I was sitting at a desk alone in the study room, when I heard the door behind me creak open and somebody walked in, invading my peaceful retreat. There was an illuminated book open in front of me, but truthfully, I kept on being distracted, unable to concentrate as my mind kept on wandering. I’d been like this since he’d come. My mind kept on revolving around him, conflicting feelings making me more confused. I didn’t need to look to know it was him, only him with me in this room, and my heart thumped a bit harder in my chest. There was no relief.

I felt him lean behind me, peeking over my shoulder to check what I was doing and I felt intimidated, unconsciously holding my breath. Was he aware of how strong and overwhelming his presence was?

“This is beautiful”, he said as he carefully detailed the illumination that I was looking at. I sighed heavily and closed my eyes, trying to stop my vision from blurring.

It represented a man and a woman, both holding a golden bowl, while looking at each other in the eyes, so intently, it made me wonder what secret words were exchanged between them.

“Tristan and Isolde…” he breathed softly, and I turned my head to look at him as he turned around the desk to sit across from me.

His eyes suddenly locked with mine and I couldn’t help but want to never part from his gentle stare.

“What did your Majesty just say?” I asked, curiously as I didn’t understand the words that had rolled so softly on his tongue.

For the split of a moment, he seemed a little bit surprised that I complied to talk to him. But he was not the kind to let someone read his thoughts and his surprise vanished almost as subtly as it had come.

“The characters, on this illumination: their names are Tristan and Isolde.”

I looked at the painting again and smiled softly.

“What weird names”, I said to myself in my mother tongue.

He seemed to be trying to catch my eyes in his own again as he asked:

“Do you know their story?”

I frowned and lifted my head up, intrigued, and I pondered on how unfair it was that he always managed to mesmerize me, even when I was trying my best to not fall under his irresistible yet stern authority.

A soft smile slightly stretched his lips and he started, in a steady voice:

“Isolde was promised to a King she’d never met and her mother was afraid she’d be an unhappy wife. So she concocted this beverage. If two persons drink it, they’ll fall helplessly in love with each other for three years. She wanted Isold to drink it with her husband on their wedding night. Tristan was a knight. He was given the task to accompany Isolde to her future husband’s realm. They travelled for a long time and eventually, Tristan was so thirsty he was just too happy when he found what seemed to be water. He offered Isolde to drink some and drank after her. And they fell madly in love with each other.”

He stopped and I realised I was staring intently at him, as I was drinking his every words. He smiled a little bit sadly and his hand reached softly for mine, on top of the desk. I immediately pulled my hand away from his touch, feeling uneasy and his eyes seemed to be pleading me. He suddenly looked so sad.

“What happened?” I said softly, my voice barely audible as I was trying to resist him, when all I really wanted was to give into him.

He sighed and shifted in his chair. He tore his eyes from mine and seemed to stare in the empty as he started to speak again:

“Isolde married the King nevertheless. At night, she closed the curtains and lit out the lights and she substituted a maid to spend the night with the King while she eloped with Tristan.”

He paused and I almost thought he wouldn’t say more, as he seemed lost in his thoughts.

But he added after a few seconds, with a strange melancholy in his voice:

“The King was furious and looked for them everywhere. It took him three years to find them, sleeping in a cave that the sea had dug on the beach, along a cliff. He took Isolde back and banished Tristan from his Kingdom.”

“Wasn’t the filter meant to only last three years?” I couldn’t help but ask.

Hearing my voice seemed to bring his mind back as he looked at me again, a gentle smile on his lips:

“Indeed”, he breathed softly, “You’re right. But unfortunately for them both, to this forced love had succeeded a human, natural love. And love can’t be severed from its plagues that are jealousy and pain. Being away from each other was killing them softly.”

I drowned in his eyes and let my mind wander away. Is there a world, away from your beloved? It was childish but I couldn’t help but think we were pretty much like Tristan and Isolde.

“Tristan married a woman named Isolde, the White, who reminded him a lot of his beloved Isolde. But then during a war, there was a battle, and he got hurt and lost his sight. As he was about to die, he sent a letter to Isolde, telling her to come to him before he died. If she agreed, she had to come in a white veiled vessel. If she refused, she had to send a black-veiled vessel. Of course, she loved him so she travelled in a white vessel. But when the vessel came, he asked Isolde the White, to tell him the colour. She was consumed with jealousy, knowing her beloved husband loved someone else that she could never replace. So she told him the veils were black and it killed him. When Isolde accosted, she threw herself into the sea when she learnt she’d come too late. There was just no possible life without him.”

I closed my eyes and breathed in and out softly, before I opened them again, reluctantly letting the melancholy of the story linger in my mind.

“Sad, isn’t it?”

I looked at him again and lowered my gaze, staring at the tip of his fingers softly caressing mines. I let a long breath out. I was unable to get away from his touch. I’d missed him so much! I needed him. He sat up and leaned in, his face getting closer to mine. My heart skipped a beat. Here we were again. He’d make me bend again and I’d just give in before I’d lose myself and break once again. I couldn’t evade it anymore. I felt my strength leaving me and I closed my eyes one more time, resigned. I knew I’d falter now.

I felt his lips touch my forehead gently, as his hand caressed my cheek. I opened my eyes, surprised he didn’t go any further and was greeted by his sweet smile.

“I’ll wait for you, my love,” he whispered. “I’ll wait until you trust me. For now, I won’t demand more than you can give me.”

I was speechless. I didn’t expect him to say something like that. He didn’t even let me say anything, he was already gone, leaving me here, lost and confused…and frightened by the sudden joy I felt my heart being suddenly filled with, in spite of me.

Here it is at last!

I’m so tired I can’t do better for now.

I hope you’ll enjoy this chapter!^^