«MOMMY!» the word was a statement more than anything, a desperate cry for help. It didn’t help that it was followed by an ear-piercing scream either, to be compared to Jimin’s high note in ‘Let Me Know’. Needless to say, Jungkook’s ears really hurt even from the tall branch he was sleeping in.

“What is it?” another voice replied. The screamer, revealed to be – not surprisingly – Taehyung, ran out of the house and into Seokjin’s arms. The latter was sitting in a rocking chair on the porch, beside Namjoon who was resting in his beloved hammock.

Without replying Taehyung settled into his lap and pressed his face against the older’s chest. He didn’t say anything, but was seemingly very upset. Seokjin his hair, patting his head.

“Hey,” he said softly. “What’s the matter?” This was a common scene by now. After Taehyung’s phone-fail and the release of the goat, things had turned somewhat normal. Well, whatever was normal by their standards. Normal as in, Jimin returned to meditation while balancing on his head against the walls, Jungkook slept in trees because it was the only place he could be free from Jimin and Seokjin complained about coffee. The last one however, had started to make food again which was a relief for everyone (except Yoongi as Seokjin’s food now was preferred over his own vegan but then again no one really cared about Yoongi’s vegan food). Hoseok had begun his mission to convince people he wasn’t a poser and concept, and as of how he had learnt all of Fall Out Boy and One OK Rock’s lyrics so he was off to a good start. Well, what he thought was a good start. Namjoon thought he seemed rather like a maniac while muttering all those Japanese-English lyrics but no one listened to Namjoon anyways.

“Hoseok is mean again!” Taehyung sniffled into Seokjin’s shirt, very sad.

Seokjin just sighed, and looked at Namjoon. “Hey, go talk to Hoseok, this is the third time this week,” he said. Namjoon however, just let out a huff and turned away from the former.

“He won’t listen to me anyways,” he tried to argue to get out of the situation which easily could turn into something that required him to make effort of some kind.

Seokjin rolled his eyes at the comment. Hoseok wouldn’t listen because Namjoon didn’t even try. But he had learnt his tricks through the times, and knew how to bribe the rapper.

“I’ll make black bean noodles for dinner,” he offered, still Taehyung’s hair carefully in an attempt to calm him down. At this Namjoon’s head shot up, eyes widened in both surprise and anticipation.

“Seriously?” he asked suspiciously, and Seokjin nodded. And Namjoon was out of his hammock and in the door in a matter of seconds.

“See?” Seokjin muttered to Taehyung. “You just need to know how to bribe them,” Taehyung nodded slightly in acknowledgement, his hitched breath and heartbeat slowing down by the minute.

“Okay, listen,” Namjoon stood in the doorway, having finally managed to get Hoseok to take his headphones off.

“You’re not my master!” Hoseok glared.

“No, but I’m the one who’s got the responsibility of looking after you,”

“Oh my god is there anyone in this house who is not lame?”

Yoongi, who was passing by with a cabbage in one hand, stuck his head in. “Hey Hoseok, don’t listen to him. He’s old,” he advised, before carrying on with whatever he was doing. With the cabbage, Hoseok didn’t really want to know.

Namjoon furred his eyebrows and turned around to Yoongi. “Hey, you’re the oldest of us! I’m the youngest!”

Yoongi just laughed from down the hall. “You’re the oldest in your mind! If we do an x-ray shot on your brain it’ll have grey hair and sit in a wheelchair,”

Namjoon glared at him, staring at Yoongi’s back as it disappeared down the stairs. “I’ll have you know I’m just experienced with life! My brain is just fine!” he shouted without receiving any reply. Breathing a little more heavy than before he turned to Hoseok, who was looking curiously at him.

“That’s more effort than you’ve put into anything the last month,” he commented. Namjoon just looked at him with tired eyes, squinting at the grinning person on the bed. His brain felt exhausted and he was so ready for a nap. The black bean noodles could wait for another time.

“I tried,” he announced. “Just don’t be too rough with your dongsaengs, okay? We just got rid of that horrible goat and if Taehyung finds another animal I swear I will kill someone,”

Then he left for his hammock and told Seokjin he had had a serious talk with Hoseok about the importance of treating people right. Taehyung had left to go find Jimin, which left Seokjin, Namjoon, Yoongi and Hoseok in the house, with Jungkook wandering in with a dazed look half an hour later.

When Jungkook walked into the living room, the first thing he saw was Yoongi, draped in the couch, comfortably eating raw cabbage.

“That’s going to make you sick,” he commented and yawned. The place where Yoongi now was laying was his usual sleeping spot, and after having constantly been on the run to escape Jimin all day, he had looked forward to sleeping there, as the highlight of the day. He was so not going to let anyone take that place from him. That was his place just like Namjoon had his hammock. Usually he slept in trees as they were surprisingly comfortable and Jimin didn’t bother him there, but today he felt like sleeping on the couch. Slowly, a plan formed in his head.

Yoongi just shrugged from his lazy position, breaking off another bit of the cabbage before stuffing it into his mouth. “It’s natural medicine,” he announced. “People are cured from cancer by eating it or something. If I get sick from this I will sue mother Nature.”

Jungkook raised an eyebrow. “I doubt Taehyung would let you do that. He literally walked on national television to promote her. Embrace the Earth or whatever.”

Yoongi sighed and rolled his eyes before he sat up, looking at Jungkook with a stare saying something along the lines of ‘are you kidding with me right now?’, and Jungkook knew what was coming. One of Min Yoongi’s life-changing lectures. It had been a long time since he’d had one the last time.

“My dear Kookie.” Yoongi started. “If Taehyung tries to put a finger in front of me I will end him,” the words were simple, but they pretty much marked the end of discussion and Jungkook didn’t really dare to take it further. Even the rude maknae had his boundaries and they started with Y and ended with –oongi. Life-changing lecture indeed.

So instead he nodded and turned his gaze to the clock on the wall. “Shouldn’t you be out doing your daily yoga by now, though?” he asked innocently. If Yoongi went to his yoga, he could capture the couch. Any other logical person would just have told Jungkook to ask Yoongi to move, because then he most likely would. There was only one problem: it was Yoongi they were talking about. Yoongi didn’t move for anyone, and absolutely not for Jungkook. If they went by rankings in the Bangtan Household, Yoongi easily claimed the top spot over Namjoon, Hoseok and Seokjin, and Jungkook was – damn his youthful age – in the bottom half. He did pass Jimin the monk though, so he decided it wasn’t all cons.

Yoongi closed his eyes and slipped back into his original position. “I actually don’t feel like today,” he said lazily.

Jungkook started at him in awe. This was the person that did Tai Chi on the beach even with a reasonable falling-box risk looming at all times. As the calculated person he was however, he quickly changed his tactics.

“Is that… unhealthy ways of living?” he muttering, pretending to talk to himself. “And I, who thought that the almighty Yoongi-hyung was a perfect example of someone contributing to a healthy lifestyle… but all he does is slouch inside, loosing all the swag creds he’s achieved… Maybe Jimin is better…”

Needless to day, Yoongi was up and standing in half a second. “Me?!” he exclaimed. “Slouching?! I am the perfect example I tell you! You really want to turn to the monk? I WILL SHOW YOU GODDAMNIT MY SWAG CREDS ARE FAR FROM DROPPING.” And so, without another word, he stormed off.

No matter how young Jungkook was or how old Yoongi was, the maknae remained the sly fox on the team.

He sighed happily and laid down in the couch, instantly getting comfortable. From outside, he could faintly hear Namjoon and Seokjin discuss.

“I am really being that old?” Namjoon muttered helplessly.

Seokjin sighed and patted Namjoon on the back. “You’re not old, dearsy. Only your brain.”

This just led Namjoon to start wailing. “I’m going to die young!” he complained. “I’m going to get Alzheimer’s and die before I get to do a collab with A$AP Rocky and Kanye West!”

Seokjin obviously didn’t really know how to respond as his knowledge of Namjoon’s idols were limited, so he just resorted to mutter soothing words like random rappers or lyrics. It did seem to help, though. Jungkook decided he didn’t want to get involved in that.

But although he felt pleasant and cozy where he was, something felt off. There was something weird with the couch. He furred his eyebrows and turned to look underneath it. And in no time, he was hollering as loudly as Namjoon about Alzheimer.

“WHY IS OUR COUCH FILLED WITH CABBAGES?!”

A/N: I've hit writer's block. Big time. I'm really sorry and I know it's affecting you the most of everyone, but I really don't know where to go from here on. My chapters are usually written when I come up with one idea and I make the rest up as I write.I haven't really had any ideas so far, but I think I'm on the right track now. It's Easter Holiday right now so I have a little bit more free time, but I've had a lot of work and exams are coming up the next couple of months before I head to up the Norwegian version of high school. I have got some more ideas now however, so it'll be easier to write! I hope you're still willing to follow this story with me.