Your POV

“What’s up babe, what’s with the urgency?” The voice from the other line questioned. “I have to explain this face to face. Meet you at the café near your house. Bye.” You were in an absolute panic mode and couldn’t care less. So Hee will understand.

//~

So Hee stood up from her seat and waved at you when she saw you walking into the café. Your first reaction was to hug her. “What’s wrong? Did something happened?” So Hee’s voice trailed off as you started crying. “I.. Mark oppa.. dating.. JB..” You were not able to form complete sentences from the crying. She patted your back and calmed you down. “Hush, hush, calm down first okay?” You came to realise where you were and tried to stable your emotions. So Hee made you sat down and ordered your favourite hot chocolate. Sipping a few mouth of the hot chocolate, you felt better and your cries finally changed to a whimper.

“Now, tell me, what happened?” So Hee’s voice were filled with worries and concerns. Clasping onto her hands, you inhaled and exhaled a deep breath. “I’m dating Mark oppa now.” From the look on your best friend’s face, you knew that what you said gave her an extreme shock.

“Mark oppa confessed to me just now.” Giving you a nod, you knew that it was an okay sign for you to go on. You began filling her in with more details. “I was stunned when that happened. He told me that JB oppa’s words gave him the courage to confess to me. Oppa knew. He knew Mark was going to confess to me, but he didn’t stop him.” You took in another deep breath and continued. “I said yes to agitate him. I was angry at oppa for giving me up. I didn’t mean anything to him from the start. Now I’m guilty for having to make use of Mark oppa.” Your elbows were on the table and your face was buried in your palms. You were stressed up.

So Hee rustled your hair to ease your emotions. “Why not you be honest with Mark oppa? I don’t think it’s too late. He may be hurt by the truth, but that would be better than a lie..” You felt what So Hee said made sense. I shouldn’t drag Mark oppa into this. He’s innocent. Just then, you felt a buzz from your phone.

Text message from oppa <3:

Mark told us that you two are dating. Last long and Chu-ka hae.

You showed So Hee the text. She knew you’re hurting. There was a small silence between you two, until you broke it. “I’m not going to tell Mark oppa. I’ll make myself fall in love with him.”

“You’ve got to be kidding right?! You know that’s not possible and even if it is, it’s unfair for the both of you.” I know, I know. “You saw oppa’s attitude. Besides, I did felt my heart skipped a beat when Mark oppa confessed to me. Everything is possible right? I just have to try hard enough.”

There was a few minutes of silence. So Hee was deep in thought. “Maybe you’re right. You deserve to be happy. You’ve waited for JB for so long already. The number of guys you’ve rejected for him, it’s enough. You deserves someone who loves you.” Her words gave you reassurance for your actions. Even if it was a wrong move from the beginning, you knew you had to make it into a right one now. In fact, you were determined to. If oppa wants you to last long with Mark, you shouldn’t disappoint him right, and neither should you treat Mark oppa unfairly. I can do this.

You stood up from your seat and went over to So Hee. With open arms, you gave her a big hug. “Thank you. What would I do without you?” She returned your hug and gave you a really sweet reply. “What are best friends for?” Your eyes were still teary, but what So Hee said warmed your heart and brought a smile to your face. You couldn’t feel more grateful for her existence.

//~

“Why can’t I solve this stupid math question?!” It was past 11pm and you have been working on your math homework for close to 2 hours. Frustrated and tired, all you wanted was to get your homework done so you could end your day. You had no choice but to ask oppa for help since he was good at math.

Standing outside of his room, you thought to yourself. It won’t be awkward right? Just when you’re about to knock, the door opened. Shocked, you took a step back. “What’s up?” You pointed at your math homework and he knew immediately that you needed his help. “How did you know I was outside of your room?” You curiously asked. “I didn’t.” He answered your question as he walked towards the kitchen. “Just getting some water.”

“Oh..” Your voice trailed off. I’m just overthinking. You went into his room and placed the book on his study table. You flipped the pages to the question you needed help with while waiting for oppa to be back. It didn’t took him too long. Oppa did his best to teach you the questions but you just couldn’t understand. Those questions were not difficult. It was because your mind was filled with many other issues and that you couldn’t focus. “You’ve got to bring this over, and from this equation, you got to use this formula of trigonometry to solve it. From there, you could see that …” Soon after, oppa’s low deep voice became your lullaby and you couldn’t hear any other thing. Your mind floated off to dreamland without yourself knowing.

//~

The field was filled with dandelions and daisies. The red and orange sky made them dazzle with the colours of a fire, and the sky was an aroma of fire and warmth. The blowing of the wind on your cheeks were gentle and soothing. You couldn’t help but smile at the picturesque artwork nature drew. Standing up on your feet, you danced along with the flowers and weeds, letting your hair sway over your shoulders. A familiar figure caught your attention. You stopped and stood froze. His hand reached out to you and you were about to grab it.

You felt the ground, deep down, something was moving, pounding. A cluster of dark clouds began sitting above the field, the fury of it loomed over the fields, slowly engulfing the world. The pounding got stronger. An unsettling feeling began welling inside you. You knew something was not right and you were panicking. You saw objects began disappearing around you while the familiar figure turned his back towards you and ran away. The voice within you echoed to run. Your heart pounded to the beat of your feet racing over the hard ground. Sweat beaded your forehead, causing your hair to cling to it. He stopped and so did you. “Oppa.” You mouthed as you saw the figure’s face. Slowly, the figure vanished and the pounding on the ground gets weaker and weaker, except for the pounding of your heart.

Your eyes flashed open and you gasped for air. Sitting up, you slowly wiped the thin layer of sweat on your forehead and neck. It was just a dream. You realised that your dream portrayed your fear, which was losing him. Taking in multiple deep breaths, you got yourself settled and back to reality. Scanning the perimeter of the room, you were in oppa’s room. Oppa gave up his bed for you and slept hunching over his study table.

You flung your legs out of the bed and walked towards the sleeping figure. You saw the completed homework lying on the study table and smiled. Pabo-yah. Seeing that oppa only has his muscle tank and a jacket on, you covered him with his blanket, making sure you did not wake him up. Your hand couldn’t help themselves but reached out to caress his cheeks. “How is it possible for me to hate and love you so much?” You whispered. Realising where your thoughts were heading, you mentally cursed yourself for those words that you said. Giving a few light slaps to your cheeks, you tried hypnotising yourself. Kim Eun Jae, you should be loving Mark.