Kyungsoo didn’t think of himself as a nosy person.

More than reserved, Kyungsoo just liked to keep to himself and give other people personal space, because he knew how it felt to have your thoughts intruded by an unwanted visitor. Kyungsoo liked being alone, and so he respected those who wanted to be alone as well.

But when Kyungsoo was worried, he found himself peeking over the barrier set up and inching his toe over the line. Ji-eun was sick with a fever of forty degrees Celsius so Kyungsoo couldn’t help but fret over her condition. He found himself visiting her room once he had free time with another bowl of steaming chicken noodle soup.

Kyungsoo knocked politely and called out, making his presence known. When there was no response, he furrowed his brows and turned the doorknob to find her room unlocked. Normally, he would have left at that, but the possibility of Ji-eun unconscious didn’t allow him to back away.

The chef walked in shaking his head at the incredible mess of a bedroom. Clothes were haphazardly thrown to all corners of the room to the point where he couldn’t even tell what colour the floorboards were. Despite the inanimate habitants, JI-eun was not in sight. Sighing, Kyungsoo set the bowl on what little space he could find on the dresser and decided to start off with making his friend’s bed. Looking back, he realized maybe it would have been better if he had just left Ji-eun’s room the way he found it instead of digging deeper.

After moving the stuffed deer aside, he picked up the corners of the sheets and spread them across the bed. Out of the corner of his eyes, he spotted a flash of grey slide to the ground. Kyungsoo didn’t give it any attention until he had finished his current task.

He bent down to pick up whatever item of clothing had flown off the bed during the process of flinging bed sheets, and froze in a half-crouch. Not believing his eyes, the chef gingerly held up the clothing in bewilderment. It wasn’t that Kyungsoo had never seen briefs before - in fact, he was wearing a pair right now - but he didn’t know what to think about finding a man’s underwear in Ji-eun’s bed.

Ji-eun had scoffed when he brought up what people had thought about her and the Prince, but his faith in her words were wavering as he continued to stare incredulously at the briefs he held in his hands. Slowly, he set the underwear down and stood up. His eyes were out of focus when he exited the room, mind swimming in a sea of unclear thoughts.

Is Ji-eun really who I thought she was?

¤¤¤

The silence in the washroom was suffocating, filling up every edge, every surface, but Luhan thought he was the only one who felt it. Luna was rummaging through a khaki bag she had told a servant to bring her during their trip to the girls’ washroom. The girl perched on the edge of the marble countertop, inches away from the nearest sink, and Luhan wondered if turning on the tap and “accidentally” spraying her with water would get her attention.

He wisely decided not to once she scooped out a stapler with a victorious gleam in her eye. A little scared, Luhan asked, “Why do you have a stapler in your bag?” as his mind ran to the memory of ten-year-old Yixing accidentally stapling himself and how much he had bled.

“It’s more useful than you think.”

“Oookay.” Luhan flinched whenever the stapler pointed in his direction. Despite her possible weapon, Luhan cleared his throat and straightened his back, trying to appear as if he wasn’t bothered. He needed to work through this with Luna. “I know you’re Ji-eun’s best friend and all, but I also know there’s someone who keeps kicking my shin whenever Prince Sehun so much as looks my way during dinners, and someone’s spreading rumours about me so all the other girls talk about me and glare at me because of what they think I do with Prince Sehun. That someone… Is that someone you?”

After a long pause, Luna asked in a strange tone, “Why do you think it’s me?”

“I didn’t want to think it was you at first, but I don’t know, just the way you act recently - not to mention you ruining my dress, like, two minutes ago - it all points to you.”

“I admit it, the shin-kicking was me.” Luna swung her legs childishly and leaned back on her arms until her head touched the mirror behind her. “And I didn’t kick you every time he looked your way, I just kicked you whenever you spiked his interest because that’s exactly what you’re not supposed to do, remember? Those were just reminders that you’d get in deep trouble if Prince Sehun actually ended up liking you, except you obviously didn’t catch the meaning behind them. You even told me back in your room that it’s time for you to leave, so I’m doing what I can to help. Oh, and the rumours? I thought you knew me better than that. I don’t gossip. It could have been anyone other than me, honestly, and you didn’t help your case much by being so anti-social and introverted. Not to mention, you’re the Prince’s favourite.” Sensing Luhan’s startled expression, Luna drawled with a smirk, “Don’t deny it, Lulu, it’s obvious.”

“I - I don’t know what to believe.”

“I know. I’m obviously not the Luna you thought I was.” Luna shrugs. “Being so nice all the time was taking its toll. It’s hard, y’know? But it’s not like that wasn’t a part of me either, but it’s just, I guess I wasn’t showing the entire me, since I know people always find the real me hard to agree with. I don’t expect you to trust or forgive me, and even if I tell you I didn’t do anything wrong, you’ll think I’m lying. But at least believe me when I say I’m sorry. About ripping your dress, among other things.”

Her expression screamed sincere, but her eyes were so black, it was unsettling. Luhan pressed his lips in a straight line before replying, “I don’t thi-”

In a flash, Luna pushed herself off the ledge and grabbed tightly onto Luhan’s hem, tugging him this way and that. Luhan, uncomfortable and surprised at the random act, tried to crane his head to see what she was doing. “Luna-”

“Wait, I’m almoooost…” After a few well-placed staples, Luna smoothed out her rumpled gown and stood up, examining her handiwork. “Done. There.”

Glancing up in the mirror to see what Luna was talking about, Luhan turned so his back was facing the mirror. The length of the dress was remarkably shorter and the frills lining the hem were gone, but other than that, it looked brand-new. Most remarkable of all, the hole was gone. Mouth dropping open, Luhan stretched out his dress to see if the staples were visible, to no avail. “How did you-”

“I told you, more useful than you think,” She smiled, teeth not showing, and Luhan wasn’t sure if it was still the stapler she was talking about.

¤¤¤

Luhan found himself wandering the hallways of the Castle after leaving Luna behind in the washroom. She had made it clear there was nothing else he’d get out of her, so he decided to go on a small adventure and explore the huge building that he’d probably only seen one twentieth of. Luhan hadn’t felt like seeing the Prince dance with other girls, so he’d been walking by himself for a good five minutes. All the hallways looked the same, making him feel trapped in a gigantic maze of doors and windows. It was giving him a headache, and Luhan needed some fresh air. His cold wasn’t getting any better and going back to his stuffy room was not an appealing option.

Stopping the nearest servant who was re-positioning the frame of a large portrait of their previous King, Luhan asked, “Where’s the nearest exit?”

The servant had looked up at him with puzzled eyes, “I’m sorry, Lady Ji-eun, but aren’t you supposed to be in the banquet hall? The dancing test isn’t over yet.”

“I know,” Luhan grinned sheepishly, “But I didn’t feel like dancing.”

“Ah, I’m sorry,” The servant bowed again. “I should have known.”

Luhan, startled, gestured for her to lift her head. “There’s no need to apologize.”

“If you take the next left and then go to the end of the hallway, there’s a white door that leads straight out to the garden.”

Luhan thanked her, and was well on his way down the corridor. When he rounded the corner, he was pleasantly surprised to bump into Kyungsoo. Waving his hand, Luhan smiled brightly, “Hey, Soo!”

The chef barely spared him a glance before making a sharp turn, completely ignoring the older boy. Confused, Luhan brushed aside the weird behaviour when he spotted the white door the servant told him about.

He twisted open the doorknob and pushed it open to reveal a whole other world. On both sides of the pebbled pathway Luhan was walking on were neat rows of shrubs and trees of every kind, all in an orderly, aesthetic fashion. Venturing a little deeper revealed more colours among the sea of green, blooming flowers whose names were lost to Luhan, but their beauty was unmistakable all the same.

There were a few forks but Luhan chose to continue going straight until he reached a patch of roses. From there, an opening could be seen in between two large hedges he hadn’t noticed before. Can I actually leave the Castle from here? Luhan glanced behind him to see if anyone was watching and soon after entered.

His hopes were slashed when he realized it was simply a maze. Ah, might as well blow some time here.

At every possible opportunity, Luhan turned right until he reached the centre of the maze. He wasn’t sure how much time he had spent meandering, but shrugged his worries off. No one was going to miss him.

The middle of the maze was bordered off with a ring of hedges and a large, marble statue of Cupid stood in the centre. There was a wooden bench to the right of the statue, and when Luhan made to sit down on said bench, he noticed someone sitting next to Cupid.

“Prince Sehun?”

Sure enough, the Prince lifted his head to lock eyes with the older boy. Sehun was sitting with one knee up and the other leg straight out on the ground, grey button-down crumpled from his position.

“What are you doing here?” Luhan asked, his eyes never straying from the curled-up Prince as he himself sat down on the bench.

Sehun shrugged. “I didn’t feel like dancing anymore.”

“You looked like you were having fun, though.”

“Not really, after you left.”

Luhan gulped down the lump in his throat, pulling down the shorter hem of his skirt self-consciously. The Prince was just joking with him, right?

“I…” The Prince started again, letting his head drop back. “I came here to think, too.”

Luhan waited patiently for him to continue as he tapped his feet against the ground. He heard the Prince exhale, and looked up to find the Prince staring right at him. Luhan didn’t drop his gaze, either.

“I’m not even the Crown Prince and yet I feel all the pressure. Especially when the whole country’s watching the progress on finding the perfect bride. Y’know, you’d think all the girls here have a fair chance at winning this competition, but you actually don’t. The advisors only let me choose from a select few, the ones whose parents and background would benefit our country. The ones with wealth, basically.”

Sehun didn’t miss the flash of emotion in Luhan’s eyes, but it passed so quickly the Prince didn’t have a chance to analyze what it meant. The older boy asked, a thin thread of tension weaved into curiosity, “Why is it so bad to marry a poor girl?”

“After my father married Queen Krystal - she was a maid at the time - they had been in the face of massive controversy and disapproval. But it turned out, more people were romantics and loved seeing the classic Cinderella tale play out. The advisors don’t want that to happen again, since it’s risky and pointless. And now that Mom recently fell unconscious from her sickness, things have been pretty hard and the Council’s been saying like she wouldn’t be so weak if she had ‘pure’ blood,” Sehun growled the last part and clenched his fists.

Luhan hummed sympathetically, standing up and making his way to the base of the statue to sit down next to Prince Sehun. He could see the Prince looking at him from the corner of his eye. “It doesn’t matter whether you were born into royalty or not, it doesn’t change who you are as a person or who you choose to be. And besides, they’re probably just jealous our Queen’s so strong that they’re doing whatever they can to pull her down.”

The Prince startled Luhan by laughing out loud, and the latter watched his eyes shimmer with mirth and pearly whites showing with wide eyes. Sehun suddenly took Luhan’s hand into his, surprising the older boy even further. “Thank you, for listening to me rant without judging me. Or, at least, not voicing your judgement.”

“It’s fine - ah!” Sehun stood abruptly, pulling Luhan up with him. Their hands were still interlocked as the Prince pulled Luhan close, letting his hand wrap around the latter’s waist.

“This dance is a thank you,” Sehun whispered with a smile into Luhan’s ear, sending shivers down the older boy’s spine. Luhan immediately pushed the Prince away, hand covering his face to hide his blush. He could hear Sehun’s frown as he asked, “What’s wrong?”

“On one condition,” Luhan let his hand drop as he stared at the Prince in determination, “I dance the guy part.”

“Oh for Chri - I’m the guy here! And I’m taller!”

“Yeah, but I want to try dancing the guy’s part,” Luhan stubbornly insisted. “Take it or leave it, Prince.”

Sehun ran his fingers through his hair in frustration, but Luhan’s hawk-eyes caught onto the amused smile the Prince had on when he finally agreed, “Okay. Fine. Come here.”

Luhan couldn’t wipe off his grin as he set his arm on the small of Sehun’s back and interlocked his fingers in the Prince’s. The Prince scrunched his nose when he set his hand on Luhan’s shoulder, whining, “This feels so weird.”

“Welcome to my world, sweetie,” Luhan laughed.

“Sweetie, huh?” Sehun smirked, watching Luhan’s smile slip off at his teasing tone. “You must be so comfortable with me now.”

“Slip of the tongue, Your Highness. Won’t happen again.”

“Awe, I got demoted from ‘sweetie’ to ‘Your Highness.’”

Luhan chuckled and accidentally stepped on Sehun’s toes. “Oh, sorry about that.”

“We don’t have music. It’s a little bit more difficult,” Sehun commented, the corner of his lip tugging up, “Here, why don’t you sing? I know you’re good at singing.”

“Erm.”

“C’mon,” Sehun pouted, pulling out his puppy eyes. Luhan rolled his own eyes. “For me?”

“Fine.” Luhan bit out before starting off a simple melody. His attention was focused on three things: singing, dancing, and all the places where Sehun was touching him, so he missed a beat or two. But he could hear the Prince mumbling, “one, two, three, one, two, one, two, three,” under his breath to guide the both of them.

Luhan was enveloped in a warm bubble of bliss as the two of them whirled around the little ring to the sound of his voice, until the Prince attempted to dip him, only to result in Luhan bumping into the statue and crumpling to the ground, the Prince following soon after. The two boys were on their backs, laughing, as they gazed up at the baby blue sky, puffs of cloud wisping by.

The older boy felt Sehun’s stare, and sure enough, when he turned his head, he met the Prince’s dark eyes. He remembered how he felt uncomfortable with Luna’s black eyes, but with the Prince, he was at ease. He felt as if he could stare in them forever. Wait. Luhan widened his eyes. Did I just… think that? Right after Sehun told me that he’d never marry me since I wasn’t rich?

“That wasn’t too bad now, was it?” The Prince’s dopey grin squeezed all the air out of Luhan’s lungs.

“It was fun,” Luhan replied simply, trying to sort his feelings. This was all temporary, he knew, but it was honestly fun being with Sehun, almost terrifyingly so. Something weird settled in his stomach at the thought.

Luhan cleared his throat. “Hey, Sehun?”

“Mm?”

“Why did you leave?”

He felt the Prince stiffen, and a heavy feeling coiled in his chest. The laughter from before was slipping away from them, but he let it go for answers. Sehun broke their little staring contest and turned his head so Luhan was left looking at his profile as he responded, “I just went back to get the plushie. I wanted it to be a surprise, so I didn’t tell you.”

Both of them knew that was bull. Luhan clenched his jaw. “I know you left to get out of kissing me. I’m okay with that, but you shouldn’t have riled me up in the first place with your prince act.”

“It wasn’t an act.”

“Oh, really?” Luhan scoffed. He sat up and dusted off the dirt on his dress. “I’m supposed to believe that? You, right now, I don’t know whether this is the real Sehun or if it’s just part of your mask.”

“Why are you so - I thought we were having a good time, so why are you picking a fight?” Instead of replying, Luhan made a move to leave, but Sehun gripped his hand to stop him. “I’m sorry. That came out all wrong.”

“Did it?” Luhan said flatly.

“I’m sorry, I,” Sehun let out a breath, and turned his open, sincere eyes towards Luhan, “really am. I really wanted to do all those things for you, and I want to know you better. I’m sorry I can’t tell you exactly why I left, but I won’t do it again.”

Seeing Luhan hesitating, Sehun tugged on his hand and gave a heart-breaking grin, “Can we still be friends?”

“Friends.” Luhan’s face twisted, before morphing into a hesitant smile. “I can do friends.”

A cough interrupted their moment and both of them turned to find Jongin standing at the gap between two hedges, staring at them with an impassive expression. Sehun quickly rose to his feet and approached his butler, who in turn stared hard at the ground, before saying, “Your Highness, the King requires your presence in his office immediately.”

“Ah, alright then. I’ll see you later, Ji-eun.” Sehun glanced back at Luhan before giving a cheeky wave as he left.

The older boy knew, once the Prince was gone, that Jongin was upset. Luhan gingerly neared the butler and asked, “How long have you been there?”

“Long enough,” Jongin curtly replied. “Just what are you doing, Luhan? You’re supposed to screw up the tests and get eliminated, not slow dance with Sehun whenever you have time. Have you forgotten the reason why you’re here already?”

“I know. It’s just… hard.”

“I’ve been in your shoes before, okay? It’s easy to fall for Sehun when he showers you with attention, but that doesn’t necessarily mean he likes you. I’ve been by his side long enough to know what happens to girls who are brave enough to confess. And even if he somehow likes you back, do you know how quickly he moves on to someone new? You’re smarter than this, Luhan.”

“I can handle this on my own. But you were the one who shoved us together half the time, and now you’re against it?” Both of them met eyes at that, Jongin’s held a storm and Luhan’s a steely front. “Is something bothering you?”

The butler frowned, “I did it because I thought you wouldn’t have fallen for him anyway, and he treats you differently so I just - it was a stupid experiment to see how he would have reacted, but now. Now, you don’t possi-”

“Don’t worry, I won’t do anything. I’m not stupid. I know he won’t ever like me if he knew who I really was. Half the time, I’m not sure who I really am anymore.” Luhan smiled wryly. “I’ll try my best to get eliminated, but I… I wanted that moment to last a little bit longer. Is that too much to ask?”

Jongin stared at him for a moment. “Are you saying you like him?”

“I’m saying I’ll go back to my room.” The older boy stifled a yawn and started backing away. Jongin took an unsteady step towards him. “I need some rest.”

¤¤¤​

Luhan’s head pounded with every step he took. That conversation with Jongin right after the whole situation with Sehun was a little bit emotionally taxing, and his head was a complete mess. Things with Sehun couldn’t have gotten that bad, right? The Prince even said so himself. Can we still be friends?

Friends. No more and no less.

As he rounded the corner to his room, he stopped in his tracks when he spotted Kyungsoo waiting in front of his door. The chef had his arms crossed over his chest and was leaning against the wall, head lowered with bangs flopping over his expression. A grin stretched across Luhan’s face as he bounded up to the younger boy. “Soo! What’s up? I saw you earlier today but I guess you didn’t see me-”

“I’ve been mulling over this all day, but this isn’t something I can ignore,” Kyungsoo cut him off uncharacteristically and bit his lip. Luhan faltered, then nodded. A flicker of panic fluttered throughout his entire body as Kyungsoo fidgeted, trying to phrase his words properly. “I went to check up on you but you weren’t there. There was - I found a pair of briefs on your bed when I was cleaning up your room. I’m sorry I was snooping around, but I don’t know, I was trying to help. I guess what I’m trying to ask is… Is there a good reason for this beyond what the other girls would assume if they found out?”

At this point, Luhan was trembling noticeably. He hadn’t planned on Kyungsoo finding out this way, or finding out at all. He was supposed to have left quietly and never talk to anyone from the Castle again, resuming his normal life before this all happened. But now it was too late, and that look on the chef’s face was enough for Luhan to start backing up slowly. The fear choked up in his throat, somehow preventing him from speaking.

“Who was it?” Kyungsoo looked as if he didn’t want to do this to Luhan, but he persisted with the questions nonetheless, “Was it the Prince? Some servant? Was it… was it Jongin?”

“It was me.”

Luhan’s voice came out shaking, a weak impression of his normal voice, and it didn’t sound like himself at all. Kyungsoo’s confused expression prompted him to slowly reach up and take off his wig, his short locks springing up. Luhan gulped down the terror, and for the first time, he admitted out loud, “I’m not actually a girl. Or Ji-eun, for that matter.”

When the chef wrapped his mind around what Luhan had said, he stumbled back as if he was hit in the face. Luhan fisted the wig in his hands before pushing open his door and gesturing for Kyungsoo to enter. The chef took faltering steps into the room, his eyes flickering all over the place, anywhere that wasn’t Luhan.

The older boy gestured for Kyungsoo to sit before he launched into a shortened version of what he’d gone through that caused him to make this odd decision. Everything from his twin sister to why he kept lying to when he was expected to leave the competition. Luhan exhaled after vomiting the entire story and examined Kyungsoo carefully, gauging his reaction. The chef hadn’t moved an inch ever since he sat down and his expression gave nothing away.

At last, Luhan asked cautiously, “What are you thinking?”

“I can’t believe...” Kyungsoo paused, still not looking up. “Was everything a lie?”

“No, I’m not that good of an actor.” If it was a day ago, both of them would have cracked a smile at the lame joke, but everything changed the instant Kyungsoo entered his room without permission. “I’m still the same person you knew before, just with a different name and gender.”

“Those are huge changes, Ji-” Kyungsoo stuttered, “- I don’t recall you telling me your real name?”

“It’s Luhan.”

“Luhan,” Kyungsoo rolled it over his tongue, tasting the foreign name on his lips. He stood up and bowed, before walking up to the door. “Those are huge changes, Luhan. I - I need some time to absorb everything you told me.” As if it was a last-minute thought, Kyungsoo hastily added, “Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone about this.”

After the chef left, Luhan collapsed onto his bed, still shaking from what had just happened. For whatever reason, he was now scared. Scared of what Kyungsoo thought of him, scared of what would happen if Kyungsoo didn’t keep his promise, scared of who else might have found out.

Most of all, he was scared of losing a friend.