You couldn’t tell anymore how many hands pushed you towards Siwon, Heechul and BoA at the end of the runway. Add to the fact the deafening scream of the audience repeating the word encore again and again. You have a feeling that the reason why they called you was because they want you to do the encore. 
Huh. No problem. You’re not the shy type. You’re not even humble, to be honest. You know your strengths and you like to show them off, but at the same time; you also know your weaknesses and that’s when you back off. Just like during the competition where you immediately put your hands up about dancing. You know when you can and when you can’t. Simple. But singing is something that you can, so why not?
Heechul pulled you in between him and Siwon who were encouraging the audience to keep chanting the magic word. 
Suddenly Minho came out of nowhere. “Kaela is from BoA Entertainment, right?” He brought it up again. “Does BoA Entertainment also have BoA Town Concert?”
You made a face and pretended to hit him but then everyone started talking about what you said on the finals once again. 
“Oh gurae?” 
“How do we get to BoA Entertainment too?”
“Maybe you need to have a dimple.”
“Where?”
“I have one but I can’t show it here.”
More laughter. 
BoA pulled you to her side and defended you. “Stay away from her, SM boys!” That just made everyone burst out laughing. 
“Yah, yah... She still needs to do an encore.” Siwon reminded and handed you a microphone. 
“What am I going to sing?” You asked. 
Then everyone started suggesting songs. Even the audience are screaming and you couldn’t make out what they’re saying because all of them are suggesting different things at the same time. But the SM boys wanted you to sing a musical song. 
The rest of the SNSD members have already gathered behind you. Taeyeon and Tiffany stood close to you. 
“You decide, because it’s your song. We just want to listen.” Taeyeon said excitedly.
“Please sing a musical song in acapella.” Tiffany suggested. 
You bit your lower lip and immediately tried to remember the roles you’ve portrayed as a child at school and thought of the first ever role you got in grade school. 
You raised your index finger once again, indicating you’ve already decided. “I will sing Little Mermaid’s Part of your world. Is that okay?”
Tiffany jumped in joy because obviously she knows the song. “That’s it! That’s it!”
Then they called everyone’s attention for you to start. Tiffany did the honor of introducing your song choice. Then people started shushing others as you get ready as if they’re really anticipating your song. 
“Look at this stuff, isn’t it neat? Wouldn’t you think my collection’s complete? Wouldn’t you think I’m the girl, the girl who has everything?” You laughed at the silence but you continued and you even tried to act out the part as much as you could remember. The looks on the other idols’ faces were of amusement and awe. You turned around just like Ariel did when she talked about her collection of human treasures she got from sunken ships all around her. “But who cares? Now big deal, I want more.” The dome was filled with your loud laughter when you noticed the boys pretending to be swimming. “Walking around on those- What do you call’em?” 
“Feet!” Tiffany said, giggling.
“Oh, feet!” You continued, holding on to Tiffany now standing beside you. “Strolling along down a- What’s that word again?” Tiffany playfully answered street. “Street... Up where they walk, up where they run. Up where they stay all day in the sun. Wandering free. Wish I could be, part of that world.” The belting part of the song is up next. The song was written in F major which is within your minimum belting range. Some parts that were originally in falsetto, you sung in head tone because you want to give your touch to it. When you were done, the boys were clapping exaggeratedly like seals and kneeling in front of you and you hid behind BoA’s shoulder pressing your face on her armpit as your face heated up in continuous laughter.
“We don’t know them.” You heard BoA said. “Let’s get out of here.” She pulled you back and out of the runway laughing at the boys’ playful protest at you two walking out on them. “Your voice is really a gem.” She pinched your cheek as you both walk holding hands to the right side of the stage to continue greeting the fans. “You are a gem. Some people say SM is superficial and we only care about our visuals, but you’re going to change their minds.” 
“You’re also a great vocalist, unnie-ah.” You told her. Well, in your opinion, SM really prioritizes the face and the talent next. That is why even though most SM artists are actually talented, but because they’re visually appealing and SM highlights it more, it’s the first thing people notices and not the talent itself. But the society have to admit that while they criticize SM for their preference, people are more drawn to idols that are pleasing to the eyes and not the ears since it can be auto-tuned anyway. Plus this is the entertainment industry where money lies heavily on image, unfortunately for the really talented ones, the music industry falls under the entertainment industry. 
Humbly, BoA made a face and shrugged. “Hmm, I’m not that bad.” Then both of you laughed. 
You pulled her to an embrace. The tightest you could make. “Ahniyo, you’re a total package.” And that is true. Although she’s not a power belter, she’s an icon and one of the leaders of the Hallyu wave that is now the K-pop that the current idols inherited. “Thank you so much, unnie. I hope we could do a duet soon.” 
“I’ll look forward to that.” She ran her hand over your spine so dotingly you wanted to purr and thought this might be how it feels to have an older sister. Then Ryeowook and Kyuhyun came out of nowhere and took a selfie with you two. 

$$$

“Mum, I’m okay. I’m fine. It won’t happen again.” You said as you paced back and forth in front of the mirror. While you were preparing to leave after you removed your make-up and changed clothes, your mother called to check up on you. The news has finally reached her of what happened this morning at the airport, and the reporter is most likely Rina who’s almost always on the internet. 
“It better not. If doing this means you’ll get harassed like that-” 
“Mum, it’s okay. We didn’t expect that, and no one wanted that to happen.” You countered. “Suri-unnie will have to report to SM tomorrow, I don’t know what’s going to happen but I’m worried for her.” Suri will have to explain in behalf of Songmin and Suri haven’t given up yet on giving Songmin the cold shoulder. “But it will be fine.”
You heard your mother sigh in resignation. She knows you well enough to know how persuasive you are when it comes to things that you strongly believe in. Your mother trust you enough to have faith in your judgment. She knows that you’re the type of person who doesn’t allow yourself to be aggrieved by anyone. And by anyone it means anyone. “I had a great time tonight.” You shared. About eight months ago when you told your mom you’re going to audition for K-pop Star, she was skeptical; not because of your dream to become a singer; she knows it’s inevitable, but because you promised to pursue it after you graduate from college and you’re only a sophomore. You’ve managed to convince her when you said that if you loose the competition, you’re gonna go back and finish college before you make another attempt. But you won so...
“That’s what’s important.” Your mom said and you can tell by the sound of her voice that she’s smiling and that made you smile too. You talked to your mom a little longer as you told her about how you’ve been treated so far by everyone until someone knocked on the door and Taeyeon’s small head peeked inside carefully and slowly at first but when she probably saw that you’re not or anything, she slipped her little body inside in a flash with her cheeky smile and then she noticed you’re holding the phone. 
“Oops, mianhe...” She covered that formed a small o. 
You smiled and walked towards her when she started to move to leave the room. “Mum, Taeyeon-unnie from Girls Generation is here. Please say hi.” You put the phone on speaker and your mother’s voice filled the air. You almost wanted to drop the call when your mother started telling Taeyeon to take care of you and to understand that you’re a little emotionally constipated at times and could come off as cold and rough who moves like a boy but that deep inside you’re so gentle and soft like a marshmallow and so on. “Umma!” You shrieked. 
Taeyeon started laughing and encouraging your mother to tell her more some things about you that she needs to be aware of ahead of time. You two ended up fighting for the phone and your mother was laughing like a witch on the other line. 
Later on, Taeyeon took pity on you and gave up getting the phone from your hand but instead started telling your mother that you’re both going to a get together dinner party for all SM artists and that she’ll make sure to take care of you like an older sister to her little sister. You realized this was what BoA was telling you earlier before your performance that didn’t quite register to you because you’re a little too distracted by adrenaline and a bit of nervousness. 

$$$

When you entered the hall, almost everyone’s already inside. It’s so loud and the noise and ruckus were being lead by the boys as the loudest were Super Junior and SHINee. You thought maybe it’s because they’re the sunbaes.
Throughout the night, Taeyeon didn’t leave your side just like she promised your mother and you ended up sitting at the SNSD table plus BoA. Heechul jokingly accused the girls of hogging you to themselves and they retorted that the boys will just make you a human-karaoke to which everyone who heard laughed at. Sadly, BoA had to leave early because of her schedule the next day. 
“Daebak, Kaela really have a great appetite.” Seohyun noticed and now everyone on the table are looking at you. “I saw how healthy your appetite is on Kpop Star.” You almost choked. You remembered that episode about how they showed clips of your eating habit in the dorm. 
“Kpop Star destroyed my image even before I managed to create one.” You murmured but it was loud enough for Taeyeon and Yoona to hear who started laughing. 
“But how do you remain so slim?” Sooyoung asked you.
You shrugged and swallowed before you spoke. “My mom said I have an active metabolism.” That’s the only thing you can come up with. 
Tiffany groaned. “Lucky you.” Then she shared about how easily she gains weight even when she watches what she eat most of the time and count her calorie intake. Sunny said it’s because she’s a cheater and the girls started a funny banter during the meal. Sooyoung expressed how she thought your accent when speaking Korean is really cute and speaking of accent, Tiffany conversed to you in English just to hear your British accent. To be honest, you don’t understand why people; even in Singapore, are so impressed with British accent. You don’t even think you have an accent. But then that’s because you’re in a foreign country and had the situation been reversed, they’d be the ones who’ll have accent when in England. 
Suddenly, as you were busy chewing, someone pinched your cheek and when you looked up, you saw it was actually Yoona smiling so charmingly at you. She was sitting next to Taeyeon on your left and she reached over to you to do that. “Yeppuda... I can’t help it.” She said, shaking her hands in the air in a giddy overdrive. You almost choked on what you’re eating because that compliment came from Yoona! She’s considered as one of Korea’s Goddesses. 
“Omo, you’re prettier unnie.” You said because she really is very pretty. The kind who gets prettier the more you stare. You don’t get the hype before but realized it’s actually different when in person. 
“Aish, don’t flatter me.” She shook her head. “Do you have a boyfriend?”
Hyoyeon laughed so hard at the question. “Yah! Im Yoona! Are you planning to join the other team?” She asked and you got what the other team means. 
The conversation on your table suddenly became so loud and you noticed the some people’s attention are now on your group. 
“Ahniyo, but if I were a boy I’d definitely date Kaela.” Yoona answered and her other members started teasing. “Just look at her!”
“The question is if Kaela wants to date you.” Sooyoung commented. 
Raising your hands, you waved it in the air. “Ahniyo. I just look foreign that’s why.”
Taeyeon caught your hands and pulled them back on your lap. “Did you know that there are a lot of people naming you as their ideal girl?”
That really made you laugh to hard. “Chincha? They’ve been fooled.”
Hyoyeon laughed so loud at that answer. “I like that.” 
Maybe you’ve been continuously shocking and entertaining them with your answers? Maybe it’s not how normal Korean girls speak but you’re not really raised in Korea so you should probably shut up now before you offend anyone. 
“Wait, Kaela hasn’t answered the question yet.” Sunny reminded everyone. 
You shook your head. “Ahniyo. I don’t have a boyfriend.” You answered.
“Do you prefer a Korean or British?” Yoona looked really interested, so Sunny started playfully teasing her again about how her new preference might have changed after her last heartbreak. 
You haven’t really thought about that. First of all, you don’t plan to submit to a boy and have yourself be fooled just like your mother had been. You know better. But they didn’t have to know that. “Love comes first.” You wanted to vomit right after you said that. That L word doesn’t taste good in your mouth. But really, you just don’t have any preference because you’re not interested. 
“Whoa, that’s so nice.” Seohyun commented so dreamily and you could tell she’s the romantic type. 
“Hear that, Taeyeon-ah?” Tiffany looked at their leader beside you meaningfully. The conversation next made you confused because it didn’t make any sense. 
“When all you do is lock yourself up in your room.” Yuri said.
“Yeah, yeah.” Taeyeon said in a sing-song way trying to dismiss the conversation.
“Whining about being single but how would you get off the market when you don’t even socialize?” Tiffany continued, trying to look so serious but failing miserably. 
Taeyeon beside you looked so mortified that her face crimsoned. 
“I don’t understand.” You said looking at the girl beside you who suddenly became restless in her seat as she tells her members to stop talking. “You and Baekhyun-” In a heartbeat, Taeyeon’s hand was covering your mouth. 
“Yah! Taengoo-yah, you surprised her!” Hyoyeon noticed.
“I’ll tell you, Kaela.” Sooyoung said.
“I’ll tell her later. Not here, Sooyoung-ah.” Taeyeon said looking so embarrassed. “I’ll tell you later, okay?” She told you in panic and you nodded. 
“It’s not true. They’re not really dating.” Sooyoung purposely ignored Taeyeon’s request but she lowered her voice knowing that the person they’re talking about is just a couple of tables away. “It was just something the company asked her to do to divert people’s attention from a lawsuit scandal that time.” Then she made a face. 
“Whoa. That’s a revelation.” You were truly surprised. 
Sooyoung explained with a little help from the other members that it was a request from the company that Taeyeon accepted because she’s that kind of person. She has the softest heart and has difficulty with saying ‘no’. It seems like you and Taeyeon have completely different personalities.
“Ah, that’s not right unnie-ah.” You told the older girl beside you. “Never let anyone take advantage of you. Some people see kindness as weakness and use it against you.” 
You caught Yuri looking so surprised at such comment to come from you. Perhaps they still see you as young and inexperienced. 
Tiffany added some more situations in the past where Taeyeon always put others first instead of herself. You could tell how Tiffany really cares for Taeyeon as she whines about how much of a people-pleaser their leader is and she sound so angry and frustrated because Taeyeon always ends up unhappy and hurt. “She worries about how others will think of her when she says no. But agreeing to that request from the management for another group’s sake did much worse to her self-esteem.”
The others agreed. The conversation felt too invasive for you because technically you’re still sort of a stranger to be involved in this kind of talk but somehow, you wanted to know more because you suddenly felt the need to protect Taeyeon who is such a sweetheart. You didn’t have to know her long to judge her because you could immediately tell that she’s a sensitive and kind person. Apparently, Taeyeon had been harassed verbally and even physically because of it when truth to the matter is it’s not even real.
“I’m not saying you should be selfish, unnie. It’s okay to be kind and giving but it’s not okay to be taken advantage of.” You suddenly felt so angry so you laughed at yourself. “Mianhamnida...” You said, because when you looked at your seniors, astonishment was written all over their faces. Except for Tiffany who completely looked so satisfied. “I’m a feminist.” You reasoned. 
Tiffany gave you a thumbs up saying that South Korea needs more people like you, sadly; the Korean culture have traditionally been treating women as inferior to men and are expected to be submissive without questions. 
“That won’t work for me. My songs are women-empowering and all about alpha-females, that’s my life’s purpose; to protect and empower women.” You declared. “I’m going to wake Korean girls up from this unjustness. Change is good as long as it’s for the better.” Now you’re making a speech when earlier everyone had to coax you to talk. Conversations like this makes you feel so alive. 
“Wohoo! I’m so excited for your songs, Kaela-yah.” Hyoyeon cheered for you. “I personally like Wake Up because it’s so realistic.” 
You smiled and thanked her for appreciating it. Taeyeon visibly relaxed beside you when the conversation went to your songwriting and SMs plans for you. You carried on with the conversation, giving them what they wanted only to save Taeyeon from being on the spotlight again. 
And so the night went by with more laughter and funny stories. However, throughout the evening, you caught Baekhyun looking at your direction several times. He kept on looking at Taeyeon. So, apparently, the relationship was a fake but maybe the feelings are real? You wondered if Taeyeon actually feels the same way. If Taeyeon feels the same way, he better treat her right. 

$$$

The trip back to Seoul was without any incident because this time SM gave you a proper entourage. By proper, it means five big security personnel. Immediately after you arrived at the apartment, Suri left for the SM headquarters after speaking to your mother. 
You helped your mother cook and bake something for everyone and when Suri came back later in the afternoon, you all feasted on the good food. Throughout the meal, Suri said that your schedule for the week has been finalized and that Songmin has an additional job of contacting the SM Security Team for backup whenever you have an event or public appearance. She said she got a warning and SM is really stern when it comes to mistakes and Suri shared the other manager’s experience when she was still assisting SHINee’s team. 
With the planner in your hand, you read your schedule for the week. You braced yourself. You have a full schedule. 

$$$

By Tuesday you went to tape the special episode for Kpop Star. You we’re so excited to meet Yoojin and Minyung again and when you finally saw each other, the nonstop catching up started in the dressing room and even while each of your make-up artists were busy with your faces until after your dinner when you all went out after the recording. You all met the others as well. The whole recording took five hours complete with the group interview and a lot of singing. 
By Wednesday was the turnover of your winnings. The confirmation of the bank transfer and as well as the delivery of the car that is now under your name. Hooray! Your very first- well not your first car because you have a car back in Singapore but it was just second hand, so this is your very first brand new car! You immediately did a test drive with your mother, Nawoon, Yunsoo and Suri as your passengers as you drove around the city.
You love driving so much that is why for your first dance practice for the McDonalds commercial come Thursday you convinced Suri that you won’t need Juwon to drive for you or anyone to come with you since you’re only going to SM and you promised not to drop by anywhere. You’re an independent girl, you like to do things by yourself without people following you every time. Well, except when maybe you’re going to have a performance or you’ll appear on TV you’d need help. But with everything else, you can do it by yourself thank you. 
You’re determined to have your way this time. You’re a stubborn person that is also very upfront. With what happened at the airport, you promised not to put yourself in the same situation again and flee even before it gets to that point. 
“But-” 
“Let her go.” Suri’s words have been cut off by your mothers’. “Kaela is self-reliant. She loves her freedom and she was raised that way. She doesn’t like to be babied. She’s very independent and I trust that she can take care of herself...” Then your mother turned to you with grave seriousness. “...trust her to call us when she needed help and to avoid situations that would put her in a compromising situation.” That sounded like a warning but nevertheless, because of that, Suri let you go alone.

$$$

Driving; for most, is a method of transportation, but for you, it’s something more. In your car, it’s just you, your machine and your music. Your hands on the wheel, literally controlling and leading you to your own destination. That sense of control is very therapeutic for you. Driving a manual car is the most fun way to drive just like your old car, but this one is automatic. Nevertheless, it’s very relaxing how you can control your speed. 
When you reached SM and parked the car on their designated car park beside the building, you got out of your car with your bag and phone on your ears. Suri is on the other line and you just told her that you arrived safely and without any hoo-hah and that she should stop worrying and go on a day off or something. 
There were some people who you think have already taken residence in front of the SM Building to catch a glimpse of SM artists but they were across the street as the building security doesn’t allow them to gather right in front of the building where they can cause disturbance. They were able to recognize you and have started screaming your name and did just that. They didn’t cross the street so you waved and smiled at them before you entered the building.
Suri instructed you to go to the studio on the 3rd floor where you are scheduled to practice for four hours. You greeted every staff and people that you come across with a smile and a bow. You dropped by the cafeteria first for a cup of coffee and a bottled water, bringing them with you in the studio to drink while you wait for the instructor since you’re a little early. You decided to be an hour ahead so you could stretch a bit. 
When you found the studio and pushed the door open with one hand, the wall blinds at the corner caught your attention first. It was of a bright blue sky filled with thick white clouds. The ceiling had rows of black connected pendant lights. As you pushed the door wider, you noticed someone was in the studio. At the very corner, someone was dancing right in front of the wall-mounted studio mirror. You can’t see his face because he has his jacket’s hood over his head but you were captivated by the familiar way the person dances. He was so delicate and graceful when he moves. His movements are so light and fluid, every step is a music note. His body speaks like his emotions are in sync with his body movement that you could feel the message just by watching him move. He looked totally lost and it’s so captivating to watch. 
You couldn’t hear any music but there’s no need to. His pants and his breaths sounded so attuned to his steps. You didn’t realize it was all over until you found yourself staring at a pair of deep brown orbs now looking so surprisingly at you. 
It was Jongin. Somehow he managed to make you speechless and a bit breathless even when you’re just standing there so stiffly in the overwhelming way that he danced. 
Jongin removed something from his ears and you realized he was listening to the music in his earphone.  
“Annyeonghaseyo.” He greeted you first and bowed a little. His voice freed you from the state of trance you were into earlier.
“Annyeonghaseyo.” You bowed and smiled at him afterwards. “Sorry for disturbing you. I didn’t know someone was here.” You said as you walk towards him who now stood suddenly uneasy on his feet. 
“Oh, don’t be sorry.” Jongin uttered, eyes dropping to your hand from your eyes.
“You dance so gracefully like you’re really dancing on top of the clouds. Your body looks so light and you moved so smoothly, I was speechless.” You blurted. That’s how much you admired his dancing skill. “I only wish I could dance a quarter as good as you.” You shrugged. “But I guess if I were to step on the cloud you’re dancing on, I would fall because I’m too heavy and uncoordinated.”
Jongin laughed. A hearty laugh that made you join him. “Kamsahamnida.” He said afterwards, flushing so cutely. 
“Have you been here early?” You asked him. It’s still 9am and it looks like he’s been here and dancing long enough to look spent and sweaty. 
“Seven-thirty.” He answered shyly.
“Do you always practice alone?” You asked again. Dancing alone is okay but he has a group so that just made you wonder. 
“Not usually.” He said and his eyes started to cloud, he ran his fingers through his hair causing for the hood of his jacket to fall off behind his head to reveal his face. You watched as his tongue wet his lips and your eyes suddenly focused on his really defined jawline when he tilted his head up a little, clenched his teeth together and his jaw muscles tightened. 
Wow. He look really rugged and handsome and you’ve surprised yourself because you’ve never admired any man this much. 
You slammed the door on those thoughts with a resounding bang. Deciding to focus on the frustration and anger that you could see in his eyes, you smiled at him. “You’re the best dancer I’ve ever seen.” You praised him once again. You don’t know if letting him know how good he is at what he is doing will help lessen his grievances but because it helps you, it might with him too. 
Jongin smiled while looking at you straight in the eyes for the first time. “Have you seen a lot of dancers in your life?” 
With the meaning of his question registering in your head; you rolled your eyes. “Why don’t you just say ‘kamsahamnida’?” You asked dryly, not caring to mask your disapproval of his reaction. 
Jongin laughed out loud his voice echoed inside the studio and you found being surrounded by it so good because his laughter is contagious. “Kamsahamnida.”
“There you go! How difficult was that?” You shook your head. 
“Ahniyo, not difficult at all.” He said. Now he’s no longer looking away. Maybe he’s already starting to get comfortable with you. The problem with shy people. Thankfully you’re not one of them. You don’t have any difficulty with approaching and holding a conversation with new people actually. The only thing is that, you don’t just approach anyone. Only people you find interesting. “Is it okay to ask you why you’re here?” Jongin asked carefully.
“McDonalds want me to dance for their commercial. Apparently they didn’t watch Kpop Star and failed to see how much I at it.” You said in an amusing but not too obvious way. 
Jongin chuckled. “I’ve seen that.” 
“Great.” So he knows how uncoordinated you are. You looked around and found a sofa on the farthest corner of the studio. 
“D-Do you want help?” You heard Jongin ask. 
You went to put your bag on the couch, with Jongin following closely behind you. “Help with what?” You asked after you put your bag down. 
Jongin ran his fingers through his hair once again and is back to looking at anything that is not your face. “I’ll- I can teach you how to dance properly.” 
The idea made you laugh. You’ll never be able to dance properly. “Decently, you mean.” You corrected him. “But they have a dance instructor. That’s why I’m here, I’m meeting him today.” 
Jongin’s face hardened shortly but he was back to looking at you in the eyes. “H-He’ll teach you the steps, but I’ll teach you some routines to make it easier for you to learn his steps. To make you dance gracefully.” He said.
That’s a great idea but- 
Jongin suddenly raised his index finger in the air like asking for a minute. He pulled his phone from his jacket’s pocket and you heard the sound of vibration before he answered it. “Ne, yeoboseyo?” He answered. “Arasso. Algesumnida. I’ll be home in fifteen minutes.” Well that was a very short conversation. Now he’s back to looking at you expectantly for your answer. “So...?” 
“You’re also busy, I don-”
“I’m not that busy for the next two weeks.” He said immediately. 
“Okay.” You agreed. It’s for your benefit anyway and he’s old enough to know what he’s doing. So if teaching you won’t be that much of a hassle for him, then it should be fine. 
Jongin smiled his boyish smile and handed you his phone. Even when he’s not saying anything, you know what it means. You rolled your eyes and saved your number in his phone. 

----o0o----