What the .

That was all that was going on in Luhan's head. He couldn't focus on the way Sehun's lips gently moved against his or the way the Prince was clinging at him, arms exploring every surface possible. Sehun was kissing him. Not Ji-eun, but Luhan.

Does this mean the Prince is cheating on Ji-eun with me? Technically, Ji-eun doesn't even know they're dating. But that doesn't mean he can start going around kissing random people he just met. People like me.

Luhan began struggling to break free, arms hitting Sehun's chest and muffled sounds of protest escaping his lips. He ignored the physical pain of separating from the Prince, he shoved away the lit desire burning deep in his gut at how good, how right it felt being with Sehun like this. Finally, the Prince pulled away, slight pants breaking their silence.

Luhan was shaking when he shoved Sehun off, hand wiping at his mouth. His tone was harsh, almost hurt, "What is your ing problem?"

Sehun ran a hand through his hair, eyes glazed. Luhan tried not to stare at Sehun's swollen lips moving as the Prince said, almost to himself, "It doesn't make sense. But it somehow does. Your eyes, your voice, the way you make me feel. I know you. I think I might even lo-"

"You're drunk," Luhan cut him off before he said anything he would regret. He couldn't deny the spark of happiness that Sehun actually recognized him for who he was, but the amount of guilt and anger (at himself more than at Sehun's drunk, rash actions) easily overcame that. Fighting back the urge to kiss Sehun again, Luhan continued, "What you're saying is insane. You're dating my sister, aren't you? And it makes sense that I would resemble her since we're twins. Especially since she's treating you coldly at the moment, so you wanted a substitute," Luhan laughed bitterly, "And what better replacement than someone who looks exactly like her?"

"Lu-"

"I hope this won't happen again. It's just the alcohol talking, so don't worry, I'll pretend I forgot all about this tomorrow morning and blame it on the hangover."

He watched Sehun clench his jaw, pain flashing through his eyes. Luhan was left staring warily up at Sehun as the younger bent down to Luhan's level and looked him straight in the eyes. "Fine. Okay, so maybe I was using you as a replacement. But that didn't mean I wasn't sincere about everything I did. Alcohol isn't the main factor here. I do like you - though I'm not sure in what way - but after hearing everything you said, I think I woke up."

Luhan, trembling noticeably at this point, turned away once Sehun made to stand. The Prince wasn't done, however.

"Oh, and just to make things clear, I'm not - I'm not gay."

He couldn’t watch Sehun walk away, so he sat there facing the convenience store’s painfully bright neon sign as he tried as hard as he could to shove down the reaction to Sehun’s words because really, what was he expecting? The Prince had made it clear from the start he was straight and there was no possibility for them to happen. But even so, it didn’t call for Sehun to phrase it like that, like he was aiming for the maximum amount of inflicted pain, like he was making sure Luhan knew he was just an experiment created by one too many empty soju bottles and a handful of bad decisions.

This was all his own fault, in the end. He was the one who chose to meet up with the Prince here, foolishly believing that they could even begin to be friends, even after the mess of unresolved feelings and fake personas. He should have just kept walking.

Sighing, Luhan let himself fall onto the gravel. His hand unconsciously lifted to graze his lips, recalling the way Sehun kissed him so sweetly, so sure that Luhan was the one, at least in that moment. Shaking his head, he dragged himself up and out of the dangerous hope that Sehun could even begin to love him as he was now and readied himself for the long trek back home.

¤¤¤

Bouncing lightly on his feet, Chanyeol took the familiar route leading to the bar he frequented so often. He found it funny how little he drank there, with its main business being alcohol. After his last talk with Baekhyun, he barely had any time to meet up with his boyfriend. Sehun's decision as to who he would marry was startling close, and with that, Chanyeol's own wedding was also creeping closer by the day. He was swarmed with wedding preparations and meetings to finalize the treaty between America and Korea, barely leaving any room to think about anything else, such as his worrying relationship.

But at last, he managed to clear his schedule and break free. And his first stop was, of course, to Baekhyun's side.

He got the feeling that Baekhyun wouldn't be avoiding him anymore so he could resume visiting at night with limited disguise. Chanyeol suspected Baekhyun was upset because he was being a terrible boyfriend by popping by spontaneously and never actually going on a proper date. Now that Baekhyun knew about his identity and the reason why he had to sneak around, everything would be absolutely fine.

Oh, how wrong he was.

Chanyeol was right about the first part, however, as he found Baekhyun washing dishes in the back. He smiled to himself, "He must have been waiting for me."

"You have no idea what's coming," sighed Jongdae, shaking his head disapprovingly as he watched from the counter. Chanyeol simply shot him a clueless smile in return.

When Chanyeol wrapped his hands around Baekhyun's waist in a back hug, the shorter simply dropped his dish towel with a sigh and gently pulled away from the Crown Prince's embrace.

"Follow me," said Baekhyun. The shorter swiftly went out the back door without looking back.

By the time Chanyeol joined him, Baekhyun had his back facing the Crown Prince. His whole body was tense, the way he shrunk into himself like he was preparing for a sudden infliction.

Clearing his throat, Chanyeol cheekily asked, "So are we going to have back alley way make-out sessions now?"

"You really can't read the mood, can you?"

Frowning, Chanyeol replied without missing a beat, "I know you're upset. I wanted to cheer you up."

"I wish you would have just asked what was wrong." Baekhyun turned to him, his eyes so dark Chanyeol couldn't see the usual shine. "And now it's my turn to talk. So don’t interrupt."

"Okay…” Chanyeol was starting to get a sense that things were worse off than he thought they were originally.

"I’m just gonna get this out there first off. I’m uncomfortable dating royalty, let along the Crown Prince. You're our future King for god's sake! And don't think I don't know about your engagement. I mean, it's not even the matter of your title anymore at this point. I don't want to be reduced to a mere affair. I want to be treated as someone's priority."

“I don’t understand.” So this is all because of my… title? Something I can’t even control? Panic creeped up from Chanyeol’s stomach. “You can’t - it’s not. This isn’t happening.”

"Chan-"

"I'll do anything, I'll run away with you-"

"Chanyeol, stop! You and I both know that's not fair to anyone. Sehun will have to take over the throne because of you and I can't expect you to throw everything away at the drop of a hat. You can't give up all of this just for someone like me." Baekhyun ran his hand through his hair, still not completely facing Chanyeol. “I thought it through a billion times already, okay? Can you honestly say there’s going to be a future for us? A bartender and the King? Are you kidding me?”

“We can’t just end it because of this,” Chanyeol protested desperately, “We’ll think of a way.”

“Do you really plan on giving up everything you’ve ever known to live like me, working part-time jobs and hiding your identity?”

Baekhyun finally brought his eyes up to meet Chanyeol’s, and he saw the hesitation and fear and knew that it wasn’t fair of him to ask this of the Crown Prince. He already knew the answer, which was why he chose to break it off now, but he still needed to hear it straight out of Chanyeol’s mouth. He prayed Chanyeol didn’t catch onto the stupid hope in his question.

“I… I’m sorry.”

“I didn’t expect you to,” Baekhyun replied, and Chanyeol immediately felt the wave of guilt hit him. He knew Baekhyun was comforting him. “You’ll do fine without me. We both know that. You’ll continue living with riches surrounding you, like you’ve always had, and you don’t deserve any less.”

Baekhyun stepped closer to him and tip-toed so he could press a soft kiss on Chanyeol’s cheek. Giving him a small smile, he said, “It’d be nice for both of us if we didn’t see each other again.”

in a shaky breath, Chanyeol barely managed out a nod before Baekhyun was gone.

¤¤¤

Sehun had a habit of sneaking out. Jongin supposed all royalty did, but it was still nerve-wracking to wait for the Prince to come back. Being his butler, he was also supposed to make sure Sehun had come to no physical harm without making the Prince miserable. It was a fine line between safety and Sehun’s happiness.

All Jongin could do was wait outside Sehun’s room for the Prince to make it back. Tonight, however, he had a feeling something had gone terribly wrong.

With the clock ticking closer to two in the morning and Jongin still not having a wink of sleep, he heard the Prince’s stumbling steps and thumping sounds of his body knocking against the wall. Sehun made his grand appearance swaying from side to side with disheveled clothes and a bird’s nest for hair. He looked safe enough - though happy was questionable. Jongin rushed forward to catch Sehun before he toppled to the ground, reeling back at the strong alcohol scent and damp clothes.

“Are you drunk?” Jongin exclaimed, trying to push open Sehun’s door with one hand and steady the Prince with the other. “I thought you never drank. What are you doing to yourself?”

Sehun slumped his head onto Jongin’s shoulder, transferring all his weight to the butler. He mumbled, “You don’t have to do this. Put up with me, I mean.”

"It's my job, Your Highness."

Sehun hiccupped out a laugh at that. "Then is being so good to me all the time part of your job, too?"

"Yes, Your Highness."

Grunting, Jongin managed to drag Sehun across the floorboards and onto his bed, debating whether or not to change the Prince’s clothes. In the end, he threw a blanket over the Prince’s face, irritated at being forced to stay up this late just so Sehun could down a couple glasses.

The butler deemed his work finished and turned to leave, but Sehun’s hand shot out and grabbed onto his wrist to stop him. Confused and slightly alarmed, Jongin bent down to Sehun’s level and waited until the Prince blearily opened his eyes.

“I hate being drunk, Jongin. It .”

“I know, Your Highness.”

“I still made a complete fool out of myself, but hey, it helped me conquer my fears! Not all of them, though. And I realized a new fear of mine.” Sehun paused, waiting for Jongin to say something. The butler stayed. He hadn’t been dismissed yet. “You know, that's what I like about you, Jongin. You're always on my side. Silently. I like you, Jongin. I like you a lot. Do you like me?"

"Of course, Your Highness.” Jongin dipped his head, wondering where the Prince was going with this.

"Do you like me better or Ji-eun better?"

"I like Your Highness better.”

"Okay." A few seconds later, the Prince swung out a uncoordinated and tugged on Jongin’s hem. "Then do you like me better or Luhan better?"

"I... I like both of you in different ways."

Sehun's voice grew soft, "What is Luhan to you?"

"Luhan... To me, he's someone I want to talk to all the time and I'll never get bored. I like making him laugh and being his confidant. And I really, really want him to get his happy ending."

"Happy ending, huh?" Sehun laughed, letting his hand drop down. "Is he your happy ending?"

“I already know my place in his story, and it’s not the one you think or want to be.”

"I'm not gay, Jongin,” Sehun said almost automatically.

"I never said you were,” Jongin replied back just as fast.

The Prince didn’t say anything for a long time, making Jongin fidget. Before Jongin could ask to excuse himself, Sehun spoke up again, “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course, Your Highness,” He softly answered.

“Do you like Ji-eun better or Luhan better?”

Jongin blinked at the random question. “I guess I like both of them in different ways. They’re both two very different people so it’s hard to compare.”

“They’re supposed to be very different, huh?”

Jongin had thought Sehun dozed off again but the Prince suddenly started sniffing and suspiciously covering his eyes, which further alarmed the butler. “Your Highness, are you - are you crying?”

“No, I’m not.” Sehun covered his eyes with his arm. “I’m really not.”

He stared, exasperated and tired, at Sehun, still a little worried at what was going on with the Prince. Sitting down by Sehun’s bedside, he began to pat the younger’s head comfortingly.

Soon enough, the Prince began to speak, “I, I think I’m going to have to do something very difficult. It’s going to hurt and I’m not ready and it’s so unfair that this is happening to me.”

Jongin had an inkling of what Sehun was talking about, but he didn’t say anything and continued patting.

“I’m going to have to confront her and I’m scared of what she’s going to say. I’m scared she’s going to confirm that everything is true and I don’t know what to do then if it really is, if she really does turn out to be, be a…” Sehun couldn’t finish, but Jongin knew what he was trying to say.

“Will it change how you view them?”

“No,” Sehun firmly answered, then hesitated, “Well, I don’t think so. If she has a legit reason, then no. But I can’t help but think about all the backlash and all that crap we’ll have to go through.”

Jongin stilled.

“I guess I’m just worried about how it’ll affect her - him? I don’t even know anymore.”

“I think this is something you should talk to that person about,” Jongin suggested gently.

Sehun groaned, “I know, but it’s really hard to talk to them now.”

“Hey, you’ll figure out a way. You’re Prince Sehun. It’s not that hard to get someone to talk to you. Just don’t think too hard about it.”

Sehun merely sighed in response.

Jongin tried again, “Do things the way you usually do! All bravado and no planning. It’s better than you moping around like this.”

“Yeah,” Sehun muttered out. “Yeah, thanks, Jongin.”

Sehun flipped over on his other side, which Jongin took as a sign that he wanted to be left alone. Giving him one final pat on the back, Jongin returned to his post outside Sehun’s room. The Prince wasn’t the only one who needed to do some reflecting.

¤¤¤

One good thing about being out and about at three in the morning was that there was barely anyone to bump into a visibly upset and tired Luhan who couldn’t handle anymore human interaction. He had somehow dragged himself onto an empty bus going god knows where and dumped his body onto the very back seats that created a makeshift bed. Unfortunately, his peace was soon disturbed by a phone call.

“Hello?” Luhan drowsily answered without looking at the caller ID.

“Hey, Lu, it’s me.” It took him a while to figure out who ‘me’ referred to, and after a moment he matched the voice to a face. Ji-eun. She sounded like she just woke up and was holding back a yawn. “Sorry, I probably woke you up.”

“No, it’s fine. What’s going on?”

“I just woke up myself because someone was knocking on my door and when I looked out, I just saw this note on the ground,” Ji-eun groaned, and he heard the sound of paper crinkling. “You’re going to hate me for this, I swear, and I’m so sorry, but I honestly have no idea what’s going on between you and Sehun and I think you need to come back to the Castle.”

“Oh, no. That is not happening.” Luhan shot up from his seat, now wide awake. The bus driver gave him a wary look, but Luhan was too busy freaking out to notice. He just barely got out from the chaos of living in the Castle and after what happened with Sehun, he really, really didn’t want to go back and face the Prince. He knew he was whining, but he couldn’t help it. “You promised, Ji-eun.”

“I know and I’m so, so, so sorry but you have to listen.” Ji-eun cleared and he knew she was reading the note to him, “‘Meet me at our spot at four. I need to talk to you. There’s some things on my mind. XO, Sehun.’ What does that even mean? What’s ‘our spot’? Luhan, I’m losing my mind here.”

“So what you’re saying is you want me to pretend to be you again?”

“Just this one time,” Ji-eun meekly said.

“But you said that last time, too. How am I supposed to know for sure that Sehun won’t seek you out again like this and you’ll end up calling me back? I can’t keep covering for you. I have my own life to live now, okay?”

“Hey, but this time you’re just cleaning up after your own mess. And we’re almost there, Luhan, we’re almost done play-acting this whole, stupid show. If I could, I would have already gone myself. I have my assumptions on what happened but since you never bother explaining I don’t know for sure and I can’t actually do anything since I’m scared I’ll screw things up,” Ji-eun sighed, and softened her voice, “I don’t want to fight with you right now.”

“Yeah, it’s really late and we’re both tired.” Luhan rubbed his eyes. Sniffing at his clothes, he recoiled at the alcohol stench. This was definitely not the prime condition to go undercover. “So what’s your suggestion?”

“You end things with him. Just slipping away without anyone noticing isn’t going to solve anything. You have to make sure he won’t ever want to chase after me again. I tried, but I don’t know him that well and he just thinks I’m shy or something, I don’t even know. Easy enough, right?”

Being a jackass to Sehun and intentionally hurting him? That didn’t sound easy at all, but as Luhan recalled Sehun’s earlier words, And just to make things clear, I’m not - not gay, he supposed that was the answer to the question of Sehun and Luhan’s ending together.

Sighing, Luhan threw his hands up and agreed, “We made it this far, might as well see it to the end.”

¤¤¤

Everything between riding the bus to the Castle and waiting nervously at the pool (Luhan’s best guess of where “their spot” would be) passed in a blur. Ji-eun was standing outside the castle for him ready with a dress, the wig, and her make-up. She had brought the perfume he asked for, which she sprayed quite generously to cover the smell of alcohol. The disguise was donned in a flash, both of them already accustomed to the procedure. Before he knew it, Ji-eun had vanished, leaving him standing alone on the path leading to the garden. A few minutes later, he was now crouching by the water’s edge.

The glowing flowers were still here, as were the fairy lights, but the overall effect of the pool was significantly less magical than Luhan remembered. Maybe it was because he was dead tired and upset, or maybe his daydreams from the last time the two had been here had long been shattered.

Back then, I was caught in the details. My always-present wig, my make-up, Sehun’s smile, the higher pitch of my voice, Sehun’s messy hair, Sehun’s smirk. All of that distracted me from the bigger picture.

“I didn’t think you’d come.”

Luhan jolted forward, only barely regaining his balance. He glanced at Sehun’s reflection towering over him in the water, his chest hurting at the prospect of what he had to do.

“I have some things I need to say to you, too,” Luhan replied, surprised at how calm he sounded.

Sehun didn’t speak, but Luhan felt the Prince kneel next to him and edge closer. The second Luhan turned to look at him, Sehun cupped his face and leaned in so their lips would meet. Neither of them moved at first, only Sehun innocently pressing his lips against Luhan’s. It wasn’t any worse than their past kisses, but this time, it burned Luhan’s lips. Immediately he pulled away, eyes staring incredulously up at Sehun, who had on an unreadable expression.

“Even your lips taste the same,” Sehun whispered. The blood in Luhan’s veins froze.

“What?”

Sehun blinked, before sliding on a smooth smirk. “You’ve been avoiding me recently, so I decided to greet you with a much-awaited kiss. I missed you.”

“Uh-huh,” Luhan replied, purposely vague. He wanted to say, I missed you, too, seeing you look at me like that, like you love me. But of course, he didn’t.

“I know you have your reasons, but it’d really help if you can explain them.” When Luhan didn’t respond, Sehun continued, “I - I think I made a mistake while you were kind of away, since we didn’t have any interactions and I needed someone to - to, I don’t know, make me feel less ty? And I just - I need you to reassure me that you’re the one I want to marry.”

“I’m not.” Luhan barely suppressed a wince at the way Sehun tensed.

“I heard that wrong, right?”

“No, I - I’m sorry.” Luhan braced himself, shutting his eyes as he forced his mind to overrule his heart for once. “I can’t marry you. There’s someone back home; he’s my neighbour and I practically grew up with him. He’s best friends with my brother. I - I’m actually engaged, and we’re just waiting for until we have enough money to get married.”

Sehun didn’t say anything for a long time. All Luhan could hear was the ragged sound of his breathing.

“Sehun, I-”

That seemed to snap the Prince out of his stupor. His eyes flashed, lips curling out of hurt and anger and it was the exact image of when Luhan had shoved him away back in the parking lot of 7-Eleven which was why the older boy knew he had said exactly the right - and wrong, technically - things.

“So you’re saying you were leading me on? From the beginning until now, you just wanted to wait until you lasted in the top five or whatever so you got your money? And after you got what you wanted, that’s why you did an one-hundred-eighty on me and flipped?”

Luhan wordlessly swallowed and nodded.

The silence stretched on around them. Luhan braced himself for the explosion, but to his surprise, all Sehun did was heave a sigh. Little did he know, Sehun was about to unravel all of his plans in just one second.

“I would expect that from Ji-eun. But I really can’t believe you would do that.”

It took a moment for Luhan to register what just happened. He blinked frantically, voice hitching a pitch higher than the usual, “What are you saying? I’m-”

“No, you’re not. I’m not exactly sure who you are, but I have an idea.” He could hear the tragic, little smile in Sehun’s voice. “Your perfume isn’t heavy enough to cover up the soju, you know.”

. Luhan got to his feet in a daze, hands covering his face as a defense mechanism. The only thing stopping him from bolting was the lost-puppy-look Sehun was sporting, eyes all big and confused.

Luhan tried, “I - I think you’re mistaken.”

“Really?” Sehun said the word more as a sentence than a question. “I would love it if I was mistaken. Tell me you’re really Ji-eun, then. Tell me you’re not Luhan.”

“Why, because you want to make it clear you’re not gay?” Luhan wanted to clamp his hands over his mouth. Sehun had thrown him off guard. He belatedly realized he just gave away the answer when Sehun let out a bitter laugh.

“I admit that it’d be easier if you were born a girl-”

“I can’t believe you just said that.” Luhan took a step back as if he was hit, wanting to put as much as space as possible between him and the Prince. A tiny voice inside of him was yelling at him to stick to the plan, to stop messing everything up. Struggling to find the right words to say versus the hurtful insults he wanted to throw like bricks and stones as hard as he could but all he felt himself do was shake his head repeatedly, as he watched Sehun stand up, a mix of apologies and anger and confusion flying over his features.

In the middle of all this, Luhan thought darkly, calmly, This shouldn’t matter to me anymore. It’ll be that much more easier to cut Sehun out now.

He felt his hands reaching up to take off his wig, felt his lips moving as he finally said, “My name is Luhan,” felt the rush of relief despite watching Sehun shut his eyes briefly and a flash of pain cross his face, like he simultaneously needed and loathed to hear Luhan say with his own lips the truth.

Luhan had come here thinking it was going to be the last encounter he’d have with Sehun and finally finish things, but he knew he had just set off another horrible rope tying him back to the Prince, another responsibility, another missing solution he needed to find.

The Prince levelled his piercing gaze at him. It was all kinds of accusing and hurt as he said, “All the clues, that thing in the pool when Jongin fished you out was that wig you’re holding, right? Why Jongin and Luna and Kyungsoo were always so protective and your baggy clothes and why you were so guarded in the beginning… I didn’t realize it at first but it all clicked once you switched places with Ji-eun and I met Luhan. I still don’t want to believe it’s true, to think that someone I had showed my most vulnerable sides to would lie to me about something so large, as if you didn’t trust me.”

“It wasn’t about trust. It didn’t matter what I felt about you, it was just a favour I needed to do for Ji-eun,” Luhan haltingly said.

“So it really was about money in the end, huh?” Now Luhan could see was Sehun’s exploding point. “Is it always about ing money with me? Was that all you ever saw? A ing price tag on me?”

Luhan could have explained how he didn’t know they would receive any financial gift in being the top five, and that of course he saw more than the crown when he looked at Sehun, the most magnificent being he had ever seen before, but it was much more easier to simply nod silently, to agree to what felt like his impending death.

“You’re lying,” Sehun stared hard at Luhan, eyes searching for something, anything that would betray the truth. “Like you’ve always did, up until now.”

Luhan held his hands up in a mocking you-got-me attitude, wig dangling from one hand and eyebrows raised. “It’s over, now. Go ahead and turn me in.”

Instead, Sehun tore off his sweater and threw it on the ground in a fit of frustration, yelling at no one in particular. Luhan barely stopped himself from flinching. Already, he could feel the regret sinking in at all the lines he had crossed and all the harsh words he wished he had held in. The Prince faced the pool, silent and fuming, and Luhan took that as his cue to leave, not wanting the Prince to see how much this whole exchange affected him. But Sehun had one last thing to ask.

“Did you ever… Even the tiniest bit, have feelings for me?”

It was killing him. The question was killing Luhan, physically hurting him to the core. He could hear the tentative hope in Sehun’s voice, the probable forgiveness, the tiniest promise that if Luhan chose the right answer, he would be choosing their happy ending at the same time.

But they were not in a fairy tale, or at least one half of this pairing was not. Luhan had to wake up from this illusion. He was a farmer’s boy. He would not be able to find his happy ending here.

And because Luhan was a terrible actor, because he feared he would impulsively tell the truth like he wanted to all this time, he wordlessly walked away instead of answering. Maybe his departure was an answer in itself.