"Do you wanna come in?"

"Oh, no, I can't. I have... plans," Momo said and fiddled with her car keys. She had pulled her hair into two high buns and looked like she was going out to have fun. Jihyo felt lousy in her sweater and shorts.

"But thanks for the earlier," Momo continued, fixing another sad smile on her face. "It's an old habit."

"That’s fine," Jihyo said and wished the girl would leave or come in -  this state in between was tearing her guts apart.

"Well, I'll see you around!"

"Yeah, see you. Thanks for bringing this," Jihyo said and lifted the jacket, but Momo was already walking down the stairs. When the girl had disappeared, Jihyo closed the door, but didn't move from the foyer. She lifted the jacket to her face and breathed in, trying to find any trace of Momo's scent.

"I miss you," she whispered.

Tortoise

Jihyo pushed Jeongyeon against a counter and deepened the kiss by dipping her head to one side. The older girl kept pulling at the collar of Jihyo's leather jacket so hard that she thought that her neck might break. Jihyo didn't know where her hands should have been so she let them be everywhere at once: pulling hips, caressing sides, up and down the chest. She had never known that hands could feel hunger, but they did now. So much hunger that her fingertips would have growled if they could have spoken. When she pushed her hands under Jeongyeon's shirt, the other girl went stiff. It wasn't a major change but even in her hazy state Jihyo felt it like a car crash.

Slowly, she pulled her hands back and calmed down, kissing more tenderly. A part of her still hoped that the fire in Jeongyeon would come back, but she knew that it was useless to hope. The older girl could be tough and cool, but she was also very sensitive and a line had just been breached. She had to listen to the things that she would never say out loud.

"You were right," Jeongyeon said as the kiss come to a reluctant end. Jihyo bit her lip and hold on to the other girl, but there was a distance that kept growing. If she had leaned in again, a massive black hole would have burst in between them.

"Next time I want to kiss you, remind me," the taller girl said and grinned, returning to her usual self: chill, clever and a little sad. But even as she stood there with her back against the wooden counter, with her hair all over the place and shirt in careless wrinkles, Jihyo saw the vulnerability clearer than anything else.

What are you so afraid of? she thought.

"You never listen," she said instead and flicked the older girl's shoulder playfully. When Jeongyeon feigned hurt she pulled away completely and turned around, hiding her face from sharp eyes.

"Do you have coffee in this place?" she asked and looked in to the cupboards, ignoring the lump deep in .

Take, Took, Taken

"So, you're Jihyo," Sana said and smiled, her eyes curving mischievously. "I have heard quite a lot about you."

"Clearly not all of it since you are here," Jihyo said and earned a delighted chuckle from the other girl.

"I might like bad girls more than good girls," Sana continued and leaned back on the car seat. She was wearing a simple black dress and her hair was in careful curls on her shoulders. She was very lovely.

"I am sure you do," Jihyo said and looked out for a moment, trying to concentrate on what she was supposed to do. "So, where do I take you? Jeongyeon wasn't exactly helpful."

"Here," Sana said and showed the location from her phone. Jihyo looked at it quickly and nodded. She already knew the way. She started the car and pulled on to the street, enjoying the feel of the new wheels on tarmac.

She asked Sana about herself and the girl began to talk freely, not leaving anything out - or so it seemed. Jihyo found herself laughing and smiling constantly, feeling light as the summer day around them. Sometimes, Sana would remark on something that they passed by and she seemed to be excited about everyone and everything. Her bright attitude was contagious and Jihyo saw familiar things with new eyes. How come she hadn't noticed these things before?

When they arrived to the destination, Jihyo was sorry to let her go. It probably showed on her face.

"Thank you so much," Sana said. "You are just as noble as everyone told me."

"I thought you liked bad girls," Jihyo joked and wasn't prepared for it when the other girl moved closer and pulled Jihyo by her shoulders.

"I love your jacket," Sana said and kissed her on the mouth. Jihyo wanted to kiss back but before she could quite start the other girl pulled away and left the car. Jihyo watched as she walked across the street and turned around before walking through a door. Sana waved at her and winked, disappearing into the building.

Jihyo promised herself she would get Sana's number one day, but she never did. Jeongyeon had gotten it first.

To Hell with Dogs

"So, that's why I will be going back home next week," Tzuyu explained from the other side of the table and made a marking on her note book.

"When do you come back?" Jihyo asked, holding herself in the icy classroom.

"I won't come back," the younger girl said and kept looking down.

What was she supposed to say to that? With Tzuyu, she could never figure out what to say if it wasn't related to the material they were working on. She could help Tzuyu with Korean but she could not help herself when the girl shot blunt remarks her way. She wasn't tutoring, she was playing dodgeball.

"You must be happy," Jihyo said and the classroom felt too large for them. It hadn't bothered her before, but now the walls seemed to fade in to distance.

"Yeah, I miss my dog," Tzuyu said and smiled a little.

"I will miss you," Jihyo said but at the same time an alarm went off and the piercing noise wiped away Jihyo's words like she had never said them at all.

"Oh, I forgot the fire drill was going to be today," Tzuyu said, got up and started packing her things. "Too bad my jacket is on the other side of the school."

"You can wear mine," Jihyo said and offered her leather jacket to the younger student.

"Thanks, but you need a jacket, too," Tzuyu said and smiled briefly. The kind, polite rejection dragged Jihyo down like a rock tied to her heart. Why couldn't she do this one last favor?

Instead, she stood in the school yard, watching the tall girl freezing in the chilly spring weather as she herself had a jacket to wear. After that she never saw Tzuyu again.

Months later she went to look at the girl's Instagram pictures. There were only pictures of dogs.

A Sorta Fairytale

The girl sitting next to her mumbled something in her sleep and moved so that her head fell on Jihyo's shoulder. She was only wearing a thin shirt and looked so cold that Jihyo took her jacket and placed it on the girl's shoulders. The leather wouldn't be exactly warm, but it was better than nothing in the plane where the air conditioning was always at maximum.

She was supposed to read a book, but after each page she would glance at the girl sleeping on her shoulder and forget what she had been reading. She made a deal with herself - finish the chapter and then put the book away - and managed to read a bit more.

She listened to the girl's light breathing and it lulled her to sleep, making the uncomfortable seat turn in to a hill. She was lying down under a huge tree, watching clouds drift by like ships made of cotton candy and dreams.

"Open your mouth," the girl said and Jihyo recognized her as the girl from the plane. She did as she was told and the beautiful girl fed her a strawberry. She couldn't really taste it, but knew that it was good, just like everything else in the dream.

"I love you," the girl said and Jihyo tried to say it back, but the words refused to come out. Instead, the girl leaned in and took her hand, holding it gently.

The hold tightened and turned into a grip and-

"We are landing," the girl in the plane said as Jihyo blinked, the dream fading in the back of her head. It was hard for her to put it away, like putting away a good book.

She meant to talk to the girl, but the plane landed roughly and once they got off, she never saw her again. Maybe she had had very little luggage, or had been in a hurry.

Jihyo didn't even know her name.

Work, Roses and Tears

The thing about Dahyun, that always confused Jihyo, was that she didn't know whether she liked the girl or just felt protective towards her. The younger girl was like a kitten with her bright energy and kindness that didn't expect anything in return. Of course, she was pretty, too. Jihyo had spent enough time watching the girl to know just exactly how pretty.

As she was always keeping an eye on the other girl, she noticed things that others might not have. That day something was clearly bothering her, as she served customers slightly awkwardly, with an evident strain in everything she did. Jihyo wondered what it was that made the girl look so tired of life, but work kept her busy all day and she didn't get a chance to talk to her.

Finally, the last hour turned in to last ten minutes and the shift came to an end. Jihyo left her place behind the counter and said a few words of encouragement to her co-workers who had come to the night shift. She had to bite her tongue so that she wouldn't start singing, because it was such a relief to be going home. However, as she came to the locker room, the song that had tickled left like a frightened bird.

Dahyun was sitting on the bench by the lockers and looking at her phone with a frown on her face. Jihyo went to her own locker and tried to will the curiosity away, but it was impossible when it was rooted in worry. She changed her clothes in silence and waited for the other girl to make a move. By the time when Jihyo was ready to go, Dahyun hadn't moved or said anything. Something was off.

"Dahyun, what's wrong?" Jihyo said and sat next to her on the bench. The pale beauty startled and Jihyo realized that she had been too occupied to even register her presence.

"Nothing, I just..." the girl started and tried to put her phone away only to realize that she was still wearing her work clothes which had no pockets. Jihyo watched the nervous fiddling and put her arm on the girl's shoulders, hoping that it would help to calm her down. In an instant, the girl melted and her lips began to wobble.

"I fought with... my..." she stammered, but couldn't finish her words as tears started rolling down her cheeks. Jihyo pulled her closer and felt no resistance.

"Unnie, you're always so nice," she whispered between tears and clutched the older girl’s shoulders. Jihyo caressed her hair which was currently blonde after Dahyun had tried several different hair colors in the past year. This one is my favorite, she thought and felt so much tenderness for the girl that it made her dizzy. She wanted to pull her into her lap and kiss the tears away.

"Better now?" she asked as Dahyun began to calm down. She had to start talking so that she wouldn't do anything stupid.

"Yeah," Dahyun said and pulled away, her eyes red and puffy.

"Why don't you get changed and we’ll get out of here?" Jihyo said as one of their co-workers came to the locker room to get something and looked at them curiously, before leaving again. It wasn't a good place to open-up and Jihyo wanted to get away.

Dahyun changed her clothes in silence while Jihyo stood waiting and staring at the back door. When the girl was ready, Jihyo turned and smiled at her, holding the door open.

As they stepped outside, they saw a young man standing in the end of the alley with a bouquet of roses. Dahyun sighed audibly and Jihyo turned to look at her profile, realizing that she wouldn't have to ask about Dahyun's tears or who she had fought with.

"Unnie-"

"It's fine, we'll talk another time," she said and smiled, giving the girl's arm a squeeze. "Make sure he feels sorry."

"Thank you," Dahyun said and her eyes shone again as they usually did. She would be all right.

Jihyo turned to other direction and left the young lovers to themselves. She didn't let herself glance back as she turned the corner and headed for the street, hands deep in the pockets of her leather jacket.

Ain't No Sunshine When She's Gone

"You'll be a dancer like mommy when you grow up," Momo said and lifted the baby's arms up and down as if there had been music playing the background. She bobbed her head from side to side and puffed her cheeks which made the baby giggle. It was a sound that made Momo giddy from joy, so she did it again and again and...

"What time is it?" Jihyo said and stepped out of the bedroom. Her hair was messy and the cardigan she was wearing kept falling down her shoulder. Momo had never seen anything more beautiful in her whole life.

"Almost eight. Feel better now?"

"I will, in a bit." Jihyo walked to the couch and sat down next to Momo who was holding the baby in her lap. Jihyo gave them both a kiss on the cheek and then leaned back, closing her eyes and enjoying the peace of the evening. Momo kept watching her, while the baby watched his mothers with his restless black eyes.

"Remember the day we got back together?" Momo asked, feeling suddenly nostalgic.

"How could I forget? You spilled beer on my jacket, you beautiful, sad drunk" Jihyo said dryly, but the corner of went up.

"Do you still have that jacket?" Momo remembered the jacket vividly. It had been an invaluable piece of clothing in Jihyo's youth. She had worn it almost around the year, even when the leather had always been too cool or too hot.

"It should be somewhere," Jihyo said and grinned at the memories which flooded her mind. "I bought it from Hong Kong when I turned eighteen. It has seen quite a bit of life after that."

The baby had had enough of reminiscing and began to make anxious whimpers and flail his chubby arms.

"He must be hungry," Jihyo said with a sigh, took the baby into her arms and lifted him to her .

Momo watched the feeding for the hundredth time, but it still made her quiet and humble. She couldn't quite understand how lucky she had gotten. It made her afraid to realize how much more she had to lose when her life was filled with love. How could she ever survive if all the happiness would be taken away?

"I know," Jihyo said suddenly and Momo looked up, meeting her wife's steady gaze. She nodded and they both knew just how much they loved each other.

The baby sighed happily.

A/N: Did that make any sense?? Anyways, I decided to update this collection as I am working on a longer Jitzu fic, which is here in case anyone is interested. Bye for now, kiddos! xo)