I wish I could...

I was standing in the street outside the SM Building in the middle of the night. It was too cold but for me it was useless. It's been a week since I came inside of the conference room and told Youngmin about the reality. Still  I think the words and the phrases I said didn't sinked inside his brain but instead it rot right away. In the few weeks I wasn't complaining about SM Entertainment because of what they did. They're too quiet and calm. Maybe it's because they didn't want to mess up with artists. But I know, Sooner as this some kind of "hate" passed away, I'm sure that they will start spreading another rumors whenever they think that an artist is wrong. Their motto be like, You're wrong? Prepare to die. I was against of them. If only I knew EXO from the very beginning, I won't be joining and forced them not to join as well. I really got this dream long ago. To join this certain kind of company because Groups are really fun and working together not as a perfect group and they really don't care what others think. But as I've worked here, I gradually realized I was wrong. They're pretending to be 'fun' whenever they have problems. They're working hard together because they want to prove the company that they're wrong. The thing I'm glad is, it is Artist vs Company. Not Artist vs Artist. 

Us, EXO, want to prove them wrong as well. 

I've seated in exhaustion after the water break. I don't know but I sense something different than other time around. "Can we please extend the break?" Kyungsoo exlaimed. He's not tired. Or I think he just don't like to show his tiredness.

"No. I'm the choreographer here and I'm working hard to teach you guys for your new album. You should've worked hard as well. I don't want you to expose in this kind of industry. Holy cow, you all are pathetic. I don't want to teach you, but I have no choice because the salary is high." Mr. Son Yeongsuk. Our new choreographer. Our past choreographer weren't that strict. And besides, he give a break whenever he knew that we are already tired based on our performance. 
He got kicked after the issue.

"We're already working hard. Why in the middle of the night we're still training. It's not on the contract. It says we will have a 5hour sleep and now its already 2:30am." Jongdae mumbled. Tao's waist is hurting. "First of all, you're an idol. Second you have a responsibility for your fans. Third. YOU WERE GETTING PAID HIGH."

"Excuse me." Kyungsoo calmly called him without respect. "I was about to ask. You want to become an Idol right? Then learn to know how to calculate basic math first. I think you haven't got into high school."

"What are you saying?!"

"Look, We have $700k salary every month. Divide it by 12. See how much each of us got. AND we will pay another one for SM Entertainment. It's like salary, Divide by 12, Minus 30% for SM Expenses, Minus 5% for tax. 30 or 40k a month? We're working hard to get this kind of ?" Jongin stepped and held Kyungsoo's hands. 

"THEN YOU SHOULD KNOW WHAT PATH YOU'VE TAKEN."

"Path?! If only I knew this, I didn't join hell." Baekhyun exclaimed. They left the dance studio and left us alone. Us two. Sehun quietly walked outside as well. "What? You're not joining them?"

"Mr. Son Yeongsuk. I know SM Entertainment paid you so that someone will leave."

I left him speechless. I was about to explode after I got into my dorm to see our email. It's our salary.

"$500K USD?!" 

"I knew it. I knew SM would lower our salary. They want me to leave this group immediately."

Tao began to cry silently. I was started to get guilty and pity. I stood up.

"I will leave this group."

"No." Sehun whispered.

"Sorry. But because of me, everything is ed up. Because of me, they're bringing you all down, spreading some funny rumors that fans will believe. I know this is all sudden. But I've already decided."

"NO ONE WILL LEAVE THIS GROUP. NO ONE. WE WILL. WE WILL."

"We will what?" Baekhyun started to cry as well. His eyes became swollen and became red. This is what they have been through because of me. "Will what? We can do this? We are handled by this company and there's nothing we can do. The only thing was the lawsuit."

"I said no one will leave." Joonmyeon exclaimed.

"What? Getting selfish once again?" Yifan added. The atmosphere became darker. "We all wanted to leave. We all wanted to rest!"

"I know. But do you ask me if I'm tired as well? No. You even don't care about me. If we filed lawsuit against SM, do you know what fans feel?" 

"I don't know what to do with you guys. I thought you all we're strong, WHAT'S HAPPENING? SLOWLY BREAKING? Guys please. Lawsuit is not only the way." Chanyeol added.

"I will please him to stop ruining our group. I will beg him tomorrow."

"You don't have to do that Chanyeol, It's not your fault."

"Even if it's not. I want everyone of us to stay no matter what. We're family right? Please don't let such thing as this bury you in destruction. Think about the positive ones.

No one will ever leave the group."

"I'm the one who will beg him." I patted Chanyeol's shoulders. "I will try to endure this pain."