One breath at a time.

In. Out.

In sync with the pounding of their feet on hard concrete.

In. Out.

Shallow breaths, shallow steps.

He should be thinking about why. Reasons. He should be thinking about the hand holding his, and who it belongs to. He should be thinking if this is the right thing to do.

But he can only think about their steps and the oxygen filling his lungs like water and the red sneakers on his feet.

And the fear. And the way the world is spinning in circles around his head.

There is much to think on.

"I like these," he points to the pair he's wearing, admiring the way it shines and glistens the way new shoes do.

Tao sits on one of the chairs nearby, picking the shoe box off the shelf. "They're fine. I don't see the reason for liking them so much, I'm sorry to say."

Sehun stands and paces around in front of the mirror, happy with the way the high tops go with his jeans, how casual they look. "You don't like them?" He looks up behind his hair to peer into Tao's eyes.

His bodyguard looks around the store at the dozens of shelves, the hundreds of shoes. There were many other options, to say the least. Pairs that could cost more than everybody on him at the moment. Pairs that had much more originality than these red high tops.

"It's not that. I suppose I'm curious as to why that pair out of all of these." He waves a hand to gesture at the rest of the store. He watches as Sehun unties the laces and pulls them off to place them back in their box home. Lacing his fingers together, he catches Sehun's eye, the other boy hugging his knees on the floor. "Mind telling me why?"

"They remind me of the first pair of sneakers I ever had as a kid," Sehun says softly, thinking back to those years. His mother and father at home, Jongin ready to play with a dirty streak on his face from soccer with the kids down the street.

Sehun smiles to himself.

With that, Tao closes the box in his hands and stands. Sehun follows. He walks to the cashier and drops the box on the counter. He turns to Sehun.

"Let's buy them then."

Streetlamps flash by them as they run, breaking the darkness into pieces. Tao's tight grip on Sehun's hand hurts a little, but he feels it's really no time to be complaining about a minor ache.

His chest stings with every intake of air. In the rush to leave, he'd left his medicine box on the dresser in his room. It is too late to go back.

A skip in his heart beat.

Why are they even running?

Fear breaks a person down to their most vulnerable and shattered places. He is a child again, the pressure of the darkness around him squeezing tears out of his eyes. He has no breath left to tell Tao to stop, please stop, just for one second.

He stumbles, but continues.

Through the pain.

Step. Step. Step.

In. Out.

"Are you okay?" The teacher screams at him. His shoulders are shaken violently, rough hands trying to pry at his consciousness.

The floor is cold beneath Sehun, the dust getting in his eyes. It hurts, he wants to say. It hurts a lot. I can't do it. He feels hot, and dizzy. His head smarts. Everything is a blur of pain.

"Someone help him to the nurse!" His gym teacher yells at the other students. "He can't walk by himself. Quickly!"

It's quiet, Sehun thinks. It has to be. There's no one there who even wants to touch him.

"I'll go." Someone rushes up and small hands lift Sehun's thin body from the ground. His arm is draped across this boy's shoulders. He leans heavily to stand. Weak.

He opens his eyes to peek at his classmate. Eyes bright, biting his lip, there's a determined Jongin ready to be Sehun's heroic best friend.

They're out the door and Jongin quickens his pace.

"It'll be alright," he says. "You'll be fine. It was just a couple laps around the field. That's nothing. Nothing. I'll get you to the nurse, alright? She has your inhaler, right? It's okay. You're fine."

Sehun nods. He knows he's saying it more for himself than for Sehun.

"Tao," Sehun gasps out the name, only to cough out a fit of chokes and sputters.

Tao slows the tiniest bit, throwing a concerned expression over his shoulders. ", Sehun." He comes to a full stop, and Sehun almost collapses.

He rests his hands on bent knees, wheezing and gulping up air.

"Please," he begs, tears dripping down his cheeks one by one. "Please." He can't finish the sentence.

Tao holds him tightly and gives him a kiss. Everything he does, he does with an anticipation. A haste.

Sehun suddenly finds himself hoisted up into Tao's arms, one hand under his knees, and one on his back. His head drops against Tao's chest and his body bounces lightly as Tao runs with an ease.

The ease comes with the apprehension.

Sehun opens his eyes a minute later, still bobbing to the rhythm of Tao's gait. Next to him has materialized a pair of eyes.

They look at him with such disdain.

Such hatred.

Such disappointment.

Sehun flinches in Tao's arms.

They pass another streetlight.

"Tell him to stop looking at me," Sehun mutters under his breath in Tao's arms.

Tao glances at him, worry writing lines across his face. He looks around them. There's no one there.

Hallucinating?

"Sehun?" He says, trying to wake the boy. "Are you okay?"

"Tao," Sehun's eyes open for the second time. "I can't...breathe."

Tao holds Sehun tighter, clutching the frail body to his own, trying to transfer heat, health to him.

"It's okay now," He slows to a walk, doing a double-take behind them to check for followers. Or, more specifically, the potential follower. "You're fine."

Tao sits him down on his lap behind the shadow of a tree. He kisses Sehun's lips lightly. He's cold, but that's no surprise. "Breathe," he tells him. "Breathe."

Sehun takes a breath. Is his consciousness leaving him? He takes another one. In time to Tao's voice.

"In," Tao tells him. "Out. In. Out. Breathe."

Breathe.

Sehun's eyes open and close. Visions pass by him with each cycle. Darkness, Tao's face, darkness. And then...himself?

A younger version of himself, holding hands with his mother on one side, his father on the other.

"Mama? Papa?" Child-Sehun says, looking up at the young woman, a brilliant smile shining on her face, and the handsome man giving him a warm look.

"Yes, Hunnie?" His mother gives his hand a squeeze.

"What is it?" His father says, as both his parents lift his little body up and swing him back and forth once before setting him back on his feet.

"We'll be the happiest family, right? My teacher says when we grow up, we have to take care of our family, and- and- and- when I grow up, I'll earn a lot of money and take care of you two too and everyone'll be happy," Child-Sehun stares at some spot on the ground, his eyes transfixed on this invisible point of interest. He gives his parents a toothy smile.

His mother and father look at each other, a sort of message passing between them.

"Of course, son," his father replies.

"Definitely," his mother nods at him.

The illusion disappears before his eyes and the present Sehun lets out a sigh.

What a joke.

The manor is laughing at him as Yi Fan makes it to the front door right when it closes behind his prey. Taunting corridors and mocking whispers from the walls. Snickering shadows tearing at his defeat. He slams on the door with his closed fists, frustration leaking out in roars and more banging. He contemplates running after them, grabbing onto them and squeezing the life out of their necks.

It's so tempting.

Yes, so tempting indeed that he reaches for the doorknob. But his hand freezes midair.

No. It would leave too much suspicion. The parents, the servants, the deliverers. There's too many factors of his failure.

He takes a deep breath, straightens his back, smiles. Calmly pulls his phone out.

Chasing after mere rabbits in the city?

He has people for this.

Tao's head is working overtime. Keep going or let Sehun rest? He could always keep carrying him. But even carrying a grown boy like Sehun tires him out. Where to go?

"Tao?" Sehun coughs a couple times. "Where are we going?" As if he can read his mind. Sehun's voice sounds weaker and weaker with every syllable.

"Don't sleep, Sehun, don't sleep," Tao mumbles, avoiding the question. He doesn't know yet, he doesn't know.

Where? Why? Who to trust?

Family? Sehun's friends? No, too easily trackable.

His friends? What friends? Well....

There had been one.

But how to find him?

Sehun's phone is still in his back pocket. "Sorry, Sehun, I'm going to use this just once." What had been that code to block your number from showing up on people's phones? He types the number by memory, having engraved it into his head at such a young age.

A just-in-case you ever need me kind of thing, that boy had told him. What if he had changed his number?

There are too many questions floating around in his mind, bumping into each other and demanding space for each to be answered.

His finger hesitates on the green button, hovering over it for a second. But then a loud noise behind him makes him jump. His head turns to inspect -- a cat with a suspiciously fallen trash can behind it is crossing the street.

He presses the button.

One ring. Two. Three.

A click.

"Hello?" The soothing, but groggy voice is laced with such familiarity.

"Hey. Yi Xing, it's me."

A chuckle. "Well, well, well! Isn't this the degrading voice of Mr. Top-of-his-class, Huang Zi Tao?"

Tao shakes his head. "Yeah, sure, whatever. Look, I need your help."

"I never thought I'd hear that."

"I'm serious. Please--"

"Especially when you beat down those four guys in hand-to-hand combat."

"Yi Xing, stop--"

"Poor Li stayed in the hospital for weeks after that."

"I need--"

"Blood soaked fingers, staring up at us like that. Damn, you were a scary ki--"

"Yi Xing!" He stops his old friend's rambling before he could go into gory detail. "I need a place to stay. For a night." Tao's eyes flit from left to right, regularly checking for signs of danger. He needs to hurry.

"Any baggage?"

Well, there's a boy with me. "Maybe."

Quick talk. Rushed chatter.

"What's that mean?" He hears Yi Xing tap his fingers on wood in the background.

"Just tell me if it's okay."

"Sure, yeah, all right."

"Where are you these days?"

"Can't say. Why don't I find you?"

Tao tells him their location, dropping to a whisper. He pictures Yi Xing nodding as he hears him say, "Mhm got it. I'll be there in a bit."

The line goes dead. He erases the call from the call history and slides the phone back into his pocket. In his arms, Sehun seems to be doing better already, but his recovery from the attack is slower than ever without his medicine.

"Sehun?" He touches their foreheads together.

"I'm...okay." Sehun's eyes flutter open. Shallow air, hollow voice.

He shifts and curls into Tao's hold, aiming to take in his scent, a mix of sweat, soap, and constant fear.

"Where are we going now?" He sounds strained. Sehun does not welcome the confusion flooding his system. "What's happening?"

A quick kiss on the lips.

"It's okay. It's fine. We're okay."

Sehun nods, grasping at Tao's shirt. A moment of deja vu.

He repeats the words to himself.

It's okay. It's okay.

We're okay.

The cold is like a blanket to him wrapping its way around Sehun, binding him close. All the same, killing him and yet helping him, it beckons the sleep in him. He wants to drift off in its chilly arms, let go of this reality. After all, it is the middle of the night. He needs his rest.

Voices tell him no.

He is hoisted up again, the rhythm back on Tao's feet. Tao's fingers on his body tighten their grip and Sehun is tilted inward towards his chest.

A car door slams in front of them. The sound of expensive shoes tapping against the ground. It stops before Tao. Sehun ultimately makes the decision to keep his eyes closed. He gives Tao's shirt the lightest tug to let him know he's still awake.

"You didn't mention the boy," someone says. The expensive-shoes man, Sehun's mind registers.

"Sorry. I'm desperate," Tao responds. "Is it still okay? Please tell me it's still okay."

"You all right with sleeping on the couch?"

"I'd sleep on the floor if I had to."

"Then get in," replies the voice, and a car door is opened. Sehun feels Tao move forward with a hesitation in his gait. After a second and a slight struggle, his head is on Tao's lap, the rest of him sprawled on the backseat of the vehicle.

"Oh, I see how it is," the mystery person sounds smug. "Don't get any funny ideas, you two. This car is my equivalent of...well. You would know, wouldn't you."

Tao lets out a disgusted sound and doesn't answer back. He gives Sehun's chin a tap. Sehun's eyes fly open.

How are you? Tao mouths to him.

I'm fine. Where are we going? Sehun mouths back.

A friend's house. Tao "tells" him, but his mouth is pressed in a hard line afterward.

Sehun nods a tiny nod. As long as they're safe, then it shouldn't matter. His own curiosities can be repressed until later.

"So what's wrong with him? Asleep?" Startled, Sehun closes his eyes again at the sound of the man's voice.

"Yeah," Tao says, careful not to mention Sehun's medical state. "What do you expect at this time of night?"

"I don't know. Kids these days."

"Yi Xing, please. You're barely older than me."

This Yi Xing person clicks his tongue. "He doesn't drool, right? I'll make you pay to clean that."

"He doesn't and when have you ever been so attached to anything but yourself?"

"Such affection. I thought we were best friends." The car takes a sharp right. Tao holds Sehun close to keep him from falling. "You know," Yi Xing continues, "back in the day."

"Let's talk about that later," Tao says through slightly gritted teeth. "I...don't want to wake him up."

"Oh sure," Yi Xing says in a mocking tone. "Don't want to wake the boy, he says. You just don't want to talk about the dark ages, eh?"

"Stop." Tao's teeth grind against each other. "Later."

Yi Xing lets out a "ha!' but doesn't say a word. Through his composed facade, he pauses before changing the subject, not wanting Tao to see that he's still jittery whenever the former gets overly severe with his attitude. A tendency then, a habit now. Those eyes never failed to get through to him, even through a reflection in the rearview mirror.

They finish the ride in silence.

Yi Xing pulls up into a rather short driveway next to what is presumably his home. A comfortable looking flat, trimmed yard, with lights out throughout making the windows look like eyes staring out onto the street. Sehun peeks out the car window, the night sky painted on the top half, obscuring his view of the place. He hears Tao say, "Not bad." Tao taps him to wake him, fingers thrumming on Sehun's chest in an almost too playful way for the tension they're both feeling. Tao picks Sehun up in his arms, indicating for him to remain to continue his act.

"Damn, that kid's completely knocked out, isn't he?"

"Long day," Tao replies casually, letting no signs of the lie into his voice.

It becomes apparent soon enough that the outside of the hosue is a lot neater than the inside. A turn of the key reveals jackets thrown on chair backs, dirty dishes from Yi Xing's last meal stacked high in the kitchen sink, documents and various papers and notebooks strewn across the coffee table in the living room. It's a beautiful mess.

Yi Xing rubs the nape of his neck, his face contorting a little with one eye closed and his front teeth biting down on his lip. "Sorry about the mess," he apologizes. "Wasn't expecting visitors. You know. Ever."

"It's okay," Tao dismisses. He sets Sehun down on his feet, the latter rubbing his eyes groggily. "Sehun. Up?"

"Yeah," He blinks a couple times.

"Sehun, is it?" Yi Xing puts out a hand. "Zhang Yi Xing, that's me. Nice to meet you."

Sehun takes it and shakes it twice firmly. "You too. Sorry for the trouble." He looks down, awkward at meeting someone in this condition. He runs his fingers through his hair a couple times.

Yi Xing walks over and pats Tao roughly on the shoulder. "It's all good. I guess I owe this kid some."

Tao swats his arm away and rolls his eyes. "Yi Xing, do you have a guest bedroom?"

Yi Xing tilts his head towards the hallway. "Second door to your left. Bathroom's across. Call me if you need me." Arms crossed, relaxed beyond words, he heads to the kitchen.

Tao waits a few seconds before placing a hand on the small of Sehun's back and pushing him towards the guest bedroom. "Come on, Sehun. I think you need some real sleep now."

"Is it all right to be here?" Sehun gives him a questionable expression. It doesn't seem right to sleep in the home of a man he only just met. In fact, that's quite the opposite of what he wants.

"It's fine. Don't worry about him."

"Who is he?"

"An old friend. We, uh. We went to school together." Tao closes the door behind them. He checks the door for a lock and nods in approval. "Here." He ushers Sehun into bed. Despite trying to push him onto his back and force him to sleep, Sehun holds still, sitting on the edge of the mattress.

"How long are we going to be here? Why? Isn't there anywhere else?" Worry eats away at his conscious. He'd never been this nervous for anything before.

It's time, Tao knows. But he can't. He doesn't have it in him. It's the words he'd kept in his throat this whole time, unable to spit out. Delicately, he caresses Sehun's face with his hands, pressing their foreheads together.

"I'm sorry," he whispers, "I'm so sorry. Just for a while. A day. No more."

Sehun's hands snake around Tao's neck, pulling until their lips meet for a second.

A moment frozen in time. He lets it out.

"Tao," Sehun breathes, "I know. Everything." He stops himself from gulping.

"What do you mean?" Tao's eyes search him, incredulous, surprised. A horrible stop in his heart beat. This can't be. "Are you saying..."

"Please," Sehun kisses him again. "Please don't...kill...me."

Tao kisses him back, one harsh press. He stands, rubbing Sehun's cheek with his thumb once over.

"I promise I'll do anything but." Tao heads to the door, a sort of guilt eating away at him. Sehun knew. But for how long had he? The thoughts crash against his skull in waves, silencing out all other sounds.

"I trust you," he hears Sehun say as his hand touches the doorframe. Tao looks back. Sehun seems as though he has more to say, but he closes his mouth before he can. 

"I won't fail you," is all Tao can think of to reply. He gives Sehun a weak smile. "Lock your door, okay? I'll knock in a bit." He leaves before Sehun can respond. 

He finds Yi Xing sitting at his kitchen counter, a mug in his hand. He takes a sip before glancing over at Tao. 

"Tough day?" Yi Xing beckons him over. Tao takes a seat, nodding. "Drink?"

"I don't drink." Tao winces at the memory.

"Coffee then?"

A second of nostalgia. "Sure."

Yi Xing pours him a cup with the grace of someone who'd practiced precise motions since the day he was born. He slides the cup over to the countertop to Tao.

"Thanks," Tao takes it and sips despite the growing warmth in his fingertips. It scalds his tongue, but he doesn't mind.

"So," Yi Xing lifts a corner of his mouth at him, showing off his crescent dimple. "Tell me."

And Tao does.

A/N Hi everyone! OTL i'm not afraid to admit that this chapter is a mess... It took me a while to write and i have a lot of school stuff going on so i'm trying my best to keep up with updates... Trust me when I say I'll read this over a million times and fix any and all mistakes I find! 

Thank you for reading and subscribing and voting! ! it means a lot <3 and if you haven't, then why not? :3 It would really encourage me to write faster and ever better >w< Thank you again <3