Kris pulled himself out of bed for the last day of work before himself and Lay would receive their second monthly pay check.  He smiled feebly at Lay who was awake in bed reading a Korean phrase book before walking into the kitchen and making himself a cup of coffee.

“Why are you up so early?” Lay called out to him. “Get some sleep! Work doesn’t start until 10am and it’s only 8!”

“I just want to go out somewhere first.” Kris called back.

“You’ve been going out earlier every day this week! Where are you going?” Lay asked.

“Oh just, got a couple of things… I don’t really want to talk about it.”

Lay frowned at this but let him go. It seemed suspicious but there was nothing he could do.

Kris worked his and Lay’s jobs until almost 4pm before returning to their dorm.

“It’s all over now.” Kris muttered when he stood in the elevator, slumped against the hand rail with his hand over his chest, rubbing at it in hopes that the pain would go away. “I just have to host tonight then I can rest.”

Kris entered the dorm and Lay smiled at him from the kitchen where he was just finishing cooking some food.

“You’re home late…” Lay said, suspicion still in his voice.

“Yeah well, I was talking to Kai.” Kris said. He hoped Lay didn't realise that Kai and Kris don't actually get along. Although he actually wasn’t being completely untruthful, for he had briefly mentioned his thanks to Kai after finishing work.

“Oh, right.” Lay answered with a voice that hinted of sadness. “Well I made food, want some?”

“Please.” Kris said tiredly. He sat on the sofa eating his meal and sitting with Lay. This was his favourite time of day. They sat down together, ate food, relaxed and watched TV.  Kris was so tired he didn’t remember finishing his food, or taking the plate to the sink, let alone falling asleep.

“Kris… wake up!” Kris was startled awake by Lay calling out to him and gently shaking him. Lay was biting his lip nervously and in that moment Kris felt that roles had been reversed. It was around a week ago when he was waking Lay from the same sofa, telling him to get up for work when he was clearly too weak to work. 

“Thanks.” Kris said. Heading to the shower and for a moment Lay looked like he was going to say something but he stopped himself, though was still frowning as Kris walked stiffly to shower. Just the small walk to the bathroom seemed to have Kris sweating and his heart beating fast, and for a little while he thought he was going to be sick. He stood swaying and holding onto the sink until his dizziness had passed before showering.

Once he was showered and dressed Kris coated his pale face in foundation, trying to ignore the dizziness that buzzed around his brain. But that dizziness seemed to affect his concentration and while he was applying makeup secretly as he had been for a little while he hadn’t noticed Lay enter. It was only when he finished and turned that he saw Lay frowning at him from his bed.

“Lay!” Kris said in his surprise. “Didn’t see you come in.” Lay came over and took Kris’s face in his, turning it gently from side to side.

“You shouldn’t have to wear makeup…” He said sadly, letting Kris go.  Kris didn’t reply and was about to walk away when Lay pulled something from his suit jacket. One of the tissues he had used to bulk out his figure had been poking out. Kris looked in horror at Lay as Lay realised what Kris was doing.

“This just isn’t right.” Lay said. Kris only nodded.

“It’s only for now, until we get our feet on track. I’ll sort it out.” Kris said dully. 

“But that’s the problem!” Lay said angrily. “You’re always having to sort something out! Why can’t you just live your life normally? You have to work ridiculous hours for low pay, you’re not getting any time off from work and sick leave is almost impossible to get your hands on! I don’t know how you convinced Soo Man to let me have time off, let alone p_” Lay stopped as he started to realise something. “Wait. What were the conditions for me being off sick?” He remembered that Kris had been getting up earlier and coming home later for the past week. “You haven’t been…”

Kris only stayed in silence, never having seen Lay show so much anger towards something.

“Kris… tell me you haven’t been doing my work. All of this time I was just sleeping and staying at ho_” Kris didn’t let Lay finish before pulling Lay into the tightest hug he could muster with his low strength.

“I had to Lay… How else would you have gotten your strength back?” 

Lay pulled himself out of Kris's embrace and looked Kris sternly in the eye. 

“But what about you, huh? Look at you you’re a walking zombie, padding your clothes with tissue so you don’t look like a skeleton, putting on makeup so you don’t look so drained. I saw how much effort it took you just to walk to the bathroom earlier!”

“I did it for you!” Kris said, his anger rising. “I did this because it was the only option that I saw! What would you have done? Just slept with that unicorn by your side hoping everything turned out all ing right?”

Kris had pushed it; he saw the hurt flicker across Lay’s face.

“You think I wouldn’t_”

“No I didn’t mean_”

“Wouldn’t do the same for you?”

“I didn’t mean it that way!” 

Lay’s eyes were turning teary and Kris suddenly noticed that it was 6pm. He was conflicted between staying home with Lay, or going and working for money which they desperately needed. He knew that Lay was in too much of a state right now so he made up his mind.

“I’ll be going to work now.” Kris said emotionlessly, stress and too many emotions swirling around inside of him that he couldn’t focus on one of those enough to put it into his voice. 

He turned quickly, hoping to escape the situation as soon as possible. That’s what Kris has done all of his life. When something got too much for him he would run. He ran from his mother, then from his father. And now he was fleeing the dorm.

In his haste he accidentally slammed the dorm when leaving. Well great, that’ll make things better.

Kai and some other young looking host we’re also in the hallway, leaving their dorm to host too. They looked over and Kris with a worried glance and Kris wondered how loud his and Lay’s voices had been to the other dorms.

He planned on ignoring Kai completely but they reached the elevator at the same time. The three of them stepped inside and stood awkwardly.

“Is Lay okay?” Kai asked eventually.

“He’s fine.” Kris said, suddenly realising how croaky his voice had gone. He was having to supress letting tears escape his eyes. Control yourself Kris!

“We heard shouting.” The other boy said. Kris just gave him a judging glance. The boy was definitely young, around Kai’s age. He was very tall and seemed to have a permanently straight face. And also didn't know when to mind his own business.

Kris looked away again and he heard Kai elbow the boy in the ribs and whisper harshly to the boy “Sehun don’t in!”

With unstable legs Kris walked to the host room and sat at an empty booth, taking in shaky breaths.  He couldn’t believe the way that he had just spoken to Lay. The hurt look on Lay’s face seemed to float in and out of his mind causing it to spin even more. Using a napkin from the table Kris started to dab the back of his neck and his forehead.

Guests filled the room and he vaguely remembered the girl who sat down in front of him.

“hey Kris do you remember me?” Kris focused on her face which seemed to change between her own and Lay’s.

“You came here several months ago!” Kris said, trying to distract himself by acting as a host even more than he normally would. “From America right?”

“Oh you remembered!” She squealed. “My name is Jessica, last time I came with my sister.”

“I remember her too.” Kris said. “Although in my opinion you’re much prettier.” He said, leaning across the table to whisper this to her. She giggled and moved around the circular table to sit slightly closer to him.

Her closeness added to the heat that Kris’s skin seemed to be giving off and he took his jacket off and wiped his forehead on the napkin again.

She frowned when she realised how skinny he was. All of the extra padding was in that suit and now that it was off his real figure was revealed. But right now he didn’t care. He looked back towards Jessica and saw her frowning, her face once again became Lay’s. She noticed that he didn’t have a drink either and was even more concerned for the Host's health.

“Don’t you eat or drink oppa? I’ll get something from the bar, what do you fancy?”

“Um…”He looked at Lay’s, no! Jessica’s face and tried to focus. “I’m fine.”

Lay spoke back to Kris. “You don’t seem fine, come on what do you want, I’ll get it. I’m sure you’d do the same for me right?” Who was he talking to? Lay?

He looked at the face in front of him that was becoming even more unfocused by the second and tried to stand. He took one step from the table before his legs gave out. He slurred out the words “I’m sorry Lay.” Before he hit a wall of blackness.

He tried to surface from the darkness that encompassed him. He heard voices. A woman frantically calling for help and for someone to call 119. He heard Lay’s broken voice, he heard his mother telling him to never come back. He sunk further into blackness and didn’t wake again for a long time.

Beep. Beep. Beep.

Kris found a noise disrupting his sleep.

Beep.

Wouldn’t someone shut that noise up?

Beep.

Kris opened his eyes to an unnatural whiteness that juxtaposed the blackness of his slumber. His eyes took a few minutes to adjust and he looked around at the room. A hospital? How had he gotten here?

He saw a drip pumping fluid into his system and a heart monitor sat at his side. So that’s the beeping.

Moments later a doctor came in.

“Ah I see you’re awake.”  He said, checking the equipment around Kris and the clipboard at the bottom of the bed. 

“Why am I here?” Kris asked gruffly.

“Well, after collapsing at SM Host Club you were brought here by ambulance. From the tests we have done so far it seems you could be suffering some kind of heart condition. I need to see to other patients but a nurse will be here in a few minutes to run some more tests. All we know at the moment is that it could be anything from as little as a bug to heart arrhythmia; until the tests are carried out we have no way of knowing.

“Arrhythmia? What’s that?” Kris asked.

“Arrhythmia’s typical symptoms are heart palpitations, dizziness and fainting, shortness of breath and tiring easily. It can be caused by many things, heart attacks, electric shocks, drinking too much alcohol or caffeine, and maybe even by stress.”

Kris just nodded, listening.

“A nurse will be through in a moment if you have any more questions.” The doctor said before leaving.

Kris waited for a few seconds before sitting up. He pulled the needles from his skin and disconnected himself from the machines. He scooped up his clothes from the corner of the room and then tore the front sheet of paper from the clipboard at the end of his bed. 

After making his way to the nearest restroom he changed from the hospital gown he found himself in back into his suit. Checking the time he realised that he must have been in the hospital for several hours as it was now nearing 10 o’clock at night.

Possessing no money to get home he started the long walk back to SM entertainment. The walk would take him several hours and he would have to walk around fifteen miles.  Kris estimated that it would take him five hours to get back to the host club. Since it was ten o’clock when he left the hospital he expected to get home only a bit later than when he would finish hosting anyway.

Tiring out after just an hour he stopped at a bench for a while. The more he walked the more he remembered. He remembered working from early in the morning, he remembered going home, and he remembered the argument. He also then remembered Lay’s face. Guilt flooded Kris’s system and he got up again, walking faster hoping to get home quicker, however just half an hour later he was out of breath again.

With the same start and stop routine it took Kris until half past three in the morning to get home. He hesitated for a moment outside the door before opening it quietly, hoping not to wake Lay.

To his surprise the lights in the lounge were still on and when the door made a gentle click as it shut Lay jumped up from the sofa. His eyes were red and blood shot and as he looked at Kris his eyes and body seemed to be drinking in his presence.

“You!” Lay yelled pointing a finger forward to Kris.

“I know.” Kris said sadly hanging his head. “I was an idiot I_” his words cut off as he was squeezed into Lay’s arms, which hugged tightly around Kris as if he would never touch him again.

“Don’t you know how worried I was?” Lay said angrily. “I hear rumours saying that you were taken to hospital! Then I get a phone call from the hospital saying that you’re missing! And that was five hours ago! I thought... I thought you were…” Lay couldn’t finish his sentence as tears started to pour down his face. Kris couldn’t help but to release his own tears as he nodded along with Lay.

“I know. I’m so sorry. Earlier I was harsh and I’m sorry.”

The two of them hugged for a while longer before going to bed, both of them snuggled in Kris’s bed, arms wrapped around each other as tightly as they had been earlier, and it was like that that the two of them went to sleep.

“Oh and by the way.” Lay said just before dozing off. Kris grunted in response. “It’s pay day tomorrow.” 

So here it is... The chapter I should have uploaded two or three days ago. Whoops. Sorry guys. It was a friends birthday the other day and I ended up going out for the entire weekend. But I'm home now and not only have I written this chapter but the next chapter is fully planned out. Actually the next chapter was supposed to be a part of this chapter but because it would have been much longer than the other chapters so I decided to split it. 

The next chapter will be a lot happier and light hearted than this chapter, I can assure you all. 

Thank you for those who have continued to post comments, those who have subscribed and to the new readers who have only just started to read my story. Without you this story is nothing. 

-1990stalker-