Chansung opened his eyes. He was a bit groggy, but surprisingly well rested. How long had he been asleep? An hour? A few hours? Days? He couldn't tell. His head was resting comfortably on Nichkhun's lap. Nichkhun was still sitting up, but he was fast asleep, his head drooping uncomfortably. Chansung was careful not to stir too much, he didn't want to wake him. He wished he could make him more comfortable though, Nichkhun's head bobbed up and down as he was drawn deeper into the claws of sleep. However, moving would probably mean waking him up, so Chansung was as still as he could possibly be.

Admiring Nichkhun's angelic sleeping face made Chansung well up with gratitude. It had been a close call. One step wrong and he would've been fish food by now. Although he preferred to think that he would've been turtle food. Not long ago he had seen a documentary about the most endangered turtles in the world. Among the list was the Southeast Asian Giant Soft Shelled turtle. He remembered it specifically because it was this huge peculiar looking flat creature that spent up to 95% of its life motionless. Chansung couldn't fathom such a life. Having to keep still for five minutes was a challenge for him, thinking about a whole lifetime of stillness made his skin itch and his lungs tighten. He could feel a profound respect for the turtle grow in his gut. Even though its species was disappearing from this world, its habitat constantly changing and being disturbed by the ruthlessness of mankind, it still prevailed without moving an inch, holding on to what was its. Chansung had vowed to learn from that turtle and he found himself renewing that vow as he watched the shifting shadows playing on Nichkhun's perfect little ear. Even though waiting was excruciating, he would learn to master patience like the turtle.

When he was lost at sea he had had a lot of time to think, isolated, surrounded by cold water in all directions. Missing his boys, he had realized just how lucky he was to have them in his life. They were kind souls that filled his life with happiness and joy. He had once read a book about the secrets of success, where it was emphasized that only you could be the master of your own success. Chansung didn't agree. His success wasn't his alone, it was the result of great teamwork, of blood shed together in brotherhood. 2PM was his family and he would rather abandon success than to ever have to abandon them. And the way he saw it, the reason for their success was that they combined not only their strengths, but their weaknesses. The harmony between using their strengths and working on their weaknesses made them stronger both as a whole and as individuals.

More than 2PM, he had thought about Nichkhun. Sweet Nichkhun. Confusing Nichkhun. Chansung often got tired trying to decipher the little moments that sometimes happened between them. It was obvious Nichkhun liked him, they all liked each other, that wasn't a question, that was a fact. However, how much and in what way was what Chansung often asked himself. Sometimes it was like Nichkhun only saw him as a babo younger brother, playing lovingly with him, letting him have whatever his heart desired. Only, Nichkhun didn't know the one true desire of his heart. Other times the atmosphere would get charged around them, feeling as if the air was pushing them together. Every touch was electrified and Chansung had to push the breaks down hard with all his might in order not to devour Nichkhun on the spot.

Normally when Chansung wanted something, he did his best to go out and get it. He put his pride in being a straightforward and honest person. He didn't play games with people. His needs were simple, food, and friendship and he was happy. But Nichkhun complicated things. Lately, the food didn't taste as good if it wasn't served with a side of Nichkhun, with strangers was no longer fulfilling and a simple friendship with Nichkhun was frustrating, to say the least. If it were any other person, Chansung would have solved it with the direct approach, confronting him and either living happily ever after or having his heart broken. Both options were preferable to the status quo. It didn't really bother him that he was falling for a man. Even though he was raised in a society that condemned homoual relationships, he himself believed that love didn't judge by gender. You fell in love with the person living inside of someone, it didn't matter what was on the outside. Falling in love was like finding a sea shell lying on a beach, basking in the sun. First you were attracted to the intricate beauty of the shell itself, blinded by the glittering light reflecting on its surface, but later you would find out that the real treasure was hidden inside.

What did bother him was that he was falling for a 2PM member. If something went wrong, it could ruin everything. Not only between him and Nichkhun, but between all the members. Not to mention what would happen to them if news of their relationship were to leak out, creating the biggest Kpop scandal of all time. All their lives would be ruined along with everything they had strived for since they were in their teens. Chansung could live with it, if it were only him and Nichkhun that would take the fall, since then they could at least soften the fall with their blossoming love, finding happiness within the unhappiness. But they were all in this together, for better or for worse their six lives were bound together forever. Chansung cherished his fellow members so he could never do that to them. Therefore he kept his peace, enduring.

There was of course always the chance that Nichkhun didn't reciprocate his feelings. He was a skilled lady killer and proud of it. There was nothing that clearly indicated he would give all that up to be with the clumsy maknae. Why would he? Chansung didn't doubt he would be able to make him happy, he knew him inside out, he knew what made him tick and was prepared to do what it took to get the job done. He was as well acquainted with his flaws as he was with his qualities. Granted, Nichkhun didn't really have that many flaws, being the amazing person that he was. But nobody is perfect. Finding true love wasn't about finding the perfect person, it was about finding the perfect person for you. A person who's flaws you could live with, and even grow to love. For Chansung, Nichkhun was that person. He was sure of it. He just wasn't as sure that he was that person for Nichkhun. And finding out was too much of a risk, so Chansung was stuck. Doomed to pine for Nichkhun for the rest of his life. It was hard waiting your entire life for something that was probably never going to happen, but as Chansung had experienced, it was way harder trying to give up on something you knew was everything that you had ever wanted, and more.

As Chansung had drifted in the darkness, he had held his favorite quote close to his heart, forcing himself to believe everything would be alright. And now it was. He was lying in Nichkhun's arms, surrounded by the noisy excitement of his fellow members.

“Life is like a camera. Just focus on what’s important, capture the good times, develop from the negatives, and if things don’t turn out – take another shot.” - Unknown