Chapter Six:

“Eric.” Hyesung whispered. “I think I have fallen in love.” He repeated when the horrifying silence had been going on. People had left from the street kitchen, and the amount of bottles had multiplied in front of Eric as soon as Hyesung had said the same sentence three times. “Eric. Say something.”

The leader cleared his raspy throat and lifted his idly eyes at the little prince. Hyesung seemed concerned and sure, he was that. He had fallen in love in a less than five days.  What were the odds that the one he supposedly loved was a man and Eric’s twin brother? Hyesung scowled worriedly. He hadn’t realised that Eric would be so shocked.

“Please,” Hyesung murmured. “Say something. I…I need you to…show that you aren’t weirded by me!” he raised his voice a bit.

Eric opened his mouth. He wanted to speak, but there weren’t enough words to describe how much he desired to grab Hyesung’s hand and shout at him right now.

“Eric,” Hyesung was almost crying. “Please.”

The older man didn’t utter a word, rose up from his seat, grabbed the jacket from the backrest and walked off towards the car that stood on the street. He got in, sat behind the steering wheel, before he slammed his head against it continuously. Without a warning, his tears ran down.

“Of course it isn’t okay.” He mumbled. “Of course not.”

                ***

Hyesung had never been so reluctant to go home. He would have wanted to drink couple more bottles and die to the overdose of alcohol. He had called Junjin as his head had been woozy. He had babbled something stupid to him, Minwoo, Dongwan and Andy and told that Eric didn’t accept him. Minwoo hadn’t said a word nor had Dongwan, but Andy had talked with him, telling that they are just shocked. He had been too.

Junjin hadn’t even answered.

So he had left a message.

Hyesung left the street kitchen and walked all the way back to his apartment building. His glance visited at the building next to his and a sigh escaped from his lips. He almost fell asleep in the lift when the doors flew open and his hovering figure advanced the door.

He heard terrible noise and yelling.

“YAH!” The voice said. “OPEN THE DOOR!”

Hyesung proceeded to the voice and went past the corner, when he saw the second youngest member having a battle with the door. Junjin was drunk, and his face still had the black bruise under the eye. He was seething with rage as the fists slammed against the door.

“YAH! OPEN THE DAMN DOOR!” Junjin screamed.

“Jin ah…” Hyesung prompted, shocking the younger guy. “What are you doing?”

Junjin inhaled deeply before he grabbed the upper arms into his hands and squeezed tightly, Hyesung be that it hurt. Junjin was breathing out through his teeth, the bitter smell of alcohol cramming through Hyesung’s nostrils. He looked at the man and gulped. Obviously, Junjin hadn’t liked what he had heard in the voice mail. His eyes were piercing at Hyesung’s, driving him in insanity.

“WHAT IS IT!?” Hyesung yelled back.

"I love you! We all do! Why are you so blind!? You have let me down! Why are you with him!?" Junjin shouted. “You have no idea how frustrated I am! We are trying to endure what you’re doing to us but we can’t! You are driving us all mad! I am devastated hyung! Why can’t you see the love?! Are you blind to see that there is a person who loves you more than anything!?”

“Jin ah, I…” The older man tried.

Junjin’s grip around the upper arm became sterner. “Have you not seen how he looks at you!? Have you not seen what you have done to me, to us!? Have you not realised that you are walking on a thin ice!?” He exclaimed. “I thought we understood each other. That we had a connection! But I don’t think I can live like this anymore. I can’t hyung. This ship has sailed. I won’t, can’t, love you anymore.” Junjin mumbled. “Let me say one thing; when you comprehend what’s going on, I am not here. Not anymore. Goodbye hyung. I hope he does make you happy.”

The grasp around the arms vanished, as Junjin glared at Hyesung once more, before he turned around and walked towards the lifts behind the corner. Hyesung watched the receding back and when it wasn’t in his sight anymore, he broke down to tears.

                ***

“He isn’t coming.” Andy said after he had received a message from Junjin. Eric looked at all of them and raised his eyebrow, as if asking Andy why. “He didn’t say. Just that he won’t come.” The maknae responded.

“Tsk…he must be having a terrible hangover and is now regretting what he said to me last night.” Hyesung commented wryly.

Eric glimpsed at him and gritted his teeth. He hadn’t said a word to him. Not even when Hyesung had greeted him, had he answered back. He knew that even if he said he was dead set against whatever the two were having, Hyesung wouldn’t have listened to him. Not now, not ever. Andy tapped his phone once more, and received an answer right away.

“I won’t come.” He read out loud.

“That’s the third time Junjin is skipping dance practice. If he keeps doing this, we cannot come back.” Minwoo stated. “I wanna see him.”

Hyesung snorted. “I have better stuff to do than go see him.” He spoke.

“What the hell is the matter with you!?” Eric raised his voice. “Don’t you understand how much you’ve changed after Jung Hyuk and you became an item!?”

Hyesung’s serious face disappeared and was now showing his utter mourn. Eric bit his cheeks before he stormed out of the room with Minwoo, Dongwan and Andy. The main vocalist perceived that everyone was against the relationship. But he always listened to his heart. So why wouldn’t he do it now?

                ***

Eric was using his fist to knock Junjin’s door. Minwoo was pressing the doorbell without pauses, Dongwan was ringing him for the third time while Andy tried to remember the door code. It was sure that Junjin was at home, but he didn’t open, nor answer. Eric slammed harder, almost biting his lip. Minwoo heaved a tired sigh when he couldn’t ring the doorbell anymore, and Dongwan put his phone down.

Andy was still trying and then, the device beeped and the click sound was audible.

“Jin, you’re here?” The maknae questioned, followed by the hyungs. “Jin ah!?”

“Go away!” Junjin shouted feebly. “I don’t want to see you guys. I don’t want you to see me. GO AWAY!”

Eric frowned as they entered the bedroom and saw the pump under the blankets. They advanced it and kneeled down.

“Jin ah,” Andy murmured. “If it’s about Hye—“

“Don’t mention that name.” Junjin snapped. “He is dead to me.”

Minwoo sat onto the bed and grabbed the hem of the blanket, pulling it slightly as he felt the resistance coming from the other dancer. Dongwan helped Minwoo and they managed to get the blanket off. Andy gasped and got onto his feet, Eric startled, and Minwoo and Dongwan were shaken, trying to comprehend what they saw.

“Jin…what happened?” They interrogated.

Junjin blinked his eyes idly, his pillow stained from blood he might have being coughing for a while now. He had even darker blue bruises on his face and his lip was cut.

“Guess…three…times.” He said weakly.

Andy gulped and looked at Eric, “Hyung…what are we going to do?” he said.

“I…I don’t…know.”

                ***

A MONTH LATER:

Jung Hyuk ogled at Eric, his hands together, the fingers laced through one another as he was practically begging on his knees. Eric looked down at him, preventing the urge to push him away and see how the miserable scowl on the face would disappear. But he didn’t do it, because unlike his twin, he was the more enduring one of them. Jung Hyuk lifted the united hands under his chin and let the corner of his lips hung low.

“Please.”

“No.”

“Please! I beg you!”

“It’s too soon, and I have been against this ever since you came back to Seoul!” Eric stated.

Jung Hyuk tsked. “I am truthfully asking you to pretend to be me while I am away!” he said. “You have done it for years now! Why is it suddenly so hard!?”

“I have to pretend in front of Hyesung!” Eric yelled back. “Don’t you understand that everything you say and do to me, makes me think that something is going to happen as soon as I blink my eyes!?” he questioned. “I don’t trust you and even more, I don’t want you to do it!”

Jung Hyuk rolled his eyes and got up from the floor. “If I had wanted to kill you at this particular moment, I would have done it already. But I need your help.” He spoke.

“Is this it?” Eric asked. “Is this how you retaliate!?”

Jung Hyuk snorted. “I like Hyesung.”

“No, you don’t.” The leader of Shinhwa shook his head. “You are revenging by hurting Junjin…Hyesung…lying to him and all of us!”

Jung Hyuk chuckled, angling his head. “You know…I have started liking Hyesung. I really do. I am not lying. I like to hold his hand, I like it how he sings to calm me down, and I like it how he is a totally different person to me as he is to you.” He commented. “Remember what you said in the car…month ago…”

Eric moved his jaw angrily.

“You said that if I even break a hair from Pil Kyo’s head, you will kill me.” The slightly older man muttered. “Is there any particular reason why you haven’t done it? Are you…should I say…scared of me?”

“Nonsense!” Eric exclaimed.

“No. It’s not fear.” Jung Hyuk walked around the twin. “I know what it is. You are in love with Hyesung.”

“Ludicrous!” The younger one shouted. “I am not in love with him!”

Jung Hyuk sighed unsatisfied and clasped his hands onto the man’s shoulders, piercing the other pairs of eyes with his expressionless and lighter ones. Eric jerked his body off Jung Hyuk’s grip and shook his head. They meddled with their eyes.

“I give you two days.” The older one mumbled. “If you don’t have an answer by then, the main vocalist will sing his last song.”

                ***

“Do it.”

“What!? NO!”

“But think about it Eric,” Dongwan put his arms over his thighs. “You can pretend to be Jung Hyuk and show bad things about him while you are with Hyesung.”

The leader frowned.

“You can say bad stuff about yourself and show how he sees his brother in reality. Hyesung might not see him as nice as he saw him before.” Dongwan suggested. “The most important thing is that you can show something is wrong with that man. Tell him how he used to beat you up.”

“But Wannie…” Eric began and heard a scorn from the younger guy. “I smoke…Jung Hyuk doesn’t smoke.”

Dongwan laughed. “So what? Are you planning on kissing him!?” he interrogated between the giggles. Eric felt his cheeks burning from embarrassment. But he collected himself as soon as Dongwan had become serious again and the tears of joy had vanished. “Seriously Eric, I say you should do it. Think about Junjin. He will be finally free for a while! How long does it gonna take for Jung Hyuk to find the most perfect gift for Hyesung!?” he asked.

Eric shrugged. “Maybe two days?”

“Yah, Eric!” Dongwan slapped his friend. “Are you kidding me!?”

The leader nodded.

“Then you need to hurry up!”

                ***

Eric plodded next to Hyesung on the crowded street. He had let Hyesung take his hand and then, for some unclear reason, entwine their fingers. Not that it bothered Eric. He tried to ignore his heart, which thud rapidly against his chest, and his brain that kept shouting inappropriate words inside his head.  Hyesung kept talking, sometimes holding a pause when he saw something eye catching from the shop windows. In that moment, Eric perceived that he had no idea what Hyesung was talking about.

“You want to have something to eat?” The younger male questioned with a smile. “I visited this street kitchen with Eric a month ago. I thought it was okay.”

Eric harrumphed and answered, “I do not like street kitchens.”

“Oh,” Hyesung pouted.

“But we can eat something else; with extra amount of sesame seeds and oil.” Eric proposed. “If you fancy that?”

Hyesung blinked his eyes a bit, watching the guy in front of him like a guest. Eric’s heart commenced beating faster and faster when Hyesung narrowed his eyes and pursed his lips more. Then he withdrew and laced the fingers again.

“What was that?” Eric interrogated carefully. “What was with your bizarre staring competition?”

Hyesung chuckled. “No, I just…I didn’t know you knew about my love towards sesame seeds and oil.” He told. “But Eric and the others might have told about it to you.”

“Yes!” Eric exclaimed. “Yes, my…brother brought it up once.”

Hyesung flashed another, ridiculously beautiful, smile as they continued walking on the street. Eric knew his cheeks were red, since they were burning like hell. But it was soon broken by Hyesung’s silent grumbles. He was biting his lip when Eric turned towards him and saw him going through something painful.

“Hyesung ah, is it your knee!?” Eric raised his voice.

The little prince furrowed his eyebrows and scrunched them down. “Jung Hyuk ah…how…how did you know? How did you know my knee is in pain!?” he questioned.

Eric gulped the lump of panic down and cleared his throat. “I…I…umm…Eric…told me.” He responded.

“Ah, of course.” Hyesung slapped his forehead and laughed. “I always forget…Eric.”

The leader of Shinhwa, who pretended to be his twin brother, grinned and put his arm over Hyesung’s shoulder, prompting, “Don’t we all?”

                ***

Eric brought Hyesung home after the tiring day. They stood in front of the main vocalist’s apartment and barely talked. Eric had no idea whether Jung Hyuk was a smooth talker or if he changed entirely in front of Hyesung. For the first time Eric was up-tight with him. He had hugged him million times, even kissed him. They had been known as the awkward, oil and water, couple since Shinhwa debuted and they still were the push and pull of the group.

“I had super awesome time with you today.” Hyesung praised, using some sort of sorcery to Eric since he was dozing off. “And I don’t…I don’t think you are arrogant…or that Eric is a fool.”

The older man scowled.

“He may be a fool, but he is our leader. And he does his job well.” Hyesung smiled. “But I know you love him. As much as I love you.” He leaned in a bit.

Eric suddenly sensed his arms tensing, feet gluing on to the floor and his body freezing. Hyesung looked at him once more, before he closed his eyes and put his arms around his neck, anticipating “Jung Hyuk’s” next move. The taller man closed his eyes in the hope that the kiss would end instantly and he wouldn’t have to explain why he was so nervous. But no…the kiss didn’t end. It went on and on and on and on, and until Eric could notice, he had been answering the kiss for a while now. His arms had even began to move and his hands were desperately trying to get onto the back.

Eric felt dizzy.

He was woozy.

And his heart was bursting.

And the brain kept chanting idiotic things over and over again.

Hyesung’s palms got onto Eric’s jaw and the kiss deepened. But before it became any more ravenous, Hyesung took his tongue back and pecked the thick lips. Eric stared at him; the eyes, the nose, the cheeks and the lips. His heartbeat hurt his chest. The way Hyesung looked at him was a suicide. Eric’s fingers were shivering when he brought the right hand onto the chubby cheek.

“Jung Hyuk ah,” The younger guy murmured. “Good night.”

The one last peck surprised Eric and he became a statue. And when Hyesung had entered his apartment, the supposedly Jung Hyuk stood there for a while, thinking about the thing he had just done. He swallowed the accumulated saliva. Now he realised why he had always been a fool. Because he was one. And he would always be. He looked at the door that had been shut minutes ago, before he touched his lips.

Of course…

The retaliation.

Because Eric did love Hyesung after all.