I put my hand up, telling him to stop. I already knew what he was saying but I couldn't bare to face reality. I turn around to look at Ryeowook. I walk with heavy steps, almost like stomping to sit next to Ryeowook with a dreadful face. I felt as if I was the one to be dead. It sure felt like it. I take the white sheet and pull it off the head.

I shiver gasping. I stare at him hoping that he's going to wake up, that this is a dream. But, no matter how long I stare at him, he won't wake up. I think of Siwon and how he died: gun shot in the chest.

"How did he die?"

"He cut himself on the wrist and then stabbed himself in the chest."

For some reason, I could not cry. As if I was hollow inside.

I pull the sheet over his face.

My mother walks in and I see her on her knees and crying hysterically. I run to my mom hugging her and she grips me strongly. I take her outside trying to soothe her but nothing works.

I get a taxi to take her back to our house. I stay in the hospital filling out forms and giving the doctors information to fill out the death certificate.

I didn't shed a single tear since I heard about the death. I just felt depressed, lonely.

The next day

 I didn't leave my room. I stayed at my bed. Still haven't cried yet. But, my mom said I have to clean out Ryeowook's room