Just to clarify, yes, my older brother did write this. (i wrote the first 4 lines and he continued when my computer was unguarded). I came back to see him caught in the act, and I was severely attacked in his embarrassment. Therefore, I took the time to read what the he had written this time, and of course I could not hold back the copious amounts of laughter that emitted because this is so damn stupid. But golden. So i HAD to share.
Crack? Yes. Prepare your minds for something extrodinarily original in the woogyu tag. (and its not even woogyu... LOL) 
Enjoy! And hopefully say thanks to my brother
_cloud

As the Forest Dweller marched up to King Sungjong, captured and ready to report; the scene takes a different turn than expected....

“Enter.”

There the King was, sat on his large throne with a lazy pose. Both his legs cast to the side of the armrest, laying on the thing with his arm perched on the other side of the chair, boringly holding his head up while twirling the Phantom Cane: the Arc ‘en Ciel.

“I take it you have news for me, Dweller?” King Sungjong huffs, throwing the cane away and the guards scrabbled to catch it. “Did he speak?”

“I made him,” he curtly replies. Nothing more, nothing less. 

“Enough! I do not possess the slightest desire to waste time with you, Dweller!” the King echoed, through the chambers. “Your place shall be carved into your own skin, a worthy remembrance for those who do not appease my orders!”

“But sire, I have followed your every command!” begged the Dweller, falling to his knees at the mercy of King Sungjong.

Sungjong pondered a moment in time, only a few seconds and his decision became reinforced with mental irons that would not waver. Though he took deep pleasure in seeing the Dweller beg. It only satisfied him for him to suffer.

“Brand him with the mark of the holy . Directly to his pale cheeks and cast him away. As a warning for all those who dare forget that I am their sole ruler.” King Sungjong declared, forcing the pummel of the Arc ‘en Ciel to clash with the marble flooring.

The echo doomed the Dweller, it was the final ruling of any king. The brand of the ? I shall be forever shamed! The Dweller wildly dashed for escape routes, eyes panicking for an opening. A sign of freedom.

“It is time Dweller,” said the punisher holding an elongated iron, “let your fate be sealed.”

The sizzling of the brand crackled as it neared the Dweller. Two guards seizing his arms, locking him face down and bottom up. The ragged clothes were torn away revealing a moon colored cheek, smooth to the touch. The punisher smiled, he loved his job.

“No, no, no!” the Dweller resisted with all his might however the guards only forced his head down. He could feel the heat radiating off the iron as it neared his . Farewell, he thought, to the ity of my skin.

“Halt! Perhaps I have been to harsh on our little Dweller. He has taken a bold chance, and we have been harsh. I shall do the branding."

To Be Continued...