"You know, I really don't understand Haruki and Donghae's relationship." Jiyong raised his glass to his lips and took a long drink. 

Onew raised an eyebrow. "They're dating. What's not to understand about that?" 

"But it doesn't SEEM like they're dating," Jiyong replied. "It's like they talk even less now than they did before they started dating." 

"Maybe it's so you guys won't make fun of them," Ryeowook mumbled, his cheek on the countertop as he blinked at them.

Kyuhyun, who had recently started joining them on drinking nights, reached over and patted him on the head. "Wookie, you make no sense when you're drunk." 

"'M not drunk," slurred Ryeowook, sitting up in protest and pouting. 

"That's what you say every time you get drunk," Onew shot back before turning to Jiyong. "I don't get it. What do you mean by they talk less than before?" 

"Like this," Kyuhyun replied. "Hey, Haruki-" 

"What? No! I'm not being a girl! You be her and I'll be Donghae," snapped Jiyong. 

"I don't want to be Haruki!" 

"Well, I-" 

"Guys, guys." Onew sighed and pushed his glasses higher onto his face. "Rock-paper-scissors to decide, okay?" 

Jiyong looked at him in astonishment. "That's a good idea. You're smart." He turned to Kyuhyun and nodded. "He's smart." 

Onew just sighed. He missed Siwon. Without him, and with the addition of Kyuhyun, Onew had been relegated to the role of the responsible friend. He'd never before realized how stressful it was. And without Siwon's authoritative personality, he wasn't nearly as good at it. 
Translation: the others were hammered long before Onew had realized what was happening. 

Kyuhyun had lost at rock-paper-scissors and was now pouting as well. Jiyong hopped up from his barstool and came up behind Kyuhyun, placing a hand on his shoulder and leaning close to his ear. "Hey, Haruki." Kyuhyun mumbled something and turned away, ducking his head down as far as he could. 

Ryeowook burst out laughing and clapped his hands. "That's exactly what she does!" He hiccuped and leaned forward eagerly. "Okay, what about when they walk into the same room?" 

Kyuhyun got up and moved a few steps back from Jiyong. The lab analyst had his head down as he pretended to shuffle forward. "Hey," Jiyong said. Kyuhyun jumped and looked up, flashing a quick smile before staring at the ground and scurrying away again. He made it two steps before he collapsed against the counter laughing. Onew felt the corner of his mouth twitch upwards. 

"Hey, have you ever seen them during Chief Park's weekly meetings?" Kyuhyun asked. 
"No, I never go to those things," Jiyong replied. 

"He's always playing with her hair and things when Chief's back is turned." 

Jiyong leaned close to Kyuhyun's face and began to tuck imaginary strands of hair behind his ear. Kyuhyun repeatedly swatted his hands away until Jiyong pretended to kiss his cheek, sending the group into fresh hysterics. 

"Is she scared of him or something?" asked Kyuhyun. "You'd think she'd never had a boyfriend before." 

"She hasn't," Ryeowook replied. 

"Oh." Kyuhyun blinked. "Wait, really? At her age?" 

"What's wrong with her age?" All four of them turned around at the new voice and found Donghae seated beside Ryeowook, smiling at them benignly. He raised his glass. "Hey guys." 

"How long have you been there?" asked Kyuhyun. 

"Not long," Donghae replied. "Hey, have you seen what Donghae does to people who make fun of his girlfriend?" 

"What?" Onew asked as Kyuhyun and Jiyong backed away warily. 

"I'll show you after I finish my drink," Donghae replied. He drained his glass and began slowly setting it back on the table as he counted softly, "Three...two..." 

Kyuhyun and Jiyong bolted out of the bar and Donghae jumped off his chair, racing after them. Onew and Ryeowook exchanged amused glances, before realizing that the other three had left them with the tab.

"Damn it, you guys!"