[Warning: This chapter contains themes and events not suitable for some audiences. Discretion is advised.]

“What are we going to do?” whined Junsu as he sat on the couch and rubbed his bloodshot eyes.

“I don’t know.” sighed Yoochun

For over ten hours, Yoochun and Junsu had been scouring the city trying to find Jaejoong with absolutely no luck. Sifting through everything they knew about Jiyoung and Junjin, they had searched every place they could think of for any signs of Jaejoong but had come up empty. Frustrated and out of options, Yoochun and Junsu decided to contact the local police precinct and file a missing person’s report. After explaining the history between Jaejoong and Junjin, the police asserted that Jaejoong’s kidnapping was simply a way for Junjin and Jiyoung to extort money from Yunho but they knew differently. Junsu was so unnervingly flabbergasted with the local police’s incompetence that it took all the strength Yoochun could muster to drag him out of there before he did something utterly stupid. Junsu was so worried about Jaejoong that anyone who couldn’t help instantly became his enemy and he refused to hold a civil tongue. He had been so volatile and bipolar that even Yoochun was worried about his mental state. Yoochun had never seen Junsu act so unlike himself and it frightened him.

“We will find him Su.” reassured Yoochun as he sat down on the couch beside Junsu, flashed a supportive smile, and tried to keep him calm “We just have to have faith.”

“Faith?” questioned Junsu sarcastically “How the hell is faith going to help Jaejoong?”

“Su!” softly scolded Yoochun disapprovingly.

“I’m sorry.” apologized Junsu with a sigh “I know I’m not being myself but…”

“You’re frightened and worried.” interrupted Yoochun lovingly “It’s understandable. We just have to try and keep calm and do our best to find him.”

“Worrying ourselves into the ground won’t help find him any faster.” added Yoochun softly.

“I know.” nodded Junsu sadly.

“What a nightmare.” huffed Junsu as he threw his hands up in defeat and leaned his head back on the couch.

The second his head hit the cushion, Junsu immediately grimaced in pain.

“Su?” whined Yoochun softly as he looked at his friend “You really don’t look too good. I really think you should go to the hospital now.”

“No.” growled Junsu in defiance “I told you I’m not going anywhere until we find Jae!”

Junsu had spent the last few hours trying to hide the fact that he was in a considerable amount of pain but Yoochun could see it with every movement Junsu made. Junjin’s bodyguards had really done a number on him and even after Yoochun had practically tried to drag him to the hospital on several occasions, Junsu still refused to get treated. He could care less about the way his face looked or the fact that his ribs were most likely fractured. All he wanted right now was to save Jaejoong. His pain was nothing compared to what Jaejoong would feel under the control of Junjin and Junsu knew it.  

 “But…” protested Yoochun “You’ve been breathing hard for hours now and your face is even more swollen than before.”

“No buts!” argued Junsu “We have to find him first!”

“But we don’t know where he is!” retorted Yoochun softly, before adding “The police can’t even find him and all this running around isn’t good for you. If Jaejoong finds out you’re doing this for his sake, how bad will that make him feel? He wouldn’t want to see you suffering like this because of him. ”

“My comfort isn’t important right now.” grumbled Junsu.

“No but your health is.” fired back Yoochun “You could be seriously hurt and…”

“Just drop it.” ordered Junsu coldly as he raised his hand up and motioned for Yoochun to stop.

“Fine.” sighed Yoochun in compliance “So what do we do now? Do you want to go back out and look?”

“Yes, but we have to wait.” sighed Junsu.

“For what?” questioned Yoochun.

“Till Eun Mi gets here.” informed Junsu “Her plane from the US will be landing in about fifteen minutes and she’ll be here soon after.”

“Does she know what’s going on?” questioned Yoochun.

“If not, she’ll find out when she lands.” answered Junsu “I left her a voice mail.”

“You think she’ll be able to help?” questioned Yoochun.

“Yes.” answered Junsu “Eun Mi is the only one who knows Junjin well enough to find out where he’s hiding. If Jaejoong is still with him she will know where to look.”

 “Shouldn’t we at least tell Yunho what’s going on?” asked Yoochun flatly “He needs to know.”

“Hell no!” fired back Junsu as he stood up and glared at Yoochun “Are you out of your mind?”

“Why not?” questioned Yoochun “He maybe marrying that in less than six hours but you know good and damn well that if he finds out Jaejoong is in danger, he’ll drop everything and come here.”

“I know that. That’s why he doesn’t need to know.” grumbled Junsu as he crossed his arms defiantly.

“What the hell are you saying?” questioned Yoochun angrily as he stood up and glared back at Junsu “This is a perfect opportunity to stop the damn wedding you’re so ing opposed to and yet you won’t tell him? What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Yunho chose his fate.” growled Junsu as he turned his back on Yoochun “He can rot in hell for all I care. I won’t let him interfere in Jaejoong’s life again.”

“Junsu!” scolded Yoochun “How can you say that?”

“Junjin wouldn’t have any idea that Jaejoong was involved with Yunho if he hadn’t taken him to the damn movie premier!” grumbled Junsu.

“What the hell are you talking about?” questioned Yoochun “How the hell does that movie premiere have anything to do with all this.”

“I specifically told Yunho not to take him.” said Junsu angrily “I warned him that with all the press coverage of the event, there was a high probability that one of them would catch Jaejoong on film. I have no doubt that’s how Junjin found out that Jaejoong was back in Seoul.”

“Yunho didn’t listen to me and now we are where we are now because of it.” added Junsu.

 “I never should have introduced them to each other in the first place and kept Jaejoong in New York from the get go!” fumed Junsu “If I had, none of this would have ever happened!”

“This is as much my fault as it is Yunho’s.” sighed Junsu angrily.

“You can’t blame Yunho for this and most certainly cannot blame yourself!” retorted Yoochun “You couldn’t have known that any of this would happen.”

“I did know!” admitted Junsu as he turned back and looked at Yoochun “I always knew that bringing Jaejoong back to Seoul would put him in danger. I had a bad feeling about it from the very beginning but I let Jaejoong talk me into letting him come back –and all because of Yunho!”

“The torture that Yunho had been putting himself through all these years because of Min Hee –I just couldn’t sit back and watch him do that to himself. So when Jaejoong begged me to meet him, I thought that maybe they could help each other get over their guilt and insecurities.” continued Junsu “I had hoped that, in time, Yunho and Jaejoong would understand what makes them uniquely connected to one another, but it looks like that won’t happen now.”

“I’m so stupid.” sighed Junsu “I pinned my hopes on Jaejoong’s ability to reach Yunho but I never thought about the price –or the consequences.”

“I thought this whole thing was about getting Jaejoong and Yunho to fall for one another.” stated Yoochun in disbelief “What are you really up to?”

“It doesn’t matter now.” answered Junsu with a wave.

“I should have just kept Jaejoong in New York and never brought him here in the first place.” grumbled Junsu.

“If I had listened to my own warnings, none of this would be happening and Jaejoong would be safe!” whined Junsu as tears started streaming down his face for the millionth time today “This is what the I get for meddling!”

“Su,” comforted Yoochun as he reached out and gently squeezed Junsu’s shoulder “…this isn’t your fault. Don’t worry, we will find Jaejoong. I promise.”

“And what happens then?” snapped Junsu as he swatted away Yoochun’s arm in pure frustration.

“We’ll help him, anyway we can.” answered Yoochun.

“You didn’t see what I saw. Jae…he…” whined Junsu as he plopped back down on the couch “He didn’t even fight back!”

“He… just…” added Junsu “He gave up and gave in to Junjin so fast. Everything he ever was disappeared in an instant.”

“Jae would never give up!” retorted Yoochun defiantly “He loves us too much just to abandon us.”

“He didn’t abandon us, we abandoned him!”  fired back Junsu angrily.

“We lied to him and sent him away.” sobbed Junsu as he dropped his head and stared vacantly at the floor “We did the one thing we all swore never to do.”

“Jaejoong accepted his fate and gave in because of us and Me.” whined Junsu “If I hadn’t been there, he wouldn’t have just given in like that. He would have fought back.”

“He would have done everything he could to get away from Junjin.” added Junsu “But because of me, because he wanted to protect me… he… didn’t”

“You can’t blame yourself for that.” argued Yoochun “Jae loves you.”

“I know but I don’t think that’s the only reason why he did what he did.” sighed Junsu as he rubbed his eyes in confusion.

“What do you mean?” said Yoochun.

“When he looked at me, he looked scared of Junjin but he also looked as if he was…” sighed Junsu.

“Was?” baited Yoochun.

“I don’t know. Disappointed maybe? Heartbroken?” answered Junsu “I’ve never seen that expression on his face before.”

“I’m beginning to wonder if Jaejoong actually chose to go with Junjin willingly, rather than just because he wanted to protect me.” added Junsu “Maybe he did.”

“Nonsense.” retorted Yoochun “No matter his reasons behind leaving with Junjin, Jaejoong would never turn his back on us.”

“Never?” questioned Junsu “I wouldn’t be so sure Chunnie.”

“Betrayal… isn’t an easy thing to deal with –especially in Jaejoong’s case.” added Junsu with a deep and painful sigh.

As the soft pink hue of morning’s first light cascaded softly in through the nearby window, Jaejoong’s bruised and battered form slept silently in the middle of a large and unfamiliar bed. His beautifully pale face now bore witness to Junjin’s cruelty and his normally thin frame seemed even more diminished than ever before. While the sound of cheerful songbirds echoed throughout the overly large room, Jaejoong quietly began to stir as the sun’s warm rays began to slowly bring him back to the world. As his conscious mind came into focus, and the memories of yesterday hit him all at once, Jaejoong’s eyes instantly flashed open in panic. Sitting up in bed, Jaejoong frantically began to scan his environment looking for any signs of Junjin.  Realizing that he was indeed alone, Jaejoong’s panic seemed to lessen as he let out a deep and fearful sigh.  

Calming down slowly, he took in his new surrounding in awe. The room he was in was elegantly decorated and looked like it had come straight out of his wildest dreams. Crisp white bedding lay gently on four-post mahogany bed, surrounded by beautifully matching furniture, soft and inviting artwork, and fresh flowers adorned the large and airy room while sheer white curtains draped wistfully from large clear windows. “It’s like a memory from a dream.” thought Jaejoong as he smiled at the heavenly scented jasmine delicately placed in a white porcelain vase on the bed side table.

“Junjin…?” questioned Jaejoong softly as he continued to take in the room’s beauty “Did he do all of this?”

“Impossible.” scoffed Jaejoong. “There’s no way.”

 He couldn’t believe that the man that he feared and hated for most of his adult life would create such a place for him. His cruel, controlling, and overbearing personality was all that Jaejoong wanted to remember.  After everything Junjin had done to him all those years ago, Jaejoong refused to feel any sense of understanding or pity for him. He would never let Junjin sway him or sweep him off his feet again–no matter what lengths the man went to. He could never trust him, he would never believe him, and he most certainly would never give him the unconditional love he so craved. Jaejoong knew how obsessed Junjin was over him and even though he understood that was his real reason behind the things he did, he would not dare accept it. He was a man that had forced him into servitude, beat him ruthlessly, kept him from the people he loved the most, haunted his ever footstep, and defiled him at every turn. He would never show Jaejoong any true mercy or love and he instantly knew that Junjin did all of this simply to trick him into believing that this time would be different.

However, no matter how adamant Jaejoong felt about never feeling anything for Junjin, he knew deep down inside that a part of him still cared for the man. There were times when Jaejoong enjoyed being by Junjin’s side and even though he knew now that feeling anything for him was something he should never do, he couldn’t help but still harbor some latent desire for him. After all, they had been lovers for such a long time, and even though it had been forced in the beginning, Jaejoong had eventually come to love Junjin in a twisted sort of way. They were never just a captor and his hostage; they had been something much more than that. Falling in love with your captor seemed utterly stupid and dangerous to Jaejoong now, but back then it seemed perfectly normal and a small part of Jaejoong still missed that feeling. Jaejoong had spent so many years after his release alone that he truly believed that he deserved his loneliness. He had chosen to never find another lover or even allowed himself to be loved by another, simply because he could not trust himself.  He had even kept his closest friends at a safe distance because of it and the thought that he would now be irrevocably tied to Junjin once more, made Jaejoong feel even more apprehensive of his own ability to control himself. His heart was too dangerous to be set loose and if he let Junjin wiggle his way back in, he wouldn’t have the courage to run away again. He knew he would never be able to trust himself around Junjin and the sooner he got away from him the better.

Shaking the emotionally frazzled thoughts from his mind, Jaejoong snatch off his blanket and scooted to the edge of the bed. Dropping his feet onto the soft white carpet, Jaejoong ran his hand through his hair and tried to figure out what he should do. He knew that if he was going to survive being around Junjin and eventually escape him, he had to act as obedient as possible. He had to make Junjin believe that he wanted to be here, that he loved him, but he wasn’t sure how to do it. He had to find some way to make Junjin believe that he loved him without actually letting go of himself in the process.

Beyond worrying about how to get away from Junjin, Jaejoong was more worried about what mental state Junjin would be in, when he eventually walked through that door. Would he be happy to see him or would he still be furious with him? Jaejoong didn’t know and that frightened him. He had abandoned Junjin so long ago and he had hurt him so deeply by doing so, that there was absolutely no way of knowing whether or not the kind or angry version of his personality would show itself first.

“There’s no telling what he’ll do to me.”  thought Jaejoong as he glanced up at the door “Or…what he has done already?”

As the sudden thought of Junjin molesting him while he was unconscious popped into his mind, Jaejoong immediately began to check himself over.  Junjin had always been someone that would take advantage of any opportunity so the possibility he did something to him, while he was asleep, was probable.  As he looked himself over, he noticed that he was still wearing the same clothes he had on the day before and everything was still there –right down to his underwear.

“Unbelievable.” scoffed Jaejoong softly as he realized that Junjin hadn’t touched him “That’s a first.”

Reaching up, Jaejoong gently touched his face as the memory of Junjin slapping him came back to him. As his hand touched his swollen and bruised cheek, Jaejoong grimaced in pain. While his injury throbbed softly, Jaejoong glanced down at his body and noticed that his face wasn’t the only thing that was hurt.

“Damn him.” muttered Jaejoong as he looked at his arms and saw the two large bruises that the bodyguards had left on him.

 Looking at the table clock and then dropping his eyes to the floor, Jaejoong realized that it had been twelve hours since Junjin had taken him and instantly wondered if Junsu was alright. He had never wanted the people he cared about most in this life to ever be in danger because of him. He always wanted to see them safe and had spent the last six years trying his utmost best to keep their existence a secret from anyone who had been associated with Junjin –for fear of what would happen to them if he knew. The moment he saw Junjin’s face outside his apartment, he had been fearful for his own safety but silently thanked the gods that he had been alone at the time. Eun Mi, Yunho, Junsu, and Yoochun, were nowhere to be found and therefore they would be safe from Junjin’s wrath. When Junsu appeared before them, trying to save him, Jaejoong’s heart immediately sank. He knew if he didn’t do something to quickly calm down Junjin, Junsu would have met a terrible fate. After begging and pleading for Junsu’s safety, he still couldn’t persuade Junjin not to hurt his dearest friend and despised himself for putting Junsu in such danger. He loved his friends more than he would ever love himself and he would have gladly taken all the punishment Junjin would give –as long as his friends were safe.

As the memory of Junsu writhing in pain flooded back to him, Jaejoong suddenly began to cry. He couldn’t bear the thought of Junsu being hurt because of him and he had been. He tried to protect him and even pandered to Junjin’s ego to save him but he had failed. Junsu had been beaten because of him and he hated it, and himself.

“Why didn’t he listen to me? I told him not to interfere.” cried Jaejoong as he buried his face in his hands and continued to sob.

As time eerily trickled by, Jaejoong slowly began to come back to his senses and regain his composure. He knew that being an emotional mess right now would not help him when it came to dealing with Junjin. While he was still worried about Junsu’s health and wellbeing he also knew that at this moment, there was nothing he could do to help him. Pulling his hands from his face and wiping away his tears, Jaejoong sighed deeply as the sound of the nearby door opening caught his attention. Without looking up, Jaejoong waited with baited breath for what was to come next.

Without saying a word, Junjin closed the bedroom door and walked up to Jaejoong. Standing in front of him, Junjin looked him up and sighed disappointingly. “What will he do to me?” thought Jaejoong as stared down at the floor and softly began to quake in fear as an eerie silence slowly filled the room. As the minutes passed like hours, Junjin stayed silent and didn’t move and Jaejoong began to fear the worst. Junjin had never been one to act this way, to say nothing, and now he was suddenly acting completely unlike himself. As Jaejoong’s sense of panic began to grow, he dropped his bowed head lower and closed his eyes –waiting for the blow that was sure to come. 

“Jae.” whispered Junjin softly as he took a step in Jaejoong’s direction.

As Jaejoong instantly flinched in fear, Junjin looked down at him in surprise and sighed heavily.

After all the beatings he had received in the past, this simple and uncontrollable reaction made Junjin step back and his heart instantly sank when he realized how truly terrified Jaejoong was of him at that moment. Junjin loved Jaejoong more than anyone could possibly imagine and after all the pain he had caused Jaejoong in the past, all he wanted to do was to make up for it. He had to do something to make Jaejoong understand that he wasn’t there to hurt him –he wanted to protect him. He knew he had to do something to put Jaejoong at ease or he would never be able to say what he wanted to say.

Suddenly, and without another word uttered, Junjin dropped to his knees in front of Jaejoong and bowed his head to the floor. Shocked, Jaejoong looked up at his worst nightmare and couldn’t believe what he was seeing. Junjin was not only being unusually quiet and non-violent but now he was suddenly being submissive as well?

“What the hell is wrong with him?” thought Jaejoong “He would never humble himself before me.”

“This has to be some sort of trick.” thought Jaejoong.

As his mind continued to race with all the possible explanations, Junjin continued to keep his head down and say nothing. An unusual feeling suddenly washed over Jaejoong as he wondered if perhaps Junjin had finally come to terms with their relationship. “Could he possibly…” thought Jaejoong.

“I’m sorry.” apologized Junjin softly .

“Sorry?” thought Jaejoong as he continued to look on in surprise “What the hell is he talking about?”

Junjin gently reached out, placed both his hands on Jaejoong’s knees, and squeezed softly.

“Please?” begged Junjin as he lifted his head up and revealed his tear-filled eyes “Forgive me.”

“Forgive you for what?” questioned Jaejoong apprehensively.

“Everything…” cried Junjin painfully “The way I’ve treated you, the things I’ve done to you, everything.”

“I never wanted to hurt you.” confessed Junjin lovingly “I just…didn’t want to lose you.”

“What are you trying to say?” questioned Jaejoong as he looked on in utter confusion.

“I’m so sorry.” repeated Junjin heartbrokenly.

As Junjin’s tears continued to stream down his face, Jaejoong flashed a small sorrowful smile at Junjin as his apology began to sink in. He knew that this was something that Junjin had never done before and even though he wondered what Junjin was really up to, he couldn’t help but notice the sincerity in his eyes.  Jaejoong had never denied the fact that, deep down, Junjin truly did love him and a part of him still loved him too. Jaejoong had accepted his feelings for Junjin a long time ago and did what he could to bury them, but even after all this time, Junjin’s feelings had never changed.  Even though he had hoped that Junjin would forget him someday, he suddenly felt a ping of guilt in his heart as he now understood that Junjin had still been pining for him all this time and had been truly suffering without him.

Junjin released his grip on Jaejoong’s knees, and after carefully gliding his hands up Jaejoong’s thighs, he grabbed Jaejoong by the waist, pulled him in close, and hugged him gently.

“I’m so sorry.” cried Junjin heartbrokenly “I never wanted to be this way with you. I never wanted to hurt you.”

Jaejoong’s heart instantly sank as the sound of Junjin’s heartbroken voice gnawed at his conscience. In his mind he knew he should never give Junjin any semblance of hope for their relationship but in his heart he couldn’t help but feel responsible for Junjin’s pain. Jaejoong immediately blamed himself. He had given Junjin what he wanted all those years ago, and when he left, he had taken away all of the happiness that Junjin had. As guilt began to overtake his reason, Jaejoong quietly lifted his shaking hands, wrapped them gently around Junjin’s shoulders, and hugged him carefully without even thinking.

 “I’ve missed you so much.” cried Junjin as he nuzzled deep into Jaejoong’s neck.

“I’ve missed you too.” admitted Jaejoong softly.

 “I’m sorry.” apologized Jaejoong hesitantly as he patted Junjin on the shoulder and his guilt overwhelmed his reason “I shouldn’t have left like that.”

“You shouldn’t have left at all.” sighed Junjin as he gently pecked Jaejoong on the neck and hugged him tighter.

“.” thought Jaejoong as the mood in the room instantly changed. He had shown Junjin pity and now he would certainly regret it.

Junjin, as opportunistic as always, nuzzled deeper into Jaejoong’s neck and kissed him again. Fully intending on rekindling the love he lost all those years ago, Junjin slowly released his grip from around Jaejoong’s waist and glided his hand up under the back of Jaejoong’s shirt and caressed his skin lovingly. Jaejoong instantly closed his eyes and tried to fight off the feeling of Junjin’s touch. Jaejoong knew what was happening. He knew what was on Junjin’s mind and he knew all the lengths Junjin would go to, to manipulate him and make him surrender to him fully.

“Junjin…” protested Jaejoong softly “Please don’t.”

Ignoring Jaejoong’s request, Junjin started trailing kissing down Jaejoong’s neck and coyly ran his hand down Jaejoong’s back and slipped his fingers under his waistband. Pulling Jaejoong closer to him, so that every inch of their bodies now rested against each other, Junjin lifted his head and stared deeply into Jaejoong’s eyes.

“I love you.” whispered Junjin softly before he leaned in and kissed Jaejoong on the lips.

Jaejoong didn’t react. He sat there frozen in place and hoped that if he didn’t reciprocate the kiss, Junjin would stop. His hope quickly vanished as Junjin didn’t even notice and deepened the kiss even further. Running his hands up and down Jaejoong’s body, Junjin was determined to have Jaejoong at that moment. The more Junjin fondled him and kissed him, the more Jaejoong’s desire began to overtake his senses. He knew that Junjin was deliberately pushing his buttons and as much as he tried to fight it, he knew at this rate he would eventually give in. He wouldn’t be able to fight him off for very long because Junjin knew him that well.

Deepening the kiss once more, Junjin slowly pushed Jaejoong back onto the bed and crawled on top of him. Hovering above him, Junjin slowly ran his hand down Jaejoong’s neck and shoulder before placing a firm grip on Jaejoong’s shirt and jerking the fabric as hard as he could. The force of Junjin’s movements, instantly sent buttons flying, as he ripped Jaejoong’s shirt open with all the desire within him. Junjin trailed kissed down Jaejoong’s neck as he slowly ran his hand down Jaejoong’s chest and moaned softly at the feel of his lost love’s skin. Looking back up at Jaejoong, Junjin instantly kissed him again and slowly began to glide his hand down Jaejoong’s abdomen. As his hand made contact with the front of Jaejoong’s jeans, Junjin slipped his fingers under its waistband and pulled wantonly. Breaking the kiss once more, Junjin stared into to Jaejoong’s beautiful eyes and smiled lustfully.

“Please come back to me.” breathed Junjin softly as he gently ed Jaejoong’s pants and slipped his hand inside.

As the haze of desire overtook him, Jaejoong’s submissive mentality took over and in that moment he truly believed that this is where he had always belonged. No matter how much he tried to dilute himself with other relationships, it was Junjin who knew him best and would always protect him. As this realization finally hit him, and Junjin’s hand came in contact with his sensitive place, Jaejoong suddenly let everything go and with a sinful moan, gave in.  As Jaejoong’s moan filled the room, Junjin knew he had finally won. He immediately leaned in and kissed Jaejoong with all the passion and desire that had been trapped within him for the last six years and sighed happily when Jaejoong wrapped his arms around him and kissed him back. 

 As Junjin continued to tease Jaejoong over and over, he felt a sense of satisfaction wash over him as he finally came to grips with the fact that the  man he had loved for so long was finally back in his arms. Junjin knew that this was a once in a lifetime chance and he would not ruin it for anything.  Freeing his hand from Jaejoong’s pants, Junjin wrapped his arm around Jaejoong’s waist and lifted him slightly off the bed. Reaching down with his other hand, Junjin grabbed the waist band of Jaejoong’s pants and slowly began to pull them off when he was immediately interrupted by the sound of his cellphone ringing and buzzing in his pocket.

“Not now.” thought Junjin.

As the phone continued to ring, Junjin tried to ignore it but he could sense that Jaejoong was getting annoyed.

“Answer it.” said Jaejoong as he broke the kiss and sighed heavily “It may be important.”

“Nothing’s more important than you.” moaned Junjin as leaned and tried to kiss Jaejoong again.

“Jin Jin” scolded Jaejoong sweetly, as he reached up and pushed Junjin back “…just answer it.”

“Alright.” whined Junjin frustratingly.

Straddling Jaejoong’s hips, Junjin sat up and dug his cellphone from his pocket. Looking at the screen, Junjin’s face instantly dropped as he notice who the caller was. Hitting the button and lifting the phone to his ear, Junjin sighed disappointingly before he spoke.

“Yes brother?” answered Junjin as he flashed a sad look in Jaejoong’s direction “What is it?”

“Jiyoung…” thought Jaejoong as he watched Junjin on the phone.

“Now?” questioned Junjin in disappointment “But… I thought… Alright! I understand.”

“I will!” he added coldly before he quickly hung up the phone and looked down at Jaejoong angrily.

“What is it?” questioned Jaejoong softly “Is something wrong?”

Junjin instantly tossed the phone on the bed beside Jaejoong, leaned in, and pecked him softly on lips.

“I have to go for a little while.” moaned Junjin.

“Now? Why?” questioned Jaejoong.

“You know how he is.” sighed Junjin as he crawled off the bed and stood up “You stay just like that. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“Alright.” agreed Jaejoong with a nod.

Junjin adjusted his shirt and smiled sweetly at Jaejoong before he walked out of the room, closed the door, and locked it. As the sound of the door locking echoed through the room, Jaejoong immediately came to his senses. “What the hell?” questioned Jaejoong as he gently hit himself on the head in disbelief “I know better than this!”Jaejoong stared up at the ceiling and tried to come to grips with what had just happened. He was disappointed in himself for giving in to Junjin so quickly, but he was even more disappointed in the fact that he really did want Junjin in that moment.

Sitting up in bed, Jaejoong looked at himself and felt disgusted. He had done something he swore he would never do again and he instantly felt dirty all over. He had let Junjin touch him again and he had liked it. He had given in and in doing so he had turned his back on the people who loved him the most. He had betrayed their love, their trust, and their kindness all because he couldn’t control himself.

“Damn it!” cried Jaejoong as he pushed himself to his feet and made his way to the bathroom as the tears he had been holding back moments earlier began to stream unheeded down his face. Slamming the bathroom door behind him, Jaejoong looked up at his reflection in the mirror and instantly felt sick. He was disgusting, a liar, a betrayer, and a . He didn’t deserve to have friends. He didn’t deserve to have family and he sure as hell didn’t deserve their love. He was useless and pathetic. As his guilt and anger at himself continued to eat him alive, Jaejoong cried out in overwhelming misery and punched the mirror as hard as he could as a vision of Yunho and Junsu smiling back at him seemed to flash across the mirror’s reflection.

Pulling his bloody hand back away from the shattered mirror, Jaejoong stared down at the broken glass in the bottom of the sink and remembered he had been here before. “Shouldn’t I just end it?” whispered Jaejoong softly “They would be better off without me anyway.”

“I don’t deserve them.” cried Jaejoong.

Picking up a piece of the mirror, Jaejoong stared into its reflection and thought about all he had endured because of Junjin and all that he would now have to face again. As his mind became flooded with all that pain and misery, Jaejoong lowered the mirror fragment and placed it gently on his wrist. With a deep a painful sigh, Jaejoong began to drag it across his skin when the sound of Yunho screaming “Jae, don’t!” suddenly echoed in his mind.

Completely startled and shocked, Jaejoong dropped the glass shard immediately and stepped back from the sink. Jaejoong looked down at his wrist and couldn’t believe what he had almost done.

“What the hell is wrong with me!” screamed Jaejoong hysterically as he reached up, ran his fingers through his hair, and pulled harshly.

Falling back against the wall, Jaejoong collapsed onto the floor and cowered like a small child as the memory of Yunho’s face that night on the balcony flashed across his mind. Yunho looked so scared and heartbroken that night, that even through the fog of his own pain, the look on Yunho’s face had been seared into Jaejoong’s memory forever. He swore that would never do something like that to Yunho again and he had almost broken that oath –all because of Junjin.

“I can’t…” cried Jaejoong “Yunho would never forgive me.”

As the scent of Junjin’s cologne suddenly wafted past his nose, Jaejoong immediately retched as he realized that his smell was all over him. Suddenly feeling the urge to vomit, Jaejoong crawled over to the toilet and bent over just in time before his stomach emptied itself. After the violent convulsions stopped, Jaejoong staggered to his feet and tried to catch his breath.

“Disgusting.” thought Jaejoong as he suddenly stripped off all his clothes and threw them in the trash can.

Turning towards the shower, Jaejoong turned the water on and set the temperature to as hot as it would get and then jumped in. Scrubbing himself ferociously, with mounds and mounds of soap, Jaejoong tried to rid himself of Junjin’s smell and the sense of self loathing that had overcome him. As his skin began to turn from pale white to a bright red, Jaejoong continued to scrub and scrub in hopes that he could somehow make himself clean again and in some way take away what he had done in the process. No matter how hard he tried, the feelings of disgust and hate he had for himself wouldn’t go away and with one final act of frustration, Jaejoong collapsed onto the cold tile floor and slung the bar of soap and scrubber in his hands across the shower stall.  Burying his head in his knees, Jaejoong cried harder than he had ever done in his entire life.  

With his hands interlaced in front of him, Yunho sat quietly on the chair in his living room and stared at his tuxedo lying on the couch in front of him. In just a few hours, he would stand before his friends, his family, the world, and God and promise to marry a woman that he didn’t love –all for the sake of his career. Yunho couldn’t believe that his life had come to this, that he we going to sign away his freedom all because of one simple mistake. Over the years, Yunho had come to terms with the fact that he would always have to end up doing things he didn’t like, simply because of his career, but he never thought that marriage would be a part of it. He never wanted to get married. He had seen the hardships his parents had went through all throughout his childhood and he didn’t want that for himself or the person he loved. He had sworn to never be married and now life was dictating that he had too. He had lived his life poorly, treated the woman in his life badly, and now he was going to pay for those sins.

“I guess this is my life now.” sighed Yunho as he leaned back on the couch and stared up at the ceiling.

Standing up, Yunho just shook his head and sighed deeply. No matter how much he wanted to run away in this moment he knew he couldn’t. Walking over to the couch, he reached down and picked up his tuxedo. With one final sigh, he tossed it over his arm and headed for the church.

“Wake up!” yelled Junjin as he suddenly snatched Jaejoong out of a dead sleep and out of bed.

Hitting the floor hard, Jaejoong shook off the haze of exhaustion that had plagued him after his mental breakdown two hours earlier and looked up at a now extremely furious Junjin in disbelief.

“Jin Jin?” answered Jaejoong cautiously as he glanced up at Junjin and noticed to extremely large and intimidating men behind him.

“Shut up!” growled Junjin as his temper flared beyond reason “Don’t say another word.”

Jaejoong instantly coward at the sound of Junjin’s voice and knew that something bad was fixing to happen. There was only one thing in this world that ever got Junjin this angry and it had absolutely everything to do with Jaejoong. Jiyoung had called Junjin out hours before and he returned in such an irate state that there was only one real explanation for it. Jiyoung wanted Jaejoong.

“Get him up.” growled Junjin as he looked up at his two bodyguards.

“Where are we going?” questioned Jaejoong in a panic as the two bodyguards grabbed him by the arms and jerked him up off the floor “Jin Jin what’s wrong?”

“I said shut up!” yelled Junjin as he balled up his fist, ready to explode at any moment.

For a moment, Junjin stared at Jaejoong with a mix of worry and anger on his face before he his heels and headed for the bedroom door. As the bodyguards began to drag Jaejoong along, he finally realized that something was extremely wrong. Jiyoung had sent for him, that was for certain, but what he wanted with Jaejoong was completely unknown. The more Jaejoong wondered what was really going on right now, the more frightened he became. Junjin would never let anyone separate them but there had always been something strange about the power that Jiyoung had over him. Had anyone in the world tried to come between them, Junjin wouldn’t hesitate to kill them but, when it came to his brother, he always backed down. Knowing this, Jaejoong wondered what in the world Jiyoung had said to him, to make him so angry that he would take it out on him. After Junjin’s heartfelt apology, what was happening now just didn’t make sense.

Dragging Jaejoong down a long hallway and coming to stop near a large oak door, Junjin reached up and knocked on the door hesitantly. As the sound of Jiyoung’s muffled voice was heard saying “Enter.”, Junjin sighed heavily and opened the door. Walking in to the spacious and ornate office, Junjin stepped aside and let the two bodyguards drag Jaejoong in. As they reached the middle of the room, the two men instantly threw Jaejoong to the floor harshly and took a step back. Landing on the ground, Jaejoong caught himself with his arms and after taking a deep breath, he looked up to see Jiyoung angrily glaring down at him from behind his large desk.

“As you ordered, sir.” declared Junjin in a stern and cold voice.

Jiyoung slowly stood up, adjusted his suit jacket, and make his was from behind his desk to the middle of the room. Standing in front of Jaejoong, he looked him over and smiled sheepishly.  Jiyoung slowly knelt down on one knee and grabbed Jaejoong by the chin.

“Hello precious.” said Jiyoung sarcastically.

Jaejoong instantly darted his eyes away from Jiyoung’s stare, making him instantly annoyed. Snatching Jaejoong’s chin left and then right viciously, Jiyoung inspected Jaejoong’s face and glowered angrily at his former pet.

As Jiyoung looked up at Junjin with a satisfied smirk, all of Jaejoong’s courage and hope instantly vanished.

“My time is up.” thought Jaejoong painfully.