Here is a quite big chapter :D ! It will be the only one this week because I am a dance competition this weekend so I need to rehearse a lot ..! I wanted to thank all of you for your comments, I love reading them they make me so happy ^o^ ! I hope you will like this new chapter ~

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Jiyong’s POV

Usually I hated long flights, I could not move as I wanted and my body was hurting. But this time was different, I did not wanted the plane to land. This trip was supposed to be fun, it was for a fashion runway. Fashion was my second favorite thing after music and being able to participate to such in event in Paris the fashion’s capital has always been my dream. Even though it was not my first time in France I was as excited as I was the first time I went there. But one little thing or should I say a big thing kept me from be happy. This thing was a person. A person that I really did not wanted to see. I guess this person was the reason why my personality changed so much lately. I did not realized how bad it was until yesterday when I had a fight with Youngbae. He was my best friend, how could I slap him like I did? It was the first time we fought that bad. I was so sorry about it but I was too ashamed to tell him. I thought about sending him a text but it was not enough in a case like this. There was one more person who did not leave my mind since the day before yesterday, it was Seungri.

Unlike what I was showing, I was deadly worried about him. I knew exactly how he was feeling right now, I knew him so well. Since I was the person who knew him the best I was always the one to care of him when bad things were happening. Sometimes when scandals were happening I was tough with him but it was for his own sake. But this time what he needed was not to be scolded but to be surrounded by his loved one. I was so worried he was alone by himself because his parents told me earlier on the phone they could not come before three or four days. Youngbae was probably by his side at this hour, at least I hoped he was, I trusted him to take care of our Maknae. He was the one helping me when I had hard times so he could do the same for him since they are close enough. But the thing is that I wanted to be the one next to him. I wanted to be a great leader, a leader that takes good care of s but also a friend. A friend who is always there when you are having hard times. But for now it was impossible. I needed to stay as far as possible away from him or really bad things could happen. With all these thoughts in my mind I did not have a peaceful sleep during the flight and I was exhausted when I arrived in Paris. I was relieved when I did not see the person in the airport waiting for me, maybe the person forgot about me. I took a few steps in the airport when I suddenly felt a hand on my shoulder, I stopped breathing.

Seungri’s POV

I was lying down but I was dizzy. My eyelids were heavy, I had no desire to open them but a pressure on my hand seemed to tell me to wake up. Even though I was exhausted I managed to open my eyes. The first thing I saw when I woke up was Youngbae’s face.

“- Here you go Maknae, glad to have you back with us.”

I tried to give him a smile but the thing on my face did not allowed me to do it, I figured out that it must be the oxygen mask. I tried to take it off but he gave me a serious glare.

“- Don’t even think about it, you should not have taken it off in a first place, now you are keeping it.”

I was a little bit confused, I could not exactly remember what happened. I was watching TV then my stomach became painful, I felt nauseous and I asked my hyung to go out not to see I was not feeling well and that was all. I tried to take the mask off one more time but he immediately put it back. I was kind of annoyed, this thing was painful and I could not talk with it, I wanted to know what happened and why I was feeling so sleepy. I grabbed Youngbae’s hand to make him understand that I wanted so explanations.

“- You don’t remember what happened, do you?”

I shook my head weakly.

“- You wanted me to buy you something to eat so I went to the cafeteria and when I came back you were throwing up blood and then you collapsed on me.”

I covered my eyes with my hands. My plan to show them that I was fine was a failure. Obviously I was not. I should have taken it slower, I hate the hospital and I did not want to stay there for more than one week. Big Bang was supposed to do the closing ceremony of the Incheon games then another concert and I really wanted to be a part of it too but it seemed that I will not. I felt tears forming in my eyes. Youngbae gently squeezed my leg.

“- Come on, don’t worry too much, you’ll be fixed in no time! I know you want to do the closing ceremony, maybe you will. But you have to stop acting so stubborn. You don’t have to hide anything from me. If you want to cry or if you are in pain just tell me, I will be there to comfort you. I will visit you as much as I can.  I know I am not Jiyong but I will try my best to help you, okay? Now, rest.”

This day I cried a lot. I let out what I had in my heart. I was scared, I was hurt and I was sad, it seemed that everything was going wrong in my life lately; first Jiyong and then this. Why does it have to be me?

During the week after I did exactly what I was told to. The incident of the other day allowed the doctors to know what was wrong with my liver and I could get the appropriate medication. Without lying I could say that I was doing fine.  Six days ago I was moved to a regular room and two days ago I could get out of my room and start wandering in the cafeteria with the members who came to see me. And today was the day, I was finally free. I could go back to the dorms. My parents who came back to Korea wanted me to rest for a couple more days at home but I could not wait to go back to the dorms. Today was also the day Jiyong hyung was coming back from Paris. I did not have any news from him but Youngbae hyung said he called several times to know how I was doing. When I asked him why he did not call me directly he used the excuse he did not want to bother me and let me rest. I was looking foward to see him. I was scared of his reaction, I knew I would be scold. But it was not bad right? If he scolds me it means he really cares. Just when I was done packing my stuffs I heard someone knocked on the door. Youngbae hyung entered.

“- Is Lee Seunghyun-ssi ready to go home?”

I nodded happily and put my bag around my neck. He took it off and put it around his neck.

“- Don’t overdo it! Are you sure you don’t to stay a little bit longer? You are a fast learner, you could catch up with us easily even if you miss the two first days you know…

- Hyung! If I am well enough to go back to practice I am well enough to carry my own bag, come on give it back! And don’t worry, I will rest tonight and I will be careful.”

His raised his shoulders and left the room, my bag still around his neck. I left the room after him. I was so happy to leave this place. I hated being a burden; each day one of my hyung was coming to see me and I could tell how tired they were. I did not want anybody to worry about me anymore. I will work hard to do well at the closing ceremony and to show everyone what I was capable of.

I could not contain my joy when we arrived at the dorms. The elevator has never been so slow. Once we arrived at our dorms’ floor I ran towards the door and opened it energetically. I looked at the entrance’s floor; Jiyong’s slippers were not here anymore, he was already home. I quickly took off my shoes and ran in the living room. Daesung hyung was cooking in the kitchen, TOP hyung watching TV and Jiyong hyung was lying next to him, he was probably sleeping, he must be tired because of the jetlag.

“- I’m home!”

As soon as they saw me, Daesung hyung and TOP hyung came to me and hugged me.

“- It is nice to have you home Maknae, it was too quiet in here!”

I hugged them back and apologized for causing so many troubles. Fortunately they were not mad at me. We talked for few minutes then they went back to their occupations. I looked over the sofa, Jiyong did not move at all, I could not tell if he was ignoring me or if he was still sleeping. I decided to follow Daesung in the kitchen and not to think too much about the awkward situation. I was so touched when I saw what he was cooking, it was my favorite dish.

“- Thank you Hyung, I really appreciate it.”

He showed me his prettiest smile and patted my back.

“- I know we are not that close but I really wanted to do something for you and show you how relieved I am. Please stay healthy from now on.”

I promised that I will and thanked him again before going back in the living room. TOP was not here anymore, Jiyong hyung and I were alone in the room. I quietly approached the sofa and sat on it. I shook his legs softly, he did not wake up. I shook them a little bit harder but still no reactions. I wanted him to wake up, we needed to talk, I wanted the things to get back to normal. I knew I was being impatient but I could not wait, he made me waited so long. I put my hands on his waist and shook him harder this time. He opened his eyes, surprised.

“- What are you doing?”

I covered my body with my arms the same way I always did when I was teasing him, in case he wanted to revenge. His eyes became big when he saw me.

“- Oh! Seunghyun-ah! How are… What are you doing? Did not you see I was sleeping?”

The smile which was forming on my face faded quickly. For a second I was sure he was happy to see me but his expression suddenly changed. My heart was hurting, why was he repulsing me?

“- Hyung I know you are mad at me, I am really sorry, please let me a chance to explain… I need to talk to you, not only about the accident but about our rela…

- I am glad you are okay. You should eat and get some sleep, tomorrow’s day is going to be rough. You do want to slow us down right?”

I was taken aback but I managed to nod my head. I was about to cry. I wanted him to tease me, to make me laugh, to hug me to lighten the mood like he always did. I could not move, I stayed on the sofa for few minutes, looking at my feet. Since when were we like this? I tried to think about all the things which happened lately and I could not recall doing something wrong. Something wrong enough to make him hate me. Two feet appeared next to mine. I lifted my head to discover the kindly face of Youngbae hyung.

“- Seunghyun-ah, TOP is done showering, you can go now, hurry up the dinner is almost ready.”

The evening went pretty well if we forget the fact that Jiyong did not talk to me or looked at me once. But I tried to interact as much as I could with the other, pretending that everything was fine.

As predicted, the rehearsals days were pretty rough and I was completely exhausted. My body was still weak but I was doing my best to be as the same level as the other. Even though I was being careful my liver was still hurting me and the painkillers became more useful than ever. This Thursday’s night was not very different from this other, the members were also exhausted and when we arrived home we all went to our rooms without talking. I could not tell anyone but the situation between Jiyong and I was becoming more and more difficult to handle. I haven’t done any mistakes since the beginning of the rehearsals and even increase the amount of the pills I was taking, and still it was not enough. But today I decided to act differently, I kept doing mistakes and said that I was not feeling well, causing the other to worry about me but the concerned hyung did not say anything. He just kept practicing on his own without looking at me. It was too much. I could not stay in the same house as him, I needed to have a break. I waited one hour to be sure that everyone was sleeping and stepped out of my room. All the lights were off and I walked to the entrance’s door in the dark, using my phone to direct me.

Once in the street I put a mask on my face and put a cap and my hood on my head, I should not be recognized. It was really late, almost 2am and the only shops which remained opened were bars. I stopped in front of one. I knew it was a bad idea but I really needed a drink to forget my sadness and I was just few meters away from home. After weighing up the pros and cons I decided to go in. I took one drink, then two, then three and then I stopped counting. I wanting to keep drinking but the owner of the shop asked me to leave. Even though I was quiet drunk I did not take long to back to the dorms. In front of the door I looked for my keys but I could not find them, my pockets were empty. My ideas were not clear but I remembered putting my hat on the table then my keys in them; but my cap was not on my head anymore, I must have forgot it at the shop. I was too tired and too drunk to go back. Without thinking I started banging on the door. No one answered, I was locked outside.

Since I was a celebrity I could not sleep in the corridor so I made up my mind and went back to the shop with difficulty. Unfortunately when I arrived the place was closed. As if my situation was not bad enough, the rain started to fall. It only took me three minutes to get completely wet. I sat on the little stair in front of the shop and took my phone out. There was only one person I could call, the person who never cut off his phone at night. I knew it because when we were sleeping together, I kept getting annoyed by his ringing.

I pressed the “1” touch and Jiyong hyung number appeared. I was praying for him to pick up.  It did not take long for him to answer my call. After few seconds of silence, I finally heard his sleepy voice.

“- What is it ?

- Hy-Hyung… I need your help…

- Just call someone else, I am sleeping.

- No Hyung! Don’t hang up please. I am in the street hyung, I think I am drunk. I forgot my keys at the shop where I drank and now it is closed. I am too tired to come back home. I really need you…

- Wait… What!? Where are you?

- In the street, just few meters away from the dorms… We already drink at this place together, do you remember?

- I know where it is, don’t move, I’m coming.”

I put the phone in my pocket and rested my head on the wall, he was coming to get me. I started to get sleepy when I heard someone calling my name. I stood up and moved my arms to allow him to see me in the heavy rain. I saw him running towards me. When he was close enough I hugged him.

“- Hyung, I knew you would come…

- Shut up Lee Seunghyun, you are drunk. Why did you do that!?

- Because of you hyung, I wanted you to notice me. See, it worked!

- Stop talking none sense, we need to go back home, hurry.”

I did not want to let go of his hug. Not only because it was comfortable but because I was too dizzy and too weak to stand by myself. I started to shake, I was hot and cold at the same time.

“- Hyung, when did it become so cold?”

He looked at me, a worried look on his face. He put his palm on my forehead.

“- God Seunghyun-ah you’re burning! Can you walk to the dorms?”

I tried to make a step but I failed and fell into my hyung’s embrace. He helped me sit on the floor.

“- Hang on! I told Youngbae I was coming to get you. I’ll call him and ask him to help us.”

I was listening to half of what he was saying, I was so tired, I just wanted to sleep.

“- Lee Seunghyun it is not the moment to sleep, stay with me!”

He gently slapped my cheeks while talking on the phone with Youngbae hyung. He squatted down in front of me and kept talking to me. His body was wet too, I did not want him to be sick. He suddenly stood up. Youngbae Hyung was here, I could hear his voice.

“-Jiyong! You will explain everything to me later but now put him on my back!”

As he was told, Jiyong helped me to get on Youngbae’s back and they both started running. I could feel his hand in my back, preventing me to fall. He was finally looking at me and talking to me.

“-Wait a little bit more Seunghyun-ah, we are almost home!”