Mad Clown puts his phone back into his pocket. Was she truly concerned? Or was she just being polite, since she did forget to return his coat. Well, it’s his fault too. He was too mesmerized by her beauty that he forgot that he was cold, and that it was his coat around her shoulders.

Mad Clown didn’t like the fact that Soyou went out with Sunggyu, yet Sunggyu let her leave alone…. Especially at that time of night. To Mad C, it’s only right that a man sends a lady home… especially at night… be it a date or not. In his younger days, when the group of friends went out, and there was a girl in the group, at least one of them, if not the few of them, would make sure the girl is home safely before making their own way home. It is only right, he feels.

Mad Clown remembers the way Soyou laughed in the café. He feels like a stalker, watching from the outside. He wonders if he can even make Soyou laugh like that. Nah… he thought to himself. He has allowed himself to be wallowed in loneliness too long to know how to crack a joke. He forgot when was the last time he laughed. Must be the time where Soul Company had dinner together before the company dissolved. Good times… he thought to himself.

Mad Clown was used to a life of loneliness. Being an introvert, it was difficult for him to open up to people, especially strangers. The friends he has now, are the friends he knows will stick with him through thick and thin. But those friends, now, are busy with their own lives. Their own girlfriends, and wives and families…. And in the end, he’s the one still alone. But he knows, if he ever needs them, they will be there for him... but he doesn’t want to be a bother.

He chose the path of Music. He knew that it might be a lonely one, but he persisted. He was unsure if Music caused him to be lonely, or Music saved him for being lonely, alone. At least, with his music, he can share the loneliness with his listeners, his fans… or what he will call his friends whom he never knew.

Mad Clown remembered the time he spent with his ex. Even though she cheated on him and made him feel like trash, he had to admit that there were good times. Times where they will stay in each others’ arms as they watch the sun go down. Times where they will just stare into each other's eyes without saying a word. Times where they will laugh at their own jokes only they will understand. But he guesses that those times are not enough. He can never give her what she wanted. Mad clown was a simple man. He was too easily contented, it seems.

Mad Clown thought about the reasons why he decided to join starhip x. He wanted something more than the underground hip hop scene. No, he didn’t forget his roots…he still performs underground when he has the chance. And no he didn’t crave for fame. He just wanted to see how far he will go, and how far his music will bring him… and whether, there is hope for him to get out of his solitude. He needs to be out there, to be criticized. He needs to escape his comfort zone. It’s a bit worrying for him, that solitude is comforting. He likes to be alone, but he doesn’t like feeling lonely.