D O N G H A E

I stood at the hull of the boat, shielding my eyes from the midday sun. The vast expanse of blue – cerulean and royal – stretched before me, rolling, undulating and gently rocking the ship.

I didn’t want to spend another moment waiting outside Yoona’s room at the hospital. I felt so powerless there – I felt like I couldn’t do anything to help her. I’m not even allowed to go inside for more than thirty minutes. Most of all, I felt alone. Yoona’s family hadn’t arrived yet and by the time they’d come, I’d probably gone insane.

That’s why I went to my father.

No. Dad didn’t magically spring back to life.

No. I didn’t go to the cemetery where he was buried either. It was too drab in that place.

I went to Gongho Island.

I drove away from the hospital, rented a boat and sailed to Gongho Island – a small speck of uninhabited land west of the seashore in Mokpo. This was where my father would take our whole family when I was young.  This was where my brother and I used to play as kids - running back and forth on the sand with our bare feet.

I felt my father’s presence there.

Once, when SME allowed us to visit our families, I sailed out with my mother and brother to Gongho. We stood in silence as we gathered around the small orchid garden. We felt as if Dad was there with us, gazing upon the beautiful faces of the flowers and enjoying the warmth of the afternoon sun.

I wanted to go to Gongho because I wanted to feel my father. I wanted to feel his embrace. I wanted him to help me pray for a miracle.

~~~

S I W O N

Yoong,

I went to see Dad. By the time I get back, I really hope you’re awake.

I love you.

 - Hae

I looked up from the letter Donghae left in Yoona’s room to Donghwa, who was shaking his head and answered before I could even ask. “Mom and I already checked at the cemetery. He wasn’t there.”

“I called my husband’s family,” Mrs. Lee put in. The lines on her face have deepened with worry. “Donghae wasn’t there either.”

“I think I know where he is,” Eunhyuk spoke up. We led Hae’s family into my car. Eunhyuk hopped into the front seat and Donghwa and Mrs. Lee slid into the back.

“Are you sure he’s there?” Donghwa asked us.

“Hae told me a story once,” Eunhyuk explained as he put on his seatbelt. “If he’s going to his Dad, then he’s going to that place.”

~~~

By the time we were five minutes from the harbor, the skies have darkened into a deep grey. Far off in the distance, lightning flashed, splitting the sky in two with bright yellow jagged lines. The boom of the thunder then followed, making the earth sound like a furious, starved tiger.

“The weather doesn’t look good,” I looked up as I steered the vehicle into the parking lot.

Eunhyuk hastily pressed the radio and we listened as the DJ’s voice came on.“A storm is expected to hit Southwest Korea. Towns and cities by the shoreline will be heavily affected…”

We turned off the radio station and hopped off the car. We have to find Donghae before the storm starts.

~~~

E U N H Y U K

Some fifteen minutes later, we covered the whole stretch of land by the sea but Hae was still nowhere to be seen. His mother decided to rest at the car.

“Why don’t you ask around? Maybe the people here have seen my son.” she suggested as she got into the backseat and take out a bottle of water.

We did just that, but there weren’t a lot of people at the harbor that day. The fishermen left their boats roped to the docks and they themselves probably left for home early, aware of the storm that was coming. 

Desperate, we headed to the nearest establishment – a boathouse. The wooden door creaked as it swung open. An elderly man with a grayish beard was leaning back against his chair, his feet propped up on the desk. He was clutching a bottle of beer in one hand.

“G’afternoon, how may I help you?” he slurred without moving an inch.

“Did you see a man this tall with orange hair?” Siwon asked, gesturing appropriately.  

“Ah, yes, now that you mentioned it,” the old man flexed his legs and slowly placed his feet on the ground. “A young man with wild, crazy colored hair came runnin’ in, wantin’ to sail out. I tol’ him there’d be a storm, but he ain’t listenin’. So I gave ‘im a boat…”

“In what direction did it go?” Donghwa interrupted.

The old man pointed west. “Wanted to go to some island. You guys his friends? You better look for him. The skies don’ look friendly one bit.”

~~~

“Tell Mrs. Lee about this and call Coast Patrol,” Siwon told Donghae’s brother. Donghwa obediently nodded and ran back to the car.

“He’s unconsciously committing suicide,” my friend sighed and scratched his head. Not long after the words came out of his mouth, tiny drops of water began falling from the sky. Then a couple of seconds after, the drizzle turned into a downpour. As we ran back to the car, the wind whipped at us, making it impossible to run in a straight line.

Lightning flashed and thunder echoed.

Deep in our hearts, we were praying that our friend would be alright.