Seunghyun spent his remaining time on Cyworld going through his messages, deleting most of them. He marked most of the remaining as private since he didn’t want the whole world seeing them. So, he was good with Jiyong for now.

The only reason he was going through all of this was because he knew he was weak to Jiyong’s cute request. He could have tried to lie but he knew it was pointless, especially when he kept getting adorable text messages from him.

From: Jiyong-ah

I was worried if you got home okay. You are okay, right?

From: Jiyong-ah

You know what I realized? You are a lot like a turtle that is just starting to come out of its shell.

From: Jiyong-ah

Choi Shellhyun. kekekeke

Seunghyun felt like jelly reading those messages. Jiyong was being too much to handle when he really needed to focus. He had promotions about his music on his page but he had to get rid of a lot more than he thought he had. Tons of propositions from ty looking boys and girls. The girls were the worst. They were hard to turn down. He just wasn’t interested and they took that personally. The boys were easier to lie to. He wished he had more restrictions on who could send him messages. It disgusted him sometimes. They all thought he was attractive and successful when really he was an overweight loser making raps in his free time.

After he finished he laid on his bed wondering how to answer Jiyong’s rhetorical comments. He felt so dirty after going through his secret life for hours. He felt unworthy to even speak to someone like Jiyong. He sighed and placed his phone on his desk and buried his head in his pillow trying to forget about the loser that he was. This he couldn’t expect Jiyong to understand. That it made him feel better about himself by being someone else.

Seunghyun spent the rest of the week debating whether or not to accept Jiyong’s friend request. He occasionally answered Jiyong’s simple text messages but when the topic of Cyworld came up he didn’t answer him. As much as it hurt, he didn’t know if he wanted to let Jiyong that far into his world so soon. He wanted to be the perfect guy for Jiyong and at this moment he felt he was far from it.

Seunghyun dragged himself home on Friday and knew he couldn’t avoid it since he would be seeing Jiyong the next day. He snuck into his noona’s room. She was at work so she wouldn’t notice. He the computer and put in her “secret” password. He brought up his usual digital world and logged into his Cyworld to accept his request.

After he accepted he looked around Jiyong’s page and what he saw kind of shocked him. Jiyong seemed to be rather popular. He didn’t answer a lot of the messages on his page but he had a lot of requests to go to parties and love confessions from girls, as well as some messages heavy with flirting. Some were casual, asking for help on their schoolwork and others were downright scary. Jiyong was polite answering them, usually saying he had too much work to handle a relationship, but never seemed to show much interest. Most of them seemed to go to his school. Seunghyun was intrigued with this Jiyong. The Jiyong that everyone else saw.

As he thought that, he panicked. Would Jiyong think that the persona he had online was really him? Maybe he should come a little clean with him. He fumbled with his phone and after many attempts at coming up with a proper message finally came up with something somewhat intelligible.

To: Jiyong-ah

I have something to confess to you before you freak out.

Seunghyun could feel his hands moisten and start to shake. He never felt so nervous. This could ruin everything, He shouldn’t have been so reckless online but it was so easy when no one could see who he really was.

After an eternity of deep breathing and running his soaking hands on his pant legs he heard his phone buzz on the desk.

From: Jiyong-ah

…you’re scaring me, hyung. What is it?

. Now he was scared. He didn’t mean to make him tense. He was trying to ease into the topic, not make Jiyong think it was the end of the world, even though it seemed to feel like it was approaching.

To: Jiyong-ah

Well, on Cyworld I have a lot of internet friends who aren’t the nicest people. I want them to like and promote me so I act like a jerk too.

To: Jiyong-ah

I don’t want you thinking I’m like that. It’s just, they wouldn’t treat me the same if they knew what I was really like.

Seunghyun waited while his heart fought hard against his ribcage to be set free. He could feel his whole body tingle with hypersensitivity waiting for the sound of his phone. His eyes were glued to the clamshell on the desktop. Nothing else mattered at this very moment. When it buzzed, Seunghyun jumped up into a standing position and his heart nearly won its freedom from its cage.

From: Jiyong-ah

It’s okay. I understand. I know you aren’t a jerk, just as long as you don’t think I’m a popular player when you see my Cyworld. Kekekeke

To: Jiyong-ah

You are seriously the best. Thank you for making me feel a little better.

Seunghyun still felt nervous. He never explained the lengths of his behavior online. It was more than being the typical wanja that jerks are known to be. He was a really repulsive person online. If Jiyong could understand his reasoning for this, he was more mature than most of the people he knew. He heard the familiar buzz again and picked up his phone to read the incoming message.

From: Jiyong-ah

We all lie a little to people to make who we are easier for others to swallow.Just dont lose yourself in it.I hope you can always show who you really are to me.

Seunghyun didn’t know how to react what Jiyong just said. He was okay with his lies because he lied? He doesn’t want him to lie to him but does that mean that Jiyong has been lying to him about things? He was happy that Jiyong wanted to know the real him and understood but at the same time he felt uneasy.

Who was Jiyong really and what were his lies?