The vacancy that sat in my heart, is a space that now you hold.

Hyukjae  opened the door to his place listlessly. It felt like his only existence was in this house, with his family. A part of him felt angry that Kangin did not even recognized him even slightly. What is he going to do now? He was not even sure what he would do on normal days such as today. Does he have a job? Who are his friends now? What does he do?

All his friends are mainly celebrities but now that he is not one anymore, does that mean that he does not have any friends now? He slightly massaged his temple; all these thoughts were starting to give him a headache.

“Hyukjae?”

Hyukjae looked up to the familiar soothing voice of his Mum from the kitchen. “Yes Omma?”

“Why are you home so early? Don’t you have to go to work?”

“Work? I have a job?” Hyukjae could not help but looked more confused.

“Yes! Aish! What is wrong with you? Go to the café now before you get fired!”

“Café?!”

Hyukjae’s mum trotted towards Hyukjae and pushed his head down. “TLJ café where else! This kid will be the death of me!” She went on to push him out of the house, as if shooing him away. “Go on, you are already late! I will see you at dinner tonight! Love you, son.”

The door slammed onto his face as he was still trying to get the entire facts sink into his head.

“I work at TLJ?!!”

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I hope the TLJ is still at the same place. Gosh, what is this reality? I am supposed to own a franchise of TLJ, not work in one as a coffee boy!

All these thoughts were running through his head as he ran to TLJ. Thankfully, the café was not far from his place. It was a few bus stops away. After a few minutes of running and panting he was almost there, still running as fast as he could to the café.

When he saw the familiar looking café, he stopped and stood at the entrance. Everything looked the same except there were no photos of him on the wall. There was no ‘Eunhae’ fan made gifts on the counter. The board where fans could leave him messages was no longer there. In replacement, there were cute little pots of plants and some decoration to make the café looked cozier.

“Hyukjae Oppa!! Where have you been all day?!” shouted this petite looking lady from the behind the counter. “You are supposed to be here earlier, I have to go for class!”

It was obvious that she was angry at him.

Hyukjae looked at her helplessly. He does not even know her, now how is he going to convince her on why he was late? Even he found his own reasons ridiculous.

“Err…sorry. I lost track of time.” He apologized and stepped slowly to the counter. His feet felt heavy and even though the young lady was petite, she was really fierce enough to scare him.

The young lady hastily packed her bag and started to walk towards the door. Hyukjae who was rooted to the same spot, was at a loss on what to do.

“Oppa! Get behind the counter! What are you standing there for?!” she yelled again.

“Behind the counter? I worked here??”

The lady sighed. “Oppa, I don’t know what game you are playing, but its not funny. You owe me!” with that she left the café in a hurry.

Hyukjae sighed again. That lady must have been his colleague. Judging by the way she dressed, she should be a university student, probably working part time at TLJ to earn some additional income. He was not really sure how his life in this reality. Is he a full time worker here at TLJ or like the young lady, he was a part timer here too? Who exactly is he here? Who can he ask?

He stood behind the cashier counter and looked around. It was not his first time here. He has been here countless of times and each time he was here, the place would be crowded with elfs queuing to buy bread. The others would all be jostling outside the café trying to sneak a peek to take his photos. Usually he knows the elfs waited long for his arrival so occasionally he does funny poses and let them take all the photos they want. They are always good at the editing of photos. All the photos usually turned out really pretty.

A complete contrast to the current situation. The café was almost empty. In the corner, a lady was typing furiously on her laptop. Her coffee was on the table, along with piece of bread. The place suddenly looked bigger and empty. He felt empty too, as if something was missing.

“Donghae ah….you promised me that you would only take 5 minutes to take your notebook!” manager hyung was still nagging away as he drove. “Look at the time now. We are late and the crew is waiting for you.”

Donghae could hear his manager hyung talking from the moment that they stepped into the car. Its not he was being rude but manager hyung has been going on and on and all he could think about was the image that appeared in the mirror. He did confide in manager hyung but it was quickly brushed aside as they were late for their schedule.

“Sorry hyung……”

The older one turned around during red light and glanced at Donghae who still looked like he was in a daze.

“Are you ok? Did something happen in the dorm? Were Heechul and Kangin fighting or something?”

Donghae turned his focus to the concerned manager. “No hyung, they were just eating. They just talk really loudly and may appear like they are having a fight but they really do love each other too much.”

The manager turned his attention back onto the road. “Ok, get ready. Siwon is already there, we have to finish shooting this video by today because Siwon has to fly off for his drama.”

“Ok.” Donghae answered weakly.

“It’s a wrap!” director- nim’s yells were loud enough to be heard by everyone. Everyone, the crew, the dancers, the cordi noonas, the security all started to clap their hands in unison, happy and glad that the long day of shooting was over. One really should not underestimate how long it takes to shoot a 3 minute music video.

From a distance, Donghae could see that Siwon was shaking everyone’s hands, thanking them profusely for all the hard work. Donghae would have joined him too but for some reason he was not really in the mood to interact with anyone. He was glad that Siwon was around to do all the thanking and the talking because he really is not good at all this social human interaction.

“Thank you director nim, go home and rest ok.” Donghae said his only word of thanks to the director. The director and the crew have been really nice and patient since he was late for the shooting in the morning.

“Yes Donghae, you are welcome. I am sure this video will be cool. You two are pretty talented and make a great team to work with.”

Donghae could only smile.

He grabbed the stool nearby and sat on it, his lower back and legs slightly aching from the repeated dance routines that he had to do the entire day. Siwon was walking towards him, but he looked just as energetic as he was this morning.

“Donghae ah, aren’t you going back to the dorm? You need a ride?”

“No thanks, manager hyung is driving me back since he lives pretty near us. Hmm…can I ask you something?” Donghae lowered his volume, worried that the crew behind him would hear their conversation.

“I was thinking of getting new camera tomorrow since I have no schedules, but….I am not sure. Are you free tomorrow?” Donghae asked, he sounded really fearful of Siwon’s answer. He was hoping that Siwon would be able to accompany him. He can never really go out and shop alone, he usually goes out with one of the members or the managers.

Siwon lightly tapped Donghae’s shoulders. “Sorry man, I need to pack my things before leaving tomorrow night. Dad has been complaining that I am too busy to sit with the family for a meal so I promised them that I would have lunch with them tomorrow.”

Donghae looked down. He could not help looking disappointed.

“No one is free to accompany you?” the pout was too cute and too apparent to be ignored. Even though he is a few months younger than Donghae, he has always felt protective over him. Perhaps its because he is bigger in size and Donghae has always been ……….. child-like. His pure and innocent thoughts may seem cute to the fangirls but is never an advantage when doing formal business. Due to his trusting nature towards others, he was easily duped or tricked by the opportunists.

“Its ok! I will probably go by myself. I have been wanting to get a camera…… and tomorrow is my only free day for this month.” Donghae assured Siwon.

“Ok then, take care and call me if you need anything.”

Donghae nodded. Siwon stood up and walked towards his car. Donghae was close to everyone in the group but he was most comfortable with Siwon. That was why when the idea of sub unit was proposed, he chose to do it with Siwon. However, Siwon’s popularity has sky rocketed tremendously in the past few months that he was always busy. Initially he used to hang out with Siwon a lot more. They would go out for drive or meals together and sometimes even biking together in public, at less crowded areas. He must say that he missed doing all that. Now with Siwon away for filming most of the time, he was left mostly alone.

Knock. Knock.

Donghae was immediately awoken by the loud knock on his room. He rubbed his eyes to get a clearer view of the person standing at the door of his room.

“Donghae ah, hyung is going out for schedule. Don’t forget to have breakfast before you go out ok.”

It was Kanging hyung.

“Ok, thanks hyung.”

“Are you going out today? I thought you do not have any schedules since he had a whole day of shooting yesterday?” Kanging asked. It was typical of Kangin to make sure everyone is the dorm is well taken care of. With Leeteuk away in the army, Kangin was extra protective especially towards Donghae.

“Hmm…I thought of going out to shop later…..” Donghae mumbled sleepily. He was barely awake yet there he was being interrogated by Kangin.

“Shop? Alone?!”

Donghae nooded.

“Aish, are you sure? Anyway, call me later, if I am done with my schedule I will accompany you. I gotta go now!” Kangin gently closed the door and disappeared.

Yes, my new M camera. I am so happy that I finally went out to go get it all by myself. Actually this drive around the city is pretty therapeutic. Just me alone with some nice music. I just have to make sure to drive carefully or all the hyungs will nag at me forever.

It was almost 3 pm and Donghae has been out alone for the past 3 hours. After Kangin’s ‘wake up call’, he was not able to go back to sleep so he got up, eat some breakfast and left the dorm. Apart from Kangin and Siwon, no one else knew that he was going out alone. Its better this way because they are bound to stop him from doing so.

He already knew where to go to get his new camera. For some reason, he felt compelled to take photographs of the things and people around him. Memories are better remembered when there are photos to accompany them. He knows that the elfs have always made fun of him and his photos, with blurred photos and accidentally cropped photos. With this new camera, he hopes to practice and in return for all the elf’s support, he planned to upload photos that are of better quality with this new camera.

For you my darling elfs, now no more laughing at me and my blur photos on sns!

After driving around for an hour, he was starting to get hungry. It was already 3 pm and all he had was breakfast in the morning, no wonder his tummy was churning. He looked around, hoping to find a quiet secluded place to have lunch and coffee.

He was actually in the office district when a small café caught his eye.

That will do, I will go in and have a quick bite, the place looks empty and there are not many people walking around the pavements too.

He carefully park his car nearby, lowered his cap so that his face cannot be easily seen by others. He got out from his car, with his new camera bag clutched tightly in his hands, he quickly walked over to the little café. He was desperate for some food and some good coffee.

I wonder what kind of food and coffee they serve here at TLJ.

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Hi everyone! Yes I am still alive!!!!!!!!! I really apologize for the hiatus, was caught with too many things but I am having my holidays now so I should be able to update once again! Yay! Thank you for staying with me! I really appreciate it!

I will be away for a week but after that I will update this story regularly ok! Please let me know if I have lost my touch since I have not been writing here for 2 months! Let me know if you are still alive too! Hope to hear from everyone soon!

Till next update! Don't kill me for the cliffhanger. Opss.