It's not a gun this time, it's the point of a knife against his back, digging into his skin with an aching sluggishness. He bends backwards to keep it from breaching skin, but the tip scratches and the cut starts to sting and there's something keeping his feet in place. The same hand as the last dream is cupping his chin again. The man's finger caresses his cheek, but Sehun is too tense to react.

"Didn't I say 'next time'?" The man laughs and digs the knife deeper. Warm blood trickles down his spine and this ought to be the end because he is dying and the world seems to be getting ever so brighter. He must be approaching heaven...

 "...ehun...Sehun!" There's someone shaking his shoulders violently. His ribs hurt, he wants to tell this person to stop. His mind is still a scatter of random words and thoughts, not entirely related to his situation, and after a few seconds, he eventually recognizes the voice and groans.

"Jongin...stop..." He sits up slowly and leans against the mound of pillows that is behind his head. There's a light shining onto his face from the ceiling, too bright for comfort.

Jongin releases his hold on Sehun's body and leans back in his chair. Sehun looks around the room, wondering where he is. He appears to be in a hospital bed, the white curtains are drawn on both sides, and there's the slightest smell of medicine and alcohol in the air. "Sehun, damn," Jongin says. "You were having nightmares again."

Sehun nods because of course he knows that. He's only ever told Jongin about these reoccurring dreams of his, nightmare after nightmare every night. Sleeping was a living hell for him, and he'd rather be buzzed on coffee and caffeine for the rest of his life if this was to keep happening forever. He hadn't told him about the most recent nightmares though. He wanted to take the time to comprehend them first. His nightmares have never been this direct.

"What happened to me?" He asks Jongin, who looks distracted.

"Well, to put it nicely, you broke a couple ribs because someone was trying to assassinate you. Oh, and Tao saved your life, so you should be grateful to that, quote-on-quote, 'son-of-a-'." He looks at his pitiful friend covered in white blankets who suddenly looks guiltier than he's ever felt in his entire life.

So now Sehun owes Tao a life-debt. Which is a problem, because he still hates him, just a little. Plus, he doesn't like owing anyone anything, and he couldn't very well pay back a life so easily. He buries his head in his hands and rubs his temples. He feels a massive headache coming on. 

"." Is all he can say in reaction to Jongin's explanation. He's insanely frustrated at practically everything right now. Why can't things go right? "Why is this even happening to my family?"

"Because you're in possession of something they want." An approaching voice says to him from his left. Tao walks around the curtain and takes a seat on the corner of the bed by Sehun's feet. 

"What the hell do I have?" 

Tao looks at him with an expression that clearly reads, are you kidding me? "Sehun, we both know that's a ridiculous thing to ask. The right question would be, what is it that you have that they want?"

The headache is definitely getting stronger by the second. "Okay. Sure. What is it that they want?"

Tao shrugs passively. "I don't know. That's what I'm trying to find out." 

That headache was close to a pounding in his skull, like someone's hitting his brain with a baseball bat. "Tao, can I please have some time to talk with Jongin? Privately?"

The bodyguard stands, slightly bows his head, and says, "Sure." He walks away briskly. 

"What's up, Sehun-ah?" Jongin asks. He's pretty sure he knows what he's about to say.

"I want him to leave, Jongin. I can't stand having him in my house, I can't stand having him in my life, I can't stand all this happening. It's too much for me." He shuts his eyes tight and he feels the bed dip as Jongin sits down next to him and wraps his arms around him slowly. He's not used to too much physical contact, but he allows this one hug because he needs it. Jongin pats his back and he lets the stress ball up inside of him and struggle to find its way out.

He feels trapped, to say the least. Like the walls are closing in on him and all he can see is black nothingness. Like he's pushing against an invisible force, but it just won't let up, and he's quickly losing strength. It's a fight he can't win because he has no power over the circumstances and that's when he realizes what this feeling is. Powerlessness. He's always been in control, one step ahead, and this is the first time in his life he feels like his opponent-- whoever that's supposed to be -- is that one that's one step ahead. It's a helpless feeling in the pit of his stomach and so Sehun feels like he's about to do something he hasn't experienced in years -- cry. 

 "Stop that, Sehun. You'll feel stupid." Jongin whispers to him as he hears the other boy begin to sniffle. 

"I already feel stupid." His breath is starting to come out in hiccups. Jongin lifts Sehun's head from his shoulder and holds him at an arm's distance away.

"Sehun, compose yourself. Everything's gonna be fine and this is no time to start crying on me. Sobbing isn't going to fix and you're better than this. You can do it." He stares, determined, at his friend, who hurriedly wipes his eyes free of moisture. Jongin hates seeing his friend look so weak.

"Yeah." Sehun lies back down on the pillows, willing himself to feel tired. 

"Do you want me to go?" Jongin asks, now second-guessing himself. Was that the right thing to tell him now? He isn't exactly great at pep-talks.

"Did they ever say when I was going to leave the hospital?" He ignores the question and asks instead.

"They said you're not too badly off. A week. Maybe two. And then you're all good."

Sehun nods, and turns away from Jongin. He feels embarrassed after almost crying. "Tell Tao to come in later?" 

"Sure." The bed shifts and creaks as Jongin stands, and Sehun hears him walk away, leaving him to the deafening silence of white all around him. 

The next to visit him after his short nap, however, is not Tao, but his father. He sits on the chair Jongin was using and interlaces his fingers together on his lap. He leans forward and looks at Sehun, who groggily sits up after his rest. 

"Sehun, I think we should discuss what we should do with school from now on." The man adjusts his glasses. 

"What do you mean?" He feels awake now.

"I talked to Junmyeon," (Junmyeon is Mr. Kim's -- the teacher's -- first name). "And I think we should call back your old tutor. For a little while."

"What? Why would we need to do that?" He hadn't meant for it to come out as a sort of outburst, but that's how it did and he couldn't help but be surprised. This isn't necessary, is it?

"Oh Sehun, calm down." A cold feeling finds its way around Sehun's heart and he leans back on the bed. He hates it when his parents call him by his full name. He takes it as a warning, like if you do something out of line, then you're going to get it. "Look, you were too careless this time. You could've been hurt, or worse, and I'd rather not risk it. Think of me. Think of your mother. Luhan, you remember him, right? It's just until things become more clear."

But when is that going to happen? He wants to ask, but he knows it's no use. His father doesn't know, he doesn't know, and no one can simply predict the future.

His father stands and tells him, "No arguments. It's already been arranged." And he leaves.

That helpless feeling is back in the pit of his stomach. Because that's how it's always been. "Arranged" and unchangeable, and he's so used to just going with it. But now that things are starting to go out of place, a part of him can't help but want to go out of place too. He pushes that feeling back. It's unnatural. Yet sometimes he doubts that.

Things seem to be moving too fast for him. His injury feels a lot better (strangely enough, he heals quite well despite his endless health problems) and he's already supposed to go back to old routines. All these visits have made him re-evaluate everything. When he's alone at night in the hospital, he makes a mental list. Things that have always been there.

-The emptiness of the house in the morning
-Jongin's father driving him
-His best friend always being there at school
-His privacy from classmates
-Mr. Kim teaching his class
-Wu Yi Fan greeting him back at home and answering to his needs
-Not too much trouble from his parents
-Safety and quiet

And what does he have left? Jongin's father won't be driving him anytime soon. Yi Fan won't need to greet him since he'll always be home. Mr. Kim won't even be his teacher anymore, and he might not even see Jongin sitting lazily at his desk with his smirk and sarcasm. Needless to say, he does not get much sleep at night.

Tao visits him on a daily basis.

It makes Sehun feel strange that the reason for the destruction of his life is now the one stable phenomenon in his existence. He accidentally lets this slip one day.

"Funny how you decide to barge in, ruin everything, and become the single thing I can expect." Sehun says, dazed. Tomorrow, Luhan is going to come back to tutor him and that list might as well go to hell. 

Tao leans forward and rests his elbows on the bed and clasps his hands together. "Sehun, I will be the one constant in your life. I will always be here because it's my duty, because you need me. I will be your armor. So what are you gonna do when I go?"

Sehun feels flustered. The bodyguard's words are more than serious -- they hold meaning behind them. And he finds that, no matter how much he despises the presence of Tao, he can't dig out the answer to that question from within him. 

"And that's why the answer is 3xy squared, got it?" The deer-eyed boy asks him with a smile. Luhan tosses his head making his dyed-red/orange hair fly out of his face. Sehun can't focus right and he wants to apologize for it.

Luhan looks like he could be younger than Sehun, but he's amazingly already in his sophomore year of college. He's a good kid and obviously deserves Sehun's attention during his lessons, but the younger boy can't do it. He can't bring himself to do anything more than nod and say, "Yeah." He sighs and chews the end of his pencil, an old habit he had had when he was a kid. 

Tao is next to him on the bed, a ringed notebook on his knees and a mechanical pencil in hand. He spins it with his fingers, twisting it around and around his bony knuckles, a skill Sehun's never been able to master. Sehun's father had gotten him permission to also take temporary leave from Junmyeon's class to be tutored by Luhan. Now that his family realizes the threat is very much real, his parents have been even more on edge about Tao always being by his side. And it irritates Sehun. Required companionship. Compulsorily stuck. 

Luhan glances at the clock. "Alright, it looks like that's all for today." He gives them an eye-smile and stands from the fold-up chair he'd been sitting on for the past few hours. He'd never had to tutor someone this long before, but the pay was good and he liked his pupils. However, he isn't so sure about this newcomer. Zi Tao's sharp eyes and mysterious aura scares him a little. He'd already been notified of the back story. Tao is Sehun's guard until further notice. Luhan was not to disclose this information to anyone else. Luhan is a trusted family friend, and if he wants to keep it that way, he ought to follow rules. He rubs his eyes and yawns. "Bye Sehun! Bye Tao, it was nice meeting you!"

The two boys wave as Luhan walks away, leaving them alone in the hospital room. 

"Tao." He addresses him without glancing in his direction. Tao stands and stretches.

"Yes, Sehun?"

 Sehun waits for Tao to be still and face him. "I think you should stay away from me."

Tao sighs in exasperation. "Are we really going to discuss this again? I won't."

"Why's that?"

"It's my job to stay with you. And with the recent attack, it's more urgent than ever." He's tense. Sehun can hear it.

Sehun clenches his teeth. "I don't think you understand. I don't like having you around. I never have. It's unnecessary-"

"Unnecessary?!" It's the first time Sehun's ever heard Tao yell. "You almost got killed and you think this is unnecessary!? Do you even value your own life?"

There's a prolonged silence as the question sits between them. Sehun doesn't answer. "If it wasn't your 'job', you wouldn't stay here."

"I-" Sehun raises a hand and stops him before he can say anything.

"I'm right, aren't I?" 

Tao is quiet.

"I don't like having you here. You don't like being here. I want my life to go back to normal." Sehun tries to make Tao see his point of view; his perspective. His life has been flipped upside down and he's sick of it. 

"I can't do that, sir." Tao's back to his calm self in a matter of seconds. He smiles and Sehun feels unnerved. He stares into those black eyes and drowns in them -- suffocates in them -- and he's rendered speechless. "Face it, Sehun. I'm sorry, but this is how it is."

Sehun opens his mouth, but his voice holds back.

"I'm sure it'll be over soon." And with a small laugh, Tao leaves the room.

The phone vibrates painstakingly slowly. One ring. Two rings. A click. "Hello?" Jongin's sleepy voice crackles through the cell.

"Jongin."

"Yeah, Sehun?" What he wants to say is, What the do you want in the middle of the in' night? Of course, considering Sehun's position in relation to his family, he really can't say such a thing. He fights the urge to ignore his friend and just go back to bed.

"How do I get rid of him?" 

After a pause, he hears Jongin ask, "Who?"

"Tao. I'm dry of ideas, Jongin. How do I get rid of him?"

Instead of the comforting support and encouragement he feels he needs, he hears his friend laugh at the other end of the line. "So I was right."

"What are you talking about now?"

"You're already warming up to him." He can picture it now: Jongin leaning on his elbow, smirking as he holds the phone to his ear. 

"You're a ing idiot." 

"You don't really want him to leave, Sehun."

"Shut up."

"You're just not used to someone clinging to you all the time like that."

"Shut up."

"In truth, you want him to stay, but you just don't know you feel that way."

"I said, shut up."

"And I'm your wake up call." There's a loud click, and Sehun knows Jongin had hung up on him.

He's a little , that's what he is, Sehun thinks to himself as he runs his fingers through his hair incessantly. The stress was piling up and in a split decision, he punches his pillow as hard as he can. There's a suppressed noise and Sehun shakes his fingers loose in satisfaction. But the feeling is still there.

He spends a restless night at the hospital, and when Tao visits him the next morning, he welcomes him with a smile. His mind is made up.

_{A/N Hi everyone! I hope this chapter wasn't too overwhelming :/ I ended up writing a lot more plot than I thought I would. Please tell me if there are any typos! I'm already getting votes and so many subscribers and this is really amazing. Thank you so much, everyone! ^u^ Please comment, vote and subscribe if you like the story! It would really encourage me to update faster!}