You know the drill:

http://youtubeonrepeat.com/watch/?v=GtynUY2kw-8

"You have to talk to me sometime." I said standing behind Jae as she fried her eggs and placed slices of ham into the pan. 

"Jae, didn't you want to paint the baby's room blue and dress him in the cute pajamas you saw in the mall?" I said trying to reason with her, she didn't answer. She continued to flip the eggs and add more ham to the pan. "Jae." I said in one last desperate attempt to change her mind. "You've been carrying this baby for six months, are you really just going to act like everything will be fine after you .. do that?" I couldn't say the cruel word. She flinched and her eyes flickered when they met mine. She acted as though she wasn't fazed by my words and scooped the eggs into a bowl and grabbed a metal spoon from a drawer. She walked into the dining room and pulled out the black chair nearest to her. I sighed and walked out of the dining room.

"I'll go to the laundry then, call me if you need anything." I said staring at the back of her head as she continued to silently gobble down her food.I took the loaded laundry basket sitting by the wall and walked down the hall to the laundry room. 

She has been like this ever since we left the doctors office, a week ago. She never said a word, never complained that I spoke too much. That's what really worried me. Of the twelve years I've known her, she has never went more than an hour without yabbering on about something. Her silence wasn't refreshing as one would think, it was eerie. 

I stuffed the light colored clothes into the washer and added soap to the clothes and closed the washer door. I heard Jae jingling her keys, she must be on her way to the .. abortion office. I hadn't given up hope that she would stop before it was too late; but if it was what she wanted, all I could do was stand by her side and help her through it. 

"Let me drive you." I said walking into her bedroom to find her staring into the full length mirror. She was looking at her stomach from the side view. I knew she was thinking about her nameless baby and feeling guilty. Without a word she walked out of the room and into the living room. She sat down on the couch and put on her black flats. She took her keys out of her purse and and struggled to get off the couch. Arching her back and using a hand to support the small of her back she pushed herself off the couch and headed toward the door. I took the keys in my hand and rested a hand on her back, "At least let me be there for you when it's all over." 

She didn't look at me, as we stood in a deadlock with our hands both on the keys. Her fingers loosely tangled around the keys, she was debating if she should let me go. I took it out of her hands and locked the door behind us. 

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The halls leading to the waiting room was white, white and eerie. Not a sound could be heard from within these long echoing halls. We entered a room with navy blue chairs lined up against the walls. Jaejin went straight to the receptionist and signed in as I took a seat furthest from the other patients. She took a seat beside me and surfed the web on her phone. This was the last time we would sit together like this, gathered here together for the baby, she treated this moment as if it was nothing. As if this one decision wouldn't change her life. 

"Jaejin Kim." A woman said from behind the receptionist counter. Jaejin got up with her purse, and did not turn around to say anything to me. She followed the woman down a long hall and then whatever was going on behind those doors, only Jae and the woman would know. 

I was left alone with the receptionist and a woman with a young girl who looked like she had completely lost her soul. I looked around at the unfriendly environment.  The walls seemed to be pure white, the carpet and the chairs matched, no windows, it felt like a jail cell. 

My mind kept racing as I sat in silence staring at the door down the hall. I waited for it to open, but all I could hear was the sound of my heart pounding in my chest. I knew that after this operation Jae would be different, she would forever weep when she saw a baby. She could never have a baby without worrying about it having Huntington.  To make matters worse, as if aborting her baby wasn't bad enough, she now had to take medications to control her emotions, and she would start psychotherapy with doctor Jung next Friday.

I spoke to doctor Jung about Jae's condition and it seemed as though there was no light at the tunnel for this disease. Jae was in the early stages of her illness so her symptoms aren't noticeable yet, but she clearly had lots of trouble with her emotions. The stress from the abortion and the hormones were driving her nuts.

Jae was eventually going to become mentally and physically unable to function depending on how fast her illness progresses.  Doctor Jung warned me that the first physical symptoms were trembling and unable to control body movements and that eventually, she wouldn't be able to walk, talk eat, or think.  The only thing I could do was keep being positive and hope that will help her fight against the disease. 

"I can't do this." I said standing up and knocking over the magazines that were in my lap. "You shouldn't do this." I said to the young girl sitting across the room from me. She looked up for the first time in the hour that I've been sitting here, and in her eyes were tears with hope hidden underneath them. "And you shouldn't make her." I said pointing to her mother who looked at me in disbelief. I ran in past the receptionist desk and toward the door at the end of the hall. 

"Jae, you don't have to do this!"I shouted as the woman behind the reception desk pulled on my shirt. 

"Sir, please don't disturb others or I will have to kick you out." She said tugging on me with all her force. I breathed heavily calming down and walking back out into the waiting room and taking my seat in the jail cell. 

Everything will be fine. I'll give Jae the life she truly deserves. We can move away together and just start life over again. We will fight her illness and put it off for as long as we can, we will live the rest of our days in bliss. 

I looked at the clock that hung by the door, it was already almost an hour and a half. It should have been done already. I picked up a magazine and tried to focus on the words sprawled across the page but my eyes wouldn't focus. I felt hopeless sitting here, I couldn't save the baby, I'm not sure if I can save Jae. 

She walked out with her hands hanging lifelessly by her sides, her purse hanging off her fragile shoulder. Her eyes were rimmed with tears. She stared at the ground taking hasty steps, not looking up at me. I took her cold hands in mine and walked with her to the car. 

She didn't cry, she didn't speak. She only looked out the window. 

"Did it hurt?" I asked her, she didn't reply.

"It's okay, let's just take this as a life lesson." I said to her. 

"Shut up! You talk too much, you know that?" She said so suddenly that I swerved when I heard her speak. 

"I couldn't do it." She said sighing deeply " The baby loved me. He said his name is Hunter. Hunter is all I have left. " She said touching her stomach. I parked my car over on the side of the road and held her in my arms. 

"Thank god you kept him." I said reaching for her hand.  "Let me take care of you and Hunter, Jae." I said softly.

She looked back into my eyes and it was as though all those walls she has built around her heart had collapsed and the sky cleared around us. She nodded, allowing me to wipe her tears with my thumb. I leaned in slowly as I listened to the sound of her rapid breathing halt. She held her breath as I got closer to her. I placed a gentle hand on her neck and looked in her eyes to make sure it was okay. Her eyes still twinkled with tears, her dark brown eyes boring into mine. Telling me to kiss her. I leaned in and placed my lips gently on hers.