[Warning: This chapter contains sensitive and criminal themes, and may not be suitable for some audiences. Discretion is advised.]

Junsu sighed heavily as he looked up from the floor at Yunho.

“I really don’t know where to even start.” admitted Junsu.

“I know I need to explain why Jae tried to…” started Junsu before he buried his face in his hands trying to force that image out of his thoughts. “But…”

“Take your time” whispered Yunho “and tell me.”

“What happened between Jae and Soo Hee?” questioned Yunho cautiously.

At the sound of Yunho’s question, Junsu immediately stood up and walked to the balcony doors. Staring out the window, the rage that had subsided a few hours ago flared back up as he clinched his fist and hit the glass. Seeing Junsu’s reaction to his question, Yunho waited a few moments before he whispered, “What did she do to him?”

“Yunho you’ve known me for a very long time.” started Junsu “In all the time you’ve known me, have I ever hit a woman?”

“Never.” admitted Yunho.

“Tonight was the very first time in my life, I wanted to.” sighed Junsu “And, I almost did.”

Turning back from the window, Junsu looked up at Yunho with a look of pure self-disappointment.

“I was so angry after seeing Jae like that…” continued Junsu before he trailed off.

“Its alright.” comforted Yunho. “You were angry.”

“No it’s not.” sighed Junsu. “That’s never alright.”

“What happened?” begged Yunho softly after a few moments of silence had passed between them “What did she say?”

[Flashback: 4 Hours Earlier]

As Junsu watched Yunho carry Jaejoong out of the hall, he immediately set to his task of tracking down Soo Hee. With his anger flaring beyond all reason, he searched through the crowd with a determination he had never had before. After ten minutes had passed, he finally spotted Soo Hee chatting up the President and CEO of Shining Star Entertainment. Without a word uttered, Junsu ran up to Soo Hee, grabbed her by the wrist and dragged her out the nearest exit into the hallway. As Soo Hee protested and tried to pull away from his grip, Junsu squeezed harder making her whine in pain, “Let me go!” Junsu didn’t answer and continued to drag her down the barren hallway until he found an empty room. Opening the door and pulling her in behind him, Junsu slammed the door shut. Junsu snatched her around to face him and increased his grip on her until she cried out in pain. The look on her face disgusted Junsu as he pushed her back and released her arm.

Soo Hee instantly fell back and landed in the large leather bound chair behind her. Looking up with a wounded look and trying to garner some sympathy from the man who was being uncharacteristically violent towards her, Soo Hee flashed a smile and tried to lighten to the mood. Her actions didn’t result in her desired effect, as Junsu immediately took two steps towards her and reared back his hand. “Don’t” she cried out as she threw up her hands and covered her face. Her plea didn’t go unnoticed by Junsu, as he suddenly realized what he was about to do and forced himself to stop. Dropping his hand to his side, he dropped his head and tried to stem the tide of anger that had come over him. Taking a step back from Soo Hee, Junsu reached up and rubbed his head as he slowly took in a breath. After a few seconds, he glared up at Soo Hee with a dagger-like stare.

“What the hell did you do?” growled Junsu angrily.

“What?” Soo Hee chuckled softly “Is this about that pretty boy?”

“You !” Junsu growled as he clinched his fist once more.

“Don’t you dare play around with me!”  yelled Junsu “Answer my question!”

“Why should I?” smiled Soo Hee with a vicious look “Did I hurt the poor boy’s feelings?”

“Don’t try my patience!” growled Junsu.

“I don’t owe you any explanation.”  answered Soo Hee with contempt in her voice and the a wave of her hand “Who the hell do you think you are anyway?”

“You will answer me!” yelled Junsu as he took a menacing step towards her. “I will get the truth out of you one way or another!”

“What can you do?” spat Soo Hee “You’re just a pathetic excuse for a company President. You have no influence here.”

“Oh really?” questioned Junsu as his temperament instantly changed from anger to sarcasm. “I wouldn’t be so sure.”

Junsu reached into his pocket and pulled out his cellphone. He quickly dialed a number and as the caller on the other line picked up, he put the call on speaker so Soo Hee could hear it.

“Hello?” questioned Secretary Kim.

“Secretary Kim?” started Junsu “Could you please pull the medical files for Ms. Kim Soo Hee. It looks like we will have to deal with her pregnancy and abortion rumors after all.”

“If that information gets out…” answered Secretary Kim.

“You wouldn’t dare!” interrupted Soo Hee.

“Oh but wouldn’t I?” answered Junsu “I do public relations for a living. Did you honestly think that I didn’t have dirt on everyone from the party tonight?”

“FINE!” agreed Soo Hee angrily “I’ll tell you!”

“Secretary Kim?” said Junsu with a sarcastic and satisfied smile “Never mind.”

“Yes Mr. President.” replied Secretary Kim.

As Junsu hung up the phone, Soo Hee crossed her arms in front of her and mumbled “What do you want to know?”

“Tell me everything that happened between you and Jaejoong tonight.” answered Junsu “And if I think you’re leaving anything out, you will be headline news in the morning!”

“The same thing that always happens.” started Soo Hee nonchalantly “I tricked him into believing that he accidentally made me spill wine on my dress and like a good little gentleman he offered to me to my room so I could change. When we got there I came on to him. He rejected me and I lost my temper.”

“I yelled at him, cursed at him, and called him every name I could think of.” she continued. “I think I even threatened to ruin his career at one point.”

“What did Jae do?” questioned Junsu as he grit his teeth trying to fight back the urge to strangle her.

“That was the strange thing about the whole situation.” admitted Soo Hee casually “Usually when I get rejected and lose my temper, the guy either storms out or yells back. That pretty-boy just stood there, as if he was frozen in place.”

“He has a name.” grumbled Junsu under his breath.

“I watched him for a few minutes.” she continued “But he just stood there staring off into space, as if everything I had said, he had heard before.”

“After that, I felt sorry for him and tried to be sweet.” said Soo Hee “I walked up to him and handed him my room key.”

“I told him to take the key, go collect himself, and comeback in a hour.” sighed Soo Hee “And he left.”

“He never came back.” She added.

“After what she told me, I couldn’t even stand being in the same room with her.” added Junsu “So, I left before I did something really stupid.”

“But that was hours ago!” replied Yunho “Where have you been?”

“I took a walk to cool off.” answered Junsu “And thought about how I was going to explain Jaejoong’s actions tonight.”

“I know you want to know why he did what he did.” continued Junsu “And after everything you went through tonight, you have a right to know, but I’m not sure if I really should be the one to tell you.”

“Jae…” stuttered Junsu “went through a lot when he was younger.”

“It’s alright Junsu.” smiled Yunho “Take your time.”

“First of all I owe you two apologies.” started Junsu “I lied to you, twice.”

“About?” questioned Yunho with a puzzled look.

“Remember I told you that I had no idea about the story behind the scars on Jaejoong’s wrists?” sighed Junsu “That wasn’t entirely true.”

“What do you mean?” questioned Yunho as he dropped his eyes to the floor “Tell me everything.”

“Very well.” replied Junsu “Just remember to keep your promise to me.”

“I will.” agreed Yunho.

“I told you before how Jae’s father died suddenly when he was just fifteen, didn’t I? Well he took it really hard and began to rebel against the world. He started hanging out with all kinds of seedy characters and women with absolutely no morals. His father had left him an enormous inheritance and he chose to spend that money as fast as he possibly could. He drank constantly, had affairs with numerous women, and even dabbled in drugs trying to deal with his own guilt. He blamed himself for his father’s death and no one could seem to convince him that it wasn’t his fault.”

“He was constantly at war with the remaining members of his family.” Junsu continued as the nervousness in his voice increased “And after a year and half of acting like a thug and a drunk, his step mother disowned him. She cut off all contact and used her legal team to freeze all of his bank accounts and cards, hoping that it would snap him out of his rebellious phase.”

“Her actions had the opposite effect.” sighed Junsu “Instead of learning his lesson, as she put it, Jaejoong got more heavily engrossed in Seoul’s criminal underground. Trying to survive, he did everything he could, from stealing and selling drugs to working for shady gangsters as a runner. He continued to drink and party as if nothing had changed financially and got in deep with a well known and vicious money lender named Ji-Young.”

“Oh God.” whispered Yunho as he shook his head.

“Soon after, Ji-Young started pressuring Jae to pay back what he owed him.” sighed Junsu “But, Jae kept avoiding him.”

“And then one night…” said Junsu as tears began to form in his eyes “they finally caught him.”

Junsu immediately buried his head in his hands and began to cry softly.

“What happened?” sighed Yunho reassuringly.

“They made him pay his debt.” cried Junsu “In the worse possible way.”

“They chained him up like a dog and …” cried Junsu before he gasped “And had their way with him.”

“Dear God NO!” cried Yunho.

“They treated him like some common .” continued Junsu “And kept him confined for a year as their new pet.”

“They repeatedly abused him over and over for an entire year.” said Junsu before he lost all of his remaining composure and began to sob uncontrollably.

Yunho could no longer contain the utter heartbreak welling up inside him as he began to cry alongside Junsu. Images of what Jaejoong must have had endured during that time began to flash wildly through Yunho’s mind causing his hands to instantly shake from the sense of fear and anger rising in him. “How could they do such a thing to someone so kind?” thought Yunho as he buried his head in his hands and continued to cry softly.

After what seemed like an eternity, Junsu looked up at Yunho and frowned.

“After a year had passed…” he added “Ji-Young suddenly let Jae go without any explanation. They turned him out on the street and he was ordered never to show his face in that area again.”

“How they hell did he survive it all?” questioned Yunho “How could he endure so much and still be cheerful?”

“It took him years before he could function normally around people again.” answered Junsu “But as you’ve seen firsthand, he’s never completely gotten over it.”

“His scars…” sighed Junsu “probably happened after all of that. At least, that’s what I think.”

“Jae did partially admit that he had tried to end his life during that time.” added Junsu “but he never said how.”

“But what does that part of his past have to do with what happened tonight with Soo Hee?” questioned Yunho with a confused look.

“Ever since that time in his life, Jaejoong has become deathly afraid of intimacy.” sighed Junsu “He can’t stand to be touched without warning. He doesn’t form physical relationships with anyone and he doesn’t date. The thought of another person touching him any way other than friendly contact, scares the hell out of him.”

“This is where the second lie I need to apologize for comes in.” added Junsu “I lied to you about the woman you saw with Jaejoong Friday night.”

“You asked me if she was his girlfriend.” said Junsu “And I said I didn’t know which was untrue.”

“Her name is Park Eun Mi.” explained Junsu “She is one of Jae’s closest friends and happens to be his therapist.”

“They are very close. Like a brother and a sister to one another in real life…” continued Junsu “but to the outside world she plays the part of his girlfriend.”

“Plays the part?” questioned Yunho “What do you mean?”

“Because of the trauma he endured all those years ago, Eun Mi acts like his girlfriend in front of the public.” informed Junsu “She regularly attends parties and events with him, and to everyone else’s knowledge, they are a legitimate couple.”

“But secretly, this is just a lie.” added Junsu “It’s her way of helping Jaejoong avoid any situation that would bring back up those painful memories.”

“Then where the hell was she tonight?” questioned Yunho angrily “If she had been there then Soo Hee wouldn’t have…”

“I know.” replied Junsu “Normally she would have been there, but her father collapsed suddenly this morning and she had to take an emergency flight back to the US.”

“Then why did he even come to the party?” questioned Yunho. “Why would he risk it?”

“It doesn’t matter.” dismissed Junsu.

“Now you understand why Jaejoong did what he did.” said Junsu as he tried to steer the conversation away from that question “When Soo Hee cornered him, the memories of that time came flooding back and he had a panic attack.”

“Jaejoong fights his feelings of insecurity on a daily basis. It’s been difficult for him.” continued Junsu “He’s constantly trying to keep at bay the feelings of self-loathing he harbors and when something like this happens, he gives into them.”

“That’s why he tried to end his life.” sighed Junsu “He lost himself in all that pain, all over again, and for a moment he truly gave up.”

 “I will be forever in your debt for stopping him Yunho.” smiled Junsu with an overwhelming sense of gratitude after a few moments of silence had passed between them “You saved his life.”

“Now I understand why you made me promise not to think any less of Jaejoong.” admitted Yunho “If anyone else knew about this, they would instantly condemn him and if we had taken him to the hospital…”

“Exactly, he would have been committed to the psych ward.” added Junsu with a frown “And put on suicide watch.”

 “Yunho, your music helped Jae through that difficult time when he was recovering from his trauma.” revealed Junsu “If it hadn’t been for you, I don’t think Jae would have survived it.”

“Because of that…” continued Junsu “you are the most precious person in the world to him.”

“And if you were to shun him, now that you know the truth about his past…” sighed Junsu before he trailed off again.

“That won’t happen.” declared Yunho “I swear it!”

“And that’s why I love you.” added Junsu with a smile “Even though you don’t show it often; you have a very good heart.”

“I couldn’t ask for a better friend and brother.” smiled Junsu.

Yunho slowly wiped away the latent tears that still streamed down his cheeks as his stood up and tried to gather his composure.

“Get some sleep Su.” smiled Yunho before he began to walk off.

“Oh…” started Junsu before he stopped himself and smiled as he watched Yunho make his way back to the master bedroom.

“Thank you Yunnie.” whispered Junsu softly with a smile “Thank you.”

Yunho made his way back to Jaejoong’s bedside and as he sat down in the chair, he looked upon his face and sighed deeply. After absorbing everything that he learned tonight, the only thought that kept racing through Yunho’s mind was that he had to get back to Jaejoong. His worry for Jaejoong had only intensified with his new found knowledge. Reaching out to the bedside table, he grabbed a white candle hiding near the back and placed it close to him. He grabbed a candle striker from the drawer and lit the candle before turning off the small table lamp. As the flame’s light flickered across the room and caressed both of their faces, Yunho whispered…

“It will be ok. I promise.”