(play this if you want to cry)

Nathan's POV

*Knock* *Knock*

The door creaked opened, I looked at the door that disturbed the peacefulness of my dark and silent surrounding. "Nathan? It's time for breakfast." A warm but a voice filled with worry greeted me, but I could only wrap myself under the blanket and hug my knees tighter as the lights turn on. I covered myself in darkness when the light tries to rescue me from this sadness and pain, it's been like this for days. I would keep myself locked in this room in the dark with hurtful thoughts running through my head. I continue to bathe in regret and pain, the nightmares didn't help at all either. 

I heard a sighed in front of me, "Come on, Nathan you've got to eat." A hand then softly unwraps my blanket only to reveal the horrible state I was in. Dry tears, messy unwashed hair, white shirt filled with dark red spots that could easily be recognized as blood, and a face that has lost their meaning of life. Jennie's mother looked at me with eyes that showed dark circles underneath, she must be tired of me. She sat down beside me on the bed before wrapping her arms around me. "Honey... I know it's hard, but you're the one who's letting the pain continue to eat you up if you continue to shut yourself in the dark. I can't promise you that the pain will go away, but we're always here to offer our hands. You are not alone honey." 

She ran her hand down my head multiple times to comfort me, but I could only embrace her. "Auntie, I don't want to be in pain anymore but how? I can't forget my mother and I can't stop blaming myself. Every night, these... these... scary nightmares would come and haunt me. One minute I would be smiling happily with my mother and the next, she's gone." She continued to caress my back, "Honey, don't let those thoughts get to you. Don't blame yourself, any mother would do the same thing for their child. They'd sacrifice everything just to save their child, that's what a mother's love is." By now, I finally found comfort in her arms as I cry. "Am I really worth saving?" She then wipes my tears, "You are a hundred times worth it. Especially in Bella's eyes, you are her greatest treasure." Tears streamed down my face once more making everything blurry due to the clouds forming within my eyes. 

She just embraced me until I finally calmed down, she then brought me to the washroom, "Now, let's take a bath okay? You've locked yourself in this room for way too long. It's time to go outside, we can't keep placing the food in your room in order for you to stay inside." She helped undress me up to my underwear of course, "Now don't be afraid okay? The water will not hurt you, look." She sprinkled water to her face before laughing, the smile on her reminded me of my mother. The times when I was only 1-2 years old and she'd take baths with me because I didn't like taking baths, but I grew to love it because not only did I spent time with my mother but we would joke around and splash each other. The smiles on our faces couldn't even be any happier, but those moments shortly lasted due to her responsibilities, she had gotten back to her busy work life along with father.

I looked at the water, I knew it meant no harm but it almost took away my life. I shook my head, "I'm sorry, I can't." I grabbed my clothes and ran out back to my room. I put back the clothes on and wrapped myself under the blanket, but before I could fully wrap myself. A little girl grabbed my hand, "Nat-Nat Let's go! We're going to go see Bada~" She then quickly dragged me out of my room, the house and we ran outside until we made it to the beach. She ran straight to the water as she dragged me behind her, I suddenly felt weak, I couldn't control my body. As soon as the water hit my feet, fears ran through my head. I grew anxious as if I was going to go on another panic attack, I clutch my chest as my body began to tremble and my breathing becomes shallow.

Jennie let go of my hand as she continued to run to the water, I kneeled down as I try to catch my breath again. I closed my eyes, as I take in the peaceful sound of the beach that surrounds me, "Nat-Nat see bada is nice!" I opened my eyes to see Jennie with a huge smile on her face as she runs through the tiny waves. She then ran towards me without missing her smile, she bents down. "It's not scary, I promise. I'll protect you, the princess will protect her prince as well. Just breath. Just breath." She extends her hand and practiced breathing. I don't know what happened but the knot I felt on my throat disappeared and I managed to catch my breathe, as if in that instant my fears begin to go away, simply just by seeing her genuine happy smile. I took her hand, and she then places my hands under the cold water that felt refreshing on my skin. 

"It's not scary, see." I looked down at my hand... She was right, the water isn't dangerous... at least in this amount. I then felt a huge splash on my face, I was taken in surprise but then I looked up to see Jennie laughing at me. "See it's harmless so don't be afraid of bada~ Bada~" She ran around the water as she splashes some more at me, I wiped my faces. For the first time, a laugh escaped my mouth as I ran after her. "Yah! You're going to get it from me!" I ran after her and splashed her back. "Kya! I'm not going to lose!" She splashed the water back at me as we continue to play with the water. I don't know what has gotten with me, but I think I found another reason to tolerate water again... It felt just like when my mother and I played with water. She was right, after all, Bada isn't as scary as I thought, not when it can be this fun. 

The Next Months

Step by step, every single day, I would dip my feet under water by the beach that it's become my daily morning routine. I've learned to fight off my fear each day little by little until I've gone underwater all the way to the top. It was scary, but Jennie was there holding my hand every single day, she wouldn't leave for school until after she had accompanied me. "I bet I can hold my breath underwater longer than you?" Jennie exclaimed I rolled my eyes along with a smirk on my face as I don't believe a word she says. "Oh really?" I said sarcastically. "You wanna bet!?" She scrunches her nose as she glare at me, but it was too cute to be one. "You got one." I can't back down from a challenge.

After dipping under the water, I quickly stood up to see Jennie underwater still. I chuckle before dipping down again after a few seconds, I then felt her rise up as soon as I got down. I stayed down for a couple more seconds before rising up as I wrapped my arms around her waist to bring her up along with me, "See! I won pabo." She screamed as I spin her around, "Kya! Alright! Alright! You won! Just put me down!" She laughs as she hit my shoulder. Another smirk showed up on my face before letting go of her waist letting her fall on me, she screamed in fright before she got up from the water with another cute glare. "Yah! Now you're in trouble!" I quickly ran out of her reach as she starts chasing me, "You asked for it though!" I yelled back at her in my defense. 

"Still! You shouldn't treat a girl like that!" She yelled as she swings her arm around ready to hit me like it was some weapon from the Viking era. I finally stop running, but I guess she wasn't expecting me to stop as she hits my back. "Ow~" She fell down the water once more, I turn around and kneeled down as I stare into her beautiful brown eyes. "Wha---What are you---" I leaned closer to her face until we're only inches apart, her eyes were so alluring that I began to think selfishly as possessive thoughts engulfed my mind. I leaned just a tiny bit closer that I could literally feel her breathe on my lips, "You're right... I shouldn't treat a girl like that..." I spoke quietly as I whispered to her as small waves continued to hit us softly. "But you're special. You're my Noona. You're my NiNi." I pinched her nose as I laughed at her hilarious face who's in beyond shock as if she was expecting something else. 

After she realizes my joke, she bit her lip as she glares at me before splashing water at me multiple times that it was my turn to fall on the water. "NiNi! It's just a joke! Chill haha!" I splash water back to her until, "Nathan! Jennie! It's time for breakfast!" Jennie's mother called, we ran out of the water and into her arms as she wipes us down. We went back to their house and took a shower before running down to the dining room to have breakfast. As we're eating, Mr. Kim, Jennie's father spoke. "I was thinking, Nathan, I think you're ready to attend school? Don't you want to go to school with Jennie?" Mrs. Kim then stood up and came back with a male uniform in her hand. I smiled, "Really?" They both smiled as they nod, I let go of the spoon making a clunking sound before running to hug Mrs. Kim. "Thank you. Thank you so much."

She giggles before rubbing my back to return the hug. Jennie and Mr. Kim watched us with smiles on their faces. "Nathan, why don't you go try it?" Mr. Kim suggested, I smiled widely before taking the uniform and running to the washroom to change. I excitedly slip on the clothes as fast as I can before running back to the kitchen to show off my new clothing as if I just won a trophy. Which earned waves of laughter and giggle among the family, Mrs. Kim then kneels down to my face as she fixes my tie and hair, I slow smile forms down my face as the familiar feeling resurfaces through her motherly touches. "Perfect! Ain't he the most handsome Jennie?" We both looked at Jennie who gave me a huge smile along with a nod. I smiled back before I felt Mr. Kim ruffle my hair, messing up Mrs. Kim hard work. "How about we play a game of basketball sport? I've always wanted a son to play with." My pout was replaced with an eager nod as my excited heart took over me again.

He then lifts me up as he grabs my stomach and carries me, "Alright! You guys are free to join us as well." With that, Mr. Kim and I left to play ball at a nearby park. Mr. Kim and I shot around the court, well mostly me as he kept carrying me up so I could dunk or reach the ball when I throw although I can shot it myself. It just felt nice being on his shoulders. We both had wide smiles on our faces, as we manage to get the ball through the hoop, it was just full of fun and joy. Now, this was an unfamiliar feeling, as the features of Mr. Kim's face glows with the help of his smile, he had a smile that suited a father looking at his child. 

The smile, I could only find in movies, a smile I could find in Uncle Kim, and a smile I could never see on my own father's face. A few moments later, Mrs. Kim and Jennie followed along to bring a picnic basket. They called us over to eat, and before I knew it we were all sitting with genuine laughter coming out our mouths as we try to chew with our food. At this moment, I truly felt happy, the first time in a long while...

On Monday

"Nathan, let's go." Jennie held her hand towards me, I smiled as I take her hand in mine as I follow her to her classroom. Before we get there, all her classmates were already in the classroom but us as we waited for the teacher. It wasn't long till I heard footsteps coming towards me, I look up to see a blonde man with specs along with a tie and dress pants. His whole outfit was just screaming sophisticated, I mean he had the looks for it. He wasn't as handsome as my dad, but he could still manage to get any girl off her feet with his smile. As soon as he made it in front of us, he kneeled down on the ground and gave me a prince charming smile. "Hey kiddo, so you're Nathan Kang? I'm Mr. Johnson, Nice to meet you if you have any questions I'm always here." He ruffled my hair, he then smiles at Jennie before standing up. I smiled back, "Now shall we head inside?" 

He opened the door, Jennie then finally let goes of my hand and we followed him inside. I couldn't lie to myself, I miss the warmness of her hand and my smile fell as soon as she left me to sit at her seat. I was left alone at the front of the classroom as I followed Mr. Johnson, I looked at the rest of the class to look away from Jennie to distract the painful feeling growing down my chest. "Alright, kids listen, a new student will join us. Go ahead kiddo introduce yourself."  He looked at me, "Hey, my names Nathan Kang." I smiled at the kids who looked at me with eyes full of curiosity while some couldn't care less. 

After the introduction, I was told to sit down beside a boy with golden locks. "Hey my name's Kyle, do you want to play basketball during lunch time?" He held his hand out, he seemed nice so I shook it and nod my head. "Sure." Time flew by, and I couldn't help but fall asleep, I woke up right away though as soon as I fell asleep when I heard tapping on my desk. I looked up to see Mr. Johnson smiling, "No sleeping in class Nathan or you can continue your sleep in detention." I nod, Mr. Johnson then went back to the front to teach the class. I heard a chuckle beside me to see Kyle laughing at me. I rolled my eyes, "Gee, thanks for the warning." He hits my arm, "Bro, that's no fun though." 

I rolled my eyes and just doze off in class while trying not to fall asleep, although it felt like forever, lunchtime arrived. Kyle introduced me to his friends before we ran outside to the field to play soccer. At first, we were split into teams but throughout the whole game it ended up with 1 vs. all as everyone tries to get the ball away from me but I wasn't my team's lucky charm for nothing as I avoided all of them and perfectly kicked the ball to the goal effortlessly.  

After that day, everyone suddenly wants to be my friend. I started gaining a huge group of friends that we were considered the popular kids all thanks to Kyle, I know this situation might be what teens called fitting in. I feel like I'm bragging but I'm not, It's been months but everyone continues to shower me with attention. I receive lots of confessions, but I turn them all down because I'm not looking for a relationship. I'm here to be a kid and a student, I'm here to experience a normal life and maybe love can be something in line for the future but not now.

Everything was great, but there was only one problem... Jennie and I don't talk when we're at school but once were at home it's like the world is ours. Every time I approach her at school, she'd avoid me. I tried to ask her at home, but she'd just change the subject. Lately, she's been avoiding me at home as well, it feels like I lost my princess. We're growing apart and I don't know what to do, I'm always trying to reach her, but she's always trying to get away...

I sighed, I finally finish basketball practice, I was too lazy to change out of my jersey since it's nice outside so I went straight to the class instead where Jennie was waiting for me. But as soon as I got there, Jennie was on the ground crying while two girls pull her hair and kept punching her. "Yah! What do you think you're doing!?" I pulled the girls off Jennie and kneeled down to face her, the corner of her lips were bleeding.

Her face glistening with tears. "Are you okay? What happened?" I looked up to see the girls look down on us with their faces filled with guilt and fear. "What the hell do you think you're doing to her!?" I stood up and glared at the two as I clenched my hands trying to control my anger. "You ! Stop hitting on Nathan, he's way too good for you!" One of the girls just snapped and tried to hit Jennie again.

But I blocked her, "Don't you dare touch her or I'll---" I didn't continue my sentence or I don't know what I'll end up doing to her. "Why are you protecting her Nathan!? She's just a poor, ugly, nerdy, asian girl." The girl's friend freaked out. "And you two are no better than her, she's far greater than what you assume she is. She's the princess who always comes to rescue her knight when it should be the other way around. She's stronger than me, she's the one who stayed beside me through my darkest times. You have no right to hurt her. So if I see even a scratch on her again, you will not only be facing expulsion but my fist. I'm not afraid to hurt both of you seeing as you showed no mercy for Jennie." I grabbed one of the girls' collars as she shivers in fear. 

"Na---Nathan that's enough. I'm okay." Jennie grabbed my hand, calming me down. I sighed as I closed my eyes before letting her go, she immediately ran outside the classroom. I aggressively ran my hand through my hair, feeling the sharpness of my nails digging deep down my skin, "Is this why you've been avoiding me at school? How long has this been going on Jennie!? Why didn't you tell me anything!?" Jennie became mute, I looked at all the bruises on her delicate face, arms, knees and she's probably hiding more bruises under her shirts seeing as I've only noticed them now. You could see which were recent and some are slowly fading. 

I sighed once more before I could hold back a teardrop from escaping as my chest tightens, "Jennie... I'm sorry this is all my fault, why haven't I noticed anything? I'm so stupid." Jennie cupped my face as she wipes my tear, "Hey, you may be stupid but this isn't your fault. I'm sorry I didn't tell you... You just looked so happy, I  don't want you to lose your smile again." I looked down to see her trying to hold back her tears, of all things why are you putting my happiness before you, she truly is my princess. She can even be part of those Disney princesses as she has a heart of gold.

I wrapped my arms around her. "Hey, I'm supposed to protect you though. Jennie if I'm going to be your knight, you have to tell me if anything like this happens again, but for now... Are you okay? If it hurts... It's okay to cry because this will be the last time I'll let this happen. From now on, I'll always be with you okay?" I felt her nuzzle on my neck as she nods, I smile. "No more secrets okay?" She nods again, and we just continued to hug as I felt the sunset behind me.

The next few days

"Jennie wait up~" I whined as I run after her, but she continues to walk fast. "Hurry up stupid~" She teased as she stuck her tongue at me before tightening her hold on her books and walks faster. I rolled my eyes before continue to run after her until we made it to the garden, she then sits under her favorite tree. It wasn't special or anything, she just loved how normal it was just like the other trees, plus it perfectly covered her from the sun. I lazily slid my back down to sit beside her, she then lays her head on my shoulder as she opens her book. I just made myself comfortable, but it wasn't hard as being with her was enough to make me happy.

I cut all my friends off as soon as I found out that they were bullying Jennie as well, like who needs fake friends when I got my princess beside me. I quit all my clubs so I could spend more time with Jennie, and it helped because it mended our broken bond. Jennie and I are closer than we ever were, every day during lunch we'd sit under this tree so she can read and so I can sleep.  From time to time, when I accidentally wake up, I pretend to sleep just to secretly catch glimpse of her smile when she finds an amusing part of the book which was often. She loved to read books, but I don't get why she's always hiding that fact when it's one of the things I love about her. I closed my eyes and soon enough I fell into deep sleep.

Once school finishes, I excitedly pick up Jennie's bag as we make our way home. It was one of the thing's I've enjoyed ever since I came to New Zealand, after all, it was the only time I could talk to Jennie before, I looked at Jennie who rolled her eyes as she tries to grab her bag but I held it up high until she gave up. I stuck my tongue at her, before grabbing her hand and dragging her outside the classroom hand in hand. A