“You’re running from your feelings…” said a familiar voice.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about…”

“You’re running away from your feelings…” repeated the voice.

“How can I be running away from my feelings when I admitted them? I was in denial because I didn’t want to admit that I’m… I’m… I admitted my feelings, so I’m clearly not running away!”

There was a sigh.

“La mia piccola rosa…” There was another sigh. “You’re avoiding the person you love,” I cringed hearing that word. “Don’t say that word,” I sneered. He ignored my protested words and continued on. “…and I can see it’s hurting you.”

I folded my arms over my chest, turning my back towards him. “You don’t know what you’re saying. I think crossing to the other side made you lose your mind.” I sensed he was smiling at me, a saddened smile.

“You were always able to hide your feelings well from others, but not from your mother and I, even after we divorced,” he stated as he appeared in front of me.
 

I didn’t realize I was crying until he placed his thumb upon my face, wiping the fallen tears away.

“Damnit… my pride.”

“You know, you’d lose your pride all together if you held your emotions in for too long.”

A small smile managed to form on my crumpling face. “I could never win against you…”

“Never did, never will.” He agreed, smiling at me in return.

“You have to let me win just once.”

“If I did that, it wouldn’t be considered a win. Now, don’t change the subject, la mia piccola rosa.”

That smile immediately disappeared from my face. I just wanted to let this go. I didn’t like talking about it with Youngbae, let alone admit it. What makes him think I’d talk about this with him?

“La mia piccola rosa, you’re hurting and I hate it when you’re hurting. I don’t like to see you like this.”

Silence.

“I know why you’re avoiding him - you don’t want to deal with my feelings. You’re scared of them.”

My body tensed. He saw the ice forming over me. My eyes were cold, just as my face. “I’m not supposed to be feeling like this!” I exploded. “I wasn’t supposed to fall for him! That’s not how it’s supposed to work, dad! He’s supposed to be my best friend and nothing else.”

My chest ached. It was never supposed to be like this… I bit my bottom lip, trying to hold back the remaining tears that wanted to escape.

“Dad, these feelings that make my chest ache, that makes my heart erupt erratically, they’re a burden, a heavy burden. I already have enough to deal with, deal with enough pressures. These feelings… they’re stupid, and they’re just adding more weight. Quite frankly, they’re useless weight.”

A look came across my father’s olive toned face. I know that look; that look hardly came over his face, even when he was alive.

“Why are you disappointed?” I asked coldly.

 Silence.

“Forcing your feelings away is unhealthy. Getting over them naturally is fine, but being forceful isn’t right and it’ll only make you feel worse than you already are.”

It was too late. A flood of tears split from my eyes. I turned away; I didn’t want dad to see me like this. My fists unclenched, my tensed body now relaxing. Relief immediately washed over me. This feeling of relief - it was in my body when I exposed myself to Youngbae.

My cries were silent.

I didn’t want to embarrass myself any further.

“La mia piccola rosa…”

My eyes jolted open at the thunderous sound of my Hello Kitty alarm clock. My groggy filled eyes lingered over to the buzzing machine. My hand trudged over to the snooze button, silence filling the room.

“Dad… I seriously hate it when you’re right.”

A/N: Ciao, my readers~! How is everyone? ^^ So.. with this chapter, this is gonna sound weird, but it came to me while I was sleeping... in the middle of English. I so wanted to have this as a chapter, so here ya go~! I wouldn't say it's a filler, but more like a... I guess a preview of what's to come, I could say and going a little bit inside of how Anika's feeling. I'm sorry it's short, by the way! Started the next chapter IMMEDIATLY. Hope you enjoy~