{ 11 }

"Why aren't you eating?" I asked her. 

Her smile looked forced. "I'm not hungry, I already had a big breakfast earlier." 

She was lying.

Haeri never stayed long enough to eat breakfast. I knew that more than anything. I had always come over to her house before going to school, and we would take the bus together. Her mother knew me well. She had once ordered me to write down everything I needed to know about her; allergies, favourite cereal, what to do and what not to do when she was on the "time of the month", and what specific mood swings of hers that indicated what she should or should not eat during the day. When Haeri found out about this, she got so embarassed that she wouldn't talk to her mum for three days. When things became okay again, I never told her that I still kept that list. 

I was about to ask her what she had for breakfast this morning when her phone suddenly beeped with a text. She reached into her bag, and her eyes lighted up when she read the message as I tried not to look like it bothered me.

I averted my gaze.

I focused on my lunch.

And waited. For the usual bid of farewell. 

"Baek, I have to---"

"I know." I said, doing my best not to sound strained. 

"I'll see you later okay? I'll drop by to watch you play." she grabbed the last of her things and squeezed my arm. She didn't even stayed long enough to wait for me to say goodbye. 

It turned out that I was put on the bleachers and wasn't allowed to play for the match. I couldn't believe it! After all the practices and I went through just to sharpen my skills for this important day, I was ordered to sit through the whole match. Everyone else was getting ready, doing warm ups, push-ups, while I was here, like a freaking imbecile---the team captain that wasn't allowed to play. 

I didn't know it was going to be my brother to substitute coach. It never crossed my mind when Minhyuk told me about a college student---with kick hockey skills---taking over coach for a while would be Baekbeom hyung. 

My fingers turned white by gripping my hockey stick too tightly as I tried to regain my sanity. This wasn't supposed to happen. First my parents. Then Haeri. And now he was bloody taking hockey away from me. 

Baekbeom looked up from his checklist, ordering my teammates to enter the field now. His lurky eyes caught mine, and he sent a devilish grin indicating, "Sorry face. I win again." Then he stomped out of the room, along with everyone.

I got up, and sent a fistful punch towards a locker. 

My team won, but I didn't stay back to watch it. It was too painful. Far too painful for me to bear. 

The soft wind my face and pushed my jersey against my body. It was autumn now. I watched how the leaves were changing to a deep shade of orange, and some were painted yellow. The truth is, everything was moving in a fast motion, creating a blurry of images around us that we didn't even have the chance to grasp the memories to stay with us. It felt like only yesterday when Haeri and I had a dinner picnic at this very spot, where we cycled together and crashed upon a bush, when we untangled some of the balloons that were stuck to the trees. 

It felt like only yesterday we were close. Today, we were strangers. Strangers that knew secrets of each other, knew basically everything about each other, but had lost the connection that once made us best friends.

It hurt me more than anything else. More than my screwed up life. 

I felt a hand on my shoulder that made me startled. 

"Hey," she peered and smiled, taking a spot beside me. "The kids told me you were here. I was searching all over for you." 

I looked down at the space between my knees, avoiding her brown eyes. "Why?" 

"I should be the one asking you that. Why didn't you play?" The question suggested that she did come to the game.

"It doesn't matter." I told her. But then again, it was probably for the sake of Baekbeom. 

Suddenly I heard a sharp intake of breath. She was staring alarmingly at my injured hand. 

. I totally forgot about that.

"It's nothing," I said quickly, afraid she would be worried to death. But she was already reaching out into her backpack, and took out a clean bandage and a small bottle of iodine. That was the one thing about Haeri. She always carried emergency stuffs in her bag. Probably because of her mum. 

Holding my hand, she meticulously washed the cuts using water. Then she dabbed some iodine with a tissue and wrapped the bandage around my hand. She was quick, but gentle. She didn't even questioned what had happened. And I let her. I let her touch me. I let her gentle fingers cure my wound. 

Haeri noticed I was still wearing the pink bracelet she had given me for our two months of friendship. I glanced to her wrist, but there was no sign of the same bracelet. I felt my heart sank. Instantly I pulled my hand away.

"I'm sorry. . .for everything." she whispered softly under her breath. 

Why was she apologizing? I fixed my gaze back at her and saw her sunken eyes. She looked pale, like deathly pale. Her collarbones were prominent, and I saw how her cheekbones were potruding. She looked exhausted, like she hadn't eaten in days. Without asking, I grabbed her wrist and realized how small and terrifyingly thin they were, like a skeleton. 

What was going on?

"Haeri." I looked at her, my tone had turned serious. "When was the last time you ate?" 

"What?" she tried to laugh, but it came out forced and panicked, like she was found out. Then realization dawned on her. She immediately released her hand away from my grip. 

"I eat fine, Baekhyun. Just stay out of my business." 

"Stop lying to me."

I grabbed her hand again, refusing to let go this time. "When was the last time you ate?"

From the look on her face, I had gotten my answers. 

"What did Baekbeom tell you? . It was him, wasn't it?" 

She wouldn't look at me in the eyes. 

Bloody hell. 

"Did he tell you to stop eating? Did he tell you to starve?" I was grabbing her shoulders now, and shaking her continuously. I was getting more desperate by the second. 

", Haeri, just answer me already!" 

She was staring at me now, her eyes bloodshot, stained with fatigueness. She removed my hands from her shoulders and stood up. 

"It's my choice." she concluded. "Just stay the hell out of it." 

{A/N} 

I apologize for all the curses. Apart from that I hope y'all enjoyed this chapter. I may not frequently update any more because I have to study and stuff so please be patient with me. ❤ have a nice day!