Age 13

Young In goes home after her visit with Jongin.  She kicks off her shoes at the front door, and goes upstairs.  She hops back onto her bed and picks up her phone again.  She texts for another hour.  Mother makes dinner and they eat.  Young In does some homework and then brushes her teeth.  She turns out the light and climbs into bed.

She falls asleep immediately.

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Young In wakes up around midnight.  Which is strange, because she never wakes up in the middle of the night.  She always sleeps very well.

She realizes that she woke up from a dream.  Usually, she loves dreaming--dreaming about falling in love with a beautiful prince, or making lots of money, or traveling the world with a perfect family.

But then she realizes that she woke up from a dream that was nothing like any of those things.  A dream that required a little more sadness than happiness.

She had a dream that one of her closest friends had to leave the country because the company his father worked at was transferring to a distant city somewhere in Europe.  In her dream, her friend got on the plane and she watched it fly away until it was just a dot in the sky.  In her dream, she remembered that there was still a present sitting in her nightstand drawer, a present that she was supposed to give to her friend on his twelfth birthday.  In her dream, the person that she spent nearly every day with, was leaving forever and Young In didn't do anything to stop him.  She never even told him she would miss him.

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Everything happens so fast because Young In doesn't know how she manages to get out of bed and out of the house when it's the middle of the night.  She runs all the way across the street in the dark and presses Jongin's door bell more than once, Jongin's belated present in her hands.

No one opens the door for a long time and Young In starts to worry again.  She doesn't want to cry but her cheeks are wet for no reason.  She waits and waits until Jongin's father opens the door.

Young In nearly shouts and jumps with joy as she throws her arms around his waist.  Jongin's father nearly falls back with surprise but he just pats her shoulder, quietly.  

She cries even harder.

She lets go and pushes her way through the door and into the house, not bothering to greet Jongin's father properly.  She runs upstairs and flings open the door to Jongin's bedroom.

Everything is dark and she's crying so hard that she can't see, so she turns on the light.  

The bed is empty.

Young In runs from the bedroom to the bathroom, and then the guest room, and then to the bathroom downstairs and then the living room.  All are empty.

She finds Jongin's father standing in the hallway, arms folded across his chest.  He should probably be angry, but he's not.  He's smiling.  Young In almost thinks that this is all a crazy joke.

"Jong--Jongin," she stutters, trying to dry her face.  "Jongin..."

Jongin's father comes up to her and buries her face in his shirt.  Young In sniffles and tries not to stain it with her running tears.  After a while, she stops crying, but she's breathing heavily.  Jongin's father doesn't say a word, just her shaking shoulders.  He smells like laundry detergent and coffee and warmth and safety--it all seems so strange yet so familiar at the same time.  Like she was looking for this feeling all her life but didn't know it.  The feeling of being comforted in the arms of a father.

She stops crying.

Jongin's father kneels down and looks at Young In in the eyes.  He's still smiling.  His smile looks so much like Jongin's--bright eyes and happy lips that want to say that everything is better.

"Jongin," he chuckles, smoothing her hair.  "You're looking for Jongin, right?"

Young In nods.  She supposes that she looks like a horrible crybaby now, a mess of a person.  She feels bad for bothering him so late at night.  Jongin's father just squeezes her arm gently.

He holds her hand and stands up.  They walk into the kitchen together.

"We've been sitting here for a while," Jongin's father says, pointing to the kitchen table.  "Having a little talk."

Jongin is sitting there, his head in his arms and his feet stuck into a pair of tattered slippers.  His hair glows under the kitchen lights and Young In wants to cry all over again.  

"Jongin, why don't you tell Young In about our new plans?"

"New plans?"

Jongin lifts his head and yawns.  He looks at Young In and rubs his eyes as if he just noticed her in the room.  "What?"

"Jongin and I came up with a plan," Jongin's father says, letting Young In sit at the table across from him.  "I'm sure you'll like it."

"Oh yeah," Jongin sighs sleepily.  "We made a plan.  Hehe."

Young In keeps quiet, putting her hands in her lap as she sits down.  She looks at Jongin for a long time--his sleepy eyes, his pouting lips, his tousled hair.  They both look like a mess.

"I'm not going to London," Jongin says, scratching his ear.  "Dad decided that I should stay here and go to school here, and spend time with you here, and go to the skate park every weekend.  That's what I want to do, too."

Young In can't believe her ears.  But then she sees Jongin's father and Jongin smiling their identical smile and so she thinks that everything must be true. 

"Are you lying?"

"No,"Jongin's father laughs, a hearty laugh.  "We aren't lying.  Jongin really is staying.  For as long as he wants."

"Yep."

This time, it's Young In's turn to smile--even if it a shy smile, it's still there, braces and all.  "Okay," she says.  "I think that's what I want, too."

Jongin's father ruffles her hair and laughs again.  

Young In wishes she could somehow put that laugh on recording because each time she hears it, her heart swells up and everything seems so perfect, so alright.  But then she just assumes that that's what fathers do, laugh to make everything alright.  She just didn't know that until now.

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Before Young In leaves, she realizes that she's still holding Jongin's present.

"Oh yeah, this is for you."

Jongin looks surprised but he takes it and opens it--the present that he should have received over a year ago.  He tears open the wrapping paper carefully, afraid that Young In might yell at him if it rips.

All goes well until Jongin opens and finds that it's a book.

"A book."

Young In nods.  "I asked the store man what book I should get for a twelve-year-old birthday and he said maybe a book would be nice."

"Why did you choose this book?"

"Because I asked what book I should get and he said this book would be nice."

"You remember all of that?  I thought you bought this last year."

"Of course I remember all of that," Young In says.  "I remember everything."

Jongin nods, too.  He's glad that Young In is giving this to him now, better late than never.  But also because he feels a year ago, he would have hated a present like this.  Now that he's older and smarter, he thinks a book is the best present he could ever get.  

"The Giver.  Cool.  I'll read it."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

1:40 am