I felt the inside of my heart's wall cave in, clenching around the love Kai wanted to give me. It was an unexpected warmth ready to engulf her whole. My eyes filled with effulgence as my eyes formed endearing crescents, I felt like a child一 with eyes full of hope, perhaps false hope, but the silly me had no idea and was overjoyed with the mere moment. The call soon ended and the two of us continuosly sent messages back and forth, 

To Kai : 

"i- i did the confessing! so you do the asking!" 

From Kai : 

"okay! okay! I LIKE YOU A LOT. YOU LIKE ME A LOT. IT WOULD BE AN HONOR TO BE YOUR BOYFRIEND. WILL YOU BE MY GIRLFRIEND?" 

To Kai : 

"maybe"

I knew deep down just how much trouble I was getting into. Kai was not a normal neighborhood boy. He was tainted in many ways, his eyes have seen the cruellest forms of abuse and emotional abuse. He knew how to hold a gun as if it was his own child. He lived to serve. As to his words; I up how things are supposed to work. The word 'supposed' lingers in my memory like a rare drug, illusions and visions blurried by the effect. What was he supposed to do? Was it right to love me? I do not know. Was it a mere infatuation? Puppy love? It would be far too deep to call it a mere infatuation and far too long to be puppy love. He was my everything. A notice in the morning to enlighten my heart. Give my frail hands warmth and a reason to exist. 

I was known to be the kuro neko. The black cat: Misfortune. The same character I so loved in the anime; Shugo Chara, Ikuto. The unwanted child, the child chained to the family name by blood. Filthy blood. It was that very night, at the age of 6. Everything changed-

✦

Screams were heard from the front of the door and onwards, echoes lingering in the ear, piercing mentality. I hid beneath the bed, there was enough space for me to fit. I held onto my dear darling puppy. The only comfort surviving through this complex society.