Chapter Finale – Mark Ver.

3 years later

“There is no way that I’m forgiving that bastard for anything,” Jackson last said before we parted ways. I never forgot those words because I always hope that they weren’t true. In my heart I knew that Jackson would keep that promise.

If there was one person that he would pick even over his family, it was Mark. Even I don’t think I would ever reach that level.

I stared at the TV screen of an electronic shop from behind the glass. Jackson’s face was plastered over all the newspapers and television screens all over Korea as of now. The news was flying around like wildfire and it couldn’t have been any clearer. There was not a doubt that when pictures of Nayeon and Jackson holding hands were published just about anywhere, it was confirmed that they were officially dating.

“Good for him,” I thought, brushing away the bitterness. “At least he’s gotten over us.”

I continued to make my way through the busy streets and finally turned into a quieter one where a cemetery lay.

Here I was, back in Korea, the place where my life became bipolar. When Rylynn passed away, I decided to bury her in the place where she happened. Although I lived in LA during the year, it felt more appropriate to leave her remains where they came from in the first place.

I walked past the gate of the cemetery, my dress blowing with the wind. I always made sure to dress properly when visiting my daughter. It wasn’t something I could do every day after all. It was a pretty day as the morning sun was beaming on the place, giving the grass a pretty shine.

I marched over to Rylynn tombstone with a box of pictures in my hand. Seeing the carved glass with her beautiful name written on it, I knelt over and leaned on my knees for support. In contrast to the previous year I came for a visit, I did not feel the urge to cry.

I was happy. Happy to finally spend time with the person I loved the most in the world.

My hands began to dig in the box, taking out my favorite pictures and sticking them on her tomb. It was something I did every year, and this year wasn’t any different.

The pictures made me beam even wider than the sun.

I missed her. I missed her hair. I missed carrying her at night.

“Are those for me?” I heard from behind. Turning around, I felt a rush of cold run through my body.

“No way,” I answered back to blond headed man. I hadn’t seen him in years. I didn’t even have the heart to watch any GOT7 videos after I went back to the states. Whatever they were up to nowadays was a blur to me. “These are my daughter’s. I’m not planning on sharing,” I continued jokingly. I observed his sophisticated attire; nice, clean dress pants, and white blouse with a tie and a black fancy vest.

Mark came over and sat next to me on the grass, pointing at the picture of Rylynn and me in the park.

“She didn’t look like you at all. She must have taken after her father,” he commented, pushing his hair back.

It had been forever since we were able to talk comfortably like that.

“So…” I began to shift subjects. “How’s life without me?”

Mark gave out a light chuckle.

“Less emotional.”

I burst out laughing, holding my knees together.

“No kidding. Women are a lot to handle. I’m sure you’re not as bipolar anymore,” I asked rhetorically.

“I still take medication, but yeah. I guess so.”

Mark’s gaze dropped to the tombstone on front of him as he sighed heavily.

 “How are your parents?” he asked seriously this time. I sat up properly and gave him a prominent glare, as if he were asking the obvious.

“They still hate you, if that’s what you wanted to know,” I reminded him with a light heart, not wanting him to feel too bad about it.

“Of course they do. Who wouldn’t?”

The wind began to blow gently, giving me a bit of fresh air to breath.

“I don’t,” I whispered quietly, but loud enough for him to hear. I see him from the side of my eye, turning and smirking. “My parents have their own opinion about you. I have another,” I clarified. Mark let out a sigh of relief.

Not wanting to dwell on that subject for too long with the fear of hurting his feelings, I began to shift my position to a lot more laid back and comfortable one, letting me legs spread on the grass.

“So… Any hot singers you’re into lately?” I asked, not really expecting a serious answer. But Mark’s expression hardened. There was a long pause.

“Do you want to go out for a cup of coffee any time soon?” he ignored my question and simply stared at me with a funny gaze. I sat in an uncomfortable position, not really knowing how to respond at first.

“Well…” I struggled to search for the right words. “If you aren’t busy with being famous and all, I guess we can go before I head back to LA later this week. But only if you get rid of that nasty blond hair.”

“Deal.”

He beamed lightly at my response, but I could tell that he wasn’t finished. Mark leaned forward, tilting his head and sliding his fingers through my hair. He pressed his lips on mine. But in contrast to the last time he did this, it was soft, gentle, and sincere. I could sense the change in his way of conducting himself. Though it had only been a few minutes since we had been sitting on front of Rylynn’s grave, I could sense that Mark was no longer that angry bipolar kid who couldn’t get a hold of his emotions anymore.

Upon releasing, he bit this lip and smiled dimly, staring deep into my soul.

I quickly dusted off the dirt on my pants and stood up, escaping the discomfited silence.

“What about a bit later today?” I asked to break the unbearable tension. “I’ll just go to the hotel and get some things settled.”

“I’ll meet you right here,” he beamed even wider before focusing back on the tombstone. I picked up the scattered pictures, my eyes not leaving him for even a second.

My heart began to pound. Maybe. Just maybe I could learn to love him in the way that I had always forced myself to.

I took a few steps backwards, getting ready to leave until Mark turned around again.

“Question. Do you still sing often?” he asked out of nowhere.

“Ummm, yeah, I guess you can say that,” I answered astonished by his randomness.

“To answer your question from earlier about whether or not I was into a hot singer as of late. My answer is, yes. I do know this pretty hot singer.” His eyes were pointing at me.  

I face palmed inside at his cheesiness and his weird expression. Mark always had a sort of hidden humor that came out every once and a while.

“So greesy! You’ve been spending way too much time with Jackson in recent years,” I said out loud. Then it occurred to me that I was curious about something else. “Do you get along with Jackson? After all that drama, I mean.”

“Yeah…” he simply answered with a calm aura. A shower of peace poured over me knowing that Jackson had in fact kept his promise.

I moved backwards and jogged out the cemetery. I was planning on coming back later, when Mark wasn’t distracting me from the reason I was even there in the first place.

Passing the gate, a big thump was heard, making me feel the bump only a few seconds after the impact. I held my hand over my forehead and searched for the person who ran into me. Annoyed, I glared heavily, only to find Jackson in a well suited outfit, similar to the one Mark was wearing.

Just as I was about to insult him for hitting me so carelessly, I held back, remembering that I wasn’t supposed to say anything in a situation like this.

“The only way for me to get over you is if we pretend like we didn’t know each other. And if we see each other in the future, we should just avoid talking to each other altogether,” was what I had suggested before leaving him in the park three years ago.

“Nayeon would be super pissed if I tried to hog you again. And we already know how much anxiety we bring to Mark when we’re together. And besides, how would your fans react when people found out that you were dating a girl who had a baby with your best friend,” I further explained my reasoning for my decision. It was so long ago, but I still remembered every word I spoke, as if I had written it down for a speech.

Both our lips quivered, almost as if we had the urge to say something, but we weren’t allowed. After a few seconds staring into his eyes, debating whether or not I should speak, I finally decided to shut my mouth and give him a simple bow.

Doing likewise, Jackson’s eyes didn’t leave mine, even for a moment. I saw in him a strong urge to tell me something, to move forward and greet me properly, but his mouth moved without words coming out of them.

I felt like I needed to congratulate him for his relationship with Nayeon, but I knew it would come out bitter and insincere.

I bit my lip and moved past him, trying to fight the urge to turn around for one last glance.

In the end, I knew deep down that nothing would be resolved if we attempted to be just friends. I knew that Jackson was the one that naturally made my heart pound like crazy, even when I didn’t want it to. For that reason, being strangers was the only way out; for Jackson’s career, for Nayeon and for Mark. Especially for Mark.

At the end of the day, you can’t always be with the one you love. Life isn’t like that. God had other plans for me, and Jackson was one of them. All these years, I had tried to impose my will, even if it probably wasn’t His.

To me and Jackson, Mark was a part of us. If we ditched him for each other, we would be hurting a part of ourselves. Though I knew that it would take time to get over Jackson, I knew that at least Mark was there; the one who hurt me dearly, but the one who healed me when I was broken, the one who gave me Rylynn, the best gift I had ever been given, even if it was only for a short while.

Mark wasn’t necessarily the one I wanted to meet for coffee later, but life is just that way. You can’t always get what you want. Just like coffee, I had to learn to love it. And frankly, the hard part was to removing Jackson as a possibility.  It wasn’t hard to love Mark. I already did.

Walking away from the cemetery, I glanced past the gate and eyed Mark, who was still sitting on from of Rylynn’s grave. He made circles around the carving of the stone. I could see him sobbing, without caring what people would think.

“He would have been a wonderful father if she was still around,” I whispered to myself.

There were friends that you would risk your life for. Though my parents still weren’t too fond of Mark, and I wasn’t sure what they would do if we were ever to be together, I wouldn’t give up risking my life for him for the world. Just like I always have.

For those of you who love Mark, I started a fanfic/short story about him:

The Unforgiven Sin [click title]

Didn't like this one? Wanted Jackson? Check out the next chapter for alternative ending.

Thank you for always supporting me. I am truly grateful for all your kind words. I read all your comments and feel warm everytime I do. Thank you.

God Bless You!