It was snowing. And there were lights everywhere and lots of decorations. It was that time of year again and someone was a little too excited. This was probably Joonmyun's least favorite time of the year. He had nothing against Christmas or anything, but he hated having to go back to the family home. Every year, the Kim family would gather at Joonmyun's grandmother's house and they would spend the 24th to the 26th together as a family. It was one of the very few times that the entire family got together to see each other. This was when all the kids brought their husbands, wives and children. Joonmyun had none of that. There was always an empty seat at the table that his significant other was supposed to fill and it never happened. Every year the family Christmas photo would be taken and that seat would be empty. This year would be no different. Joonmyun really didn’t want to go but he knew his parents would be angry if he didn't show up. It was better to show up alone, rather than not at all. He sighed as he put down his work. To make things more difficult,  he had to think of something to do with Lay. Kyungsoo and Jongin were going to the latter's hometown. Jongdae would be at the Kim household too. He didn't want to leave the doll alone but taking him along was not an option. Joonmyun's parents were still coming to terms with their son being gay and the fact that they may not have grandchildren. It would be awkward to just show up with Lay and say "Here's my boyfriend who isn't really my boyfriend and not even a real person." Nope, it's not worth even talking about. It would probably be best not to go. "Oppa!" The doll came into the apartment dressed as a reindeer unicorn. He had asked to be one when Jongin and Kyungsoo had taken him to the mall. Lay wanted to decorate and wrap gifts to give to everyone on Christmas. Joonmyun wasn't really excited about decorating, but Lay begged him and he eventually gave in. "Look what I bought!" The doll held up his bags to show Joonmyun. "I even bought you something too!"

Joonmyun walked out of his room to see what was going on out in the hallway. "What are you doing?"

"I bought you something oppa!"

"Yah!" Kyungsoo pulled the bag away from Lay "You're not supposed to show him until Christmas, silly."

Jongin shrugged his shoulders as he came into the apartment "Nothing with an early gift. Besides, Suho can always pretend to be surprised."

Lay shook his head "No! I want it to be a real surprise. Promise you won't look!"

Joonmyun smiled and patted the doll's head "I promise. You should go put your stuff away, okay?"

Lay nodded as he headed into the room to separate his gifts from the decorations. Kyungsoo raised an eyebrow "You're in an awfully good mood, patting his head like that."

Joonmyun sighed as he walked over to the counter and sat on one of the barstools "I'm really not. How am I supposed to tell Lay that we can't spend Christmas together?"

"What?!" Kyungsoo and Jongin shouted in unison.

"Shut up!" The brunette harshly whispered "Can you not?!"

"This is your first Christmas since you got him, and you're not going to spend it with him?" Kyungsoo crossed his arms "How are you going to just crush his heart like that?"

"Yeah," Jongin shook his head in shame "He's really looking forward to this."

"Wait, why can't you spend Christmas with him?"

"I have to go to the Kim family home. I go there every year." Joonmyun ran a hand through his hair "I can't not go."

"Take him with you."

"What?!"

"Take. Him. With. You." Kyungsoo practically glared at the brunette "That boy doesn't want anything more than to be with you. You have absolutely no excuse not to take him with you."

"Are you crazy? If I show up with him, my parents will throw a fit!" Joonmyun glared back "I can't just walk in with him and pretend that he’s a real person. He doesn't even have a heart!"

"That doesn't mean he doesn't have feelings!"

"What's going on? Why are you being so loud?" The topic of their conversation walked over to them with the decorations in hand.

"Nothing, Kyungsoo and Jongin were just leaving."

Kyungsoo was about to retaliate when Jongin tugged his sleeve and shook his head. He smiled at Lay "We have to head home and decorate our house too."

The doll pouted but he understood "Take pictures and we'll see whose is better."

Kyungsoo looked at Joonmyun one more time before patting Lay's shoulder "We'll see you later. I hope you have a good Christmas."

"Merry Christmas!" Lay cheered and waved as Jongin and Kyungsoo left. When they were gone, he turned to Joonmyun and smiled "Let's decorate and make everything pretty."

"Yeah," the older boy wasn't ready. Kyungsoo did have a point. Even though Lay technically didn't have a heart, there was a part of the doll that could feel and he didn't want to hurt that part. Joonmyun gave a fake smile "Yeah let's make this place look decent."

When they were done, the apartment was covered in red and white. There were two stockings hanging on the key rack, red and white blankets tossed over the back of the sofa, and a small two foot tree on the coffee table decorated with red and white ornaments. There was a wreath decorated with red and white ribbons on the front door and the bathroom door. There was even a garland that surrounded the entryway to the kitchen. By the time they were finished decorating, Lay was really tired, but he was happy with how festive the apartment looked. Joonmyun liked it too even if he wouldn't be around to enjoy it. He looked over at the doll who was leaning on his shoulder and kissed his head. He was starting to feel guilt settle in as he stared on at the doll. He knew it wouldn't be right to leave the boy on his own, especially when you're supposed to be around family. Not to mention that he had gotten attached to Lay lately. He enjoyed having the doll around and it was always kind of odd when he wasn’t. Joonmyun really wasn't sure of what he should do. He sighed as he stared at the doll again "Why do you do this to me?"

"Do what?" Lay looked up at him.

"Huh?!" Joonmyun jumped back a bit "I thought you were asleep!"

"It's hard to sleep when oppa is being so loud."

"What?" Joonmyun didn’t think he was being that loud. Actually, he hadn't been making any noise at all.

"Your heart," the doll pointed to the other boy's chest "It was beating really fast and loud. Is it broken?"

The brunette smiled and shook his head "No, I was just thinking about something. Come on, let's go to bed so we don't catch a cold."

"Ne," Lay hopped and ran to their bedroom. Joonmyun smiled and followed behind him, turning off the lights as he went.

After changing into their pajamas, the doll lied next to Joonmyun and snuggled up to him. "Joonie," he looked up at the older boy "Where did you get your heart?"

The human raised an eyebrow "What are you talking about silly? Everybody is born with a heart."

"Born?" Lay looked at his owner questioningly. "Born from what?"

"Your parents," Joonmyun stared at the other. For a robot, Lay didn't know very much about human life. Of course that was probably because he was a robot. "I came from my parents, like other people come from their parents and I was born with a heart like everyone else."

Lay stared at the brunette before putting a hand to his owner's heart and then on his chest where he thought his should be "Why don't I have one?"

Joonmyun bit his lip and thought carefully about how he should answer. He wasn't really sure what to say. To be honest, Lay was somewhat of a modern marvel. Technically Lay couldn't feel, but the doll did have emotions. He didn't cry when he was sad, but he definitely made sad facial expressions. He also didn't understand sarcasm and metaphors, so Lay usually took everything at face value, but he was good at reading other people's emotions. The doll was more than a robot, but arguably less than a person. He was like a soul caught in limbo that didn’t know where to go. Joonmyun thought it best to be honest "Technically, Lay you aren't human. You're a doll so you don't need a heart."

"But I want to hear the beat sound in me too," Lay looked down dejectedly. "I want to be a real person so I can go with you to the house..."

Joonmyun wondered what the boy was talking about before it hit him. Lay had heard him talking about not spending Christmas together. He looked at the doll and put a hand on his cheek "Lay, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that."

The doll buried his face in his owner's chest and sighed. "I just want to be human so I can do things with you," he whispered.

Joonmyun pressed his lips against the doll's hair "Being human isn't all it's cracked up to be." Having a heart wasn't all that great either. It meant being vulnerable to people that could hurt you. The brunette was sometimes  jealous of Lay. Sometimes he wished that they could switch bodies. He looked down at the doll who was oddly enough staring back at him "What is it?"

"Oppa, Santa will grant me one wish, right?"

Joonmyun almost laughed at Lay's innocence. It was quite amazing sometimes. Of course he knew the boy was being completely serious so he just nodded as he tried to hold in his laughter. Lay closed his eyes and pressed his hands together. I wish that I could be human like Joonmyun-oppa. The older boy watched his doll with a smile "What did you wish for?"

Lay shook his head "I can't tell you or it won't come true. But when it does, then I'll be just like you!"

Joonmyun wasn't sure what the doll had wished for but he had a hunch. Regardless, he pretended not to know and just patted the other boy's head "It's late. We have to get some sleep so we can get up early tomorrow."

"Why are we getting up early?"

"It's a surprise," Joonmyun kissed Lay's head again "Now go to sleep."

"Ne," the doll closed it's eyes and slipped into sleep mode.

Joonmyun wondered if Lay could dream and what he dreamt about. There were so many things that he could imagine going on in that doll's head. Well tonight was not the night to stay awake wondering. He had to be up early to pack an extra suitcase. Joonmyun had decided to take Lay with him. He would deal with his parents when he got there. For now, he wanted to make the doll happy. Joonmyun closed his eyes and pulled Lay closer. Yes, he just wanted to make his little doll happy.

A/N: *slowly crawls in and begs for forgiveness* orz I am SOOOOOOOO SORRY. Please forgive me. I've been going through a lot lately and I'm just starting to pull myself back together. I hope you all didn't think I was abandoning this story. NEVER! Sulay is still my otp. I apologize for making you all wait so long for this chapter. There's going to be a part 2 and spoiler alert: You'll all be witnesses to something special. I promise the wait for the next chapter won't be even remotely as long as it was for this. I also know that it's WAAAAYYYY past Christmas but I really wanted to write this so just play along, okay? I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Thank you for sticking with me and not unsuscribing! You don't know how much that means to me. T^T Saranghae~ Anyway subscribe, comment, etc. Until next chapter!  Oh and guess where I got the chapter name from! First right answer gets a special feature in the next chapter!

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