The shuffling of paper after an adjourned meeting was one of Chanyeol’s favourite sounds to hear. It meant finished work, progress, responsibilities being fulfilled. But now the shuffling meant something different: escape, freedom, permission to leave the stuffy meeting room. For the past four years, he had been brought into the meeting room to discuss current events which used to only involve his father but now required the presence of the Crown Prince, as well. He had been ecstatic the first time King Junmyeon agreed to introduce him to how the meetings worked, since eighteen-year-old Chanyeol was an ambitious, but terribly naive soul. The excitement quickly worried down to boredom after the redundancy, but Chanyeol still paid attention. However, these days he found himself thinking of only a pair of eyes framed with heavy eyeliner, curved lips, and a sweet, sweet voice.

He was the first out the door and grabbed his black hoodie to pull over his way-too-formal button-down and a dark baseball cap from the nearby maid whom he had ordered beforehand to hand him the items of clothing. After that close call during broad daylight, Jongdae only allowed him in the bar when it was pitch black outside. Chanyeol didn’t mind. He felt more comfortable travelling in the dark anyway, with only the dim streetlights to guide his way. It eased the ever-present tension in his shoulders.

Sliding through the door, Chanyeol scanned the bar. There were a few people seated in the back, but they hadn’t noticed him come in so Chanyeol wasn’t too worried. In fact, he was more worried about more important things, such as the lack of a certain brunet. He walked up to the counter and nodded to Jongdae before launching right into his question, “Where’s Baek?”

“Not here. Come back another time.”

“Can you get him for me?”

Jongdae sighed, before tugging Chanyeol’s cap down to cover his eyes. “He’s at home. I probably shouldn’t be telling you this, but I’m pretty sure he’s avoiding you. He asked me to switch shifts.”

“He what?” Chanyeol’s eyes flickered around the room as if Baekhyun was hiding somewhere and was about to pop out in front of him with a cheeky grin and a gotcha!

“Chanyeol, seriously. I know you don’t come for the drinks anymore, ever since you bought a glass for the pretty stranger who became my roommate by your request. All I’m saying is that pretty stranger doesn’t want to see you right now. He’ll talk to you when he wants to.”

“Did I do something wrong?” Chanyeol asked, obviously hurt. Jongdae didn’t have the heart to respond and only shrugged. “Tell him I’m sorry. Tell him if there’s anything I did wrong, it’s because I’m an idiot and I don’t know any better. Tell him-”

“You should go home.” When the Crown Prince didn’t budge, Jongdae had to physically push Chanyeol away from the countertop. Sighing, Jongdae nodded towards the door. “Go.”

He kept his eyes on the Prince as the latter exited. Chanyeol lingered outside the bar for a few minutes, standing still, before tugging down his cap and walking into the darkness.

¤¤¤

“Oh my god, what happened to you?”

Luhan waved off Kyungsoo’s concerned question as he seated himself beside the chef. The dining room was practically empty at the moment, since Luhan had dragged himself out of bed at the latest possible hour only because he was hungry. He had wanted to stay buried under his blankets in a cocoon of shame, but his growling stomach convinced him otherwise.

Shovelling a spoonful of cereal into his mouth, Luhan barely managed to hold up his head with one hand. “I didn’t sleep at all last night.”

“What were you doing? Fighting a war?” Kyungsoo asked, as he gave Luhan another once-over. His friend looked like a real-life zombie, with his tangled hair, baggy sweats, and dark circles under his eyes made even more prominent by his pale skin.

“Well, it’s a long sto - oh god, I’m not here, I’m not here,” Luhan threw his spoon down on the table and dropped down on his knees to crawl under the table. Thoroughly confused, Kyungsoo glanced up just in time to see Prince Sehun approach him. Kyungsoo noted that the Prince seemed to be in a similar state of distress as Luhan, with his disheveled appearance and matching dark circles.

Kyungsoo stood up and bowed. “Good morning, Your Highness.”

“‘Morning, Kyungsoo,” Prince Sehun narrowed his eyes, looking around the room. “Hey, have you seen Ji-eun around? I swear she was right here…”

The chef glared down at the crouching boy at his feet, who was making an X with his hands and shaking his head dramatically. Sighing, Kyungsoo said, “I haven’t. Why? Were you looking for her?”

“Yeah, tell me if you see her, okay?”

After Kyungsoo’s nod, the Prince thanked him and left, noticeably disappointed. Once he made sure Sehun was out of the room, Kyungsoo pulled Luhan up to his feet and glared at him. “You better have an explanation.”

“No, it’s really not a big deal-”

“Luhan.”

“Shouldn’t you be more worried about my health after almost drowning?”

“You’re alive and arguing with me. I think you’re fine.”

Slumping into his chair, Luhan continued shoving his face full of food to delay responding. After swallowing, he looked up meekly at Kyungsoo’s impatient stare. “I might have accidentally possibly made a huge mistake?”

“Luhan.”

“We kissed, okay?” Luhan blurted out, before slapping his hands over his mouth.

Kyungsoo’s mouth dropped open, then closed, then opened again. The chef walked back and forth behind Luhan, successfully unnerving the older boy, before plopping back down in his seat again. He brushed back his hair before letting out a deep breath. Luhan had finished his breakfast now and with nothing else to distract him, he ended up fiddling with his fingers while he continued spilling words to fill the silence.

“There were fairy lights, Soo. Who can resist fairy lights? And he had these magical flowers that glowed and he decorated the pool and-”

“He brought you back to the pool?” was the only thing Kyungsoo picked up on. “After everything that happened?”

“Yeah, he did. And you know what else he did?” Luhan dropped his head on the table with a thud, voice coming out as a muffled cry. “The idiot confessed to me.”

“And let me guess, you ran away after he smooched you?” Kyungsoo asked dryly. Luhan gave a tiny nod that Kyungsoo wouldn’t have noticed if he hadn’t had his eyes trained on the older boy the entire time. The chef straightened his back, eyes widening as the Prince’s earlier appearance and behaviour made much more sense in retrospect after obtaining this bit of information. “Wait, seriously? You actually ditched him? Huh, I guess you two are even now.”

“Okay, no, he ran away before kissing me. I ran after.”

“Like it’s any better,” Kyungsoo scoffed. At Luhan’s glare, he said, “Okay, so what, is your plan to avoid him forever or something?”

“Well, that’s what you’re doing with Jongin. And it seems to be working fine.”

Kyungsoo whacked Luhan’s arm lightly. “I’m only doing this because it’s unrequited. For you and Sehun, it’s actually mutual. That changes a whole lot of things.”

“What am I supposed to do then? If he actually likes me, then it’s going to make things so much harder to leave and I won’t even be able to see him after all this since he’s going to be married to someone else.”

“So you’re just going to leave him like that? No closure?” Kyungsoo asked softly, “Believe me, I know how it feels to never be answered. It’ll eat away at him. He’ll never move on.”

“He will. He has to. Even if it hurts now, he’ll be able to get over it,” Luhan lifted up a corner of his lip, saying sarcastically, “After all, he’s a prince. He’ll get his happy ending.”

Kyungsoo was about to reply but got cut off when the doors burst open once again, this time a servant rushing in instead of the Prince. Luhan’s stomach dropped. He knew what she was going to say before she even opened .

This is it.

“Miss Ji-eun, your family’s waiting for you.”

Both Kyungsoo and Luhan stood up and made their way over to the waiting servant. Kyungsoo kept shooting concerned glances out of the corner of his eye, but he couldn’t say anything when the servant was still present. Besides, even if he were to speak, he doubted Luhan would have listened with the way the older boy was twirling his hair absentmindedly.

“Ji-eun?” Someone called from behind them once they were out in the empty - or what used to be empty - hallway. Kyungsoo felt Luhan tense at his side.

Slowly, almost as if it pained him to do so, Luhan turned with a stretched-out grin, “Oh, Prince Sehun. I didn’t think I would bump into you here.”

“I’ve been looking all over for you. Where have you been?” The Prince came to a stop in front of them and only then did he greet the chef and the servant with a nod. “I, uh, I would appreciate it if I could have a minute to talk to Ji-eun alone? We have some things to discuss.”

The servant nodded and left, but before Kyungsoo could follow, Luhan stopped him with a tight grip around his wrist. Kyungsoo looked up at the Prince, who was clearly getting more impatient by the second, and after weighing the consequences of defying either boy, he decided that his job was slightly more important than his friend’s love life.

“Good luck,” Kyungsoo said to Luhan before prying the latter’s fingers off his wrist. He ignored Luhan’s traitor hiss as he hurried away, whispering apologies under his breath.

Now alone, the two stood in silence in the empty hallway for a beat until Sehun opened his mouth, effectively breaking whatever spell was casted, “So-”

“I can’t deal with this right now,” Luhan all but yelled at the Prince before practically sprinting past him.

“Seriously? You’re running again? Why can’t you try to deal with your problems for once? Why can’t we talk this out like normal, rational people?”

Stupid Sehun and his stupid long legs caught up to Luhan all too quickly. I’m not ready yet. The older boy gave up and just shut his eyes, waiting for the storm to hit him full force. Just as he expected, Sehun grabbed his wrist and whirled him around like he was nothing more than a mere doll. Slamming his hand against the wall beside Luhan’s head, the Prince waited until both of them caught their breaths until he continued calmly, “Look at me.”

Luhan slowly forced his lids open. He couldn’t meet Sehun’s eyes and resorted to staring at his nose. After hours of preparing himself for the close-up of the Prince, he still couldn’t handle it. It was all too much, too overwhelming; the red eyes, bedhead, wrinkled clothes, and worst of all, pained eyes.

“Why are you running away from me?” Sehun sounded so hurt, so quiet and desperate and Luhan hated himself. But he couldn’t do this, he screwed everything up royally and before he got in even more trouble, he had to stop it. The Prince let out a soft sigh, “Ji-eun-”

“Don’t call me that!” Luhan shouted, screwing his eyes shut once again. Composing himself, he stated once more, “Don’t call me that.”

“Okay,” Sehun replied tiredly, “Then what do you want me to call you?”

“I…”

“Just. What did I do wrong? I need to know what mistake I made so we can make up. I thought the kiss was perfect, but if we’re moving too fast, I can change the pace to suit your style. I’ll do anything, but you have to let me first. Please.” The Prince pleaded, his eyes searching for what, Luhan didn’t know.

“What if I left?” Luhan asked instead, “In the end, it’s not entirely up to you. The people’s opinions factor into this as well, and we all know what they think of me.”

“That won’t happen. I won’t let you go. I thought you lov-”

“Don’t.”

“But I know you do!” Running his fingers through his hair in frustration, Sehun nearly screamed, “I’m supposed to be the brat here, not you! So just tell me why you’re avoiding me and why you want to leave when it’s clear you lo-”

“I said don’t!” Luhan raised his volume to match the Prince’s. “Don’t bring that up. Okay. I love you. I admit it, so what? What satisfaction does that bring you? I’m not princess material, far from it, you have no idea. You think we can get married? You think everything’s fine now that you know I love you?” The older boy forced a chuckle. “You don’t know anything about me.”

“You’re so dumb.” Sehun dropped his head to rest on Luhan’s shoulder. When the shorter boy shifted, Sehun drowsily commanded, “Stop moving. You don’t know what you’ve done to me, you stupid idiot. I barely got any sleep last night because I was so worried over you. And now you say all this nonsense and you don’t even let me say anything.”

“Prince-”

“Sh. It’s my turn to talk. Yes, I don’t know you as well as your childhood friends and I can’t talk to you normally like Kyungsoo and Jongin but I do know you. I know the way you smile when you get surprised and the way you laugh when you do something clumsy. I know how you hate bitter things to no end and you prefer your eggs scrambled rather than fried. I know what your voice sounds like when you’re tired and annoyed and that you sing really well - but only when you think no one’s watching. I know all that useless stuff, but that doesn’t mean we’re meant to be together, right? But you know what? I don’t care. I love you, too, and that’s enough for me.” The younger boy paused, thinking, then tacked on, “And since you’re making rules up about what we call each other, I’d prefer it if you dropped the Prince. Here, we’re just Sehun and Ji-eun, remember? I told you that last night already.”

“But-” But it’s not Sehun and Ji-eun. It never was Sehun and Ji-eun.

“Shhpt,” Sehun pressed a finger against Luhan’s mouth. “Okay?”

Luhan rolled his eyes. Sehun probably planned that entire speech out last night after Luhan left, and even though it was the cheesiest thing he had ever heard, it was enough for Luhan to nod. The Prince was trying here. The most he could do is accept it in return so Sehun would feel better, even if these were the last few moments they would spend together. There was no point in dragging Sehun into drowning alongside Luhan.

The Prince let out a relieved, heaving sigh as he slipped his hand into Luhan’s smoothly. “C’mon, I’ll walk you to meet my future-in-laws.”

Luhan slugged him across the shoulder, obviously influenced by hanging around the violent chef, but soon slid into easy laughter as well. The two slipped into easy, comfortable (pointless enough to take his mind off other matters) banter as they walked with hands still linked together, and before he knew it, they were standing in front of the giant mahogany doors separating Luhan from his family. He tried to distract himself with the fancy vine engravings spiralling up the doors to fight the nauseous feeling, but it was to no avail.

Sehun, noticing his disquiet, squeezed his hand comfortingly. “Hey, I think your family’s going to think that you didn’t miss them with that look on your face.”

“Can you come in a little after me?”

“Why?” Sehun’s frown deepened when Luhan pulled his hand away from the Prince’s.

“I don’t think the other families would appreciate seeing the Prince with someone that’s not their daughter.”

“But…” At Luhan’s pleading look, Sehun relented, “Okay, fine. Five minutes?”

“Ten.”

“No one’s going to notice-”

Luhan abruptly pulled Sehun down - he wasn’t going to tiptoe - to press a kiss to the corner of Sehun’s mouth. It did an effective job of shutting the Prince up. Luhan tried not to think of it as their last kiss. Blinking, Sehun bent forward further to get another kiss, but Luhan pulled away.

“Goodbye, Prince Sehun,” Luhan kept the emotion from seeping into his words and quickly turned around. With every step he took towards the door, the lighter his chest felt yet the more his heart hurt. Finally, the gig would be over. But this thing - whatever it was - with Sehun would be over, too. I should be happy, shouldn’t I?

“See you,” Sehun called after him, and Luhan could hear the grin in his voice.

I’ll see you. But this time, as Luhan.

¤¤¤

Luhan wondered just how many rooms of the Castle he hadn’t explored yet when he pushed open the heavy doors to yet another enormous room lavished with creamy walls leading up to impossibly high ceilings. He expected to only see his family with slightly teary eyes waiting to greet him. But instead, he was subject to witness all the contestants’ families in there as well, hugs and kisses flying everywhere with a bawling family member found in every metre radius. He had to shove through the crowd to try to get a better look to see where Ji-eun and his dad was. All the suffocating bodies and garbled chatter was making him slightly dizzy.

“Dara, my baby!” Luhan was roughly shoved to the side when a weeping woman ran past him.

Dara, who he didn’t know was standing behind him, pulled him up to his feet and made sure he was alright. “I’m so sorry, Ji-eun. My mom gets a little… hectic when I’m away from home for too long.” Turning to the woman who pushed Luhan, she scolded, “Pay more attention next time.”

“How can I, when it’s been months since I last saw my precious baby?”

“Mom!” Dara cried, shying away from her mom’s hugs in embarrassment. Luhan laughed at the sight, a longing to see his own family striking him and pushing him further into the mass of people.

His breath got knocked out of himself when someone barrelled into him, wrapping tight arms around his body. A familiar, warm scent overrode his senses, and he relaxed into the hug.

“I missed you so much,” cried Ji-eun. She pulled away to get a better look at her brother, and Luhan saw the tears streaming down her cheeks. Her shoulder-length hair was folded up under the baseball cap she donned and her curves were hidden by Luhan’s old clothes. Sniffling, Ji-eun laughed, “I can’t believe how different you look now. How come you don’t seem like me at all? But you don’t look like the old you, either."

“I missed you, too. How’s everyone back home? Where’s dad?”

“There’s been…” Ji-eun tilted her head, a conflicted expression crossing her face. “A few changes. And as for Dad-”

“I’m here,” said his father as he stepped out from the crowd. Dad was dressed up in a sleek suit - probably a rental. Luhan braced himself for a long lecture, but instead, Dad surprised him by wrapping him in a warm hug. “It must have been difficult for you.”

Tears sprang into Luhan’s eyes at the kind words, unbelievable warmth filling his chest as his dad pulled back to say, with understanding eyes, “It’s finally over now.”

“It’s over,” repeated Luhan. Something stuck in his throat. “It’s over. It’s over.”

“C’mon, let’s end this,” said Ji-eun. His sister grabbed his hand and led him through the crowd to one of the restrooms located at the side of the room. With the feeling of someone’s hand in his own, the pressing on his chest lessened considerably.

Once he pulled open the restroom door, revealing the expensive, pearl floor tiles and stalls the size of their rooms back home, Ji-eun let out an impressed whistle. She entered the stall, voice lit with wonder. “I never thought I’d set a foot into the Royal Castle. Granted, I never thought my brother would dress up as me, either.”

“Dad looks good. You do, too.”

“So do you. I never thought you could have pulled it off for this long, but look at you. All dressed-up. All pretty.”

Luhan leaned against the granite countertops and stared into the mirror, eyes trailing over his features. A soft smile rested on his face. “I know.”

Rustling alerted Luhan of Ji-eun’s clothes being tossed over the stall door. Luhan caught it with one hand and unfolded the baggy clothes. It smelled foreign, yet homely at the same time. A frown crossed his face, however, once he examined the t-shirt closer. “Seriously, Ji-eun? You couldn’t have picked anything else? You know I never wear this shirt.”

“What’s wrong with pink?”

“It’s not the colour that’s the problem. I wear this to sleep! I can’t go out in public wearing my pajamas.”

“Well, it up. No one’s going to care.”

After he had changed in one of the stalls, he came out to see his sister adjusting the dress Luhan was previously wearing - now, it belonged to her. The two locked eyes through the mirror.

“You changed a lot, you know?” Ji-eun asked quietly. “But not in a bad way.”

“Why? Because I didn’t freak out over being called pretty? I admitted to wearing pink by choice?” Luhan joked, ruffling his hair. In just minutes, he was going to walk through the Royal Castle looking like how he always wanted to look. Makeup-free, lean stomach, short-cropped hair. A small voice niggled in the back of his mind, What would Sehun think when he sees you like this? Will he recognize you? Luhan shook his head. It doesn’t matter. Not anymore.

“Hm, besides that. You seem more… confident? More self-aware? More comfortable in your own skin.”

“It’s probably just me being happy that I’m finally able to be take off that wig.”

“I don’t think so,” Ji-eun disagreed. “It’s not just that. What happened in the few months you were here?”

“Oh, right.” Luhan snapped his fingers, remembering the list of updates to hand over to his sister so she could catch up on everything. Her eyes scanned the sheet quickly, eyes full-blown saucers by the time she was finished.

“You almost drowned again?” She grabbed onto his shoulders, checking for any injuries. Ji-eun backed off once Luhan assured her multiple times that he was fine. “You really struck the lottery this time. Without those friends of yours helping you out, I have no idea how you could have managed to last this long.”

Luhan silently agreed and watched his sister make her way out the restroom. His pulse quickened, his breaths coming shorter, as he steeled himself for his grand entrance as Luhan. This was the final step.

He straightened his back and in a breath. He was ready.

¤¤¤​

It was easy, so far. It felt right. Everything was back to normal. Ji-eun smiled at the other contestants and stopped to chat with them, looking completely dazzling in the dress that complimented her slim figure. If Yixing saw her now, he would fall for Ji-eun all over again. Luhan was perfectly content just watching his sister flitter around from person to person as he observed from a distance.

By the time the twins reached their father, they were both surprised to see that Prince Sehun was keeping Dad company. Luhan was this close to making a one-eighty turn, but Ji-eun’s death grip kept him from escaping. She knew her baby brother too well.

The Prince was the first to notice the twins, and as soon as Ji-eun was within arms-reach, he grabbed her into a huge bear-hug. Luhan immediately looked away, a tight feeling constricting his throat. At Ji-eun’s surprised squeak, Sehun let go with a laugh. “I’m sorry, I was just so happy to see you again.”

“Is that right?” Ji-eun laughed along nervously, and gave Luhan a look.

“I see Your Highness is close with my daughter?” Dad asked, shooting his son a look, as well. Luhan raised both his eyebrows and shrugged, keeping his eyes away from the Prince.

“Yes, sir,” beamed Sehun. “And Sehun’s just fine. No need for honorifics.”

When Sehun sidled up to Ji-eun again and threw an arm over her shoulders, Luhan saw Ji-eun stiffen and slip out the note Luhan gave her before, checking for any clue as to why the Prince was acting so friendly. Except Luhan hadn’t written anything regarding his feelings for Sehun, just that the two had gotten close over time as friends. He couldn’t tell his sister that while he was pretending to be her, he managed to kiss the Prince multiple times, which basically meant the slip of paper didn’t help at all in this situation. Ji-eun figured out judging by her questioning stares towards her brother.

Sehun followed her line of sight and noticed Luhan at last. He blinked, taken aback, and leaned in real close. Luhan swallowed hard, leaning back, but Sehun just kept staring. Oh my god, he knows-

“You two look so alike! Ji-eun mentioned having a twin, but I didn’t think you two would look this similar. You’re practically clones!” Sehun let out an amused laugh and pulled back. Luhan let out a relieved sigh, partly because they were safe and partly because Sehun being that close was sending his heart into overdrive. But, admittedly, he was a tad bit disappointed. He quickly demolished that thought, shame burning his face up. I’m not hoping he’s going to find out. I’m not.

“I’m sorry for not introducing myself earlier,” said the Prince. He put out a hand. “I’m Prince Sehun.”

Luhan plastered on a smile as he shook the Prince’s hand. “Oh, I know. I’m Luhan.”

“Nice to meet you, Luhan.” Luhan was about to retract his hand, but the Prince wasn’t letting go. Sehun was staring intensely at Luhan again. “Hey, has anyone ever told you that you look good in pink?”

“Excuse me?” asked Luhan, eyes wide.

Sehun wiped off his serious expression with an easy grin, “It’s probably because you and Ji-eun look exactly the same. She looks especially good in pink, too.”

“Ah, I see,” responded Luhan a little too late, words left unheard. The Prince had already diverted his attention back to his sister and the two were whispering to each other, lost in their own little world. It felt alien, being the outsider when he was so used to cracking inside jokes with the Prince all the time. He felt alien. Was this what he looked like with the Prince? Was this how the other contestants felt whenever they saw Sehun paying especially close attention to Luhan (as Ji-eun) all the time?

Luhan forced his eyes away, only realizing then that his father was long gone. He managed to drag himself over to the wall. It took him a few moments to realize that there was someone watching him.

“What do you want?” Luhan asked, lifting his head.

“Just wanted to check up on you,” responded Luna as she joined him, leaning against the wall beside him.

“Like what you see?” Luhan made a grand, sweeping gesture towards himself, smiling as he did a small turn.

Luna tilted her head, pretended to actually contemplate, before nodding firmly. “It’s way more easier to be around you when you’re you.”

“You didn’t like the wig?” asked Luhan, grinning good-naturedly. The joke fell flat as Luna continued to fixate her probing stare on him, choosing not to respond.

All of a sudden, slim arms reached up to wrap around Luhan in a hesitant hug. It lasted for a few seconds before Luna pulled away, leaving Luhan slackjawed. Luna never hugged anyone. She wasn’t an affectionate person, not even to her own family. So for her to spontaneously spring this hug on him was probably one of the biggest surprises of Luhan’s life.

“What was that for?”

Luna shrugged and looked away. “You looked sad. And wipe that smile off your face. It makes you look that much sadder.”