D&M 10
Dreams and Memories
_T.S
"Whoever gave the idea of working out today, i wanna plunge my tongue deep down his throat as a form of my heartwarming gratitude." Baekhyun chirps, his small eyes adorn with eyeliner were peering through his improvised telescope aka his slender fingers curled into imperfect circles, magnifying all his optic lenses to get a exclusive close up view of his boyfriend's crotch."Oh damn, I'm getting all again with that huge bulge." He purred, his excited hormones were giving the other three a hair-standing-ovation.
Joonmyeon gawk ghastly then coughs uncontrollably beside Baekhyun. Yixing who was sitting crossed legs with Joonmyeon, gave him calming pats.
Their original plan of having a healthy morning exercise at one of the capital city's sport complex was moved into another location. Chanyeol (who got dragged out of warm covers by his boyfriend to come along) suggested that they should just work out in his High School's field, adding flowery words saying he have access, his old School have a huge field that they could use and plus it was winter break for students. Chanyeol pressed the idea that they'll have their own privacy and space rather than at the crowded sport complex. Kris agreed, considering the thought that Joonmyeon would be safe in a less chaotic environment. Yixing and Jongdae agreed at the spot. Luhan didn't have to think as long as Xiumin will be coming. Since majority of them were okey with it, Joonmyeon said nothing and just abided.
The weather was naturally bleak in midwinter. The sky was murky with the gray shades of clouds covering the cheerless sun up in the morning heaven of December.
Again, Joonmyeoun felt ultimately ridiculous for tagging a lot of people out in that kind of weather. The climate itself was depressing and if he could only turn back time, he'll shut up and say nothing to Yixing about,"Hey, wanna go jog?".
The four of them spent the last thirty minutes jogging around the oval. (Joonmyeon was walking with Yixing who was thoughtful enough to accompany him however, Luhan and Baekhyun were running around, desiring to burn unwanted fats to maintain their lean figure) Kris, Chanyeol, Jongdae and Xiumin had their bonding moment at the indoor basketball court after their warm up ran around the field.
Joonmyeon, Luhan, Baekhyun and Yixing were resting on the rough green grass profusely sweating. Picking their individual bottles of water to slurp enough fluilds to hydrate themselves. They settled down, crossed-legged and loitering on the ground with cold waters and sandwiches in front of them. They were enthusiastically talking among themselves when the other boys came into view, skittering from the in door basketball court while chatting with each other.
Chanyeol was jumping turbulently in place. The lanky boy was grinning rambunctiously from ear to ear, clapping his hands together and occasionally slapping Kris's back who was also amusedly laughing back at Chanyeol. The two tall males instantly warmed up with each other the moment Baekhyun introduced his boyfriend to Kris and the others.
Chanyeol's gray shirt was rolled up revealing half of his milky torso. His decent bare abs fashioned with fresh love marks were laid out for free viewing. His mildly aroused manhood was a tiny bit prominent behind his cotton sweat pants that was mainly the caused of Baekhyun's epileptic attacks, eyes maliciously gulping all his boyfriend's glorious body view. When Chanyeol saw Baekhyun, he shot his boyfriend a playful gunshot with the whisking of his comical hands. Baekhyun, sitting not too far, clenches his chest just above his pumping heart in retaliation, as if a real bullet pierced itself right through his heart. He cackles like a high school girl who's been waiting on the bleachers for her boyfriend and his league of er players to walk by.
Luhan who was forced to witnessed it, was fighting the call of his stomach to throw up.
Kris was striding confidently along with Chanyeol. A soccer ball anchored in between his hand and hip. A hand waving, explaining something at Chanyeol who's attention was half on him and half on his lover.
Kris's upper clothe that gotten damp with perspiration was way too translucent for Joonmyeon's eyes sake. The paper thin clothing welded perfectly around Kris's body like it's his second skin. Joonmyeon could unavoidably visualize Kris's hard s through his shirt. His well defined front that Joonmyeon had already seen umpteenth of times every time Kris roams around his villa topless, is sinfully inviting. When Kris's gorgeous brown eyes caught his boyfriend staring, he sent him one of his enticing smirk. Joonmyeon gulped roughly, averting his eyes immediately.
Xiumin was walking behind, fanning his hands and yankee cap. His lips were pursed out all together as he puffs out mixed warm and cold mist. He ruffled his own hair that was moistened by sweats. His physical heat was oddly a little unbearable in the middle of December. He uncapped the bottle of water that Jongdae handed from behind and poured the sum of fluids on him, drenching his heated head whilst laughing with Jongdae when the latter playfully pushed the other forward, nearly landing his face on the muddy earth. Xiumin's nonchalant actions were unknowingly stirring someone's sleeping hormones to full arousal.
"Oh my ing," Luhan had his jaw resting on the grass. His constricted pupils were magnifying every pixel of Xiumin's figure. He fiddled with his mineral, swallowing its content with eyes trailing on Xiumin. Imagining his own lips wiping the salty sweats mixed with pure water that Xiumin was trying to dry, off his skin. The images made him moan on the spot, closing his thighs shut to hide his affected little me, not that he's ashamed or embarrassed.
The three of them realized that December had never been that humidly hot before.
Joonmyeon wondered where did Yixing disappeared to. The chinese male was just sitting beside him a moment ago. His wandering eyes searches along the field until he inwardly cursed himself for even bothering to look around. His inquisitive eyes found the said male sidling beside Jongdae.
Yixing was thoughtfully offering a drink to Jongdae. With a blue towel on hand, Yixing tried to tap the dry clothe on Jongdae's face that was glistening with sweat when the latter shot him a childlike head shake. Fingers on the bottom of his shirt, it was now Joonmyeon's precious screen-time to be stunned. Mouth agape in bewilderment when Jongdae unabashedly undresses his white v-neck shirt, casually pulling it off him and hanging his discarded shirt on his right shoulder, exposing his upper body. Testing Joonmyeon's intact sanity.
The twenty years old Jongdae that Joonmyeon last remembered had a lean body. He was a horrible eater. He can eat a table full of food and his body still remained unchanging. His metabolism was way vast that he enjoys any sort of food trip without fretting over his weight. Presently, Jongdae wasn't bulky. His body mass have improved. His biceps were notable as he swings and flexes his arms. His babyish tummy was now looking toned and definitely made Joonmyeon's mouth water, even bled with unwanted urges. Jongdae's waist band was temptingly flouncing out that Joonmyeon had to drag his eyes towards north to avoid focusing on something sinful at the south border of his self-destruction.
His unashamed eyes traces the expanse of Jongdae's unflawed torso. Those clavicles that conspicuously looked overly alluring gives Joonmyeon images of the young him who would eagerly press his insatiate lips starting from those obvious skin to some private spots, hands wandering up and down exploring every sensitive area he was yet to unravel. The memory of feeling Jongdae's natural warm skin against Joonmyeon's that unfailingly sets his entire body burning with passion and love starts to sweat him. Those dark moles that he adored to nibble till it bruises, Jongdae's bobbing Adams apple and lastly, those bowed lips that moves gracefully as words sneaks out.
Joonmyeon's mouth was manically drying up, his skin feels warm. His tongue had the audacity to sweep along his dehydrated plump lips, eyes stubbornly refuses to scare away from Jongdae's untainted skin. His lungs were signaling him a fair warming that if he'll continue to ogle, his asthma will most likely make a dramatic occurrence at any given moment.
He needs to stop delving into those memories and to that body.
Joonmyeon was relieved Kris's deep laughing voice resonated around the clearing, shattering his trance of thoughts and thwarted the mental images of his passionate nights with Jongdae six years ago.
"Babe!" Kris shouted, succeeded on stealing half of Joonmyeon's attention. He gave him a gaily wave, returning the smile Kris had for him before Chanyeol nudges Kris to talk about soccer.
Joonmyeon's smile wavered the second Kris's attention shifted to someone else. He let out a subdued sigh, dejectedly looking down on his legs, bringing them closer to his chest to bury his forehead atop his flexed knees. He kept his eyes from staring back at Jongdae who was loudly laughing from somewhere.
He just wanted the entire day to end so he can take solace under his warm covers. He's been trying to avoid Jongdae, even Yixing when he feels that the couple is near. He didn't want to see them together like the last time and then what? cry like a fool after? Six years, it's six years. He still needs time to adjust to the s thrown at him. Everything's distressing.
Another sighed, he tilted his head slightly when he felt a blunt nudge on his side. He tiredly stared at Baekhyun who was, based from his funny expressions, asking him to look and listen to Luhan who's clinically drooling beside his brunette friend. He didn't have to ask why. One look at Luhan's eyes flaming with lust, the chinese male most certainly deflowering Xiumin inside his head.
"Xiumin is so cute."
"Xiumin's smirk is hot."
"Xiumin's eyes, those almond shape eyes, I wanna see myself in them everyday specially when i'll finally have him below me ."
"Xiumin's voice, i wander how his calm and soft voice sounds when I'm pounding in him.. "
"Xiumin.. Xiumin is-"
".. is terrified and scared of you. Every time he sees you, his eyes engorges. Like he's seeing him own murderer. I pity the guy." Baekhyun completed Luhan's sentence, nodding and grinning his own opinions.
Luhan's heart shaped eyes sharpen as he glared at Baekhyun indignantly. The brunette male ignored the latter's threatening eyes and entertains his own with Chanyeol's view.
"He's not scared of me! He's attracted to me I'm sure of it." Luhan refuted, confident with the words he just spoke. Baekhyun cynically laughs back at Luhan, finger tapping on Joonmyeon's shoulder with mouth saying'What's this talking about?' Joonmyeon scoots, looking down on his wrist watch counting minutes, waiting for the two's impending argument to strike.
Baekhyun was about to squash Luhan's confidence (he ultimately feels complete with an upsurge of triumph whenever he's given the golden opportunity to see Luhan's abomination) when an idea pops inside his head. Evilly cheering, he prod Luhan's arm to call his attention.
"If what you said is true and Xiumin also feels some ual connection with you, go ahead and prove it to us," Baekhyun stated, eyes challenging Luhan.
"If you'll be able to give Xiumin a to be proud of then, I'll believe you." Baekhyun chewed his lower lip as he was waiting for Luhan's reaction. Knowing him, Luhan never backs down in any dare.
"Guys you-" Baekhyun's feminine and slender hand clamped itself on Joonmyeon's mouth, accidentally poking the crimson male's eyes that made him screech like an ant, when the Joonmyeon attempted to stop Baekhyun's ongoing schemes.
Luhan's eyes squinted suspiciously. He wasn't dumb not to know Baekhyun's lousy antics he grown to laugh at over the years, but Luhan loves dares specially when it comes to his interests. He raises a brow and leaned back, propping his arms and yawning.
"What's in it for me?" Luhan asked Baekhyun who frown at his query.
"I thought you were sure of Xiumin?" There was sarcasm hidden under Baekhyun's innocent smiles. Joonmyeon was pressing his fingertips on his pulsating temples for his own good.
"Okey then, if you can manage to stimulate a huge then, I'm gonna-"
"Don't even mention money Baekhyun. I have a high talent fee that practically speaking, you can't afford. The entire KBS knows i have bigger payrolls than you so please." Luhan waves his hand dismissively, interrupting Baekhyun. He was chortling at the latter's scrunch up face accompanied by a low pained groan. The truth always hurts.
Baekhyun rolled his eyes, humming as his mind tries to dig up something until after a second, he giggled with his own thought. "I'll give you a chance to make your guilty dream come true of sleeping with me just this once." He casually said .
Luhan's propped arms relaxes like a boiled noodle. His head was a breath away from brutally spluttering on the ground if he hadn't caught himself on time. A choked laugher came out of his throat, cold shiver ran down his muscles as the drive to wring Baekhyun's neck was too strong to deny."Who the told you I wanted to sleep with you?!" He was screaming at Baekhyun who retorted with a failed seducing smirk.
"Oh c'mon, are you going to deny it after all these years? You were crushing on me when we first met six years ago Luhan don't even cover it up it was pretty obvious. You were checking me out with your batting eyelashes."He accuses, tickling Luhan's side that the chinese male didn't found ticklish. At all.
" you." Luhan cursed in disgust.
Baekhyun snaps, index finger pointing at Luhan with over flowing enthusiasm."See ! see! You do want me!" He spat, a smug on his face and brows twitching teasingly at the latter who was eyeing him with resentment."Don't worry, I won't tell Yeol you're dying to have a taste of me in bed." Baekhyun whispered. Luhan turns green.
Joonmyeon incredulously trembled as he s the pocket of his bag and s for his emergency device,"I think I need an inhaler." He said, voice faltering, at the peak of having a panic attack. He intuitively shakes his inhaler and brought his mouth into it, fighting the urge to bury Baekhyun on the ground.
"I have a high class taste." Luhan scooted a yard away from Baekhyun, nares flaring.
Baekhyun clapped his hands, stumbling like an obese male."Yeah, if you call Xiumin who feared you the most is your own brand of tastes then su-" Luhan was in a blink of an eye, on top of Baekhyun, hands clenching around the brunettes throat with a sadistic smile on his face.
Joonmyeon gasped as he watched Baekhyun's thrashing limbs and face shifting from warm red to blue. His airy voice squeaking like a bird being straggled. His eyes were producing pitiful tears."Luhan get off!!" He clenches Luhan's arm and yanks the chinese male off of the poor choking Baekhyun.
Baekhyun deliberately sat up, grasping for air as soon as Luhan was off him. He coughs painfully and piteously pouted at Joonmyeon with eyes clouded by tears. Joonmyeon scolded Luhan like a mother but the latter was only smirking, proud to be close to ending Baekhyun's life. Joonmyeon growled, he decided to sit his in between his friends before anyone dies.
Just when he thought the war between the two calmed down, Baekhyun shoved him down and jumps on Luhan, landing on the chinese's middle. But instead of beheading Luhan, he made use of his fingers and tickles Luhan to no end.
"Bae- hey get your of-" Luhan was already crying with forced happy tears as Baekhyun grinned broadly seeing Luhan squirming and rolling like a helpless hyena below him. Joonmyeon hopelessly clawed his face and given up on stopping the two.
"Are you going to do it or not?!" Baekhyun's epic fail of trying to sound threatening. Luhan was pushing the latter away because if he won't stop, he will pee in his pants and with Xiumin around, he'd rather jump off an on air plane than to be embarrassed in front of his future mate.
"Fine!"
Baekhyun rolled off guffawing like an idiot. Luhan wipes the happy tears under his eyes as he stood up. He brushes the dirt off his shirt and pants." Watch and learn from the prodigy." He smiled with eyes crinkling dangerously. He fixed his shirt and beetles off to approach his innocent prey.
Baekhyun rolled his eyes mockingly."Sure." When Luhan was far from them, he pulled out his phone and prepared a video shot."This is going to be epically fun." He sniggers, grinning while prodding Joonmyeon to agree with him, which the latter only growls in annoyance.
"I'm going to have an asthma attack with you guys." Joonmyeon dryly mumbled.
The two of them watched their foxy friend Luhan swinging his hips from side to side, feet looks like floating off the grass or it's only Luhan's exaggerated way of looking like a little girl prancing around the neighborhood in a hurry to confess to her oppa before someone else does. Baekhyun dodges his head as he waits for the inevitable to take place, teeth all exposed from grinning. Joonmyeon was left counting down Luhan's exhibition.
He could feel a sense of foreboding aura breezing around the field's chilly surroundings. Luckily, Xiumin instantaneously felt the imminent danger in the air when the shorter male saw Luhan approaching a horde of men talking about sports.
Them.
Baekhyun zoomed his camera and watch in anticipation. He jostled his knee against Joonmyeon telling him watch out, it's coming. Joonmyeon stares with lazy eyes, praying Xiumin knows how to fly his way out of Luhan because he was too worn out to stand up and put a lease around Luhan's neck.
Luhan tries his best to walk casually closer to Xiumin. But the shorter male who was aware of the trepidation the taller male brought with him, went hopping from one person to another, cloaking himself behind their backs. It made Luhan more elated and challenged. He begun running after the male, resulting for the two of them circling the rest of the males like they were little toddlers in daycare playing with each other. Good thing Chanyeol didn't join or else Baekhyun will have a major face palming.
Baekhyun was dying of laugher (His phone nearly got disposed inside his hole of a mouth) catching Luhan's irritated face. Xiumin was just nervously saving his life from an mental deer. The two stopped chasing around when Xiumin hid behind his friend Jongdae.
Luhan hates Jongdae. The two exchanges stares that made Joonmyeon hope Luhan won't cause a commotion. The Chinese male did promised he won't cause any trouble with Jongdae in it. Joonmyeon was bitting his lips praying Luhan keeps his promise.
Like a torn plucked off his heart, Joonmyeon breaths a foggy air out when Luhan leaves Jongdae and the shaking Baozi. He toddles back like a pissed off star player, fist gripping the sides of his jogging pants with a gloomy cloud striking with lightning follows behind.
"Aww, what happened in there? I thought you were a prodigy?" Baekhyun mocks, rubbing Luhan's failures off his scowling face. He laid flat on the ground when Luhan threw his green sketcher shoe at the brunette that he blessedly missed.
"That er is a !" Luhan pulled out a fistful of green grass and having his anger out on the lifeless leaves he just killed with his bare hands. His grits his teeth, murdering Jongdae inside his mind more than thrice.
"Luhan, watch your mouth." Joonmyeon sternly scolded the chinese boy that didn't only made Luhan roll his eyes but also Baekhyun's.
"Are you fussing over me, talking bad words or me talking bad words over your Jongdae?" Luhan backhandedly said, shooting Joonmyeon one of his stare. Joonmyeon wrinkled his forehead.
"That's not what i meant.." He answered softly, eyes not meeting the other two's.
Baekhyun kept his phone inside his pocket,"Why? Because you're still concerned with whatever happens to Jongdae?" Baekhyun derisively laugh. He sounded harsh, twitches something inside Joonmyeon.
"You're still in love with him."
Joonmyeon found himself on his feet in record time, fist bawled and teeth gnawing against each other that the other two might be hearing it already."I'm not!" That was the first time he screamed that day. He felt lethargic since the last conversation he had with Kris the other night and he loses his remaining strength just by shouting at his friends. Luhan had his mouth in a big "O" hearing Joonmyeon yelled at him. It seldom happens and when it does, they should do something right away.
When Joonmyeon bravely declared that he doesn't love Jongdae anymore, his heart can only throbbed in steadfast mockery and downright incredulity.
It scares him.
"How did us talking about Xiumin led to me still in love with Jongdae?!" He bellow, matching his scowling face with a heavy voice. His chest was starting to move exhaustedly that the two ruggedly noticed. There was guilt on Luhan's face, and unsteady eye contact. Meanwhile Baekhyun remained hard. Isn't happy with what he's witnessing.
"I-I am sorry Joonmyeonie.." Luhan brought himself up to embrace him, using his nickname and a concern cuddling to channel his remorseful heart. He allowed himself to be drawn down back on his place in between his friends. Luhan handed him a drink and patted his back.
There was silence that stretched between them. The uproar laughs of the other males from a far and the slurping sound of Luhan as he was uneasily drinking his water were the only audible sounds among them. Luhan was glancing at Joonmyeon from time to time, afraid he might have loosen his mouth too much that had gotten Joonmyeon hurt. Baekhyun remained still and stoic to the suffocating silence. Joonmyeon looks at Kris. The tall blonde male smiling so handsomely in a group of Childish talking males. He was caught looking after a minute of staring. Kris gave him a loving smile, that smile that made him look like a teenager again rather than a young man who have lots of responsibilities and a autocratic image to uphold.
Joonmyeon wanted to drown himself in hell with the guilt he wasn't suppose to be feeling, but he does. And he doesn't fully understand why he was harboring such feelings.
"Yifan proposed to me." He announced at the center of the silent black hole that's been eating them up. His lighter voice, was almost inaudible. Nonetheless, heard the striking information he articulated clearly by his friends.
" what?!" Luhan and Baekhyun answered profanities at him in unison. The only difference was, Luhan was disturbingly coughing. The water that he was yet to swallow splashes all over his pants, chokingly punching his chest hard in attempt to evacuate the fluids that somehow made their journey down to his lungs. He turns to Joonmyeon with a strained bewildered face. Baekhyun who was playing -i-don't give-a--with-your-Jongdae-drama was now showering the drool he was reserving for Chanyeol to Joonmyeon who tossed a wedding bomb on him.
"What? he- proposed?!" Baekhyun repeated again, slapping both his hands on either side of Joonmyeon's
face (He wailed in pain) and looking through his friend's eyes to determine if he's pulling a prank on them.
"Yes. He did." Joonmyeon exasperated, wiggled his face out of Baekhyun's hands. The brunette still had his hands in midair as if he was still holding Joonmyeon's small face. He looked stunned, eyes spacing out of the universe.
"Kris's proposed, Kris proposed, Oh my god Kris proposed!" Luhan shouted the last line as if the information finally been decoded inside his brain. Joonmyeon clasped his hand on Luhan's mouth to shut up to not garner attention from the others.
"Now I think I'm the one who needs an inhaler.." Before Joonmyeon could even stop whatever it is that Baekhyun's sneaky fingers were up to, his friend was already in possession of his inhaler. He was puffing shots and inhaling the bronchodilator like it was some kind of .
He was turned three hundred sixty degrees to Luhan. Eager hands and eyes shrouded him."How?! What.. What did you say?!" He'd never heard Luhan squealing like that before, hearing it for the first had his eardrums deteriorating inside.
Joonmyeon nodded, freeing himself from Luhan's clutches. In the league of tall males at the center of the soccer field, Joonmyeon searched for Kris's brown eyes.
The same brown eyes he strived so hard to look straight at the other night.
•••
_C.C
Kris's brown, quiescent irises were fixed on his lover.
Joonmyeon heard his own weary heart slowing its thumping pace. His lungs, stiffed with some invincible string that contained it from doing it's vital purpose of giving him oxygen. His dry lips that had been kept closed were slowly splitting apart as the profound words that came from Kris, conclusively registered inside his head.
"Y-Yi-Yifan.." Joonmyeon strangled reply made his own lids blink spontaneously. The silence that came after his murmured call was throttling Joonmyeon that the slim gap between him and Kris was too much. He grappled out of his lover's lean long arms that were hook around him. He scrambled on his feet, traipsing towards the sliding door as if fleeing from his reality.
Dark, rustling of the trees. City lights that overviews beyond the balcony were like scattered stars. A wonderful scenery. If Joonmyeon didn't heard Kris's question that he seemingly can't respond to, he would have sighed in awestruck at the marvelous view. He would have grabbed a camera and take a picture or rummaged though his drawers to find his antic sketch pad and draw the splendid image. However, he did and his emotions were shifting disquieted thoughts like the rustling leaves, uncertain and unsound. His lids were drawing shut until his sight caught the opposite reflection of a tall man behind him on the glassy door, Kris.
The blonde male was now up on his tall glory. Confounded eyes riveted at Joonmyeon's back. The sight of Kris triggered waves of undesired feelings in Joonmyeon's heart. He wanted to turn around and ask Kris what he just said because he couldn't believe what he just heard from him. The worst was, Joonmyeon couldn't believe how his heart's reacting.
"Wh-at.." Joonmyeon wasn't sure if what he muttered was an appropriate reply. He cursed himself when the taller male, in his ash colored pajama and white v-neck sweater that showed his long honey neck, Adams apple overwrought as it bobbed up and down-looked confused, at the same time shocked. Like he himself was caught off guard with the words his mouth came up with.
"B-babe," Kris ran his fingers through his golden locks before running it straight down his handsome face, grunting lowly and disheartened with his own self. Joonmyeon flinched when Kris dragged a footstep ahead. He regrets his actions, because Kris's expectant expression veers into mystified and pained wrinkles. Joonmyeon really wanted to cry. It wasn't supposed to be like that. It wasn't supposed to be like what was currently happening.
He braved himself, compelled his spastic body to twist around and face Kris because he doesn't deserve to received such a cold reaction. And when he turned, his hand crawled, heading to his neck. If he could only kill himself right there.
He wasn't sure how his face looked like, but it was probably something repugnant since Kris stepped back in retaliation. It made him look away in guilt shame.
"Did I-heard-it right?" Joonmyeon was still doubting the words he heard. His conscience might want to pushed him off hell to burn in remorse and endless torture, whispering words such as marriage.
Kris heaves his frostbitten feet to move and walk to his lover. Something in Joonmyeon taunted him to step back. But his feet remained on where he is stonily standing. Even if his insides were churning some poisonous acid that was rising to be thrown up, he shut his mouth and slowly tilted his chin to meet those brown eyes that were only speaking of love.
And like the last two years of being with Kris, his response to each situations are always unpredictable. Just like how he rewarded Joonmyeon with a shy half smile."I- I wasn't supposed to propose to you." His palm was rubbing a portion of his nape. Joonmyeon's eyes widen confusedly at Kris. He might've really heard wrong or something.
Kris let out a heavy and thick laugh,"I was planning to.. but not now and not here." Joonmyeon gasped, palm found his mouth and sealed it when Kris suddenly hunched, bended one leg as he slumped down and kneeled.
"I was supposed to kneel down in front of you," Kris said, his warming smile was still on. Joonmyeon stared at him in a mix of emotions. Kris moved his hand and pulled something from his pocket. Joomnyeon nearly fainted but didn't when Kris wasn't holding anything but a imaginary thing that he placed on his opened palm. "I'll pull out a small royal blue box." Kris continued, staring at the box made of air on his palm. "I'll say the words'Will you marry me?'while opening the box and showing you the engagement ring." Kris pretended to be flipping the imaginary 'Box' open.
Joonmyeon stood there like a breaking statue, not knowing what he should do.
Kris rose up from kneeling. He jolt up tall and collected in front of Joonmyeon. Kris's smile was erasing, eyes turning serious."I was supposed to propose to you in a place where there's a massive people around. Right in the middle of a stage or a street were thousands of people are watching. They'll stare with all their jaws ripping apart and you, you will cry and say yes to me because you can't say know no, enough to embarrass me in front of all the people." Kris looked down on Joonmyeon with a sheepish smile crossing his handsome face. An embarrassed chuckle wanting to come out and eyes gleaming with hope of a lifetime nurtured with love and romance.
The words said was enough for the tears behind Joonmyeon's eyes to overflow. He covered his mouth from sobbing and clenching his chest, his heart, from vaporizing. His quivering lips attempted to say, "Yifan.." But ended up swallowing the name in successive sobs. He bumped his chest to Kris, tiptoeing his way up to enfold his scrawny arms around Kris's neck, hands his lover's sweater to the point of ripping it apart.
Kris automatically gather Joonmyeon into him. Pressing his body on Joonmyeon as tight as possible. Rubbing circles on his lover's back, feeling his shoulder moistening with bitter tears. He ruffled the crimson curls behind his boyfriend's head affectionately, leveling his mouth to Joonmyeon's ear to mutter something softly."You're not ready yet, to marry me." He concluded.
Kris's words created ringing echoes in Joonmyeon's ears. It wasn't a question, but the way Joonmyeon hang on Kris's desperately, gave away his painful answer."You're not ready to settle down yet. Even to move in with me until we're married." Kris's voice was deep yet it wangled to a soft and cooing voice that made Joonmyeon sobs grew loud.
Kris pulls away, deep frowning at Joonmyeon's wasted state. He quietly erased the tears away with kisses that made Joonmyeon's eyes flutter close."I wanted you to know, that I love you," More tears replaced the dried ones and the sobbing increases,"And I'm willing to wait."
Joonmyeon sobbing stopped like magic. It made Kris's lips curved up into a smile that looked too gentle to even be seen on his usual cold and distant exterior. If his employees sees their boss at the moment, smiling, they'll throw a mass and have a field day. Kris pretended to be opening the imaginary box and gingerly pulling out an imaginary ring, holding it playfully careful to not drop the invincible ring. He held his lover's right hand. Joomyeon didn't snap his hand away and watched Kris through his blurry eyes."I'm going to put this imaginary engagement ring in your middle finger." Joonmyeon nodded like a child as Kris held his hand, inserting the ring carefully like it's a very delicate crystal. They both stared at Joonmyeon's ring finger as if an actual ring was there, twinkling their love for each other.
"I'm going to insert a real ring in your middle finger," Kris brushes his thumb on Joonmyeon's ring finger with an imaginary ring that symbolizes Kris's love and patience."when you're ready to see it there and ready enough to be with me for," Kris leans his head down, lips drawing closer to Joonmyeon's opened ones and before it collided,"the rest of our lives." Joonmyeon closes his eyes when Kris let their lips touched.
Joonmyeon's heart was getting wild and erratic when the two of them parted. When he leaned up to be hugged by Kris, his heart feels like it was being engulfed in flames. Joomyeon bit his lips wanting it to bleed, till he heard voices. Voices of two teenagers that he suppressed eon's ago passes him by like two visiting ghosts.
"You're already engaged to me Joonmyeon, you'll marry me and no one else."
"I wanted to. I wanted to marry you, Jongdae."
Joonmyeon buried his face in Kris's chest. He didn't want to see the bed cause he could see Jongdae and him, hugging each other while exchanging hopeful dreams. He covered his ears because the voices were too surreal like he could hear his and Jongdae past self inside the room.
The pendant hanging and locked between two chest, it's natural warmth queerly feels like a burning wood. A star losing it's shinny light. A metal melting away little by little. Just like Joonmyeon's heart, wanting to just stop beating.
And it was critically hurting him.
•••
_C.C
Now that Joonmyeon thinks about the other night. He wanted to look for a shovel and dig his own pit. Jump into it and never resurface again. He wasn't too proud of himself for whatever had happened. Kris's proposal, albeit it wasn't the real thing, shook his entire world that he wasn't able to even close his eyes for ten minutes. But what was he suppose to do? He wasn't truly ready to settle down, though he was only being honest to the both of them, the look on Kris's face, it wasn't disappointment. It was hopeful.
He intentionally grazes down to check his ring finger, running his thumb across his it as if seeing a ring is in there.
He sighed laboriously, hunched his back, stared and pokes on the grass when a rock of realization hits him. Baekhyun and Luhan weren't saying anything. He checks the two, exclaiming when he found them sitting there with vacant looks. They're souls seemed to have left their body, teleported elsewhere. He frowns, about to shake the two when an empty bottle hits his head. Unfortunately, his curls were too thick that the mere plastic bounces off his hair, landing on the grass.
"Ow!" He draw back his entire body, a hand on his batted right arm to soothe it with gentle rubs. His body was still writhing in pain from Baekhyun's incursion. He didn't saw it coming. Luhan was the sadistic one, not Baekhyun who just punched him.
When he found himself groveled on the ground and unable to get up with Baekhyun straddling him, he concludes that he doesn't really know his best friend that much after all.
"Luhan, get a shovel so we can start digging Joonmyeon grave because !" Joonmyeon got interested in Baekhyun's idea. At least he will no longer dig by himself because his best friends are willing to do it for him."Joonmyeon," Came the rough voice of Baekhyun, picking him with a murderous grim."What the is happening with you?! Kris proposed and what? You just stood there and cried? like a ing idiot?!"
"I don't know who deserves the blockhead award this year. You for making Kris think that you don't want to marry him or you weren't ready, or Kris who thought you weren't ready for a lifetime commitment with him and even gave you enough time to think! Joonmyeon, what the hell are you waiting for?! what the heck is stopping you from saying yes?" Luhan glowered at Joonmyeon.
"It's not a what. It's a who." Baekhyun's eyes twitches. There's only one person capable of ruining Joonmyeon's what was suppose to be. And that person is having sickly skinship to be proud of in the general public, holding hands with Yixing as the two walks around the oval like two married couple having a stroll of their lives under the beautiful moonlight with violins following them around playing a romantic piece. Where's a gun when you need one? Baekhyun wants to shot lovebirds.
"Guys, I didn't reject Yifan and-"
"The idea that you wanted him to wait is already absurd." Luhan deadpans. He needed his mental powers at the moment since he's too soft to choke Joonmyeon with his own bare hands."Kris is wonderful. Your future is secure with him you don't even have to work anymore, you'll just have to stay with him inside that huge castle and sit like a prince, a good spouse who'll wait for Kris with well prepared food on the table with open arms! Kris, he loves you! When will you ever get it?!" Luhan shouted the last part. There was desperation in his voice, lecturing Joonmyeon like a little kid who doesn't understand a thing about life.
The shout reaches Joonmyeon's heart and it knocks him off. The two were only concerned with his future and he understands that. But even if he explains it to them, it's clear. They wouldn't understand even the slightest bit of what he feels.
"I love Yifan.."
"Then marry him for sake!" Baekhyun cried, pulling his brunette strands."Don't mind some bulls who came back Joonmyeon. Just look at him!" Baekhyun hauls him by his shirt, a finger pointing at Jongdae laughing and a Chinese male Yixing, clinging to the other male."He's different. He came back, but not for you." His prank words were sharp and spears deep into Joonmyeon's heart.
Best friends says the exact truthful words no matter how harsh they may sound, so they say.
Joonmyeon's throat coils, it was excruciating. Each of his heart strings snaps into two's hearing those words from Baekhyun. He was only trying to help him, but the words still punctures his heart.
"Stop protecting him." Luhan wanted to pick Joonmyeon up and console him. The pained look in his eyes were too uncomfortable to watch, almost pitiful. Their friend needed to hear a piece of reality check, so even though it's tormenting to see him like that, they have to point it out even if they have to open Joonmyeon's eyes to reality forcibly, they will.
"I'm-I'm not protec-ting him I'm just," He snuffled, mouth unable to form a proper sentence."Kris, I'm just scared. What will he say? What will he do?"
Baekhyun face palmed. He was growing tired of Joonmyeon's anxious thoughts. He was about to retort spicy words to that when a fourth voice interrupted the trios brawling.
"What are you two doing?"
Luhan eyes widen even Joonmyeon stiffens hearing that heavy voice. Baekhyun deliberately climbs off Joonmyeon, scribbles to sit beside Luhan with a freaked out smile. The discussion wasn't over yet but seeing Kris interrupting them with his thick raised brows,(Probably thinking they were killing off his lovely boyfriend, which they were, with words) their little talk will have to wait. They both smiled so prettily at Kris, with a heavenly glowing halo on top of there heads.
"We were just playing Kris!" Luhan is expert in hiding any sort of nervousness on his face at any given moment yet Kris's suspicious eagle eyes were nailed on him and Baekhyun who looked like he's gonna throw up if Kris wouldn't stop giving them his glares. He spread his lips, smiling like a plastic china doll.
"Are you okey? are you hurt somewhere?" Kris worriedly questions Joonmyeon. He helps his lover up, dusting the dirts off Joonmyeon's back with his palm. He glares back at the other two who smiled with sparkly teeth at him.
"I'm not hurt or anything." Joonmyeon couldn't look straight at Kris, moreover at his friends. They might be right about Jongdae and about his stupidly. But will marrying Kris erase or stop whatever it is that's slowly killing him inside?
"We're gonna go and play.. ummm.. Soccer so," Luhan stood up. Kicking a foot at Baekhyun's side when the 's was loving the grass unnecessarily much and wouldn't get up. Baekhyun grumbled at him in response as he rose. The two ran off in a speed of light leaving the couple to themselves.
"Something wrong Babe?" Kris asks, curios at his lover's silence. Joonmyeon shakes his head and smiled his usual smile. It gave Kris's heart away that he stops his own hand from pinching those rosy cheeks when he remembers his hand is dirty.
"I'm gonna go and play with them, watch me?" Kris placed a hand on Joonmyeon's shoulder and walks with him heading to the field. Joonmyeon gave his boyfriend an encouraging smile.
His heart feels heavy.
•••
Luhan loves soccer don't get him wrong. But that's not what he wanted to chat about with Baekhyun. He loops an arm around his friend who was still fussing over his gnawing side like a girl, and drags him to a little secluded area from the rest (Behind Chanyeol since the tall physique can cover two scheming males from the rest) of the group who were talking about what were their favorite superhero during their diaper years. Luhan starts counting strategies on how they will kill Jongdae and marry Joonmyeon off to someone who's worth loving. They discussed their insights as if their kind friend was their son that they terribly needed to set an arrange marriage with Kris.
They were busy talking like buzzing mosquitos behind a giant's back when Kris threw the soccer ball at Luhan, beckoning him to join them. Baekhyun shrugs, wasn't fond of playing some sports that could drench him with sticky sweats. He only brought one extra shirt and he's currently wearing it.
The feel of the round and slight muddy soccer ball on Luhan's hands revived his undying passion for the said healthy sport, shorty forgetting their friend's dilemma. He nods to Kris and drags the absentminded Baekhyun along.
"I'm not playing Luhan!" The brunette anti-soccer fan wiggled his limbs out of Luhan's claws. The sport minded nonchalantly rolled his eyeballs, still encumbering Baekhyun by his headlock.
"Yes you are because I said so." The rest of the group gathered at the middle of the field. Luhan releases Baekhyun, grabbed a bundle of the other's brunette hair when he dared to make an escape. Baekhyun, who had no choice but to play, whined back to Luhan's, side murmuring the word," ." incessantly.
There were six of them (Yixing decided to stay out and seats behind the depressed Joonmyeon to just watch and cheer for the boys).
The time to chose teammates had come and before anyone could chose someone to be on there team, Luhan beat all of them to it and begun calling out names.
"Baekhyun and Kris will be on my team and c'mon Kris! use that long legs of yours and stand behind me, hurry hurry!" Kris's eyes involuntary shot swords of glares at Luhan for mandating him around like a boss,( Who does he think he is?!) but he did move to be on the chinese side anyway.
"Who are you to decide who's on the side of whom?" As Luhan expected from an like Jongdae who tilted his chin and smirked at him courageously, Luhan's hold on the ball tightened, it was a miracle it didn't popped out yet.
"Me, Luhan. If you have a problem, get lost." Luhan bashed cruelly, confidence smelling off him. Jongdae snorted, looking behind him and cocking his head at Xiumin and Chanyeol.
"Before we start. Let's make this more fun and less boring." Luhan waddled back and forth in front of Jongdae with the ball bobbing up and down on his right hand."If I- I mean If we win," He spare his Baozi a glance before speaking again." If we win, you'll hand Baozi over and he'll have to surrender himself to me tonight."
Baekhyun face-palmed, Kris looked scandalized, Jongdae was yawning, Chanyeol tapped a finger on Xiumin's shoulder to whisper,"Hyung, who's Baozi?" The older male's face looks like a squished flour, drained from any colors of life.
"Are you crazy Luhan? If that happens, your the only one who will enjoy our little victory." Baekhyun crossed his arms, mouthing an 'I'm sorry ' to Chanyeol for being involved in his friend's mission to corrupt Xiumin's innocence. The lanky boy just grinned at him.
Luhan tugged a strand of honey hair behind his ear and smiled perkily,"Don't worry Baek, I'm not that selfish. I'll let you know every details of my marvelous night with my Baozi." He declared, sending needles of shivers down Xiumin's bones.
"I'm not playing.." Xiumin removed his yankee cap lifelessly and gallops away from the group, head hanging and shoulders limply hunched, his small body wilted. Luhan panicks in dismay witnessing his mate leave, with hands waving frantically."Okey fine, never mind!" He shouted. Xiumin stopped a foot from taking another step and cheerfully ran back behind Jongdae. He really wanted to play.
Kris pushed Luhan over to take charge. He scratched his head awkwardly, tilting his body to one side to take a look at Xiumin."Ummm.. Hyung?" He isn't really used to calling someone Hyung. Majority of the people he met (aside from work) and his friend's were mostly younger than him. Xiumin is Joonmyeon's co-worker and he respects his lover's friends. Despite the awkwardness he feels, he gave him an apologetic smile."Are you okey there?"
"Yeah!" With a thumbs up, Xiumin smiled at him before looking down when saw Luhan waving a hand at him.
Luhan pouted. He'll just have to think of a new approach.
Kris made an announcement that they don't have to be too competitive. Just play ball and have fun. They all agreed, except for one who is more eager to hit someone than to play nice. The game started with Jongdae kicking the ball and aiming for the other's goal line where the tall Canadian Kris was guarding with all his long and advantageous limbs. Before Jongdae got any closer, Luhan was already on his moves and stole the ball, giving Jongdae a mocking salute as he snatched the ball and passed it to Baekhyun.
Baekhyun ran as fast as his short lean legs and cute feet can. Soccer isn't his very own cup of tea but he did played soccer for the sake of his crush noticing him back in college. If there is anyone who is good at it, it's Luhan. The chinese editor was too obsessed with it. Walking around their place donning his soccer jersey plushies, playing ball inside the living room that disastrously crashed Baekhyun's laptop (He kicked Luhan out of the apartment for three days. Joonmyeon was the good samaritan providing Luhan with a blanket and a pillow, and eventually joined camping out with Luhan in hopes that Baekhyun's conscience will shakes him awake in the middle of the night. Funny thing was, it didn't) Staying up all night to watch his favorite soccer team. Baekhyun had to suffer the downside of being Luhan's board mate, finding himself tangled in his duvet, the world spinning and a Luhan dragging the tip of his cocoon haven to the living room to come face to face with the tv and gave him a rewind telecast of how his soccer team won as if Baekhyun cares. It was two in the morning for sake!
He huffs and paused for a second when he saw who's guarding the opposing team's goal line. A tall, puppy eyed, crazy grin minus the involuntary eyes twitches, Chanyeol. He giggles and forgot he was in a war game. He waves a graceful hand to say hello to his boyfriend when another hand made of steel hits his nape.
"You better hit the goal or else I will kill you!" It was Luhan, yelling at Baekhyun's ear as loud as a megaphone. Baekhyun alertly ran, kicking the ball after trembling from Luhan's nuisance voice that's still ringing inside his ears.
He kicked the ball, avoiding Xiumin who failed to steal it. The ball flew straight towards the goal, only to be shot back when Chanyeol's long limbs intercepted it. Luhan cursed and chase the ball that was now with Jongdae. Chanyeol bobs up and down, throwing his limbs in the air, happy for guarding the goal well. Baekhyun mindlessly approached his lover and gave him a congratulatory kiss.
"Luhan won't be happy with that." Joonmyeon commented, but tries to cheer away.
Luhan wailed in misery when Jongdae scored. He blamed it all on Kris who defended himself by reasoning." He was fast." Luhan gritted his teeth and went for the ball, successfully taking the ball when Jongdae was about to pass it to Xiumin.
Xiumin was on Luhan, skillfully attempting to get the ball from Luhan. The ball bounces up in the air with Luhan catching it with both hands."Hey Baozi.." He conversationally chirps, swiftly tossing the ball back up in the air, playing 'catch it, as if you can' with Xiumin.
"Ye-yeah?" Xiumin was weirded by the fact that he replied and the fact that Luhan was now swinging the ball around like they were playing basketball. Jongdae was laughing at the back and Kris was talking in mandarin as if Luhan was at the mood to listen.
"I'll give you this ball if and only if," Luhan threw the ball up high. He pushes his arms passed Xiumin's neck, catching the ball behind with his bare hands. Xiumin gulps a sack of rocks when Luhan was a lips away from him."You'll make out with me." He winks his doe eye.
Xiumin gapes,"N-o s-orry.." Xiumin reluctantly pushes Luhan off as kind as his soft voice can say, the ball being caught by Jongdae from behind. The troll ran back to the other goal shouting,"No flirting, get your head in the game!" The theft scored with Kris too distracted to prevent the ball from passing him by.
"Luhan!" Both Kris and Baekhyun frustratedly berated Luhan for spazzing with his crush and letting his guard down. Xiumin left the gloomy Luhan and high five with Jongdae and Chanyeol.
"What is wrong with you?!" Kris, who previously said that cut competitiveness they're in it for fun, admonished Luhan in Chinese like an aging soccer coach, forcing Luhan out or to switch places, which the Chinese editor declined. He went for the ball and for revenge, more determined than he ever was.
"Be sure to score or else it's you that I'm gonna kill." The ball was on Luhan's care, dribbling it after Baekhyun passed the ball to him with a deadly promise. He nods, it was time for him to use all his remaining energy to end the game.
He went for the goal with Jongdae one foot ahead of him. Jongdae's smirk that reeks a sarcastic blend of belittling Luhan kicked the editor off his patience. He picked the ball up, jeopardizing the rule and the goal of his team. He throws the ball, it flew straight to it's target. Luhan was laughing ferociously as he waits for the speeding ball to hit Jongdae's smirking face, hoping it will affect his health and kills him soon enough.
Both Yixing and Joonmyeon were holding their voices in as the heart stopping moment of the ball coming in contact with Jongdae's face was like a life and death situation that all they could do sit back and watch.
By some game of fate, the ball missed the snarky smirking boy who quick-wittedly dodged down, praise his versatile reflexes.The ball remarkably collided at the shorter male with almond eyes and cute cheeks who was innocently standing behind Jongdae like a waiting net with opened arms, mouth all widen, blank mind and eyes looking at his forthcoming annihilation.
"No Baozi!" Luhan's outcry was horrifying to hear.
The ball was too speedily strong that it sent Xiumin flying off the grass, rolling like a bowling ball with whimpering sounds of a live bun that had been stepped on by a hundred soldiers. Kris's team was suppose to be cheering in success since the ball (with Xiumin) hits the goal with an unprepared stupefied, Chanyeol.
All of the players rushes to Xiumin. Yixing and Joonmyeon had a marathon ran in order to reach the crime scene. Xiumin was shrieking in pain. The ball might have fractured his skull or nose with the amount of hammering headache he's suffering.
"Minseok!" Jongdae was there first, carefully cradling his friend's head and checking the whimpering male. Chanyeol was on the victim's side, mumbling some first aid notes. Kris was asking if the poor guy was (Still alive) conscious while Baekhyun just stood there.
"Baozi I'm sorry I'm so so sorry that wasn't meant for you! Are you-" All the people surround Xiumin were pushed away as the Chinese male Luhan approaches Xiumin. He flick Jongdae's arms that were on his Baozi and possessively took what he thinks is his.
Xiumin got up slowly. His body was aching everywhere, who is he kidding, he was blown yards off from where he was last standing dumbfounded. His muscles were tense like he just came out of war(for some miracle, alive) He was feeling lightheaded from the head trauma. His head still hurts, he bites his lips to control his whimpers and wailings. He doesn't want to hear Luhan's dreadful cries anymore like he's been shot by a gun and needed an immediate resuscitation.
"I'm going to be alright." Xiumin said as soft as a whisper reassuring the people around specially Luhan who was bawling behind, hugging him. He rubs Luhan's shoulder to comfort him and shushed him to stop crying. He was relieved Luhan calms on his first touches. He got up on his teetering legs, Luhan was immediately there by his side, instinctively slings Xiumin's arm around his neck to balance him. Xiumin slowly opens his eyes and closed it back because he felt everything spinning, he feels nauseous .
Luhan caresses Xiumin's sore forehead. Everyone was dead quite watching the two. When Luhan saw the ball, he soundlessly kicks the ball with his iron leg,"Baek, take the ball." He calls. As the ball hits Luhan's foot and came to life, it speeds off and pounces on the oblivious brunette male.
The ball hit something.
"Wh-wha-agh!" Baekhyun fell on the ground dramatically. He screeches in pain, body in fetal position and hands cupped on his most sensitive manhood where the ball mischievously was aimed. The thud sound of something that got hit bulls-eyes raises everyone's strands and exclaimed an"Ow!" sounds. Some were covering their own crotches hearing Baekhyun writhing in agony.
Everyone gasped seeing Baekhyun rolling on the grass, shouting and at nears tears. Joonmyeon was on his knees beside his friend. Chanyeol panics and ran over to his lover. Lay was filled with worry, helping Baekhyun up. Luhan closes his eyes as if he could feel Baekhyun's pain. He muttered his apologies but only got a strangled "Go an-d die Lu-han you!" in returned. Meanwhile, Kris and Jongdae were the two bystanders observing all of them with tortured expressions.
Their mornings exercise ended bloody and brutal with Baekhyun deliriously calling all saints and praying his maleness is still intact. He will not hesitate to kill Luhan and take out all of his vital organs, open for donations, if something, even a tiny bit of his 'precious' got damaged for life. Xiumin fainted in Luhan's car when he felt a red sticky fluid dripping from his nose.
Joonmyeon blames himself for everything.
***
Hi guys!
I know :(, it's almost a month without updates. Sorry!! I've been having problems. Forgive me?? :(
Sorry for this update. This was actually longer but I cut it in the middle because, I made all of you wait and if I'll update the entire thing, it'll probably take awhile :( sorry. I already have the other part drafted. Still need some scenes inserted and all. Yeah. I'm sorry ;(
Sorry for the Errors!
Hope you still comment. :(
k.
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